The first time, it was a total surprise. To look across the room and feel that spark inside him. Sure, it had happened before with girls. But never like this. Never with this girl. And even though Ryder was straight, just the fact that he was checking out a girl like this…well…it kind of begged the question.

Was he straight or wasn't he? And should it really matter?

No, of course not. There were things way more important than getting all emo about who he was attracted to. Like making grades. Like graduating. Like college, so he wouldn't wind up poor and struggling like his own parents way before he was even born.

Still, he caught himself looking…and reacting…and it would be fine if she were like all the other girls. But Unique is…unique. She's her and he's a dude, and the truth is, it's hard to think of her like that when she's still forced to use the boy's bathroom. Even though (and Ryder's been there for this) some jock assholes told her that if she ever tried, they'd cut it off. Same goes in the boy's locker room after gym. When it's for a sport, Ryder can count on Sam or Artie or Jake (at least he used to be able to count on him. Now, Jake just seems kind of pissed at Ryder all the time.) to look out for Unique. But it's not that way after gym.

After gym, she hides in the bathroom stall and changes there, and Ryder can't imagine waking up tomorrow and having the body of a girl, and the brain of a guy. It would be more than a little depressing. He can understand Unique wanting to dress the way she feels inside. But it's still way confusing to admit to himself that he might like her, like her.

For a while, he tried to convince himself that he liked Marley. It was easier that way. But no girl was worth Ryder's grades and definitely not his self-respect. He was a lover, not a fighter, and so, how the hell he wound up in a superhero costume kicking Jake's ass and shoving him around, Ryder will never know. And he's done with that part of his life. He needs to do better for himself. It's not that Marley's a bad person, it's that going after her like this is making him one. Besides, he couldn't really deny his feelings on this. Needless to say, kissing Marley on Valentine's Day had been one of the dumbest things Ryder could remember doing, and that was saying something.

So, now, Ryder does what he's best at. He researches. Which, for him, means watching tons of YouTube videos. He does it with Unique the first time, asking her once, after everyone had left what it was called.

"What's what called? Boy, you gotta be more specific or Unique won't know what in the world you're talking about."

"Uh…to be like you? When your brain and your body… You know… When they don't match. What is that?"

"I'm not a fan of labels," Unique says crossing her arms. "And I'm not a fan of morbid curiosity or bein' laughed at behind Unique's beautiful back. Are we clear?" She had stepped close to him then, and Ryder could smell her perfume.

"You smell good," he couldn't help telling her, and Ryder felt his body tense. Expecting what? A bolt of lightning to strike? And was this what Unique felt like every day? Because, holy crap, it would take a strong person to live every day, expecting people to hate you. It wasn't the same. It was way worse for her. But the taste of how she might feel was enough to make him wonder.

"What you're smelling is Sweet Honesty by Avon. My mother's perfume from the 1970's," she amended, taking her phone out of her purse and sitting down, patting the chair beside her.

"Vintage. Awesome," Ryder grinned. Maybe perfume was like wine and it got better with age. In which case, this perfume had about forty years of awesome in it.

"I'm gonna show you some videos. You all right with that? They'll explain it better than I can."

"Yeah, whatever you can tell me is great. I just want to understand, you know?" he said, because it was true.

That was the beginning. Ryder watched way more videos when he got home. It made sense to think of the obvious thing that made Unique biologically a guy as a birth defect. It made sense to let people like Unique live and dress the way they felt the most comfortable.

It made sense, but Ryder still couldn't quite shake that bad case of nerves he got around her. More than nerves, though. Fear. Because Ryder knew from hearing stories some of the juniors and seniors in New Directions told, especially from Blaine, that if Ryder associated himself romantically with Unique, he would be painting a huge target on his own back.

He couldn't talk to his parents about this. I mean, sure, they were accepting enough, but there were some things they weren't going to get, no matter what Ryder said. His sister? Maybe he could talk to her. Rosie was pretty cool, and she was the first one to give him advice about how to get a girl to like him. Ryder had been eight. Always a little ahead of the curve there, and so behind in every other way.

To this day, Ryder remembered, and practiced what Rosie suggested. Now, he wasn't even conscious of it. And he didn't do it to get noticed, or to get liked, but because it just seemed like the right thing. Part of being a decent human being. He was polite. He was helpful. And he tried to take an interest in what they were interested in.

So, maybe, he'd start there with Unique, too.

That night, after spending hours on homework, and not being able to sleep, even though it was almost 1 AM, he ripped out sheet of notebook paper, deciding that if Unique liked things old school, he'd go old school for her. Writing had never been his thing, but this, he could do.

He spent the next hour sketching a totally amazing three-dimensional vase, overflowing with every flower Ryder had ever seen.

The next day, he slid the folded paper between the slats in Unique's locker. He'd been a coward and left the drawing unsigned, but waited, holding his breath until glee practice. Would she mention it to Marley or any of the other girls? Or would Ryder's anonymous efforts be for nothing?

Unique didn't say anything about the picture that day, and Ryder tried not to be disappointed. He didn't want to come off like a creepy stalker, so he didn't leave her anymore pictures for the rest of the week, hoping Unique still didn't have her eye on Jake. That would totally complicate things. Besides which, Jake already pretty much wanted to kick Ryder's ass for some unknown reason. Whenever Ryder even tried to talk to him, Jake just glared and walked the other way.

It was weeks before he got the courage to catch her eye. To smile at her. To risk the chance that she would blow him off completely.

She didn't though.

Unique smiled back.

And Ryder felt awesome. And terrified, too. Because if anyone saw them flirting in the middle of glee club what would they do?

Blaine and Sam call for a break in rehearsing the '90s boy band feud mashup that resulted because Finn and Mr. Schuester were behaving like Ryder and Jake had - fighting over Emma - just like they had fought over Marley. As far as Ryder was concerned, Blaine and Sam could go on leading the club for sure. They were serious about the music, but not too serious.

The girls were all watching, and giggling behind their hands. Unique had yet to take her eyes off Ryder, and that made him feel this weird combination of flattered and awkward. Most girls weren't so bold. Then again, most girls weren't Unique.

"Hey," Blaine said, nodding at him. "You doing okay with the lyrics?"

"Yeah. Listen, I need to ask you something," Ryder said, his voice just above a whisper.

"Sure. Sam," Blaine called. "Take over for a bit?"

"Yeah, no problem, bro," Sam answered, and Ryder walked out while Sam was walking the rest of the guys through choreography.

"So, what's up?" Blaine asked, bracing himself on the closed glee room door.

"I like this girl," Ryder blurted.

Blaine smiled a little. "Maybe I'm not the correct person for you to talk to about this…" he ventured.

"No, yes! Yes, you are. Okay. Because. And I just… I mean, I can't…" Ryder tried. He hated when he got so tongue-tied. It used to happen all the time when he was a kid. Something else Ryder was learning was connected to his dyslexia. His thinking with images, not words. There weren't words for this. If he could draw Blaine that perfect vase of flowers and sketch Unique's face on the back of the drawing, Ryder was sure Blaine would get it.

Ryder made himself stop and take a breath. He was glad Blaine was just waiting, not making a huge deal out of his. "I need you," he said deliberately, "to tell me what to do. Don't think of it in terms of guy-girl. Think of it just as two people, all right? We like each other. And I want to take it to the next level. You know…talk to her…"

Blaine smirked a little at that, but he was silent, listening.

"…but I don't want to make things any harder for her… I can take it but she shouldn't have to."

"How would your talking to her make things more difficult for her?" Blaine asked, curious.

"It'd.." Ryder shrugged. "Draw attention, I guess. People already don't like her very much."

"You're talking about Unique," Blaine commented softly.

Ryder swallowed and nodded. "Yeah. And I mean, maybe I should've talked to Finn about it."

Blaine bristled and shook his head. "No."

"No?"

"You know he outed Santana last year, don't you?" Blaine asked quietly, point blank.

Ryder's mouth fell open. Santana Lopez had been Marley's mentor earlier this year. She had an intense personality, but she had been the first to discover the laxatives in Marley's bag. She'd been brutally honest, which Ryder appreciated. Bottom line? No one deserved that. Everyone deserved to be able to love whoever they wanted, and share who they were when they were ready.

"I can't believe Finn would do that…" Ryder shook his head. "He's the one who said Unique could play Rizzo in Grease."

"He has his moments," Blaine allowed. "Listen, Unique and I aren't in the same boat, per say. But I can understand your concern. I won't lie to you, it will be hard. Kurt was bullied viciously here, and faculty didn't do anything to stop it. I'm not saying don't act on your feelings for her, but I'm saying be smart about it. Speak with her privately and see how she feels about it. If you do go forward, and end up dating, know that some people will be absolutely fine with it. But some won't. And it's those who aren't that you need to be ready for."

"All right. Thanks," Ryder nodded, feeling overwhelmed.

He hung around after glee practice, catching Unique's eye and nodding. Just like he thought, she hung back, until everyone had left.

"I love the flowers," she confessed.

"How'd you know they were from me?" Ryder asked, blushing.

"No one I know is an artist, except for you."

"Ah," Ryder bit his lip. "So…I like you."

"But…" she said, her face falling.

"No 'but.' I just wanted to know. Are you okay with this? The flirting? The flowers? I don't wanna make things worse for you."

"Honey, my whole life's a challenge. If you wanna bring some good to it, who am I to say no to that?"

Still, they both eyed the window in the classroom door, to be sure no one was walking past, before Ryder leaned in close, and very gently, kissed her cheek.

To be continued…