Notes: Drugged via Dentist and ty to the lovely Drivven Wrinth for being a beautiful Beta.

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Derek sat there drumming his fingers in irritation and nervousness on the tabletop trying to ignore everyone and everything around him – and failing miserably.

His 'loving uncle was quietly chuckling from the corner, though not so quiet as Derek couldn't fucking hear him. Why in the hell couldn't the man be useful and distract the very annoying human playing monkey man?

"Stiles please stop hanging from the banister. If you fall and break your neck your dad will shoot me where it hurts," Derek said while rubbing his temples. He loved Stiles and was touched the Sheriff trusted him enough that he left a drugged Stiles with him after the dentists visit, but right now he also hated them both.

Stiles grinned like a loon and flipped off the banister, only causing minor heart failure to Derek. "Come on Sourwolf, let's have fun. You already said no sex, so let's play catch."

"Catch?" Derek asked hollowly as visions of torture danced in his head.

"Yeah, catch. Ready? CATCH!" Stiles yelled as he launched himself head first toward Derek. (Thankfully not from anything high.)

"Shit! Are you trying to kill us?" Derek asked as he tried, in vain, to get an actual grip on the human octopus currently climbing his body like a tree.

"I will conquer this mighty mountain or die trying! The will of me will prevail!" the stoned Stiles yelled.

"What the hell does that even mean? Would you fucking stop pulling my hair! Fuck, your dad asked me to keep you safe and you are doing your best to make me look like a fucking incompetent mate. Get off!" Derek yelled as he tried to pry Stiles from his shoulders.

Stiles blew a raspberry in Derek's ear before climbing to the man's shoulders and saying "I suggested getting off earlier, but you said no. So, I am going to conquer you and have my dirty sexy way with you. Now – stop weaving before I hurl."

"You had better not throw up on my head. Damn it all the hell Stiles get the fuck off of my shoulders," panic very clearly coloring Derek's voice.

" 'Kay," Stiles said very quietly before going totally limp and, much to Derek's horror, falling backwards.

"Got him," Peter said from behind Derek. "You should take better care of your toys Derek, this one is fragile and breaks easily."

"Don't touch him," Derek growled as he took Stiles from where he had been laying in his Uncle's arms.

Peter smirked and said to Derek's retreating back, "If you turned him you wouldn't have to worry about breaking him. Then again, there is something precious about his fragility. Just think about it!"

Peter sat in the seat Derek had vacated earlier and drummed his fingers in thought. So many plans to make and so little time to do them in..

~Fin~