All that trouble for a decent drink

After failing to capture the Avatar, June decided to hang low in some far off corner of the Earth Kingdom. A young Fire Nation officer arrives and offers her a job. He realise it's not that easy convincing her, much to his dismay. One shot.

Lieutenant Sh'in was a graduate from the prestigious Sozin Military Academy, the best military institution in the entire empire, dedicated to the breeding of fine officers and inspirational leaders for the meat grinder. He is a young, clean shaven man of twenty years; handsome and full of piss and fire. He looked especially dashing in the officer's uniform of the Fire-navy.

Immediately, June loathed the man on sight.

Sh'in would probably be the first to lead his men into the breach in a forlorn hope charge...and be the first to be crushed to death on the first wave of an attack. He was the very model of a modern junior officer.

The lieutenant looked uncomfortable being in a place like this. June had to agree with him. As drinking dens go, this place smelled as fresh as an armadillo-rat's rear end and appeared like one too. June didn't mind. How else was a girl supposed to find any decent sink hole in this arse end of civilisation?

He looked around nervously and inched his face closer to hers. "I have heard that your...kind is suitable for a certain task that requires the utmost secrecy," he spoke quietly.

"If you are looking for a whore you're in a wrong place, soldier-boy."

To June's amusement, Sh'in blushed. "T-thats not what I wa-"

Oh boy, she thought, this one would be fun to play with.

She raised a hand to cut him off. "Relax, soldier-boy, I'm just messing with you. I know what you want. You want someone found alive, dead or somewhere in between."

Sh'in looked around nervously. There were about eight patrons in the bar in various stages of intoxication. Including the bar keep and the fat old crone that was the bar keeper's wife there were ten people in the room.

"I think we should go somewhere that is more inconspicuous," the lieutenant whispered. "This is a great matter of state and is entrusted to me by the very highest of authority of the Fire Nation occupational administration. Commander Zhao himself recommended you to-"

"Have you ever had a drink before?" she interrupted him.

"What?"

"Ya' know, getting pissed out of your mind?"

"Ma'am, I have partaken in many-"

"It's June," she interrupted him again. "My name is June. Just call me that. No "ma'am this" or "miss" that. I'm not some high-class whore."

To his credit, Sh'in quickly recovered his composure. "I apologise… June. I have partaken in many ritual observances that involve the consumption of alcohol as it was required of me."

Spirits protect me, June thought. "I mean drinking for fun."

Sh'in looked indignant. "Y-yes, of course I have. I went out with plenty of my fellow classmates from the academy during recreational time. Much fun was had," he laughed to himself. "Oh the things we got up to. Within the limits of academy rules, of course, and we had to get back to our dorms before curfew."

"Good," she grinned. June slammed a great clay jar down in the table. The lieutenant yelped and flinched back, almost jumping out of his seat. "Soldier-boy, I am a simple woman with simple tastes. Right now I want to see you drink."

"What is this?" he asked. He eyed the jar as if it would explode.

"It's baijiu, a local spirit. What's the matter, soldier-boy, never had a real drink before?"

"This is just…unorthodox. This is not how business should be made!"

"Of course it is. Have you never heard of a drink to seal a deal?"

"We haven't even discussed the deal yet!" he exclaimed. He was almost to the point of panic. This was not the way he thought things would turn out.

June felt almost sorry for the young lieutenant. But a week spending in this bar dampened her spirits and her previous bounty proved to be a failure. Luckily, she slipped off before her ex-employers could come around and ask for her down payment back. The Fire Nation nobles, that strange old man and the moody half-faced boy, would have to find another way to hunt down the Avatar.

It just wasn't her business.

The trick with these fire-nation soldiers is to play along with their rampant national pride. Goad them just enough and they'll do just about anything. "Are you a man of the fire-nation, or just a piss-weak milk drinker? I've fought and drank with Earth Kingdom warriors and they put up a tough challenge."

As expected, Sh'in took it all up. The officer puffed up his chest and spoke "I assure you that anything an Earth soldier could do so can an officer of the Fire Nation!"

June grinned slyly. It looked as if it belonged to a shirshu smiling at its next meal. "Prove it."

Sh'in pulled off the lid of the jar and stopped. He looked around the table as if looking for something.

"What are you waiting for?" said June. "Go for it."

"I need a cup or a saucer."

June merely pointed at the clay jar. Sh'in caught on fast. "You want me to drink from the jar, the entire thing?!"

"The entire thing," June smiled. She really was enjoying his reactions.

Sh'in gawped. The jar was big, about the size of a human head. "It's not possible."

"The Earth soldier said otherwise." It was a lie. That Earth soldier was knocked out half-way after he had challenged her to a drinking contest. Unfortunately for him, and fortunately for her, she had switched the jars around so that she was drinking water. Afterwards she quickly ran off on Nyla with the soldier's money before he could find out.

But in her defence, the soldier as well as his squad mates was planning to ambush her regardless if she had won or lost. They just didn't realize that she had planned to cross them first. They also didn't expect a multi-tonne shirshu crashing through the wall. Nyla was currently safely tucked away in the stables, frightening the locals and snacking on the rodents. With a whistle, the shirshu would be on any opponent in moments.

The lieutenant picked up the jar and drank. It tasted foul. Sh'in gagged and almost spilled out the baiju. But he managed to swallow that mouthful. "It tastes like bleach!"

"You can stop anytime; I'm not forcing you to do anything. However, I do not feel confident enough to be hired by someone that, frankly, could not handle their drink." She put on her most serious and business-like voice, "I have a strict code of ethics that I must obey. My honour is my life." She almost laughed at the ridiculousness of that statement.

Sh'in thought back to his lessons. When in doubt, move forward, as he was taught at the academy. To plunge ahead directly into the mouth of hell like the famed General Iroh did at Ba Sing Se. Lieutenant Sh'in emulated his hero and advanced into the breach. And so he drank, and drank. And drank.

His apple bobbed up and down as gulp after gulp of baiju went down his throat. The lieutenant drank deeper and deeper until the jar was tilted over his head. It seemed like it took forever for him to finish. Finally, he slammed down the jar on the table. Sh'in's once clean and crisp uniform was now stained and wet with liquor. The lieutenant swayed back and forth unsteadily.

He was drunk.

"Finish," he slurred. His breath stank.

June stared at the lieutenant with something akin to awe and pity. The lad was going to have a hell of a hangover.

Sh'in's eyes tried to focus on June. "Ooooookay, let-let's get things going." He then thought for a second. "W-what are we talking about again?"

"About my pay for the last bounty," she lied. "I think it's currently a thousand gold taels. I can write down a receipt."

"Y-yes that was- wait, that's not righttttt."

It was worth a try.

"Wwwwaiiiittttt a damn minute," he said, finally figuring it all out. "I was gonna' get you to hunt somebody for my superior. Commander -whatshisname- Zhao had ordered me to find you and to, err, hunt down a fugitive and traitor. Yer', that's right."

Sh'in paused for a while. June expected the lieutenant was about to vomit all over the floor and staining his dashing uniform with his bile. But he swallowed it down, much to her relief.

"Youuuuu know, Zhao really is an arrogant son of a pig-dog. H-h-heeeee sent me all the way out into this arse end of nowhere to get youuuu." He pointed a finger at June and tried his most threating of looks, but his swaying and facial feature was too comical to be serious. "Do youuuu know how h-h-hard it was to-to-to hunt youuuu down? H-h-hunting a bounty hunter!" he laughed at his own joke.

"I expect that it was quite a feat of detective work," she said.

"Yesh it was. I h-had to go allll the way to, err, the colonies. Shitty place if you asked me, middle of nowhere. I-I-I don't even know whyyyyy we 'ave to go all the way out in these blasted Earth lands and conqueror it. The people here are miserable, ugly, stupid and dirt-poor! B-b-but like they say," Shi'in stopped and thought hard to remember what the saying was, "fuck it, I forgot what they said. I think it's for Firelord and country blah blah blah. Anyway, I am sure there is so-so-so social economical whatever as a factor."

Sh'in slumped into his chair, dejected and depressed. "I hate it here. Fuckin' hate this place. The colonies, my comrades, Zhao, the Avatar, the Firelord, everyone! This-this wasn't what they told us when we joined up!" he cried.

This was getting awkward fast. June decided to say something encouraging to the best of her ability. "Well, at least they gave you…your uniform." Everyone likes uniforms, don't they?

"I *hic*actually had to pay for mine out of my salary."

"Oh," she said "good pay?"

"Thirty taels a week for officers pay, just enough to cover for the week's food bill and rent."

"Food?"

He grimaced. "Unspeakable."

"Well…at least it must be glorious being an officer of the winning side?" she tried desperately.

He looked suddenly sober. "Last week me and my platoon ambushed and killed a caravan from Bai Sing Se. We trapped them into a canyon and blasted fire from our benders and finished them off with infantry."

"See, I bet you did well-"

"They were refugees. There were three dozen of them, young and the old, women and children. My first ever kill was a thirteen year old boy coming at me with a stick. Commander Zhao personally congratulated me for valour."

They were silent except the creaking caused by the drunk swaying of Sh'in. Things did get awkward.

"So who is my target?" she said, deciding now was probably a good time to get paid.

Sh'in hiccupped and looked at her with slightly glazed eyes. "What?"

"My target, you know, the reason you came here to this hole?"

"Oh right, that thing." The lieutenant reached inside his uniform and got out a folder and handed to her. "You *hic* can read, right?"

"Yes, I could read," she said.

"Well *hic* thatsallgood," he slurred. "I was worried because I'm suddenly quite tipsy and can't see very well. I don't wanna' read it out."

He tapped the bridge of his nose and said conspiratorially, "State secrets and all that…stuff." He even winked.

June opened up the folder and read the first page. She saw who she was targeting and neatly closed the folder.

"No," she said.

Sh'in looked at her, puzzled. "What *hic* was that?"

"I said I'm not going to do this job."

"Have you read the entire thing? Have you even read the price we are promising you?"

"Yes I have, I can read you know. I even saw the pretty little sketch you did of him, a good likeness by the way, even the tattoos. You really got his good side."

"B-b-but the Commander ordered me to-to-to brings you in to bring him in and-"

His face got bright red and screamed angrily. "BY THE SPIRITS AND MY ANCESTORS, I DRANK ALL THAT FOR YOU!"

He slammed his hands on the table and the jar fell onto the floor which shattered. The bar all looked at the two. June looked at each of them and glared. They promptly stared back down in their drinks.

"Too bad, I didn't guarantee anything when you drank all of that baiju. Read the fine print before signing the document."

"What fine print!? What document!?" he screamed.

She shrugged. "Sorry, soldier-boy."

Sh'in got up and reached for his sword. He got it out in one smooth motion and pointed the blade right in front of June's face.

"I CAME HERE FOR YOU, IN THIS MISERABLE ARSE END OF THE WORLD! I SPENT A WEEK TRACKING YOU!" He screamed it all out and his eyes were filled with angry tears. "I WANT TO GO BACK TO THE FIRELANDS! I WANT TO GO BACK TO MY FAMILY! COMMANDER ZHAO PROMISED ME THIS IF I FIND YOU!"

June stared at the sword. For a drunken man, Sh'in had a good grip and control of his weapon. "I'm flattered that you young ones would go all the way here to get someone as humble as I am." She said this all calmly and with hands folded.

The lieutenant barred his teeth, his body seethed with rage. Perhaps if he wasn't so drunk or perhaps if she had not humiliated him then this confrontation would not be happening. But like the monks say, causality and causation is a bitch.

She whistled.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" he demanded, his sword hand twitching.

"Look, as much as I enjoyed your company, your little drinking bout and the amazing, wonderfully bright and uplifting stories, sometimes a girl just have to go." She smiled at the lieutenant, "I have to leave now, soldier-boy, a girl has a curfew. Just like you did back at your precious academy."

There was a rumble. Everyone looked around. Sh'in thought that the alcohol finally got into him and made him see things but it was all real. The shirshu crashed through the bar wall. He had heard his mistress' distress and came to her rescue. Nyla, that dumb but loyal beast was a multiple tonne monster that destroyed everything in its path. Luckily the patrons got out of his way.

Sh'in just stared at the thing. He actually tried to stand in front of the beast and order it to stop. "I-I-I demand you to get out of-"

Nyla ignored him and came right at Sh'in. Apparently, the shirshu was not particularly fazed by the threat of Fire military law.

To his credit, Sh'in dived into cover. He leapt aside and Nyla just missed him by an inch. June jumped into the saddle and grabbed the reins. "Go, Nyla, show them the meaning of haste!"

Nyla roared and ran out to the wilderness.

Sh'in followed. He ran out and threw fireballs at the retreating figure. It failed to hit anything except some trees and air. He was still dizzy and his aim suffered.

One of the fireballs ignited the sleeve of his uniform. The baiju made the cloth flammable and Sh'in had to tear it off before it spread to his skin.

He stared at the retreating figure, now way out of his range. Sh'in crumpled down the ground and screamed.

"FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK!" he yelled up to the heavens. He yelled at all the realms of the celestial world. He cursed loudly and colourfully hoping that the spirits and his ancestors would hear and grind down that bitch and make her rue the day she crossed Sh'in.

No one answered. Nor did he expect anyone to do so. Luck pissed at him at a regular basis.

Then a voice called out to him. It was not that of a spirit or a revered ancestor. "Excuse me, but are you going to pay for – well – everything?"

Sh'in glared at the inn keeper. The look was from one that was on the brink of a violent breakdown. "Err, actually, here's the bill here for the jar of baiju and the damages. You don't have to pay for her tab and accommodation. You can pay anytime." He threw down the bill and ran back to the inn.

He looked back at where June escaped. Drunk, dirty, wet, and with one sleeve, Sh'in did not resemble anything like a model junior officer of the Fire-navy.

He got up, unsteadily. He promised himself that he would hunt her down for making a mockery out of him. He did not understand her reason for not accepting that job, but he cared not. He was Lieutenant Sh'in of the Fire Nation, and he will have his revenge.

It was this time that the alcohol finally took effect. He then promptly threw up and collapse onto the dusty ground on his own vomit.

It really was an unlucky day for Sh'in.

/

Epilogue

June rode through the swampy lands of the frontiers between the Fire colonies and the Earth Kingdom. She felt somewhat guilty at what she did to the lieutenant. Perhaps she should've said something like explained to him why she did not accept that job. Perhaps the lieutenant would've understood and stood down and left so she would enjoy the dreadful place without disturbance.

Hunting Avatar Aang again was not something she would do, for any amount. She tried with that old man and his half-face nephew of his. That was why she will not do it, as the lieutenant and Commander Zhao demanded of her.

But like the old monks say, hindsight is a crystal clear vision. Those monks should know, after all, they had all their long and saggy lives to remind themselves what they could've done in hindsight, like whoring away instead of studying dusty air-nomad parchments.

She moved on. She had heard rumours that some aristocrat, apparently the Firelord's daughter was looking for someone. Who knows? Perhaps she would need the help of a bounty hunter?

End