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Not About Angels - Birdy (Inspired the last section of this chapter)

Chapter Thirty Nine - Not About Angels

"Isn't it obvious, Stefan? It's all an act. Being a vampire is miserable."

Being on this island with you is miserable, Elena thought to herself as she tore her eyes from the frames of Rebekah and Stefan, who sat shoulder to shoulder by the fire. She shouldn't have felt bitter jealousy as the two shifted closer to each other, but for herself to deny it was pointless. Soundlessly wandering through the trees, sticking to the shadows as her very nature instructed her to, Elena made her way to her tent.

Her fingers still burned from touching Damon, her lips still remembered the way he tasted. He was troubled, that much she knew. He was afraid that she would lose her feelings for him.

As if. Once upon a time, Stefan may have been the love of her life, but that time had come to an end. She loved Damon - she knew it, she could feel it in her very core. Although, that didn't explain the jealousy she felt towards Rebekah.

Elena found her tent, unzipping the front, expecting to find Damon. The space was empty. Sighing, she closed the entrance and began sifting through her bags, stripping out of her winter coat. She shouldn't have brought so many clothes; she was a vampire, the cold never bothered her anyways.

She wasn't jealous of Rebekah and Stefan, she decided. She was jealous that he liked her. That he was sitting by the fire next to her. Elena hated that Stefan was so angry with her, although, she supposed, she justly deserved his frustration.

Elena just wanted to be human again.

A shadow was cast on the side of her tent by the fire. Startled, she stood, pulling back the entrance to see who stood outside. She breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of Mr. Westerly, but then again, maybe she shouldn't be so relieved.

"Don't be frightened - it's just me," Samuel said as he made his way past her, as if it would put her at ease.

"Just you," she muttered. Elena looked him up and down as he started to walk away, his back turned towards her. "Hey, Mr. Westerly?"

He inclined his ear to her as he halted.

"Why are you here? Why are you helping Shane?" she questioned.

"I'm not helping Shane for his sake," he explained, his dark eyes catching the light of the fire where Stefan and Rebekah sat. "I'm helping him because of Silas."

"Why?" she prodded.

"I want to raise someone from the dead," Samuel mumbled, turning again, obviously not intending to elaborate.

"My mother, right? You loved her."

Sighing, he placed his hand on a tree trunk, steadying himself. Glancing back at the vampire, he stated, "I would do anything to see her again."

"Even betray Madeleine's trust?"

"That didn't stop you, Elena."

A scream of pain interrupted their exchange.

"Sounds like your boyfriend's enjoying himself," Samuel said nonchalantly, before finally leaving her alone.

Without hesitating, Elena blurred from her spot in the direction of the yelling. Outside of the abandoned shed, she witnessed Damon leaning over Shane, clenching his throat with every intent to end his life evident in his posture.

Suddenly, she had him pinned against the decaying structure, seething as she snapped, "What are you doing?"

Tearing himself away from her, Damon made no response as he ventured out of the shed, a reckless swagger in his step.

"He's psychotic," Shane said, gesturing to Damon, blood smeared against his olive skin.

"What did you say to him?" she demanded irately, as though it was Shane's fault that Damon had attempted to kill him. "What did you say?"

"Only the truth."

Grumbling to herself, she ripped the cords that bound the professor to the chair and freed him, before following after Damon. "What did he say? C'mon, Damon, are you crazy? We need him to find the cure!"

"No, we need the warlock, who still hasn't made an appearance," Damon spat. "I don't trust this guy, Elena."

She made a sound of exasperation. "I don't either but we still need to keep him around. He knows the most about this island. What did he do to make you so angry?"

"Just stop," he barked.

"We're so close, Damon. Look at how far we've come." She shook her head, approaching him gently, trying to ease his fury. "Once this is all over, we can get the cure and everything will be back to normal."

"Exactly, everything will be back to normal."

Catching his drift, she bit, "I'm not arguing with you about this. Damn the sire bond! After I take the cure, my feelings aren't going to change!"

The sky was ridden with clouds, the forest dark and shadows hiding Damon's face as he peered down at her. "Even so, you'll what? Take the cure, become human again, grow old, and die? Maybe I don't want to find this cure. I don't want you to take it."

Stunned, she said, almost pleadingly, "So take it with me!"

"That was Stefan's dream. That was the future you wanted with Stefan." Damon spat his brother's name in distaste. He turned away from her, starting towards the trees as he said with such hatred that Elena flinched, "I can't think of anything more miserable."

All she could do was allow the shocked silence to engulf her.

"I hope you realize that the silent treatment doesn't bother me," I said to Caroline, peeking at her over my shoulder tiredly. My eyes felt sunken, the act of simply breathing taking a toll on me. I had spent the last of my energy on forcing the blonde into the living room. Well spent, was the conclusion I'd come to, yet it had left me devastatingly tired. The night had passed and the sun was beaming in the sky, light seeping through the blinds. Tyler was gone, leaving to visit his mother and make sure she was well in the hospital, but not before promising Caroline that he would return.

"I can't believe this is happening."

"That's funny, I was thinking the same thing," I retorted.

The room had fallen into silence for most of the day. Klaus and Kol never moved; with no way out, there was no point. Caroline had been facing the wall in the corner farthest from us all, obviously trying to ignore our presence.

She finally swerved to glare at me. "It was the only way to make sure you didn't sabotage the whole plan!"

"Something's going to go wrong, Caroline," I croaked, voice filled with worrisome tones. "Someone's not going to come back. Or maybe none of them will come back. Maybe Silas will kill them all."

She snorted, running her fingers through her hair, her expression mocking as she muttered, "Please, Madeleine. This Silas bullshit is a joke."

I glanced at Kol, just to make sure she hadn't provoked him. He remained still. "Even if he isn't real, I'd rather not risk losing everything I love. I don't have much left. I don't even have a mother to go home to."

The blonde looked down, the last fragment of my sentence seemingly getting under her skin.

"I lay there in bed at night, just thinking about all of the things that could go wrong with this hunt for the cure. It defies the very laws of nature, Caroline; once a vampire, always a vampire. Elena and everyone who stands behind her is naive, thinking that this little loop hole isn't going to cost them something they cannot afford. Then there's the whole idea of Silas and it's not worth it, with what's at stake already."

Klaus stirred for the first time in hours. "If only your friends were as wise as you, Madeleine."

Caroline was speechless for a moment. Her features softened and she ran her tongue over her lower lip. "Think of all the good it will do. Elena will be back to normal. Bonnie can have her magic. We always get out, Madeleine. Usually by the skin of our teeth, but we always get out."

"Think of all the damage it's already done. Luck always runs out." Heaving myself to my feet, I shuffled across the hardwood floor over to Kol, who had remained still like his brother, the resemblance so striking. I trailed my fingers down the side of his face, but he forced my hand away bitterly, frustrated. Ignoring him, I said in a hushed tone, "Look at me." More than anything, in that moment, I wanted to forget this hell. I wanted to be alone with him.

His head tilted slowly, orbs meeting mine almost grudgingly.

"Look at me," I chimed repetitively, as if to say, forget them.

Kol studied me before seizing my hand, pulling me towards him. I climbed next to him, my frame so tiny compared to him, letting him bury me beneath his arm. He rested his head on mine, a silent apology for forcing my hand away moments ago; he was never ashamed of public displays of affection. Being near him brought about a certain kind of warmth, one that only he was capable of delivering.

"The world will be a better place once you and your family are gone." Sullenly I thought back to Tyler's words from the previous evening. I couldn't help but wonder what would happen, once they returned with the cure. If they returned with the cure, I thought ominously. Would they really try to kill Klaus? Would Elena return to normal? What was going to happen to Jeremy?

Would they try to hurt Kol?

I tightened my hold on him.

Too many questions were going unanswered.

Too much was going on, and I hated being trapped in the forsaken living room.

A cell phone rang. Caroline snatched the device from her pocket and snapped, "Finally! I have been trying to get in contact with you all night!"

My sister's voice buzzed, "Sorry, Care, but things here are crazy."

"You are not going to believe-"

"I don't have a lot of time to talk, and cell service comes in and out. I need you to do something for me," Elena interrupted, impatient. The sound of waves could be heard in the background, as if she were on a beach of some sorts.

Caroline's face fell, but she asked, "What do you need?"

"Shane's gone, and he took the tombstone and Jeremy with him." She hesitated, as if she was going to tack something else onto the end of her statement, but she held her tongue.

For a brief moment, my eyes flashed and met Caroline's. My hands covered my mouth as Elena's words registered in my mind, worry flooding me as I thought about the professor keeping Jeremy hostage. Even I could hear my heart rate increase nearly ten fold. I tried to calm myself with deep breaths; dying of a heart attack wasn't going to help anyone.

"Damon's missing, too, and we have no idea where he is, whether he's with Shane or not. With the warlock on his side, he has everything he needs to raise Silas. But there's still one other way to find Silas' tomb."

"Klaus' sword?" Caroline guessed, tearing her gaze away from mine to glance at Klaus. Her lips curled in protest. "He's not going to tell me where it is."

The Original defiantly looked out the living room window, proving her absolutely right.

"But he's trapped, and there are only so many places to hide a hunk of metal. We have pictures of Jer's tattoo. If you find the sword and translate the words on it, we'll be able to find Silas' tomb and grab the cure first."

"I'll see what I can do."

"Elena," I called out sharply. Despite what had been exchanged between me and Caroline, she held out the receiver of the phone so I could get my message through. "Keep Jeremy safe."

"Madeleine, look-,"

"If he doesn't make it home, Elena, it will be on you."

The phone snapped shut. "Harsh, aren't we?" she said to me, hands on her hips. I turned my face away, my mind dwelling on the thought of Jeremy.

"They're already falling apart," came Kol's calculated voice. I could feel it resonating in his chest. He hadn't spoken for hours. "This inane search is only going to result in misery, dear Caroline Forbes."

She dialed Tyler's number, ignoring Kol's opinionated statement. "I need you to make a stop on the way back."

"If only you spoke Aramaic," Klaus mused, peering at a clearly frustrated Tyler, who was perched at the kitchen table over a laptop and the hilt of the Hunter's Sword.

Kol muttered something in the strange language, and his brother smirked mirthfully.

Tyler swore, refusing to meet Klaus' antagonizing eyes.

"You've got this," came Caroline's voice as she attempted to silence the hybrid with a wrinkle of her nose and a flash of her own eyes. "See, you've translated all of the symbols on the tattoo!"

Surrounding Tyler's laptop was a scattered set of index cards, each one marked with one of the symbols from my brother's tattoo. Elena, as promised, had sent us the pictures of the markings, and Tyler had discovered the Hunter's Sword hidden away in a remote corner of Klaus' mansion. All he had to do, afterward, was translate the hieroglyphs, which had turned out to be near-impossible as they were from a dead language, Aramaic. A dead language that Klaus and Kol happened to speak fluently, much to Tyler and Caroline's chagrin.

"Passage inside... requires a young senator... and a pretty flower? God, this is hopeless!" Tyler cursed again.

Standing from his spot on the sofa, Klaus' brow knit together as he craned his neck to look at the cards. Fluidly, the language coming naturally to him, he repeated the saying in its original tongue, before translating it. "Requires a hunter in full bloom," he corrected.

"What are you doing?" Tyler said, voice full of loathing.

Klaus ignored him. He seemed suddenly interesting in translating the script, a fact that shocked me; he was no where interested in uncovering the cure, so why would he want to help them? "Bring the sword over here."

Caroline, who had been slumped against the wall, stood to watch curiously, equally stumped as to why Klaus would offer his assistance. Something about the ordeal had piqued his interest.

"Silas rests on the far side, the means of his destruction at hand."

"Klaus, why are you assisting them?" Kol hissed from his place beside me.

Ancient eyes glancing at the pictures of the tattoo, he ordered, "Turn the cryptex to the right. Stop. The hilt reveals a key to a nautical map." Klaus looked up at Tyler. "Turn it counterclockwise. Now turn the other piece in the opposite direction. There's something else."

Turning around, Klaus met Kol's glare. He said something swiftly in Aramaic.

Unexpectedly, Kol laughed. "Well that's just too good, isn't it?"

"What?" Tyler demanded loudly. "What does it say?"

Facing him, Klaus simply gave him a small, pleased smirk.

"Kol, what does it say?" I asked quietly, looking up at him from my place beside him.

Eyes cast towards me, he whispered, "In due time."

Confused, my eyebrows knit together.

Rebekah didn't even know if it was worth it anymore.

On the beach of wherever the hell she was, she looked out at the horizon. The sky was gray, the atmosphere misty. Despite the cold temperature, she didn't feel the frosty nip in the air, a vampire perk. A vampire perk I won't have if I take the cure, she thought to herself.

She had been thinking about the cure a lot lately. Sure, she wanted to be human almost more than anything. She wanted to see herself in the mirror, watch herself grow older and lose the childish face she seen in her reflection for centuries. She wanted to be able to carry a child inside of her, to hold the little baby and be able to say that it was her own.

God, she wanted that. And, she had decided, she wanted it with a certain Salvatore brother. Rebekah Salvatore has a nice ring to it. Sometimes it was nice to let her eternal teenage girl mindset to reign free.

Then, reality would strike her good and hard. What about the enemies she had kept at bay for years, only by her brute strength as an Original vampire? She would lose the only thing that kept them from killing her. What use was taking the cure if it almost definitely ensured her death?

It was an endless cycle.

Her phone rang. Digging it out of her jacket, she greeted, "Hello?"

"Hi, it's Caroline. We've translated the sword. We're emailing you the map and instructions right now."

The cell phone chimed. "I got it. Thanks."

A familiar voice hummed int he background, "Actually it was me who translated it."

"Nik? I don't believe you. Why would you help? You don't want me to be human. You don't want any of us to find the cure!"

"You should be able to live - and die - as you wish, little sister."

Rebekah cleared her throat, looking down at her boots, trying to decide if she believed her brother or if she didn't. He never truly just wanted to help her; he always had outside motives. Selfish motives.

"There's one more thing, Bekah." He paused, and then he began speaking very quickly and very pointedly. "There is only one dose of the cure. If you want it, you have to find it firs-."

The dial tone cut him off.

"Nik? Nik! Are you there?"

No answer. Rebekah ended the call, looking at the screen of her phone.

You have one new email.

A small smile grew on her face, but conflicted emotions suddenly stole her smile away from her.

"Look for something out of place, something that doesn't occur naturally. A drawing, an inscription... a geometrically perfect circle! This is it! This is the spot."

Jeremy didn't really know where he was. He knew that the professor really creeped him out, and her knew that he missed Bonnie and his sisters. He knew that he would have felt infinitely safer with Elena or Madeleine with him. Preferably Madeleine, though, as Elena had been sort of crazy recently. Thinking about his sisters, however, seemed to calm him.

The tombstone, it turned out, had only been a payment. A native on the island (or, he really wasn't sure who the man was, but he had face paint and only wore a loin cloth, despite the cold climate) had led them to the cave that held Silas, reading his tattoos and translating the map, but soon had disappeared with the tombstone. After that, Jeremy had spent his time scheming, knowing that with his size, he had the upper hand. He had been sizing up Professor Shane for the duration of their hike but, unfortunately, his warlock had made an appearance before Jeremy could take a course of action.

His name was Solomon.

The warlock had an ancient and powerful aura. He sent shivers down Jeremy's spine; he had a feeling that Solomon was capable of doing quite horrible things. It was the same feeling he got around Klaus.

"This is the entrance to Silas' tomb," Solomon said, kneeling down to touch the dirt that covered the perfect circle. "Hunter, stand here. Take off your shirt."

Jeremy didn't dare to argue with him. Shuffling over to the warlock, he stripped off his shirt and allowed Solomon access to his Hunter's mark. He touched his chest, his hands ice cold.

"You can do this?" Shane questioned anxiously.

"Do not doubt me, Atticus," Solomon said without emotion, shutting his eyes and inhaling deeply.

The tattoo began to disappear and the earth began to quake.

And Jeremy was afraid.

"You can't kill Tyler."

Klaus looked up at Caroline. She had been quiet for so long, contemplating. But now, she spoke up, staring Klaus dead in the eye.

Oh, how the tables had turned. Klaus had revealed the truth to us by his outburst to Rebekah over the phone: there was only one dose of the cure. That factor complicated things and suddenly the alliances that had been formed by the hope of finding the cure were being torn down. And now, the chances of curing Klaus were nearly impossible, which meant that Tyler needed to get far away from the Original.

"No, I can. Moreover, I want to," Klaus said, cocking his head to the side, as if her pleas for Tyler's life were cute.

"Just let him go. Let him live far away from here," she said, so close to begging.

Klaus laughed humorlessly. "So he get's to live a happy life? After he turned all of my hybrids against me? After he attempted to kill me? After he made it his life's mission to find the cure and use it against me? You expect me to let him off, Scotch-free?"

"We all want the cure, Klaus-."

"Not all of us."

She stopped talking.

"You don't want the cure," he said knowledgeably. "You like who you are know, compared to who you were as a human. You like being strong and ageless. You like being a vampire."

Caroline remained speechless for a moment.

Kol seemed disinterested in the exchange, yet I was enamored by the way Klaus looked at Caroline; it was as though he was looking at the sun.

"You and I, we are the same."

She didn't tear her gaze from him. Gaining her voice, she said, "If we are the same, then show me compassion. I know you're capable of it, Klaus. I know it was you who tried to drown Carol Lockwood and I know it was you who saved her. You are capable of being compassionate. Show him the mercy I would show you."

Klaus tilted his chin upwards slightly as he said, "Fine, I'll let Tyler live. But he must leave Mystic Falls. That is the only way I'll leave him be."

I felt like I was intruding a private moment, but I could see it in Caroline's eyes. She was relieved that Tyler would live, no doubt, but there was something else. A new light in her features. I could recognize it but, before, it had been devastatingly dim. Now, it made her features glow and she simply could not contain it.

Caroline had feelings for Klaus and they were what put a relieved smile on her face. It was not the fact that he had allowed Tyler to live, but that Klaus had changed.

For her.

The intimate moment ended and Caroline retreated to her corner, but the light did not leave her. It was a beacon of sorts. For the first time that day, I felt a little happy. It was nice to feel something other than defeat and worry.

But, of course, it didn't last for long.

I wasn't sure when the boundary spell had stopped working. There was no magical sizzle or something to tell us that it had finally fallen, but Caroline had eventually reached out after two days time had passed and, with a little smile, she had announced that we were free.

That had been hours ago.

I hadn't left with Kol because I wanted to wait for my family. He hadn't stayed because he knew that he wouldn't be able to contain his anger around those who had sought after the cure, despite his warnings. He also knew that if hurt any of them, despite my own anger towards them, he would also hurt me. He hadn't said it out loud, but I knew.

They arrived back home in the middle of the day. I was curled on the couch, feeling drained and tired but enough energy to keep me going. Caroline was keeping herself busy by cleaning the kitchen; the place was a disaster. She chatted with me, a grudge against me no longer evident. Despite the fact that she was responsible for luring Kol and I into the spell, I found that I had already forgiven her. It was hard to be mad at her.

There was a loud noise as they came through the door. I remained on the couch as someone hurried up the stairs. "Get him to his room," someone - Stefan -whispered.

He appeared in the living room.

"Madeleine," he greeted, surprised. "I didn't know you'd be here."

"Look, I know a lot of shit has gone down and we all did things we're not too proud of, but I just need to know that everyone is okay," I said, words fumbling out of my mouth as I stood to face the Salvatore brother.

"There's something you need to know. About Jeremy."

My entire body tightened. I felt my lungs stop working and my mind freeze and my heart stop beating. I knew what he was going to say, I just knew it. It was in the way his body moved, like he was walking on glass, and his eyes looked into mine and I was afraid.

"Silas killed him. Or Katherine killed him, I don't know."

"Katherine?" I repeated in a whisper.

"She was following us on the island," he sighed. "We think that she also has the cure, but we're not sure."

Inhaling shakily, I muttered, "Was he wearing his ring?"

"Madeleine, Jeremy was one of the five. A hunter."

And then the world stopped turning on its axis as the truth set it. Time froze and pain erupted inside of me like fire and I felt as though every ounce of life had been twisted out of me. A scream pierced the air and for a moment I didn't even realize that it was I who was screaming. I stood and blindly started thrashing, screaming, trying in desperation to release the ache that the news had wrought.

Stefan tried to restrain me but no one in the world could keep me together and no one could stop my soul from tearing in two.

"None of this would have happened if you had just listened to me!" I screamed at him. Caroline, who watched me with watery blue eyes, flinched. "This is all your fault! This is all your fault! He was all I had left! I loved him!"

"I know-"

"I hate you! This is all your fault!" A lamp fell victim to my rage as I shoved a table, the piece of furniture falling and shattering on the floor. "He's dead and it's all your fault!"

I couldn't breathe. No longer able to sustain myself, I collapsed on to the floor, overwhelmed with grief and pain and hatred.

I physically felt my heart break.