The next meeting, which to Britain's dismay, was in Paris, as China had suggested. Besides having to see France again, he would have to see Russia, again. He dreaded it. What if Russia told them about the embrace and the petting? I bet France would be jealous….he thought. Why did I even think that?!

Britain shivered and shook it off before stepping out of the taxi. "Thanks, Chap. How much do I owe you?" he asked the cabdriver, taking out his wallet.

The cabdriver smiled, "just a part of your body…ze sexy part…" he cooed.

Britain threw about a dozen euros in the cab and walked away. "That's not what I asked…" he mumbled. "Stupid bloody Frog…they're all alike…"

He walked for a block then entered the building where the meeting would be held. He took a deep breath, and then walked through the doors.

This time, everyone was waiting on him. All eyes watched in silence as Britain crossed the room and sat down at his designated spot with a small Union Jack flag on the desk. As he sat down, a rude and loud farting sound came from his chair. He didn't sit down all the way, before jumping back up in embarrassment.

The other nations burst out laughing, except Russia, but he was smiling as usual.

Britain slanted his bushy eyebrows. "All right, who was the bloody Wanker that did this?" he demanded.

The room was silent as a single sweat drop ran down America's face.

Britain smirked. "Ah ha, I knew it! What do you have to say for yourself?" he looked at America, straight in his eyes. There was no way he could lie now, Britain would know it. He finally had America in the spotlight, and he wouldn't escape his 007 ninja interrogation skills…

"Dude, I'm sorry," America snickered. "I wish I would've thought of it, but it wasn't my idea, Man."

Britain's jaw dropped in shock. "What? Not you? Well, then, who did it?" He looked around at the other nations, but they all had poker faces, all serious, even France.

"Not everyone at once, now," Britain took the whoopie cushion from his chair and put it on the semi-circled desk, where the other nations were sitting as well. "Nobody wants to claim this as their joke? Fine, it never happened…"

Then he realized Russia, although he usually smiled, was the only one smiling. Was he mocking him, or was his face stuck that way, or maybe he was the guilty one? Britain stood still. "…Russia?" he asked, his voice a little shaky. "You did this?"

Russia opened his eyes, from being closed with his usual smiling expression, and answered, "Da. We are thinking it's hilarious…"

Just after he finished, the other nations burst out with laughter and snickers.

"Sorry, Britain, we couldn't resist!" America pounded the desk, as he laughed. "You gotta admit, it was freakn' hilarious…"

Britain frowned. "So it was you after all, you lying Git!"

"Yeah, you got me!" America admitted, holding up his arms, as if he was at gunpoint.

Britain face-palm. Well, at least they don't know about the whole 'hugging thing from that vodka-drinking commie…

"By the way, Britain," America stood up. "What size shirt does Russia wear?"

Britain, not knowing it was a trap, thought for a second then answered, "I'm not sure. Perhaps a large-"

France gasped and stood. "Sacrebleu! It's true!"

"What's true?" asked Britain.

"You 'have a thing for Russia!" France shrugged. "It's all over ze newspapers…zat…you're gay…"

"Maybe in your country, Frog-WHAT?!" Britain blushed and looked over at Russia, who was smiling and shrugging.

"I am wanting some new friends," Russia held his arms out, as if he wanted Britain to come willingly into his controlling embrace. "Join with Mother Russia, da?"

Britain almost peed his pants, again, and blushed. He told them! Well, it's not like I told him it was a secret, but still! I'd never imagine Russia would say anything to them!

"We are friends, da?" Russia asked, repeating Britain's words.

Britain's face was even redder than when Russia had hugged him, petting his hair, and a few moments ago with the whoopie cushion. "That's not what I meant…"

China rolled some die, as Britain just noticed he was playing some kind of board game. He looked up from his game. "Would you like to play Jumanji?" he asked, smiling.

Britain screamed, "so it was YOU!"

China raised an eyebrow.

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