As I lay here I wonder how I got myself into my current situation, I was cuddling with my boyfriend Kendall Knight. Well I knew how I got there, but I'm referring to why I'm lying here waiting for my alarm to go off so I can wake Kendall up, now you may ask why I'm doing this. Simple answer Kendall and I had been going out since I moved back to Minnesota, my first day back he helped me unpack and needless to say we lost our virginity to each other and ever since then I've been his secret even to our best friends Logan and Carlos. Kendall had a girlfriend when I came back and a mean one at that, I thought when Kendall and I slept together and he told me that he loved me, he would leave her…well he didn't every time I bring it up he snaps at me and says he doesn't want to talk about it. It's been three months since I've been back, three months since Kendall and I lost our virginity, three months since I've became his secret…and honestly I'm sick of it, sick of seeing him prance around with Lynn talk about Lynn everything that comes out of his mouth is about that bitch! As I continue with my rant I hear my alarm go off…guess it's time to wake up Kendall.

"Kenny…Kenny…Kenny baby wake up" I say as I shake him a little

"'M sleeping Jay go back to bed" Kendall mumbled

"Kenny it's time for you to get up…your alarm is going off" I said as I kissed his forehead

"Don't wanna get up" Kendall said as he turned to snuggle into my side

"Then don't we can ditch school and lay in bed all day" I said as I ran my fingers through his hair…which was the wrong thing to do, because as soon as I said school Kendall got up

"Shit I forgot I have to pick Lynn up" Kendall said as he started to put his clothes back on

"Kendall why do you always bring her up?" I said as I rolled on to my side so I wasn't facing Kendall

"Jay she's my girlfriend and I-"Kendall said before I cut him off

"She may be your girlfriend…but what about me Kendall? Huh I'm your boyfriend the one that you said you loved…the one you lost your virginity to, or do you not remember that?!" I said as silent tears ran down my face. I felt the bed dip and Kendall's hot breath on my neck.

"Jay I remember all of that…but she was there when-"once again I cut him off

"I know she was fucking there Kendall…I know she was there when I wasn't... I know that while I was off in L.A trying not to fucking kill myself she was here I fucking know that!" I yelled as the tears poured down my face I turned so I was looking Kendall dead in the eye "I know that she was there…but I'm here now Kendall where is she?"

"Jay I-I-"Kendall tried to say, but it was apparent that he couldn't form a sentence so I formed one for him.

"Kendall I think you need to leave" I said as I rolled back so I wasn't looking at him.

"Jay I'm sorry...I didn't know-"Kendall tried but was intruppted by his phone ringing, and by the ringtone I knew it was Lynn

"Kendall where are you?" Lynn asked in a bitchy tone

"I'm –I'm on…my way" Kendall said in a defeated tone

"Just hurry the hell up…oh and don't bring James with you" Lynn said

"Why not?" Kendall asked in confusion

"Because I think he's a queer" Lynn said

"Don't call him that" Kendall said as he looked at James

"Whatever just get here" Lynn said as she hung the phone up

"Jay…baby talk to me please" I asked

"You n-need to leave" James said as he tried to hide the fact that he was crying

"Jay I don't want to leave you like this" I said as I crawled beside him

"Just go Kendall…me crying never stopped you before when it came to her" James said as he pulled his blanket closer to him

"Jay I love you…even if you don't believe me" I said as I kissed his temple and started out of the room about halfway out I stopped

"I hope we can talk later…you know when we meet up with Logan and Carlos" I said as I looked at the ball that was my boyfriend, he didn't move or anything. I walked out of his house locking the door behind me, it had snowed the night before and I was hoping that school was cancelled if so I had more time to talk to James, as I made it to my house my mom was on the couch watching the news.

"Looks like you have the day off" my mom said

"Cool um I'm going to take a shower" I said as I sprinted upstairs I shot Lynn a text telling her school was cancelled and my car wouldn't start. I didn't want to be around her all she wanted to do was have sex or atleast try to get me to, that's right I still had been avoiding having sex with her I didn't want anyone else but James I love him…even though I hurt him every day by being with Lynn. As I make it up to my room I look at a picture of James and I, we had went to the mall and took pictures in the photo booth that was our official first date, even if it had to be a secret. I knew I had to make things up to James, but I didn't know how no one knew about me and him so I couldn't really ask Logan and Carlos for help, guess this was up to me maybe a shower would help me think. All I know is I can't lose James…not again.

So watcha think?...I had a lot of messages asking for a sequel so here you go…please r&r Thanks :)