Hello everyone, and welcome to my sequel to Changes of a Lifetime. I am so glad you made it here and super excited about this new story. I just love writing it. The first part takes place in December of 2010, most of the story will take place in March 2011, which has to do with our good friend Ian Doyle. This might sound really weird, but I just love that character. Whoever created him was a genius, other than the fact that he killed (or tried to) Emily. This story shows how Emily deals with Doyle in my alternative world, with her little daughters and husband at home.

Thanks to Lovelover123 for reviewing this new project and helping me with ideas. You are fabulous! Happy Saturday.

Criminal Minds is not mine or a lot of things would be very different. However the little Morgan girls are totally mine!

Shadows of the Past

The past cannot be changed but the future is still unwritten.
-Jennifer S. Benson

Camp 22, North Korea

There was a guard change at midnight. It had been that way since he had first arrived and he had known that was his one chance to escape, if he ever had one. The Koreans had kept him locked up the first six years. They knew that he was more than capable to escape and most of the guards and higher ranks had been informed of his history. That had changed. By now, he was just one of the many prisoners that were officially off the grid. Somehow, he had managed to get into the group that was less guarded. After they had shown him the pictures of his dead son, he had given them some irrelevant information: A few places where weapons were hidden. Nothing important that could hurt Liam in doing his job. Ian had assumed his friend would have taken care of the important places right now.

Once the torture was over, they had started to use him as a worker. It was hard work every day, but he also got a little bit more of freedom. Occasionally some official came in and they would press him for some more information, but eventually they gave up, since he had the valid point of not running the business anymore. He didn't tell them that he had given Liam strict instructions about how to handle situations like this before he had been arrested. He knew where to find his partner and he would get his revenge, once he was out of this place.

He pressed his body against the woodshed and carefully balanced every step he made to avoid any kind of sound. He had to make it on one of the transporters that had been checked already and were just waiting for the paperwork. He stood quietly watching the guards. A few more minutes and the guards would take their places as drivers and leave the camp. He watched as the new group came out exchanging some words in Korean. The drivers got into their cabs, while the other man started to take their position at the gates. He crept closer to the trucks. Carefully calculating every step, he was making. Prisoners weren't supposed to make it in this part of the camp, but that hadn't stopped him. It had taken him long enough to get into the lower security area, where those prisoners were held that no longer had any valuable information. When the first engine roared, he jumped out of his hiding spot and ran over to the back of a different vehicle. He waited for that one to start up, before he climbed into the back and went in to take cover behind one of the big barrels. The truck started moving a few seconds later, leaving the campground and making its way into the miles long cleared nowhere land. The reason why nobody escaped the prison was the open ground, which took too long to cross without any cover. He had seen quite a few men trying, through his years here, but the only one who had returned was still too valuable to shoot and had regretted his escape for many months until he had finally died, during one of the torturing sessions.

The ride was long and besides the regular bumping of the uneven road, Ian allowed himself to doze off. It was not until he could hear the leaves and branches hit the roof of the truck that he got up again. He had to get off, before they made their destination and he had no idea where that would be. He carefully removed part of the back cover and glanced outside. All he could see was the jungle and the road. No other vehicle behind them, to be sure no other truck would suddenly speed up and come, he kept looking through his little hole until he felt safe. He then positioned himself for a jump whenever it seemed a good time. As his feet finally hit the ground, he hurried up and escaped into the covering trees. He didn't stop running until he was in far enough to be unseen by the road, but could still make it out and follow it back to the next village. It would be a long time until he made it back to civilization, but he was determined to find the people who had done this to him. The camp's conditions hadn't been much better and he had learned to survive on the bare minimum. Now it was the time to use that knowledge. A dangerous grin came to his lips, as he fought his way through the jungle and began to plan his revenge.

Washington D.C.

Emily suddenly sat up in her bed taking in deep breaths. Her eyes were checking the whole room for signs of any intruders. Not until she could see the whole room through the dim moonlight, her breathing calmed down.

"Everything alright, Love?"

Emily about jumped out of her skin at the unexpected voice next to her. She turned around in a hurry to check if it was really the person the voice should belong to. Derek sat up at her sudden turning.

"Nightmare?"

His hand wandered to her back to calm her, as she nodded slowly with her eyes wandering through the room again to make sure her nightmare hadn't become real. Finally, she threw the blanket back and got out of bed.

"Where are you going?" Derek was tired from the case he had just finished and wanted nothing more than his wife snuggled up next to him, but she seemed to have other plans.

"Checking on the girls."

"I don't hear any crying."

She shrugged and walked out of the room without responding. She hurried into Avery's room first, but through the light of the nightlight she could see her oldest fast asleep. Emily stepped closer to the little princess bed and moved the blanket further up to cover her daughter's shoulder and most of the duck in her arms.

Careful not to wake her up, she then closed the door behind her again and went to Emma's room. The little girl was a little over 15 months now and just started to discover more of the world, running on her tiny feet. She was now asleep in her big sister's old bed. Emily smiled when she saw the little feet tucked under her belly. A way Avery used to sleep in as well, but their mother just couldn't see how it was even possible to sleep like that. Again she moved the blanket up, knowing it would soon be gone again, as the girl would shake it off in her sleep.

She closed the door behind herself and went to the third and last bedroom. When she leaned over the crib, wide-open, brown eyes greeted her.

"Hi Baby." She carefully placed her arms around the little body and lifted her youngest out of the bed. With the newborn safely in her arms, she made her way over to the rocking chair. Baby Katelynn Fran was just a little over a month old, but to Emily's relief so much easier to take care of than her older sister was. She rarely cried without a real reason, while Emma had just used any occasion to let everyone know that she was awake.

Emily carefully traced the little features of the face. Neither Derek nor she had planned on this little girl. They had talked about having another one eventually, but she had had her hands full with the two daughters they already had and was planning to start teaching a few hours every week at the Academy to get out of the house for a while. Only a few weeks after her first lecture, she had found out that she was pregnant again. Although she had not been in the field this time, she had given up her hours once she had hit seven months. Derek hadn't even said a word this time, but she was too exhausted running after Avery and Emma, who had just discovered walking at that time.

While still staring at her little girl, she moved her nightgown so Katie could eat, since they were both up anyway. The girl was usually quite hungry and today was no different. After the girl was done eating she faded off to sleep, leaving her mother to do some more thinking. The nightmare that haunted her hadn't been around in quite a while. Seven years ago, they had come quite frequently involving a little blonde boy. It was the first time that her daughters had shown up in this dream, as she hadn't had the dream in a few years. She had always felt safe when she was with Derek and had made sure that a complex alarm system in the house kept them safe while he was gone.

"Are you going to come back to bed?" She jumped again at his voice and it didn't go unnoticed by her husband. Katie in her arms moved as well, startled by the sudden movement. Emily put her hand on the small belly and with soft strokes calmed the baby back down. It didn't take her long to fall asleep again and Em decided it was time to move her into her bed.

Derek watched her close the door, before he spoke up. "You are awfully jumpy."

She looked at him. For the shortest moment, the thought of telling him everything crossed her mind, but then she remembered her oath and how Doyle was locked up somewhere in Russia, as she thought. There was no reason for her to have him worry about something that was so far in the past.

"Some nightmares are just too vivid." She felt him follow her back to the bedroom.

"Want to talk about it?"

Emily shook her head as she sat down on the bed: "Just hold me, that's all I need."

She didn't have to say that twice, he settled into bed next to her and opened his arms for her to snuggle into them. Once his arms surrounded her, she indeed felt better. He always made her feel safe, which was the main reason why she had enjoyed working with him. No matter what happened, he always seemed to be there to have her back. She didn't even have to check; she just knew that he was there.

"I didn't hear you come home." She finally stated.

"I came in after midnight and you were out of it."

"Your daughters keep me busy."

He chuckled quietly: "Hotch said if we finished the paperwork, we could stay home tomorrow."

She looked up at him: "I suppose that is you telling me that I also have to clean up your mess tomorrow?"

Derek moved his hand to his face, pretending to slap himself for her unwelcoming reaction, before correcting her with a grin: "That would be me telling you that I will help clean after the girls tomorrow and then I will take you out on a date."

"While the girls entertain themselves…"

"I already talked to Penelope. She and Kevin will come over around bedtime and have their movie night here."

"You are allowing those two in our living room, while my daughters are asleep in the same house?"

"Oh come on. It's not like they would do anything like that here in the first place and we are not exactly innocent either."

Emily smirked, before laying her head back on his chest.

"Well I suppose I could find that black dress in the closet and see if it still fits me."

He laughed at her indication of being fat, which she kept bringing up at any occasion. He couldn't really see what her problem was. Yes, she had gained some weight, but she had also had two babies within the last year and a half, so it seemed reasonable to him. He could feel her breathing steady, as she was falling asleep again and closed his eyes as well.

Just before she drifted off to sleep completely, she spoke again: "Can you do me a favor?"

"Hmm?" He didn't go through the trouble of opening his eyes or speaking.

"You can call me about everything, but don't call me Love."

His eyebrow rose: "Why is that?"

He whispered back, but she didn't respond, as she had drifted off to sleep for a few more hours. Derek opened his eyes, and looked down at her peacefully sleeping. It still seemed surreal to him how he had gotten lucky enough to be able to marry a wonderful woman like Emily. He knew that she didn't agree with him on that, but for him she was all he wanted and way more than he deserved. He fell asleep with his hand lightly brushing over her back.

Their awakening was rather abrupt as every morning, with Katie crying to be fed and possibly changed. Emily freed herself from his arms, but he pulled her back to steal a kiss from her.

"You wouldn't leave your poor husband without a kiss, right?"

She shook her head with a small smile, before leaning in for another kiss.

"You wouldn't leave your poor daughter starving, right?" Emily finally asked back, as he was still not letting go of her a few kisses later. "And wake the other two up with the heart breaking crying?"

"I suppose, I could share." Derek kissed her again, before sitting up himself and letting her go. He watched her hurry out of the room and smiled at the motherly person she had turned into. When she was out of his sight, he got out of bed himself and walked to the other bedroom. Emma was standing in her crib, rubbing her hands over the still tired eyes.

"Hi Emy." She reached her hands out to him and seconds later wrapped her arms tightly around his neck. "Did you sleep well?"

He could feel her snuggle back up against his neck, ready to sleep some more. Derek smiled, before heading next door, where his oldest was sleeping. He loved waking her up, after he had been gone for a few days. It made the morning more special to both of them. He carefully set Emma down on the floor and pointed towards some of the toys covering the ground. She glanced at him for a moment, but then wandered off to grab a stuffed animal from the floor.

Derek shook his head, before he put his attention on Avery. He knelt down next to the small bed and had his fingers wander up and down the little back. It took a while for the girl to stir, but finally she started moving, clearly shaking off the sleep.

"Are you going to wake up and give Daddy a hug?" He asked softly and his voice was all it took her to open her eyes.

"Daddy!" She jumped from her bed right in his arms. He sat on the ground for a while holding her, while she fully awoke. They both watched as Emma was running after a ball she had gotten to roll.

"Were you good for mommy?"

Avery nodded as fast as she could to convince him, before getting off his lap and walking back to her bed to grab her duck. Now that her favorite toy was secure in her arms, she sat back down on her dad and snuggled close to him.

They sat like that for quite a while, him watching his other daughter, while Avery kept telling him about all the important things he had missed. She was just telling him how there was a new picture on the fridge, just for him, when Emily's voice interrupted her.

"Emma, come here Sweetie." She opened her arms and caught the little girl in her arms to take her back to her own room to get her changed and ready for the day. When Derek turned to face her, he was surprised to see her dressed already.

"That was fast." He remarked.

"Well someone stole a huge chunk of my time today to go on this date so I need to get ahead of myself."

Derek laughed, before he moved Avery off his lap: "How about you show me what to wear today."

The little girl ran off to one of the cupboards and pointed to the top of it: "I decided last night with Mommy."

"Oh you did?" He walked over to the dresser and got the little girl dressed before meeting his wife and other daughters in the kitchen for breakfast.