Accomplice: Quick question, why is it so much fun to scare Freshmen? Oh! And I wanna thank Hotpocket for giving me the idea for the ending of this story and not letting me just quit due to laziness.

Hotpocket Hunter: Huh. it's not often people thank you for inspiring a work of evil, but, hey, who am I to judge? I'm paranoid to the point of once thinking a piano was watching me, have a mild phobia of mirrors, and am completely unperturbed by Ms. Kitsune.

38. New dress-code initiated by Central

a) Stop sending photos of Pajama Day to the Vatican

b) They don't find it nearly as amusing as we do

c) Lenalee, stop wearing your swim suit at HQ, it freaks Komui out

Central decided to skip its monthly inspection and instead sent a letter informing all personnel of the initiation of a new dress-code. 'Wear regular uniforms in public, or outfits approved by Komui and Central.' In protest of this rule, Lenalee and Road wandered around in their swimsuits for a day. Komui found out and nearly wiped out HQ trying to protect his darling little sister from 'the gazes of all those dirty men'. Tyki declared that he washed daily.

Reever stared at Johnny in exasperation. Their conversation had been going in circles for the last five minutes. "Again, why are you wearing your pajamas?"

Johnny gave a sad sigh. "Because I didn't want to get dressed."

"Why not?"

"Because."

"Because why?"

"I didn't want to."

"Why not?"

"Because."

"Because why?"

Finally, Tapp slammed a hand down on the table, startling the two of them from their pointless interrogation. "Enough, both of you!"

Reever turned to yell at him, but stopped with his mouth open, staring in shock. "Tapp, why are you in your pajamas?"

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

Allen was closing the door to his room when he was tackled from behind, sending both him and his assailant flying through the doorway. Allen landed on his back with the mysterious person lying practically on top of him.

"Allen!"

"L-Lavi?" Allen wheezed. "What the-" Lavi's hand covered his mouth. On impulse, Allen licked it.

"Eww! Hey man, I'm trying to help you!" Lavi shrieked, wiping his hand on his pants.

"Help me? By what, attacking me in the hallway and straddling me?!" Allen yelled at him.

Lavi grinned down at the younger boy. "Come on, Allen, I thought you liked me!"

Allen curled his lip, then shoved Lavi off of him. He pushed up off the floor and into a sitting position, facing Lavi. "Again, helping how?"

Lavi's grin widened. "Pajamas."

Allen looked at him, thoroughly confused. "I still don't understand."

"Get your pajamas."

"Why?"

Lavi cocked an eyebrow. "It's Pajama Day."

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

Road peered around a corner. So, it seemed many people were invested in this event. Lenalee was participating too. "Lenalee!" Road called to the other girl.

"Road? What are you doing here?"

Road looked innocently at her. Lenalee instantly grew suspicious. "I was looking for Allen. But Lavi attacked him."

Lenalee looked confused for a moment, then her expression cleared. "Ah. I sent Lavi to put Allen in pajamas."

It was Road's turn to look confused. "Why pajamas?"

Lenalee grinned a grin worthy of Black Allen. "For Pajama Day, of course."

Road beamed back. "I'll get Tyki."

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

Komui nodded his head at the traumatized Reever. "Yes, yes, I've received many reports concerning these events."

Reever looked at him, exasperated. "You don't understand, Chief. Everyone is doing it! I stopped by the dining hall on my way here, even Jerry was wearing-"

"His pajamas." Komui interrupted. "You've mentioned this already. And frankly, I don't have a problem with it. It's not as though it's interrupting anyth-" Komui halted mid-word, jaw dropping open in shock.

Reever twisted around to see what had so surprised his superior (pain in the ass). "Lenalee?" Reever said, also in shock. The girl in question was standing in the doorway, carrying a tray of coffee, smiling sweetly. And wearing pajamas.

"My Lenalee!"

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

Allen stared in disbelief at the reflection in the mirror. Or rather, at the reflection of the red-haired boy standing behind him. "You want me to wear this?" Lavi's reflection nodded, face breaking into a wide grin. Allen looked down at his clothes. Loose pants, gray in color, and a tight blue shirt that showed off his flat stomach. He looked back up at Lavi's reflection. "Are these Lenalee's clothes?"

Lavi adopted an indignant expression. "Allen, I'd never steal from Lenalee! And do you really think that Komui would have let her wear these?" Allen frowned, seeing the logic in in his argument, but not wanting to boost Lavi's already inflated ego. In the mirror, Lavi's grin faded into a smirk. "I found them in the miscellaneous laundry."

Allen's eyelid twitched.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

Tyki tried to run again, forced to stop by the hand that threatened to yank his hair out of his scalp. "Road, get off! I don't want to do this."

He couldn't see the blue-haired demon, but he knew she was smirking. "Not even if it means you'll get to see Allen?"

Tyki groaned. He was never getting drunk around Road again. "Fine. Will you let go of my hair, please?"

She pretended to think for a moment. "Nope! Not until you change."

Tyki rolled his eyes. "Road, I'm not going to change in front of you. And besides, this is one of your rooms. As you yourself have pointed out, I can't leave unless you let me."

Road looked at him seriously. "And yet, you keep trying,"

Tyki shrugged, feeling the weight of the small girl clinging to his back. "Determination. I can't help myself."

Road pondered this a moment, then slid down his back. "Okay. As soon as you're done getting dressed, we're going."

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

Reever glanced around the dining hall. Almost everyone was wearing their pajamas. He wouldn't fall to the insanity. But I might fall into it, he decided, witnessing one of Road's doors open and the Black Order's resident Noah step out in all their sleepwear glory.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

Allen had no idea how he had gotten dragged into this. Somehow, Johnny and Tapp had constructed an elaborate runway down the middle of the mess hall. And then Road had instructed everyone to gather round while Tyki walked through the crowd, picking individuals seemingly at random. All the people chosen were wearing tight and/or revealing pajamas, and Allen was sure Tyki had really been looking for him. When he had spotted Allen, Tyki had grabbed his arm and tugged Allen through a wall to join the other kidnappees. Which was how Allen had gotten here, literally dragged. He mentally congratulated himself on finally working it all out. Sarcastically, of course. He had been spending too much time around Fou.

From farther down the hall, Road waved at him. Allen scowled back and she pouted. He felt a twinge of guilt and immediately squashed it. This was probably all her idea, anyway. The line of people between him and the door moved forward until he could see into the dining hall. Or what used to be the dining hall. Now it was a dark and crowded room, shaking with loud music, and lit by multicolored lights that spun across the room at a dizzying pace. Allen gulped. He did not want to go out there.

Beside him, Road grinned evilly. "Your turn."

Allen turned to her. "Please Road." He really didn't want to resort to begging, but there was no other way. "Don't make me do this. I'll...stay with you for three days, no, a week! Just don't send me out there."

Road just laughed and shoved him out the doorway. Allen stumbled forward, stopping when Road called out to him. He turned, hoping that maybe she'd had a change of heart.

There was a flash of light and a whir, then Road took the developing photograph and looked at it. "Yup!" she exclaimed happily. "This one's a keeper!"

Allen groaned. She doesn't have a heart, you fool he mentally berated himself. Then he turned to face the set of stairs leading up to his fate. A hand grasped his and molded their fingers between his own. Allen's sideways glance revealed a leering Tyki.

"Come on boy, it'll be fun."

Tyki pulled Allen up the stairs and onto the runway, where he dropped Allen's hand and faced the crowd. "And now, ladies and gentlemen, Allen Walker!"

The audience clapped and cheered. Squinting his eyes against the glaring lights, Allen could make out the shape of Lavi waving at him. "Get going, boy." Tyki jerked his head down the runway, leaving no doubt as to what Allen was expected to do. "And give them a show they'll never forget."

As Allen gritted his teeth and began to stride down the long runway, Tyki talked to the crowd. "Allen Walker, a top exorcist for the Black Order, and quite the formidable opponent. Very handsome too. I know quite a few people who'd like to get their hands on him."

The crowd laughed. Allen's blood began to boil. They were supposed to be his friends. But they were letting the Noah do this to him. Allen felt humiliated. Worse than that, he felt angry. And the more Tyki talked, the angrier Allen got until finally he couldn't take it anymore. He turned sharply and glared at the Noah of Pleasure. "Tyki," he growled audibly, "I'm going to KILL YOU!" His voice had risen to a shout by the end of the sentence, and then he was off, running hell-bent for Noah. He caught Tyki's smile as he neared him, and couldn't understand what the idiot found funny about this. And then Allen raced straight through the Noah, off the stage, and into the wall, where he knocked himself unconscious.

Road cackled before snapping another picture. The crowd was clapping and cheering and Tyki was smiling down at the unconscious exorcist. Road admired her handiwork. She had collected some wonderful blackmail material, and Lenalee was planning to send a letter to the Vatican. The plan was a success. Her work here was done.

XxXxXxXxXxXxX

The envelope lay on his desk, top ripped open, contents spilling out onto the polished surface.

A voice from the door asked "Sir, what are your orders?"

The man at the desk remained still, barely even breathing.

"Sir?" The voice asked again.

The man shook his head, and spoke, voice shaky. "I think we need to send a letter. Give the correspondence to Link. he knows what to do."

"Right away, Sir." Footsteps faded down the hall.

Rouvellier returned his attention to the envelope, and shuddered at the pictures inside it. He opened the letter again and read it.

Dear Reary-Dear,

Please accept these as a sign of our undying respect and love for your contribution to our cause. You don't really need to understand this, because at least we know the real meaning. Three things to bare in mind as you continue your journey, alive.

1) Do not harm Allen Walker. He is quite special to us, and we would be extremely put out should anything bad happen to our darling Exorcist.

2) The clothes do not make the man. If you need proof of that, look in the mirror. Snake-face.

3) Cats like horses, but dolphins are the immortal enmity of porcupines. Following this, the daisy belongs with the iris, but the dog needs to lie down.

We hope this letter finds you in the throws of a terrible sickness, but should it not, please jump off a cliff. Sincerely,

Lenalee and Road Camelot

P.S: Tyki says hi.

Rouvellier set the letter down. This called for serious measures to be taken.

Outside the office, Link snickered at the copy of the letter Sleck had passed him. He was beginning to become quite fond of the blue-haired Noah. He opened the envelope he held in his other hand. Lenalee looks pretty good in a swimsuit. I can't wait to see Rouvelier's expression when he sees these.