Disclaimer - Characters are not mine. I just like playing with them and will return them to their rightful owner soon.

Just a one-shot based on the song Centerfold by the J. Geils Band . A Merry Man makes a startling discovery that changes his life. No character bashing and it's a Steph/MM paring. Rating is for language and adult situations.

Angel is a Centerfold

If I have to sit in this damn cubical staring at the three walls any longer, I might go crazy. I got injured on a take down a few days ago, so I was confined to office work until I healed. Fucking skip. I hate office work. My ass is asleep and my eyes feel like they're going to bug out of my head.

Les comes running over to my cubical with a beyond excited look on his face. He either has really good plans tonight or something good happened.

"Cal, guess what?" Fuck, I hate guessing games.

"I don't know...you've got a threesome lined up with Filipino twins?" I laughed as his eyes glazed over. He shook his head from the images I planted.

"No, no, no. Not that...that wouldn't be amazing, but this is better." Now I was curious. It had to be good for Les to put it above a twin sandwich with him as the meat.

"What could be better than that?"

"My great-uncle Guido died." He smiled big. He's happy about his uncle dying. He is a sick twisted fuck.

"What? And that makes you happy?" I looked at him incredulously.

"Yeah. I didn't really know him so I'm not all torn up about it. BUT...my dad told him all about me and it seems that he was a player like me. He never married and never had kids. He left me something in his will." Now I was understanding his excitement. Maybe Les was turning into a millionaire. Not that he wasn't already. We just didn't advertise how much money we made.

"Well what did he leave you? All of his money? His giant houses in five different countries? Boats? Cars? What?" His smile grew and he shook his head.

"Something even better." Now what would be better? What was going on in his twisted mind?

"I'm lost. Tell me what he left you before I pound your face in for wasting my time." Les rolled his eyes at my threat. Huh, maybe I'm losing my touch. My tattoo alone is enough to scare people.

"Quit whining you big baby. I'll tell you." Les got real close to me, like he was telling me a national secret. He looked around to see if anyone else was around. What a dork.

"He left me his entire Playboy collection. He had every issue ever printed and they're all in pristine condition." My mouth dropped open. That was impressive and I could understand, now, that Les found this more exciting than money or cars. He really is a horn-dog.

"That's awesome, man. Congratulations." What else do you say to something like that? I've never been one to look at women in magazines. I prefer the real thing and paper just isn't real.

Les was bouncing on his feet. He really was excited. "You want to go with me to pick up the boxes?" Ewww. That doesn't sound fun at all, but it would get me out of the office. Damn straight.

"Sure. Let me tell Steph and Tank that I'm leaving." He nodded and ran off toward the stairs. I knew he would be waiting for me in the garage.

Steph, my angel, started working here full-time about six months ago. We all watched her train her ass off and pass the entrance tests with flying colors. I've never been so proud of her. Since my partner moved to the Boston office, she asked me to be her partner. I jumped at that opportunity. It meant that I got to spend time with her.

I'm just about completely in love with the woman. I have been since she first started coming around the office. She is unlike any woman I have ever met and she doesn't even know how amazing she is. She thinks that she is average at best. She doesn't know that every guy at RangeMan wants to ask her out.

Her and Morelli called it quits for good when she agreed to work here full-time. He didn't trust her around us and wanted her to choose. She chose us and left him in the dust. She never looked back and we were all so proud of her. It made us love her more.

After her and Morelli called it quits, Ranger moved to Miami. We all thought he would finally step up and make her his, but he ran like a coward. It broke her heart when he left, but she moved on. She worked hard training and focused on kicking our asses in the ring. She recently started dating again and is seeing some accountant that Connie introduced her to. It's only been a couple of dates, but she seems happy.

Her and I talk all the time while were out working. She quickly became my best friend and the only woman I have ever loved. I will never tell her about my feelings because I'm too scared. Pathetic, I know. But why would someone like her have feelings for me? She is so far out of my league that it's not funny. I'm satisfied being her friend.

I found her in her cubical doing searches. She almost looked as bored as I felt. Since she was my partner, I wanted to tell her that I was leaving the office for a while.

"Hey Angel. Just wanted to let you know that I'm heading out on a personal errand with Lester." She turned and smiled her bright smile at me. My heart skipped a beat.

"Okay. I'm almost done here so I might head home early. Thanks for letting me know." God she was so beautiful.

"Anytime. I'll see you tomorrow." I dropped a kiss on her out of control curls and walked to Tank's office. He knew why I was there before I even spoke.

"Already talked to Santos. You guys have fun." He didn't even bother looking up from the piles of paperwork. I laughed and turned toward the elevator.

Les was waiting impatiently in his Escalade. It was parked perfectly so all I had to do was step off the elevator and open the damn door.

"Let's do this, man. I can tell you're going to be busy with Mrs. Palm and her five sisters tonight." Les wiggled his eyebrows and smiled at me. We drove to the lawyer's office in complete silence. Les was radiating excited energy. Just like a kid on Christmas.

Three hours later, we were both in Les' RangeMan apartment knee-deep in old Playboy magazines. Les was in Heaven and I was uncomfortable. Looking at half-naked women with another man in the same room was not a good idea. I will admit that some of these issues are pretty amazing.

Seeing the change in what was considered 'hot' over the years was interesting. The centerfold girls that they used in the 50's and 60's look nothing like the ones used today.

I was sorting my way through a box labeled 2000's when I came across an interesting issue. It was titled Girls of Summer 2003. I have no clue what drew me to this issue. The girl on the cover wasn't that attractive. I think it could have been the 'Proud to be an American' centerfold advertisement. I thought, what the hell. I may as well give it a gander.

When I turned to the special centerfold layout and let the pages fall. I looked at the woman and the blood running through my veins turned ice-cold. I knew this girl. I didn't just know her...my angel is this centerfold.

There, on the three pages, was Stephanie Plum spread out in all her beautiful glory. She was way younger, like maybe 22 or 23, but it was my angel. Her eyes were still the same ice blue and her hair was still as crazy as it is now.

She was positioned on her back on a bed. Her back was arched, making her bare breasts point to the heavens. Her bottom bits were only covered by a red, white and blue scrap of underwear. One hand was resting just underneath the top band of that underwear. Any guy could use his imagination and make that hand go further. Her other hand was resting on the bed, holding the matching bra. It was an amazing picture. They captured Steph's beauty and innocence.

The rest of the layout was her in different poses wearing different degrees of nothing. In some of the shots, she used a red, white and blue towel to cover the most intimate area. I noticed that she never fully exposed herself and in each shot, she held a look of innocence on her face. That look on her face made me hard enough to split diamonds. She still has that look even years later.

My favorite picture of her was her facing away from the camera. She was in impossibly high heals that made her legs look amazing. You couldn't help running your eyes up and down those luscious legs. She wore a tiny thong, so her gorgeous ass was on display for all to see. Her arms were wrapped around her chest and she held a lollipop in one of her hands. Her head was turned to look at the camera behind her and her tongue was on the move to the sucker. I can almost hear her moan when she finally gets to taste the sugary treat. I turned to the biography section and just about creamed my jeans.

Now, I'm a Navy man. I was a Seal, but seeing Stephanie in the skimpy army uniform was just too much. She was leaning against a wall with one leather boot clad leg bent up behind her. The camouflaged shorts were way beyond indecent and were unbuttoned just about down to her barely covered promise land. She wasn't wearing a top and her hands were resting seductively on her tight stomach. She rested them there like she was thinking about running them up to cup her breasts. She still had that innocent look on her face, but the thing that almost made me embarrass myself was the Glock strapped to her sexy as hell thigh. Good LORD.

"What you got man? Anything good?" Les' voice snapped me out of a very dirty fantasy and back to reality. There was no way I was letting him see this. Poor Stephanie would never hear the end of it. I wanted to save her the humiliation. I'm sure she wouldn't want this passed around to all the guys at RangeMan. I had to figure out a way to hide it. He would never miss one issue.

"Nothing good man. Same shit, different edition." His gruff told me that he agreed. I closed the magazine and slid it under my jacket. Hopefully I could sneak it out.

"I'm going to head to my apartment. I've got a busy day tomorrow." He nodded and opened another magazine. I stood and grabbed my jacket and magazine and headed to my apartment. Maybe I needed a little time with the Palm sisters too. Seeing my angel like that was too much. How was I going to work with her now?

The next day was sheer torture. Steph was her normal happy self and each time she came around me, I didn't see her in her RangeMan uniform. I saw her in that little thong, or in those army shorts. I spent the day at my desk hard as a rock. I prayed for the day to be over so I could get some relief. Right as I was turning off my computer, my worst nightmare walked toward me. God, this was going to be torture.

"Hey Cal. You got a minute before you go?" Steph didn't look as happy as she had an hour ago so I nodded and motioned for her to sit in the guest chair.

"Is everything okay between us? I mean, you seem so distant today. Have I done something to upset you?" God, she thought this was her fault. How can I explain this without making a fool of myself?

"Everything's great, Angel. I'm sorry if I've seemed distant. It's been a weird day." Hopefully she would leave it at that. She let out a deep sigh and got a sad look in her eye. I remember hearing that she had a date with the accountant tonight so I thought that was a safe topic.

"What time is your date tonight?" Her eyes got big and filled with tears. Shit. What did I miss?

"No date. Kevin called me and ended whatever we had. He said that my job was too stressful for him." She scoffed and then got real serious. "What's wrong with me Cal? Why do the guys that I'm interested in, have no interest in me?" I wanted to find this asshole accountant and beat his ass. I settled for pulling her into my arms and held her why she cried.

"Nothing is wrong with you, Angel. You're amazing Steph. If he doesn't see that, then fuck him. You're better off without him." She sighed and pulled away once her tears had stopped.

"Thanks. I'm going to go home and eat some ice cream." Before she walked away I let my mouth speak without thinking.

"Hey Steph. Can I grab Pinos and bring it over to you? You need real food before the ice cream." A brief smile crossed her face and she nodded.

"Sounds good." She blew me a kiss and then walked toward the elevator. What the hell have I done. I have to spend an evening alone with Stephanie. I can't erase the images from that damn magazine. This is going to be sheer hell.

I got the pizza for me and a meat-ball sub for Steph and drove to her apartment. I don't know why I brought it, but I had the magazine rolled up in my coat pocket. Maybe I would ask her about it. Doubtful, but maybe.

I knocked on the door when I reached her apartment and waited for her to open it. I could have picked the lock, but I decided to give her privacy and wait instead. I was rewarded with a bright smile when she opened the door.

"I'm so hungry. Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I chuckled and sat the food down on her coffee table.

Steph hurried to grab us beers and napkins and we both sat and stuffed our faces. I kept looking at her out of the corner of my eye. I didn't know what to say to her and I was nervous. I didn't realize it, but she was on to what I was doing. She finally had enough and threw her sandwich down and looked at me.

"What is going on with you? Why do you keep looking at me like that?" I could see the agitation behind her eyes. I needed to talk to her about the magazine because I didn't want my stupid reactions to it to cause us problems at work. I love being her partner and didn't want to lose her as a friend.

"Okay. I'm going to tell you something, but you can't be embarrassed or mad." She would be both, but hopefully this will prepare her a little.

"Ooookkkkaaaay." How she turned one word into such a long expression is beyond me.

"Yesterday, when I left the office, I went with Les to pick up his inheritance that some great uncle left him." She looked at me like I was crazy. Maybe I was.

"His uncle left him his collection of Playboy magazines." She smiled and laughed.

"That's perfect for Les. So what? Are you jealous that he has dirty magazines to look at?" She leaned back into the corner of her couch and took a swig of beer.

"Not jealous. The collection was quite extensive. It was every magazine ever published." I took a pause to look at her. She was still just staring at me with a small smirk. "We looked at some of the magazines last night and I came across one that..." Her eyes got wide when she realized what I was saying. Humiliation and shame crossed her face and then sheer terror.

"Please tell me that Les didn't see it. I'll never hear the end of it and he'll make copies and paste them around the office. Oh my God. I knew that this would happen eventually." She was panicking and I pulled her into my arms to calm her.

"Relax, Angel. He didn't see it and I stole it so that he never would. He'll never miss it." She calmed in my arms and seemed to relax a little. We were quite for several minutes. The only sound in the room was the TV screaming at us to buy gold.

"I'll understand if you don't want to be friends anymore." I was shocked. Why the hell wouldn't I want to be her friend?

"What?" Brilliant conversation, I know. I think I should let the flaming skull take over. He might have better things to say.

"Everyone who has ever found out about my pictures has found it too embarrassing to stay friends. They were ashamed of what I did. I did it to pay for college and I don't regret it. People around here don't understand that." She pulled out of my arms and looked at the tattoo on my forehead.

"I understand. I've done things in my youth that I don't regret, but that aren't widely accepted. Flaming Francis up there is just one of those. I'll never stop being your friend." She smiled and leaned into my side. We fell into silence again.

"Can I ask you something, Cal?" Her voice was tentative. Like she was afraid of even asking that question.

"Shoot." I had no secrets from her.

"Why did you steal the magazine from Lester? Most of the guys would have been more than thrilled to find that and would have shown it off." Shit. To lie or not to lie. Decision time...I can tell her the truth and maybe get my dream girl or lie and keep her as a friend. Shit, shit, shit. I've been too quiet too long.

"Honestly. I knew if Les saw it then he would share it and I didn't want anyone else seeing it." She tensed in my arms.

"Why didn't you want anyone to see it?" Total honesty time, Calvin Holmes. It's now or never.

"Because I want to be the last person who sees you that way." She turned to face me with a questioning look on her face. She tried to raise one eye brow, but failed miserably.

"I've fallen in love with you Stephanie. I can't tell you when but it happened and thinking about some other guy looking at you makes me angry. I know you don't feel the same way about me and that's okay. I just couldn't let Les and the guys treat you like your some prop to oogle at." She was quiet as she studied me.

"What makes you think I don't feel the same way?" Her question sent a shiver down my spine. What was she saying? She quietly waited for my answer.

"How could you feel the same way? You know what I've done in my past. I'm not the type of man a good girl falls in love with." She was looking at me still but I couldn't read her thoughts. Her face was blank. She stood up off the couch and walked toward her bedroom.

"Wait here. I'll be right back." There was a tone in her voice that I've never heard before. It sounded husky and flirty, or was I just hoping. Wishful thinking, Calvin.

I cleaned up our dinner mess and grabbed the magazine out of my coat pocket. I would leave it with her. I didn't need that reminder in my room.

"I brought the copy of your magazine, Steph. I'll leave it here." I yelled back toward her bedroom.

"Bring it back to me please." I grabbed the magazine and walked back to her bedroom. I expected her to dismiss me and to ask me to leave. I expected her to ask for a new partner at work. I expected her to never talk to me again. I didn't expect what I walked in on.

Stephanie, my angel, was standing against her bedroom wall wearing the camouflaged shorts, leather boots, and Glock. Her hands were in the same position as the picture and my mouth ran dry. Holy wet dream material.

"You said earlier that because of what you've done in your past you don't think a good girl could love you." Her voice was firm and full of determination. I nodded my head and watched as she cocked one finger and made the 'come here' motion.

I slowly walked toward where she stood, my little soldier pointing the way. There was no hiding it and when she saw it, her eyes widened. When I got close enough, she grabbed my T-shirt and pulled me into her. I felt her softness press into my hard muscles.

"You honestly think that no good girl would be able to love you?" Her lips were so close to mine. I watched as her tongue traced around her full lips and I felt her nipples harden through the material of my shirt. I couldn't talk so I just nodded.

"Then it's a good thing that good girls don't pose naked for Playboy isn't it?" It took me a second to realize what she was saying. I watched her smile spread across her face as she saw the realization dawn in my eyes.

"You're right. A good girl wouldn't pose naked. My angel would though. My angel is a centerfold." I brought my lips to meet hers in a kiss filled with hunger, passion, and most importantly love. I didn't know if we would last and I didn't care at that moment. I had the most amazing woman in my arms and even if we didn't last. I would always have memories of her in this outfit.

A/N - This story wasn't beta'd, so all mistakes are mine. I'm sorry if there were a lot. I'm looking for a beta for my first chapter story. It's completely written and just needs some grammar checking before posted. If anyone is interested and able to help, let me know!