Six:

As Tommy strolled through the park, it was all he could do to quell his excitement and considerable nervousness.  The impulse to run ahead was strong, but he didn't want to be out of breath when he met Kimberly, so he forced himself to remain calm.

Which wasn't easy.

Was it only a little over an hour ago that she called to say that she wanted to talk?  He shook his head at himself.  He had gotten ready to meet her faster than he ever had for any date.  His dad had laughed at how quickly he had sped through his shower, instead of loitering like he usually did.  "Where's the fire?" his father had teased.  In my heart, Tommy had wanted to tell him, but he'd been too intent on thinking about what he'd say to Kim when he saw her.  By the time he'd emerged from the bathroom (having given up rehearsing the speech and worrying about what Kim would like to see him in), Jason had arrived and had been waiting for him in his room.  He hadn't really thought about it at the time, but he had greeted his best friend with the biggest, soggiest, most heart-felt hug he had ever given him.

"Hey!" Jason protested in mock outrage at the wetting he'd received.

"Kim called," Tommy declared jubilantly.

"I know; I was there when she did it," was his friend's knowing response.

"I don't know what you said to her, but thank you," he said, pulling his pal into a second joyous embrace.

"Kiss me, and I'll deck you," Jason warned playfully, smiling all the while as he disentangled himself.  "Save it for Kim.  Geez, I need a towel!"

Jason went on to summarize his conversation with Kimberly as Tommy got dressed.  He concluded with, "Don't push her; she's still skittish.  She loves you, and she won't be happy until the two of you are together, but she doesn't want to be hurt again.  You really destroyed her trust in you; simply telling her may not be enough.  You may have to prove your feelings to her."

Prove himself?  How?  While he had no answers, Tommy knew that he'd do whatever it took to convince her.  They just had to be able to work things out!  He didn't want to consider the alternative.

When Tommy first arrived at the park, he realized that he'd neglected to ask Kim where she wanted to meet.  After all, Angel Grove Park was a big place.  However, he had a pretty good idea of where to find her: by the pond where they had shared their first kiss.  One of his most treasured memories happened on that spot, and it was the place where he liked to go whenever he had some serious thinking to do about Kimberly.

As he rounded the bend in the path, he spied her at the water's edge, skimming stones across the placid, mirror-like surface of the pool.  Tommy stopped cold.  The fire that he had claimed was smoldering in his heart flared brilliantly, and quickly engulfed the rest of him at the sight of the petite brunette.  Kim was wearing a pink tee that hugged her shapely curves and bared her firm abdomen.  Her short denim skirt rounded pleasingly over her backside and rode high on her thighs.  Finishing out the ensemble were hiking boots with pink socks peeking out the top, and a single barrette pulling her hair away from her face.  It wasn't the exact outfit he'd loved seeing her in so much, but it was close enough.

His chest felt tight, and it was very difficult to breathe.  The warmth that had surged throughout his body was suddenly, powerfully, concentrated in his groin.  It was a feeling not unlike the very first time he'd laid eyes on Jason.

Oh, man, he groaned inwardly, wishing that his shower had been a cold one and that he hadn't worn white slacks.  Those were always murder when Kim dressed like this.  Before venturing another step, he jammed his hands deep into his pockets.

Kimberly hadn't noticed him yet, seeming lost in thought.  It was a rare treat for him to observe her like this --quiet, at peace.  He didn't often get to indulge in really looking at her when no one else was watching.  So beautiful....  He hated to disturb her; however, he couldn't stand the suspense any longer.  As he started to call out to her, she abruptly glanced his way.

"Hello, Kim," he murmured self-consciously.  As stupid as it seemed, he could feel himself blushing, and he felt like he was sixteen again.

She didn't respond at first, merely blinking and looking astonished.  Then, she glanced at her watch.

"You're early," she said in amazement.  Tommy made a face, but before he could reply, she went on, her tone and expression gentling.  "How'd you know where to find me?  I was halfway here before I realized I'd forgotten to tell you."

"This place has always been pretty special to me, too," he confessed.  "It's where 'we' began...."  He let the words die on his lips.  He was pushing.  This was her meeting; he'd just have to be patient and follow her lead.

"Yeah, it is," Kim agreed quietly, trying not to smile as she studied him.  The poor guy looked more scared now than he did the time they'd shared their first kiss.  She appreciated that he had remembered... and more than just the location.  He had worn white --white pants, white tank top, and his hair hung loose about his face in gentle waves.  She'd always loved him in white; it set off his tan to perfection, and the tank top he wore accentuated his muscular build.  Plus, she always loved it when he wore his hair down.

So beautiful.... she sighed to herself.  Tommy had always had a strong physical influence on her in spite of everything.  The only thing keeping her from melting into a helpless puddle of simmering hormones was the fact that it was anxiety and not his usual heart-fluttering smile flickering his those chocolate brown orbs.  And if she wanted to be honest, he wasn't the only one who was nervous.  

"I don't know where to begin," she admitted, glancing down at her hands as she wrung them together.  "What is there left to say that Jason hasn't already relayed for us?"

"Some things, though, you have to hear for yourself to believe," he answered quietly.

"Believe?  I don't know what to believe anymore!" Kim exclaimed, the words simply exploding out.  She had promised herself that she was going to be calm and collected, that she wouldn't lash out, but her feelings of hurt, betrayal and frustration would no longer be denied or bottled up.  "You told me you were gay.  You told me you were in love with Jason... that he excited you in ways no one else ever had.  You told me that you could never love me like that.  You told me you never wanted Jason to know... and I believed you!  You turned my world upside down... you stomped on all my hopes and dreams... and you had the nerve to ask me to keep on pretending there was something between us.  I should have told you no, but I felt sorry for you.  I hurt for you, and I wanted to help you.... And now you're telling me that everything you ever told me was a lie?"

"I'm sorry, Kim," Tommy responded; rarely had he heard such pain and disillusionment in her voice.  And her eyes looked suspiciously moist.  If she cried, he was not going to be able to just stand there and take it.

"You've told me you're sorry a hundred times already!  I don't want any more apologies; I want the truth!"

"But will you believe it?" he asked quietly, bringing her up short.

His emotions were raw in his tone, and Kimberly flinched inwardly.  She always hated hearing the pain in Tommy's voice... seeing it in his eyes.  It made her want to take him in her arms and just forget about hashing things out.  She didn't want to put him through this... but she knew that would solve nothing.

"The truth?  The truth is I love Jason, and I love you," he began.  Kimberly had her arms folded across her chest, her fingers pressing deep into her flesh.  He pried her fingers away and held tightly to her hands. 

Kim wanted to look away... to escape from intensity of his gaze... of his words....  Tommy's whole demeanor commanded her attention.  In his eyes, she could see his soul.

"Lightning stuck twice for me," he continued, "only, I didn't know it.  I was so blinded by the first bolt that I never saw the second until it was gone.

"Kimberly, what I feel for you is the same thing I feel for Jason.  Everything I ever admitted to feeling for him, I feel for you.  Everything.  The affection... the warm fuzzies... the excitement... the physical attraction... it's all there!

"I know now that I have loved and desired you both for as long as I've known you guys.  I also know that as much as I wish otherwise, I can't have you both.  I have to choose... and I choose you."

"Not too difficult, all things considered," Kim murmured under her breath.  She knew her words were uncharitable, but she couldn't help herself.

"It was more difficult than you know," Tommy replied.  "It wasn't as simple as the fact that I know Jason is straight.  Really, his sexual orientation wasn't the bottom line.  I could have chosen you without ever saying a word to him about how I'd felt.  I kept it from him for this long; if we got back together, he'd never even have a cause to question my sexuality.  I could have kept this a secret... kept my hopes and fantasies alive... but I didn't.

"By telling Jason the truth --by hearing his reaction-- I closed the door on any hope I might have had with him.  I had to, Kim, because those hopeless dreams all but destroyed what I shared with you."

"What did we share, Tommy?" she wondered, anguished.

"Friendship.  Trust.  And --unknowingly-- love," he said quietly.  "We shared secret desires.  We shared confidences.  We shared laughter and tears... hopes and dreams....  We shared so much that was good.  And a lot that wasn't: fears, concerns, angers, disappointments...."

Tommy was right; they had been through a lot together, and somehow, they hadn't lost everything that they had shared.  Deep down, they were still friends in spite of it all.

Kim felt a tear trickle down her cheek.  All she wanted was for him to hold her like he used to and tell her that everything would be all right.  She wanted him to make her pain go away, but that meant opening herself to him... trusting him again, and praying he wouldn't abuse that trust again.

"I can't deny who I am inside," he resumed speaking.

"I don't want you to deny that part of yourself," she interrupted.  "I never wanted you to be anyone but who you are."

"I'll probably always carry a torch for Jason, and I don't doubt that you'll catch me ogling some good looking guy...."

"Looking never hurt anyone, and I've always known that Jason would have a place in your heart.  It's just that all I ever wanted was for there to be a place for me, too," Kim admitted sadly.

"There always was, Beautiful; there always will be."  Tommy looked deep within her brimming eyes and read the uncertainty therein.  He felt like swearing in frustration.  "What I regret most about this whole mess is that I destroyed your ability to trust me.  You used to... with your life... with your heart...."

Kimberly wanted to deny his claim and was filled with hot shame when she could not.

"Is there any way I can prove what I'm telling you is the truth?"

"I... I don't know," she mumbled, ducking her head so Tommy wouldn't see her tears.  She wished he hadn't asked that question.  She felt utterly sick inside for being unable to take him at his word.  Here he was, telling her what she'd always longed to hear, and yet she couldn't believe him.  More than anything she wanted to have the faith in him that she once did, but for how long had his words and actions contradicted one another?

Tommy gently drew Kim into his arms and held her close as the first glimmering droplet slipped down her cheek.  Her tears were the worst possible torture, especially because he was responsible for them.  Her every shudder as she cried sliced through him like a stake in his heart.  Every salty bead from her eyes that dampened his clothes was like acid eating away at him.  He felt so helpless, and he'd move heaven and earth to make her smile again.  For now, all he could do was hold her --grateful that she hadn't pushed him away-- and hope it was enough to bring her some comfort.

Kimberly felt herself melting in the warmth of Tommy's embrace.  It had been so long since he'd held her like this.  It was funny, but his hugs had always been the most honest gesture he'd ever offered her.  They weren't something he held in reserve; Tommy's hugs were meant for the people he cared about... his friends, regardless of the degree of his feelings for them.

She liked feeling him all around her... his warmth... his strength....  She liked hearing the drumming of his heart... the soothing rumble of his voice in his chest.  She always felt safe and secure in his arms.  She felt cared for (if not loved), and it always made her wish she could feel that way all the time.

It was all Tommy could do to keep from crushing the petite brunette to him in an even fiercer embrace.  Whenever Kimberly was in his arms, he never wanted to let her go.  He wanted to shelter and protect her always, and it pleased him whenever he could tell that she was drawing strength from him.  Whatever he could offer her in the way of comfort or reassurance, he would gladly give.

"I wish I didn't need proof," Kim said at last, anger coloring her tone as she buried her face deeper into his chest.  "I want to believe you... I really do...."

"But I've left you little choice," Tommy replied, ducking his head to nestle his cheek against her silky hair.  He inhaled deeply --as much to calm himself as to fill his senses with her heady fragrance.  "I told you one thing then did another until you no longer knew what to believe.  I understand, and I don't blame you."

His understanding only made her feel more ashamed.  How could they ever have a meaningful relationship without trust?  Angry with herself, with him... with the situation, she pushed him away brusquely, but his arms held her securely.  She struggled to break away, but he didn't let her go.

He wasn't going to let her run away again.

"Dammit, Tommy, I do love you --more than any sane woman should!-- and I probably always will, but I'm tired of being used... hurt... betrayed....  Can you really love me the way you love Jason?" she demanded.  Unvoiced was the plea, Can you make me believe you again?

Tommy caught her face between his hands and tilted her head up so he could look her in the eyes.

"Yes," was all he said.  Then, he bent his head to hers and claimed her mouth in a kiss.

Words would not be enough to prove what was in his heart.  After all, he had destroyed her with words before.  This time, he would show her.  Word and act would be as one.  He would bare his soul and pour it out to her in this kiss.  He had often told Kim how much he'd like to kiss Jason and demonstrate exactly how much he meant to him; he wanted to do that now with her.

Kim was more than a little startled when Tommy's mouth descended upon hers.  Her back stiffened, her whole body going rigid in his arms.  However, slowly, she began to melt under the heat of his mouth on hers.  Tommy had never kissed her quite like this before.  There was an intensity to it... a curious mixture of hard and soft, of commanding and coaxing, willing and wishing.  Puzzling... compelling... intoxicating... intriguing... she allowed herself to be drawn in deeper, wanting to explore the mystery further.  She yielded to him, her arms loosening their hold only to thread up around his neck as she stood on tiptoe.  Her mouth softened, giving over to the sweet exchange.

Tommy's hands slowly skimmed down her body, sending shivers coursing through her.  Her knees felt weak, and she pressed herself against him more tightly as she felt herself drowning in sensation from within and without.  His tongue peeked out, exploring tentatively... questing....  Her lips parted ever so slightly, allowing him in until their tongues twined together in a sensuous embrace.

In that moment of surrender, Kim did more than merely open her mouth --she opened her heart as well.  As their kiss deepened, she felt what Tommy was trying to convey.  She felt something from him that she never had before: love, desire, passion.  Her heart leaped for joy.  Her own emotions surged forward, feelings long held in check bursting forth.  She wanted Tommy to know just how deeply he touched her heart and soul.

In that instant, the tender caresses their tongues traded flared into a heated duel.  Licking... tracing... nipping... tasting... passion that had always been carefully concealed overwhelmed them both.  Love and desire impacted against their senses, a fiery maelstrom of emotion and sensation.

Their bodies melded together, moved together.  It seemed as if they couldn't press their bodies close enough.  They couldn't hold each other tight enough.  Their hearts beat in the most primal of ancient rhythms; their pulses pounded and raced towards something neither had ever experienced.

Neither one wanted to be the first to let go; they wanted to remain lost in the fiery embrace forever.  However, Tommy's mouth reluctantly abandoned Kim's --but only to enable him to grab a quick breath.  In that heartbeat when time seemed to stand still, he drank deep of the sight of the woman in his arms.  Eyes closed, face flushed, lips trembling, Kimberly was alive in a way he had never seen her before.  He could feel the thrumming of her heart, noted the heavy rise and fall of her bosom, heard her breathy gasps for air and the small whimper of disappointment.  Her tongue peeked out to wet her lips.  Those soft petals glistened invitingly, and he surrendered to the urge to devour her succulent mouth once again.

Even as he explored the depths of her mouth, his hands began exploring the rest of her.  They slowly descended down the line of her back.  Where bare flesh met his questing fingers, it was like stroking hot silk.  His hands continued lower, glossing over her rounded bottom until he cupped her sweet swells and gently squeezed their inviting softness.  He felt Kim's throaty purr of delight reverberate in his mouth, and her approval spurred him to be bolder in exploring her other attributes.

Kim's hands were not idle either.  She had to touch Tommy... anywhere and everywhere, delighting in the contrast of his hard, cut sinews and soft wavy hair.  A tingling warmth churned deep within her, spreading through her in fiery ripples as she touched this man she loved beyond all reason.  Even as her body quickened to the feel of his sleek, muscular frame, she felt herself responding to his questing, tantalizing touch.  Her spirit soared as her pulse raced.  To touch and be touched... Kimberly had yearned for this moment for so long.

And so had Tommy.  He felt ecstatic tremors quaking through him as her fingers ran riot through his hair, caressed his face.  He never though the moment would be so powerful... so irresistible.  A part of him knew that matters were swiftly careening out of control, yet another part didn't care.  It felt too wonderful holding Kim... touching her... feeling her pressed close to his body.  His hands continued to roam unchecked, sliding up her bared sides to the hem of her baby tee.  His thumbs brushed across the tempting softness of her breasts; they felt so full and lush....  Then, to his amazement, a stiff little knot nudged his inquisitive digit.  He drew his thumbs back and forth across the hardened protrusions and delighted in the responses it provoked --the soft moan, the shivers shuddering through her body....  He shifted her in his arms, his mouth never leaving hers, so that he could further explore.

At the same time, Kimberly was better able to pursue her own investigations.  Slowly, boldly, she slid her hands down the soft fabric concealing his smooth, sculpted chest.  She wished she could feel the satin of his skin.  Dimly, she realized that she was losing herself in the power of the moment... the power of his body, but she didn't care as her hands skimmed inexorably towards the leather dividing-line of his belt --a boundary she had never dared cross before.  She hesitated, but only for a moment, brushing her palm over the zippered closure.  She met with a hardened ridge of male flesh whose warmth she could feel through the white fabric.

As if in slow motion, she curled her fingers around the solid bulge.  She could feel it lengthening... pulsing... a curious sensation to feel him grow under her inquisitive touch.  She rubbed across his burgeoning hardness ever so slightly.

Then, she heard a sound... a moan... thick and rich that rumbled up from deep within her one-time boyfriend's chest.  It was a vocalization unlike any she'd ever heard him utter, and it sent chills down her spine as the resonance wrapped her in a heady embrace and filled her with an intoxicating warmth.

It also made her cognizant of his hands at her breasts.  She sucked in an excited gasp as his gentle caress sent shockwaves vibrating through her.  His touch was gentle as always, but there was a delicacy he had never shown before.  The weight on her chest felt strange and wonderful.  She knew she should probably say something... she should probably remove her own hand from Tommy's person, but she did neither.  She raised her eyes to his face to try and read what he was feeling.  Though his expressive eyes were closed, his face was aglow with a joy she had rarely glimpsed in him.

Tommy opened his eyes at that moment and saw Kim looking up at him with an expression full of delight and hope.  He was aware of the placement of her hand, but he was past the point of feeling self-conscious about schooling his response to her.  Kimberly needed honesty from him... he couldn't offer her a more honest reaction than that.      

The moment lingered, both lost in the intense gaze of the other.  Then, slowly, they seemed to come down from the heights to which the unexpected whirlwind of passion had carried them.  Hands slipped away to more innocuous positions. 

Kim willingly moved into the circle of Tommy's arms again, resting her head against his chest, listening to the soothing murmur of his heart as it quieted.  She could still feel the pulse of his excitement against her, and she delighted in the nearness of him, the heady scent of his aftershave, the lingering taste of him on her lips, and the strength of his arms around her.

As for Tommy, he pressed her close as he tried to regain control of his chaotic senses and quivering body.  He indulged himself in stroking her silky hair, letting that simple act quiet his careening emotions.  The moment had been more powerful than any morph he had ever experienced, and he never felt so alive... nor more aware of the woman cradled in his arms: her pounding heart, her trembling, her softness, her strength.

"Oh, wow," he murmured.  His low exclamation seemed to break the spell of the moment.

"Tommy, can I ask you something?" Kim ventured hesitantly.  "I know you said that you didn't realize that what your felt for me was love until I had broken up with you, yet Jason told me you experienced a good deal of... well, to be blunt, lust.  Yet you never seemed interested in me in that way --that I could tell."

"That's because I was too self-conscious about it," Tommy answered.  "The thought of you catching me with an erection whenever I saw you in your leotard was only marginally less mortifying than Jason catching me with one whenever he went shirtless.  I wasn't uninterested; I was just really good at keeping it hidden.  And let me tell you, it wasn't easy keeping things down when we were in uniform.  Man, the things seeing you in those pink tights used to do to me!"

"Not to mention Jason in his red ones; he filled them out pretty good," Kim teased.

Her words filled him with sudden trepidation, and he took a step back so he could see her better.  He studied her eyes for any indication of rancor or bitterness.  Her brilliant smile and sparkling eyes only held laughter.

"Kim," he began with all due seriousness, reaching down to catch her hands in his, his grip fierce with his emotions, "did you understand what I was trying to tell you with that kiss?"

Her face brightened, and she smiled tenderly.  She freed a hand to reach up and stroke his cheek.  "Yes."

"And can you believe that I truly love you?"

"Yes, Tommy, I think I can."

He was about to pull her into another exuberant kiss when she broke the embrace, smiling impishly.

"And even if I didn't believe this...." she began, giving him a quick peck, her eyes twinkling with happiness and mischief as joy coursed through her.  "I'd have to believe this...."  She gave his undiminished hardness a playful nudge.

"Oh?  Why's that?" he wondered, perplexed.

"You can't fake that... can you?"

While he knew he could keep his 'interest' from being noticed, could he fake it...?  "I really don't know, but I don't think so.  I'm not that good an actor."

His reply set Kim to giggling, and he regarded her archly.

"That's exactly what Jason said," she tittered, trying to control her mirth.

Tommy rolled his eyes and groaned.  Then, he became sober again.  As he stood there gazing at her, he recalled that afternoon when 'they' had begun.

Kimberly's thoughts had turned in that direction, too, and a playful smile quirked the corners of her mouth.

"I've missed you," she murmured, her gaze darting away shyly almost as soon as their eyes met.

Tommy grinned, and he caught up one of her hands.  As he held it, his thumb idly played across the smooth back of her soft-yet-strong hand.  Then, he leaned in slowly and planted an innocent kiss --just the slightest brush of his lips against hers-- on her mouth.

When he drew back, he let out the breath he had been holding and realized that once again, he had butterflies in his stomach. 

"I've been wanting to do that for a long time," he said, grinning bashfully.

"Me, too," she confessed with the same degree of nervous happiness.

Suddenly, Tommy caught her under the arms and lifted her up.

"Yes!" he exclaimed as he spun her around for sheer joy.

"Tommy!" she protested with a laugh, her hair flying in her face.  "You forgot your lines!  You're supposed to ask me out first, then spin me around."

The memory of their very first kiss was indelibly imprinted in both their memories.

"I know.  I'm improvising," he retorted as he set her down.

"I didn't think you were that good an actor," she jibed.

"Listen, do you want to get together with me at the Youth Center?  You know, nothing major, just hang out?"

"Hey, that's my line you're butchering!" she objected, though pleased that their first meeting had made such an impression on him.

"Talk about me forgetting!  You're supposed to say, 'Yeah, that sounds cool,'" he corrected with a smirk.

"Oh, you...." she grumbled, giving him a playful nudge, and the two reveled in their shared laughter.

"So, what do you think?" Tommy asked hopefully.

"I think I want a Smoothie," she replied blithely.

"I meant about us."

"I know, silly.  I just figured since you never got the chance to treat me to a Smoothie the first time we tried to get together that maybe you might get to treat me to one, now that we're starting over."

"I can handle that."

They stood there, smiling silly, love-struck smiles at each other.  Then, Kim's faded.

"What?" Tommy asked anxiously.

"No more secrets?" Kim questioned hopefully.

"No more secrets," he promised.  Then, he offered Kim his hand.  She took it, and they started down the path together.