Hey everyone! This is going to be a multiple chapter fic, I've wanted to do this for ages so now you're blessed with this! Based off of Alice in Wonderland, I've simply thrown the Akatsuki into the fray as the important characters with Deidara and Sasori leading the charge since they are my favourites and I enjoy writing them. Updates may be frequent at the start but may slow down, as I have exams in two weeks so I'm very busy.

Now Sasori! Disclaimer if you please!

Sasori: But the brat's the main character...
Authoress: Just do it Puppet boy!
Sasori: *sigh* Chasing doesn't own the Akatsuki or any of the Alice in Wonderland characters. All rights go to their respective owners and creators.
Authoress: Now was that so hard? Of course not!

Enjoy!

Deidara couldn't remember the last time he had been so horrifically bored on a mission. Normally, he was pretty darn good at entertaining himself, whether by flying around, sculpting on the go or pissing off his partner Sasori, his ability to preoccupy himself was borderline uncanny. But today, his lack of attention span was plaguing him with a vengeance.

Recon had never been his strong point, regardless of him being extremely well equipped for it; the fact that he possessed the attention span of a brick never helped. He sort of just winged it (literally) figuring that if something was off, Sasori would notice or it would be so big, he couldn't miss it. He stopped under a dense tree next to a small river, trying to figure out how far he was from the base. He had been out for most of the morning with Sasori, hanging around the forest which held one of the Akatsuki's several bases around the hidden continent.

Speaking of Sasori, the blonde began to wonder where he was. Expanding his chakra, he searched around a bit, hoping to pinpoint him somewhere in the general vicinity. After a few moments of searching, he found his partner's chakra emitting from a location a few miles west of him.

'May as well go link up un,' he thought to himself, creating a bird and hopping onto the back of his clay creation. He always enjoyed flying, the feeling of the wind whipping through his hair, that sense of freedom that came with leaving the ground, severing all ties and soaring away from your problems; it was almost poetic, if Deidara had any patience for poetry. Words that stay couldn't ever be true art after all.

Spotting the bulky mass of black and red shuffling along on the ground, Deidara swooped down, circling a few times before landing the beast with expert precision and an unnatural elegance for such a sizable creature.

"Hey Danna," he called, reconnecting with the forest floor, "Are we almost done yet? I'm getting kinda hungry and nothings out here un."

Hiruko swung around awkwardly, metal tail coiled menacingly as Sasori glared at the blonde, although he couldn't see it.

"We will go back when we have finished searching every inch of this forest," he replied coldly, "If you have completed your portions, wait here for me. I still have a few miles to check."

The blonde scoffed a little, dropping himself against the base of a wide, knotted tree as he glared at his partner.

"Thought you hated to keep people waiting un!" he uttered dryly, raising his visible eyebrow in an air of smug conviction, "Why don't you lose the ugly puppet and you'll move a lot faster."

Sasori growled, the metal tail flexing threateningly above the hunched shell. Deidara always knew where to strike to evoke reactions, and he enjoyed doing it. Something the puppeteer despised about him, especially when his favourite puppet was involved.

"You would do well to show some respect Deidara," he growled, spitting out the name like something foul, "You know what this puppet can do; especially after the number of times I've had to waste my antidotes on you."

Deidara scowled, rolling his visible eye and waving a hand dismissively. The tongue didn't fail to poke cheekily out of his palm mouth, succeeding in irking the redhead even more, tail twitching, contemplating the worth of losing more poison to his bratty partner.

"Yeah right, that was twice Danna," he snapped, "And once was for nothing un! Maybe I accidently breathed within your general vicinity? Well, apologies for being human."

The blonde had perhaps five seconds to roll away from the poisoned jab that smashed at the tree trunk directly where his heart had been. A fire lit behind his azure pools, a defiant pleasure that came only from pushing people to the edge of their patience and over it.

Deidara was crouched several metres away from the now seething puppet master, a wide smirk twisting his face, one hand poised and ready to grab clay if he needed it. Wordlessly, Hiruko retracted its tail from the shattered wood, curling it back onto itself, reflecting an edgy scorpion. Sasori turned his puppet around and lumbered away, leaving Deidara alone in the clear with his rapid heartbeat.

"Un," he grumbled, letting his form flop to the ground and into a more comfortable position. He realised, sitting on the rather uncomfortable ground, that he was bored again, his fun having been brief and only slightly satisfying.

He leaned against the now broken tree, careful of any splinters that could cut him since they would be coated in poison. Once settled, he began to sculpt anything that came to mind. He must have zoned out as when he focused back in on his creation, a small white rabbit was nestled in his artistic hands. Frowning a little, he went to squash it into something new, when a flash of white came into view.

A rabbit, much like the sculpture and darted out from some bushes. It stood on its hind legs, staring at him with glinting violet eyes. It would have reminded him of Hidan, if it weren't for the pink floral waistcoat and golden pocket watch. Deidara narrowed his eyes slightly at the odd sight, deciding to check it out; after all he was on recon and anything out of the ordinary was supposed to be investigated. This seemed to count towards that.

Getting to his feet swiftly, the blonde crept closer to the rabbit, clay at the ready. The rabbit turned its head and with a distasteful look, began to speak.

"You're hardly a fucking ninja!" it snapped grumpily, "You're so damn loud, I coulda heard you a fucking mile away!"

Deidara started; the damn thing sounded like Hidan!

"Yeah, well you're a fucking rabbit un!" he snapped, stomping closer to it. The rabbit snickered and scampered off into the underbrush of the forest. Deidara scowled, racing after it, hot on its heels.

"Where did you go un?" he muttered aloud, extremely pissed off that a rodent could give him the slip.

"Over here you stupid fuck!" it shouted, thumping its hind leg on a log. The blonde raced over just in time to see it scurry down a large rabbit hole, situated at the base of a fallen tree, with dirt piled around it. The blonde leaned in to see if he could see the stupid little rat.

As he leaned forward, something slammed into his back, winding him and sending him head first down the rabbit hole. With a yell, he realised he was falling down much farther than a rabbit hole should go. Squeezing his eyes shut, he waited for the pain of the sudden stop at the bottom, a small murmur in the back of his mind wondering if Sasori would even think to look for him down a rabbit hole.

More to come! I just need to type the first chapter up. Hope you like the idea and stay tuned!