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"Here Red," Howard said as he tossed the two small plugs at Naruto. Naruto caught them without looking up from the newspaper he was reading.

"It doesn't even mention you in here Howard," Naruto said as he gestured to the paper. "It just says, 'Captain America was flown thirty miles behind the line by a civilian pilot and Agent Carter'. Well, I guess it mentions you but it doesn't say who you are. Is it so that you can still seem like a neutral company?"

"That's the plan," Howard confirmed as he fiddled with some shields. Naruto threw the paper on the floor and pulled off his hat, placing the plugs in his ears. Instantly the sound was muffled slightly as if through a blanket. "Now let's test them…" Howard cut off as Private Lorraine walked in and whispered something in his ear. "Be right back Red," he said before walking off.

Naruto quickly pulled his hat back on before the blonde woman could see his ears. "You know, you saved a lot of people Doctor," she purred as she stalked forward seductively.

"Doing my duty," Naruto said calmly.

"You know, a lot of woman like men who aren't afraid to get a little dirty," she whispered to where his ear would be if he was human.

"That's really none of my business," he stated slowly, nose twitching at the scent of her frustration.

She hid it well on her face though, only a twitch in her eyebrow. "Well it is when I'm one of those woman," she said huskily before pulling him into a kiss.

Naruto rolled his eyes and thought, what the hell, before kissing her back, leaning over her and bending her backwards. Howard clearing his throat as he returned with Steve made Naruto break apart casually, leaving Lorraine gasping. Steve was staring at Lorraine with shock and disgust. Howard raised an eyebrow at Naruto.

"I didn't really peg you as that type," he said wryly as Lorraine scurried away.

Naruto shrugged. "Well, I can't really get myself a wife now can I?" he said rhetorically.

Howard frowned when he said that and Steve just looked confused. "Good point," Howard conceded before explaining the shields to Steve. "This one's fun. She's been fitted with electrical relays. It'll allow you to shoot lightni…"

However, Steve wasn't listening as he picked up a round silver shield. "What about this one?"

"No! No! That's just a prototype," Howard protested, trying to get Steve's attention back to the electronic shields he created, such as the awesome lightning bolt one.

"What's it made of?" Steve asked curiously as he hooked the shield's straps onto his arm.

"Vibranium," Naruto answered with a roll of his eyes at Howard's annoyed look. "It's the best here in my opinion. No one needs lightning bolt shooting shields. Otherwise you'd be called Captain Thunder."

"How come it's not a standard issue?" Steve asked, directing his question to Howard.

The genius sighed before gesturing at the shield. "That's the rarest metal on earth. What you're holding there? That's all we've got."

"And that's a lot," Naruto added as he tapped the shield. It made a nice 'ping' sound against his fingernail.

Peggy walked up to them. "You're quite finished Stark? I'm sure Captain Rogers has some unfinished business."

The tension between both Peggy and Steve made Naruto cover his nose. "Alright, why does Peggy feel that you've betrayed her Steve and why do you feel like you're guilty?" Naruto asked, his voice sounding nasal.

Peggy and Steve turned to him in surprise. "How did you-"

"Written on your faces," he lied smoothly.

Peggy huffed while Steve answered. "She caught Lorraine kissing me-"

"You were kissing back!" Peggy said tightly.

"It was your first kiss right?" Naruto said, directed at Steve. The blonde blinked before nodding, blushing slightly. "And Lorraine…that sounds somewhat familiar," Naruto said sophisticatedly.

"She was the woman you were tongue dancing with two minutes ago," Howard supplied dryly.

Naruto scratched his hat covered head. "I was kissing someone? Huh, I must be getting old. I can't remember…"

Howard, Peggy and Steve sweat dropped. "So…I think what Red was trying to say was this was all a big misunderstanding," Howard stated placidly before clapping his hands. "Anyway, the shield. That is what we were here about."

Steve blinked before looking at the shield on his arm. "I can't believe I forgot about that," Steve admitted sheepishly.

"Love does crazy things," Naruto said mock-wisely, ignoring the glares he got from Peggy and Steve.

"You said tailor in that list of jobs right Red?" Howard said as he threw Steve's costume plan on the table.

"I don't recall doing so but I can tailor. You want me to make his uniform?" Naruto asked putting his feet up on the table.

"If it wouldn't be too much trouble," Howard said before putting the shield down as well. "You also need to paint this."

"Stars and Stripes?"

"Uh huh." Naruto smiled foxily. "I can do better than that."

"Red are you fin- whoa!" Howard stopped stunned as he spotted three Naruto's in the room. One was painting the shield, another making the uniform and the last was lounging exactly where he'd left Naruto. "You can make copies of yourself?" Howard said weakly, trying to appear not surprised.

Naruto shrugged. "Yeah. Ninja technique. But I was waiting for you to come back. Come have a look at this." He jumped to his feet fluidly and walked over to the shield. The clone ignored them as it continued to paint the front of the shield.

"What's that?" Howard said once he spotted one of the seals.

"It is an indestructible seal. It will wear off in time but it should make it so the shield can stand Hydra weapons," Naruto explained with a smile.

He pointed to another seal. "This one makes the shield come back to him as long as the shield has momentum. It's the best I could do without another person." He gestured to another one.

"This one makes it so it can fly through the air like a Frisbee. Of course, the shield could already do that but it wouldn't work very well. Now it should fly smoothly."

Howard was trying to memorise what Naruto was saying so he could use it later. And ask how Naruto was doing this. Everything could be explained with science after all.

Naruto walked over to the uniform. "Indestructible and should save Steve from dying if he's shot by one of those hydra weapons," Naruto said as he tapped it. "Though don't tell Steve that because otherwise he'll throw himself in front of everything. It's not going to protect him that much."

He pointed to a seal on the inside of the helmet. "Stops concussions." The two clones puffed out of existence as Steve stepped in. Thankfully, they'd finished. The clone on the shield had even dried the paint using a small bit of air chakra.

"Wow," Steve said as he picked up the uniform and shield. "Thanks Stark."

"No problem my friend," Howard said with a grin. "But I didn't do anything. Naruto is a tailor."

Naruto rolled his eyes before going back into instruction mode. "Steve, I'll teach you how to fight with knives and hand-to-hand combat as well as your other men. You'd benefit too Howard."

Howard shook his head. "Too much work to do. You go teach them. I'll see you soon."

Naruto rolled his eyes but nodded. "Sure. Tell you what. Just so you don't feel lonely I'll bring a camera and film all of our adventures."

Howard rolled his eyes. "You do that."

~
"I'm sorry but aren't you the doctor who fixed me up?" Gabe asked as he stared at Naruto incredulously.

Naruto shrugged. "Probably."

"And now you're going to teach us, soldiers, how to fight," Jim said, unimpressed.

"Don't underestimate him," Steve said cautiously, glancing at Naruto. "He defeated Hodge without even trying back at the recruit camp. Not to mention he is Stark's bodyguard."

Naruto frowned. "Steve, I told you I'm not his bodyguard."

"But you work for him," Steve said, confused.

"No I don't," Naruto disagreed. "He doesn't even pay me. I just follow him around because he's my friend."

"The only reason I don't pay you is because you said you don't want to be paid," Howard called from the lab, which was a little bit away.

Naruto rolled his eyes before sliding into a fighting stance. "Hand-to-hand as well as knives you can use. No guns," he said, his face twisting in disgust.

"Does that mean I can use my shield?" Steve asked.

Naruto nodded his head in affirmative. "All of you against me." He ignored there incredulous looks. "Ready? Go."

Jacques hesitated and Naruto took advantage of that. Sliding a hand beneath his jaw he pressed a pressure point and the man fell limp, unconscious. This stunned the others into action. Naruto, used to much faster speeds, walked through it with ease. Gabe and Dum Dum accidently knocked each other out with their punches. James found himself tripped onto the ground and trapped between knives. Bucky and Jim teamed up and managed to hit Naruto who simply grabbed both of their hands and made them tumble on the floor, pinning them there with knives.

Steve hadn't joined, as it reminded him too much of bullying to pick on one person like that. Naruto crossed his arms as he stared at Steve. "Why didn't you try?" he asked.

"I don't want to fight you," Steve said confidently. "You are my friend."

"Are you afraid you'll hurt me?" Naruto asked as he tilted his head to the side.

"Yes," Steve confirmed. He was surprised when Naruto let fly several knives and froze in place. He heard them hit the wall with a loud 'thunk'. Turning around slowly he saw the knives had created the shape of a man on the wall, outlining him and his shield.

"The enemy is not afraid to hurt you Steve," he said softly. "And they will stop at nothing until they have you on your hands and knees begging for mercy."

He turned around and picked up the knives slowly. Bucky made a grab at his leg to pull him down but Naruto stood on his arm, making Bucky hiss in pain. "Good try," Naruto said cheerfully before continuing on picking up knives.

Twenty minutes later when all of the Howling Commandos were awake and fine (excluding the bruised egos), Naruto began again. "So, would you like me to teach you?" Unsurprisingly, they all agreed.

"Harder Steve," Naruto said patiently as Steve parried with him.

"Naruto," he said quietly as they trained. "I'm pressing on you hard enough to smash open a tank. Are you a super serum soldier in disguise or something?" he asked as he blocked a kick that Naruto did with his shield. He grunted at the impact.

Naruto smiled at the Captain mysteriously. "Sure. Let's go with that." He flipped over Steve, much to the Captain's surprise and held the knife to his throat.

Steve sighed. "I'm never going to get this," he moaned.

"You're getting better," Naruto assured. "I just have years of practice. Now go clean up. You guys have a Hydra base to bust and I'm going to have to clean up your wounds afterwards. Now shoo." Steve rolled his eyes before going off, strapping his shield on his back. Naruto sighed and wiped his forehead unnecessarily before sitting on the ground in a meditative position.

Closing his eyes he focused on his strange chakra. He was almost completely out of it so he didn't notice the others come up until they had dunked the cold bucket of freezing water all over him. His eyes snapped open in surprise and the Howling Commandos laughed loudly while Steve grinned apologetically as he placed the bucket down.

"Payback," Bucky said with a grin. "You beat us up and we can't do a thing about it usually. You were completely out of it. We had to take advantage of it."

Naruto raised an eyebrow challengingly. "Is this a prank war?"

Bucky blinked.

"A prank war?" Gabe repeated.

"Isn't that what little kid's play?" Jacques asked Gabe in French. Gabe snickered.

Naruto rolled his eyes. "It's not a little kid's game," he said to Jacques, ignoring his stunned look that he could understand French. "War is serious, and a prank war is no different. I should warn you if you are challenging me you will probably not get a wink of sleep in fear of getting pranked. I am the prank master."

Steve smiled a little before stepping forward. "I will attempt to take your title as Prank Master, Naruto," Steve said determinedly.

He was not expecting the bucket of water that had been empty to suddenly be full and splash him in the face. Naruto grinned. "Excellent. Howling Commandos vs. Nomad. Who will win?"

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