a/n; I am freaking in love with this couple, and I'm determined they will somehow get together even if only through people like us writing fanfiction about them, because they deserved a shot and they never got it. anyways this fic is pretty klaroline heavy as well as I adore them, so if you're not a fan (you're insane!) but also this might not be for you. obvs this fic completely ignores kol's death, presuming klaus got him to back off and hes alive and well. I'm sorry it's taken so bloody long to get this up but the end scenes were super hard to write and I love this fic so wanted to get it just right for you all :3 anyways as always enjoy the kennett love. song recommendations; give your heart a break- demi lovato, diamonds-rihanna and glad you came-the wanted.
It's not that she doesn't feel bad..she just can't understand one minute of it.
It's harsh that suddenly everyone is against her, Elena's between wanting to stranger her and sobbing all the time, Damon's angry and Stefan's upset beyond belief. Tyler's raging constantly and Matt is just as baffled as she is. No one can understand it, and most are hurt over it; including Bonnie.
Carolines dating Klaus.
It happened slowly, over a matter of weeks. It began with her giggling on the bench at his side the day of the Miss Mystic Falls Pageant, and ended with Caroline moving into the Mansion with the rest of the Originals. Everyone questioned compelling but upon the attempted 'rescue mission' Stefan had been staked in the stomach, and Damon had ended up with a broken neck, Elena and Bonnie could hear Caroline sobbing from the car, and knew the love was real.
She does miss Caroline intensely so, she misses her friends bubbly laugh, misses her neurotic planning, misses her voice in times of sadness...but she can't overlook the basic facts; Klaus killed Jenna, killed Elena, killed Carol, was instrumental in the death of her own Mother and made Jeremy impossibly fucked up..it's all down to him and Carolines still hanging of the Original Hybrids arm, Bonnie can't see past that.
Still..she does feel bad.
It feels weird sitting in a booth at the Mystic Grill with Elena and no Caroline, the two can still girl talk but it doesn't seem right somehow, and Bonnie knows Elena's thinking the exact same thing. So when Matt comes over Bonnie makes a break for the bathroom, mainly to avoid the awkwardness; Matt isn't crying over it like Elena, but you can tell he's upset over Carolines sudden flip to the dark side.
Glancing up from the silver taps Bonnie glances at herself in the mirror and shakes her head, how did everything get so fucked up? Honestly Bonnie has no answer.
She feels tears biting at her eyes and quickly turns away from her reflection, part of her knows how wrong and shitty everything is but she doesn't know how to fix it, for once Bonnie can't wave her magic and make everyone happy; she knows that this probably won't be fixed and it hurts, so she keeps her head down to avoid crying as she walks out of the bathroom...
and collides straight into the hottest guy she has ever met.
Her breath is literally taken away from her, she's seen it in all the corny movies when girl meets a boy and is literally knocked off her feet, she's well aware her life isn't some cheesy fucking movie but for a moment she feels slightly windswept and shoots the stranger a dazzling smile.
"I'm sorry..I wasn't looking where I was going" A laugh attaches itself to the end of her sentence and shes well aware when she laughs she sounds like a preschooler awarded with a lolly pop at sticker time, so she drops her gaze before meeting the strangers eyes once more..god he's attractive.
"No problem beautiful" His comment makes her drop his gaze again and her teeth tugs on her lip before she speaks again.
"Well I better get back, I'm Bonnie by the way, Bonnie Bennett yeah erm, you must be new in town" Now she feels stupid introducing herself to a stranger, but still she can't stop looking at him and as she moves around him and he sweeps out of the way her teeth find her lips again.
He shoots her a fantastic smile and she swears her heart splutters. "Nice to meet you Miss Bennett, I'm Kol, Kol Mikaelson"
Her face hardens immediately, and the smile is slapped off her face faster than any vampire can run. A cold trickle of realization trickles down her back and she berates herself for being attracted too him..of course he's a vampire, he's far too gorgeous not to be, and of course he's original. She's heard of Kol, doesn't know much about him other than he has a worse temper than his Brother and can be unbelievably sadistic.
"Ahh I see you've realized who I am and this conversation is finished, but still it was nice to meet you Bonnie, Caroline misses you by the way"
And then he's gone and Bonnie realizes just how much she hates Mystic Falls and how much she loves Kol Mikaelsons smile.
There's snow on the ground whilst Bonnie walks through the square, and she realizes Carolines been at the Mansion for 2 months now and Bonnie really does miss her. Her hands hug her elbows and her mind keeps flickering between her former best friend and the compliment Kol Mikaelson had payed her only 2 weeks ago at the Mystic Grill; she knows shes stupid to linger on it but she knows shes attracted to him and can't fight the urge to think of his smile.
Speak of the devil and he doth appear.
Her eyes flicker up from the snow falling and she meets the gaze of just him; Kol fucking Mikaelson.
"Oh fuck" The words roll off her lips in a whisper and normally she wouldn't care due to being so far away, but he's a vampire and three sets of eyes meet hers and then she registers, he's with Caroline and Klaus...who are holding hands..and who all just heard her.
Double fuck.
Honestly she debates running in the opposite direction but knows she would look stupid. She can just about make out their expressions from her point next to the fountain and notices Kol's smiling at her, Caroline looks on the verge of tears and Klaus looks like he wants to rip her throat out (she doesn't blame him, Caroline is his girlfriend after all).
Instead of continuing forwards and meeting the awkward and painful conversation no doubt waiting Bonnie sits herself down on the icy, cold fountain side and gazes down at the water, again she feels tears in her throat and takes a quick gulp to calm herself.
Her gaze doesn't move as she notices someone sat next to her and wonders who it is (well she knows it's not Klaus, no doubt she would be meeting the same fate as Mayor Lockwood if it was), she's soon given an answer as they speak.
"You know you're being irrational about Caroline, she's told me about you and she painted you in a wonderful light, though she didn't do justice to your beauty" A smile flickers on Bonnies face before she can stop herself and she looks up to see him smiling back.
She has no idea why she sais what she sais next but sais it anyways "I miss her, I do but he helped killed my Mum" .Her voice cracks but she doesn't look away, she can't.
"I've killed a lot of people's Mums, I imagine Stefan has too and Damon and Caroline, and I imagine Elena will, we're vampires we kill people, sure it's wrong but some would say what you do is wrong too" He stops then with a shrug and stands up placing his hands in his pockets. "Just come to the Mansion when you're ready to talk to Caroline or Nik might make you, he hates seeing her upset"
Before she can reply he's shrugging off his black jacket and Bonnie's eyebrows are knitting together in confusion, that's until he places it around her shoulders and her facial expression melts like ice cream.
The second she blinks he's gone and her heart feels like it could burst. She feels tears trickle down her cheeks and she scrubs them away before they're noticeable. How can he be so horrific one moment and so kind the next? Bonnie doesn't know the answer but knows her view has shifted and now she feels like an even worse friend.
Her mind is just full..too full.
She' misses Caroline but is hurt by her actions, she finds herself attracted to Kol but knows he's evil..it's an ever revolving circle of thoughts that won't go away no matter how much she tries.
She's walking from the Grill one night after an awkward evening with Stefan, Damon, Elena and Matt, they had gotten together on Elena's request, Bonnie had spent most of the night starring into her milkshake and thinking of Kol's smile whilst the others made small talk over tequila shots. She hadn't drank herself, she couldn't act like nothing was happening in her mind and she knew alcohol would probably cause her to turn up at the Mansion to simultaneously apologize to Caroline and jump Kol.
Alcohol was definitely a bad idea.
It's dark as she refused a ride from a drunken Damon and she walks down the street to her home, the snows still going strong and it crunches underfoot as she walks forward, she thought she would have heard him coming but of course he's a freaking vampire, the snow doesn't crunch under his foot if he doesn't want it to. So one minute she's alone and the next minute the ever gorgeous Kol is stood in front of her with a smirk on his face.
"Pretty little girls shouldn't walk through the streets alone at night, what if a big bad were to creep up to you?" He grins a teethy grin then and Bonnie smiles, preparing to give him a bad ass aneurysm before stopping herself as the initial pain seemed to have zero effect. "Also I wouldn't try any of that magic mojo, Caroline constantly tries to beat me in fights, it's most amusing watching her lose until she whines at Nik to step in"
Again a smile hits her features as Bonnie can so imagine Caroline calling in her boyfriend for back up but then it fades again as she remembers Caroline probably hates her.
"I don't get it, I don't get how my Brother can be so fascinated on Blondie Barbie, how the Salvatore Brothers can move from one doppelganger to the next" As she goes to speak he cuts her off again "It's just next to you, you're something else Bonnie, something beautiful"
Bonnie swears her smile couldn't get any wider as she mumbles a thank you.
He actually walks her home, and they chat about the small things, shes thankful he keeps away from the topic of Caroline and instead he tells her about his times at war and his years in the Renaissance. Bonnie just laps it up and as the night ends shes feeling a mixture of elated, guilty and worried. She knows shes a huge hypocrite for enjoying herself with Kol and that nearly chases the smile off her face as she goes to bed...
Nearly.
Bonnie knows as soon as she enters Shane's office somethings wrong.
The lights turned out for one thing, and the door is closed; both of these things seemingly normal but not to Bonnie, the candles would always be lit and the door welcoming by open. The second she steps over the threshold her senses are tingling, part of her knows she should run for it but the other can't resist stalking forward, so she does and the sight that meets her in the very next second has her wishing she had left upon her instincts.
The scream dries up in her throat and her hands begin to shake, she just prays the spirits don't choose this moment to swoop on down and hound her about expression.
"Shane" Though she knows he won't answer she sais it anyway before snapping the light on, confirming her horrified suspicions.
His head is lying on the desk, his eyes still open, the pencil jarred through his neck coating the desktop and floor in blood...he doesn't look peaceful as though it's told in novels ,it looks as though Professor Shane had died in agony.
"Who..?" But she's cut off.
"Who would do such a thing? Such a horrible thing?" His voice is mocking as he steps into the light and Bonnie actually fucking whimpers because even with blood streaked on his pale skin, his fangs still pointing and the veins around his eyes bold he looks fucking wonderful and she realizes how much she's missed the sight of him.
"Why.." But again she's cut off.
"Why did he deserve this? He was teaching you expression, correct?" Though he doesn't await an answer and continues "Black magic, basically the kind that's great for a bit then burns out and takes the Witch along with it" He shrugs his shoulders to indicate he hasn't done anything wrong and strolls to the door.
Bonnie really can't find it in herself to say anything and instead glares after him, his words may be true and she will have to chase up such claims but he's killed the man who's been helping her, killed the man she looked up to and actually liked just as a friend for once. Even as the door slams shut Bonnie doesn't say anything instead just leans over the table and shuts Shane's eyes..
At this point she doesn't give a damn what he was teaching her, she just feels broken.
Honestly she can't remember how long she's been crying, but it feels like it's been days.
In reality she knows it can't be any longer than a couple of hours, upon arriving home from Shane's office she had just collapsed onto her bed, grateful for once that her Father is never home, she hadn't gotten up since then, merely bawling herself into a frenzy; the pillow snuffing her sobs.
It's dark out as she sits up and glances out to the moon, tears continue to fall but Bonnie can't find it in herself to care, maybe Shane was teaching her expression but the man didn't deserve to die, and whats worse is that she can't shake her growing care for Kol regardless of what he had done to Shane.
She knows in some fucked up way he thought he was looking out for her, and that just softens her heart before the guilt overloads and she begins to cry again.
"Please stop crying" The voice causes her to gasp and reach for the closest thing to her bed that turns out to be a book, she hurls it in the direction of the voice until the owner of such a voice appears sat next to her on the bed, and the fear recedes (though she's not sure why, surely she should still be terrified of the big bad vampire who could crush her in seconds).
Fuck she feels safe with him, how fucked up could things get?
Her mind flickers to how he got in but then her mind turns back to the night he had walked her home and they had ended the night with coffee, god damn she hadn't even thought of inviting him in back then, how stupid and now without any powers (well ones that would work on an original) or a teacher (regardless of what he was teaching her) there's no way she can spell him back out.
For once he hasn't got the smarmy smirk on his face and she imagines its because of her expression; clumped mascara eyelashes, tear stained cheeks and a broken expression don't exactly have guys trying it on. She tries to give him a smile but upon the twitching of her face she bursts into tears all over again and Kol looks even more freaked out than before.
"I'm sorry, I just..." She begins before more tears fall down her cheeks and she buries her head in her hands, Bonnie honestly just wants him to go, she doesn't need him to see her like this; crumpled and crying like a loser.
The next thing he does is just strange, but causes the butterflies in her stomach to go on a rampage.
He actually lies down next to her, takes her hand in his and puts his arm around her. Though she knows its a bad idea Bonnie rests her head on his chest and he holds her close. It's just perfect and though she keeps trying to remind herself shes snuggling a big, bad Original vampire it just isn't going through to her brain, so instead she locks her fingers with his and shuts her eyes...in seconds shes asleep.
Bonnie wakes up and he's gone but she doesn't care..though her heart feels like it's fallen..right into Kol's god damn lap.
"What are you doing here?"
Bonnie expected many things on knocking at the Mikaelson's door. She guessed to meet rejection from Caroline, pain from Klaus and teasing from Kol but shes wrong about all three and instead is met with Klaus seemingly calm and questioning her (though of course she knows if she speaks one bad word against Caroline, Klaus will decapitate her).
"I..I'm here to see Caroline" Honestly she sais it with more conviction than she thought she would and that causes her to stand a smidge taller until she wilts under Klaus's glare.
His glare is full force and she can see the anger in his expression "Finally here to grovel are we then? After weeks of Caroline in tears, of her consumed with unneeded guilt, you better hope she accepts your apology or so help me god I'll drown you as well" He sounds deadly serious and all Bonnie can do is nod as he opens the door for her.
The house if beautiful as she thought it would be and Bonnie knows this is just the kind of place Caroline belongs, amongst the fine things and the Hybrid boyfriend who evil or not, genuinely seems to adore her. It's just the way Klaus looks at Caroline, Bonnie wishes someone..mainly Kol would look at her like that.
"Bonnie?"
That's the voice, the girly distinctive voice Bonnie's missed so god damn much and as she turns around, she can't help but launch herself, wrapping her arms around the best friend she has missed so much. As she hugs Caroline, the tears begin to stream down Bonnie's face as it dawns on her how much she really has missed her. Soon enough they're both crying, giggling and collapsing to the floor in a mixture of limbs and apologies. Klaus rolls his eyes at them and then shoots Caroline a smile before leaving the two to talk, though he does shoot Bonnie a warning look before he heads upstairs.
About half an hour later the two stop crying long enough to talk, Bonnie repeatedly apologizes through the tears and Caroline shoos her down, understanding like she always does. Soon enough Caroline's chatting away about the Mansion and the weekend trip to Paris Klaus took her on and how they are going to Rome next month, it all seems so perfect and Bonnie's just sad she missed being around for it all.
"What about you then Bonnie?" Caroline asks after a thorough catch up on her side of things. Bonnie bites down on her lip (a bad habit shes picked up since meeting Kol) and glances around; it all seems relatively quite but then they're all vampires, so she has to check.
Trying to sound as casual as possible as she speaks Bonnie's gaze flits around once more before she asks "So ermm who's here at the moment?"
Caroline looks confused for a moment but answers anyway with a smile "Just me, you and Nik. Elijah and Rebekah are visiting friends in Canada and Kol is out" She sais it all with a simple smile, though her eyes flash a tad when she mentions Kol. Things go quite for a moment then, but only for a moment.
"I think I'm in love with him!"
She blurts it out before clapping a hand over her mouth, and looking around in shock; it's the first time she's admitted it at all, and now she feels oddly relieved but worried at Carolines very understanding expression.
"I know"
Somehow Bonnie manages to look more shocked as she looks across at Caroline who calmly explains Kol's change of attitude and how she may or may not have asked Nik to follow him at one point or another, she smiles sheepishly then but continues by explaining how much she likes the new Kol and how the two of them should totally get together.
"I don't know Caroline, I mean how can I..?" She stops herself before she sais something insulting about Klaus and instead changes tactic "What made you fall for Klaus? How can you look past all the bad stuff?"
Caroline looks thoughtful for a mere second,and then launches into the full reasoning behind her decision, every word leaving her lips very clearly truthful, if the passion behind them is anything to go by alone.
"Its difficult, at first I thought I could never forgive him or even get past despising him" A chuckle is heard from the next room and Caroline scowls before the click of the door is heard, indicating Klaus has given them both some much needed privacy. "Anyways, yeah I never thought I would be able to get past all that stuff but somehow he changed my view. He began to show me his human side, the side of him thats so pure and so desperate for love that made me want to launch into his arms, he showed me the man he had once been who cared so much for his family, even his Father who despised and tried to continually hurt him, he showed me that man who loves, and I just fell so much for his human side, that the other stuff didn't matter, because it's all a front, the killing and the arrogance its a front for how he just wishes to be loved, and I discovered that"
"Not only that but also I was and always will be his first choice, I will always be the girl that he wants not because he was pushed aside by Elena or had no other options but because he loves me for me, and he accepts every little bit of me, the fact I prefer to drink from blood bags, he does sometimes too...I mean hes not perfect but neither am I, the great thing is we both accept that and grow because of it, he tells me everyday how much he loves my flaws and it makes me feel whole, it makes me happy"
"I love Nik so, so much and not some silly teenage love like I thought I had for Matt and Tyler but a love that makes me whole, the kind of love I think would emotionally break me if I were to lose it, the fact I was willing to become estranged with you, Elena, even Stefan; I love you all so much but I fell for Nik so hard there was no choice, I'm sorry to say it but there never was a choice, I love him beyond belief Bonnie and I can't change that, I don't want to change that ever, and if you've fallen for Kol neither can you"
Bonnie looks shocked for a moment more, as the words sink in. She has to accept them for how sincere Caroline sounds and how her eyes are glistening with tears that could only describe happiness.
The door bursts open then and Bonnie jumps up only to find Klaus at the door with a similar expression to Caroline, she's forgotten then as Klaus runs forward and crushes Caroline to him in a moment that makes Bonnie smile because it's so filled with love. Carolines crying now in Klaus's arms and they're muttering 'I love yous' with a passion the upmost cynic would believe. Clearly he overheard anything, and Bonnie takes that as her cue to leave, leave them to be happy; Caroline deserves that
..and Bonnie's realizing maybe she does too.
Its began hammering down with rain (how fucking cliche) as she walks home hugging her elbows, Carolines words constantly flicking through her head.
'I just fell so much for his human side, that the other stuff didn't matter'
'I was and always will be his first choice'
'There never was a choice'
'I love him beyond belief Bonnie and I can't change that, I don't want to change that ever'
It's so god damn confusing! Her heart and head must have gone fifty plus rounds debating the in's and outs of her relationship with Kol, but she has a feeling that her heart is taking the lead, especially after seeing Carolines expression when Klaus walked back in.
Bonnie knows she wants someone to look at her like that, to gaze at her with so much love you might burst; Bonnie's never had that, but god damn she wants it.
"I heard you and Caroline made up, shes ecstatic. Nik threatened if I even dared to ruin her mood he would dagger me again."
Of course she knows its him as he appears behind her, still looking like a runway model in the rain, his hair plastered to his face, his pale skin shining against the moonlight that merely peeps through the clouds. He looks different somehow, almost hopeful? Though Bonnie could well be imagining that.
When she doesn't reply to him, out of fear she might blurt out her true feelings, he does something, she doesn't know if hes not even aware of what it means to her but it takes her back to the day at the fountain, and when she began to fall, and its perfect. He takes off his jacket (this time leather, she hasn't actually given him back the other one) and wraps it around her shoulders, and then Bonnie knows the decision is made.
"Nik also told me he overheard a little conversation between you and Caroline and I managed to half guess, and half get the contents out of Caroline who can't lie to save her life" He raises an eyebrow at her, and she knows the balls in her court; speak now or forever hold your piece and all that shit.
"Yeah we had a discussion involving Klaus..and you" Bonnie keeps her eyes locked on him, determined this will make them now, she can't be a fucking coward (she doubts he'd allow her either). "I asked her for some advice on you actually" Then her gaze does drop because she can't bring herself to look at him if shes facing rejection.
He doesn't allow that either and uses his thumb to tilt her chin up toward him, the rain trickling down her face could very well be tears, but she refuses to sniff or scrub at them, she doesn't want to cry. His eyes are pleading with her to just come out with it, but as her lips tremble he rolls his eyes and leans down, pulling her toward him.
The kiss isn't like the ones in movies where everything looks perfect, but it doesn't matter because to Bonnie it feels perfect. Its a desperate clash, lips pushing against one another, tongues fighting for dominance, teeth crashing to one another, her nails digging into his neck, and his fingers cluthing at her hips, its so desperate and seems to convey everything neither can say perfectly, and as soon as he pulls away Bonnie wants more.
"Say it" He sais, his hands hold her tight against his chest, and Bonnie feels warm under the rain.
"I..." Bonnie stops, sniffs and her hands fall to his chest, her eyes now once again locked with his. "I love you"
With that his lips fall to hers again, his mumur of 'I love you' as passionate as hers, the rain continues to fall and everythings like a fucking perfect movie that makes Bonnie's heart want to burst.
Its exactly what shes always wanted.
Until Caroline appears next to them both, squealing and pulling them both into a head lock. Nik appears a moment later apologizing that he couldn't stop her (though Bonnie doubts he tried, he is like 50x faster than any other vampire on earth).
Even so somehow that just makes everything even more perfect.
hope you enjoyed:3 bit crazy and a lot of swearing, but c'mon if it were on hbo there would be shit ton more swearing and sex (like tb!)
anyways please check out my other tvd fics! also I know the grammars fucked up but meh I've got work in like 10 minutes.
and as always review and favorite m'lovelies xo