Explosions are Fun
By: Sheltie
I don't own Naruto at all
A/N: well, finally here's a new chap of this little thing I'm doing. As I stated before I'm making this up as I go so it takes me a while for me to write these chaps since I don't have a real clue where I want to go with this until I start writing really.
9-Return of the Blond Bombshell
Temari was back in Konoha and this time as an ambassador. Her first order of business was to find Naruto and Tenten, but that of course was her personal agenda. She first had to do her job, which irked her. She had to deal with idiots who tried to take advantage of her since she was a woman, but also she was a new ambassador. They thought they could pressure her into making deal that would give them the larger slice of the pie.
Oh how I wish I could use some explosive tags on these jerks the Suna princess thought.
Just the thought of those lovely explosions made Temari squirm a bit as her mind flew back to what she, Naruto and Tenten did post-explosions. They had their own personal ones. So good.
/Scene Break/
Temari let out a deep breath as she was finally out of those damn talks from hell. She never thought talking could be so boring, but these stupid politicians made it so. She needed relief and she knew where she had to go.
/Scene Break/
"FIRE IN THE HOLE!"
A loud explosion ripped the still air as it also shook the ground. A huge smoldering crater was left. This was the scene Temari came upon after following the sound of explosions. Each one made her wilder with desire.
"OH NARUTO!"
Temari heard Tenten's loud moan and she squirmed again. She moved forward and blinked when she saw someone knew and she appeared to be a Hyuga, but not one she was familiar with. The Hyuga didn't seem to be paying much attention to the couple. A little ways away from her was Tenten and Naruto. They were in full hot and heavy make out session.
"Um, hello" Temari called out.
"Huh, oh hey Temari" Naruto greeted after he was able to escape Tenten's furious and passionate assault.
"Hi" Temari greeted back.
"So what are ya doing here?" Naruto asked as he was trying to tug his pants back on since Tenten was furiously trying to yank them down.
"I'm the new ambassador for Suna" Temari said.
"Cool, so we'll be seeing more of you?" Naruto asked.
"Yup" Temari said bobbing her head.
"Good, oh yeah, this is Fire- I mean Hanabi Hyuga" Naruto said.
"It's nice to meet you Hanabi" Temari said greeting the Hyuga.
"Nice to meet you" Hanabi said as she was slapping explosive seal on random items like she was playing tag.
"Naruto, less talk more bang-bang" Tenten whined.
"Of course dear" Naruto said then turned to Hanabi, "Firecracker, ready to go?"
"I am big brother" Hanabi said with a sharp salute.
"Right. FIRE IN THE HOLE!"
Loud explosions shook the entire village.
Temari shivered in delight as Tenten tore off Naruto's clothes.
What the hell, might as well join them the Suna kunoichi thought as she began to strip out of her clothes.
Hanabi resumes ignoring the amorous couple and goes looking for more things to blow up.
Hmmm, I wonder what would happen if the Uchiha district became a crater Hanabi thought idly.
10-Pop Goes the Toad
Jiraiya, the great spymaster, the legendary toad sannin and all round super pervert was doing his greatest joy. Peeping on bathing women to get inspiration for his latest writing.
"There he is, our new prey" Naruto said sounding like some old British explorer.
"Why are you talking like that big brother?" Hanabi asked.
"Why not, it's fun" Naruto said with a grin.
"Enough, make with the boom" Tenten hissed, already in need of relief.
"Yes dear/okay sis" Naruto and Hanabi said.
Unnoticed by the toad sage Naruto pulled out his latest invention. He called it the Boom Dart. It was basically a blow dart, but with an explosive tag on it. Naruto blew out the dart with chakra enhanced breath, something he found he could do. It surprised him when he first did it. Anyway that initiated the seal, it only exploded when it makes contact with something other than air. And though the tag was small it created a huge bang.
Naruto shot the dart striking Jiraiya in the ass, which ignited the seal causing a huge explosion. It sent Jiraiya flying up into the air like the Space Shuttle lifting off from the launch pad. A loud scream echoed out like the roar of the rockets.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
He flew through the air arcing and finally landing quite hard into the Hokage monument leaving an indent several inches deep. He was left there til he was peeled off later by Konoha shinobi.
11-Mission Mushroom
Tsunade was rubbing her head. She's been having a terrible headache ever since Naruto found out the glory of explosive tags. Then Tenten got involved and adding onto explosions going on and on and on and on then came sex in public. No one stopped the couple since if they tried they'd somehow get caught in an explosive filled trap of some kind sending them rocketing off screaming. Or a sharp pointy objects hurled at them, very close to their personal baggage. Then Hanabi Hyuga joined in and the warehouse district was wiped out and The Great Hyuga Boom happened. The slug sannin knew all of this was connected along with the multiple attempted sexual assaults of Sasuke Uchiha.
All of this had to stop, but Tsunade didn't know what to do then it came to her.
Send the two off on a mission.
But the question was who'd be their third teammate and who'd be the jounin to lead them. No one wanted to be even close to them due to the extreme fear of being collateral damage. But Tsunade didn't care. The village needed some peace before everyone cracked.
/Scene Break/
"I don't see why we have to go on a mission" Tenten pouted.
"Come on, this'll be great" Naruto said grinning as he sidled up closer to his lover and whispered into her ear, "just thinking, we can find new things to go boom."
Tenten got delicious shivers hearing this and felt her engine purring.
"Mmmm this might not be as bad as I thought" she murmured as her brown eyes clouded with lust.
Shikamaru, with hands stuffed in his pockets, was grumbling about how he was pulled into this mission. He just so happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Just like their team leader, Yamato, who was weeping inwardly about this assignment.
/Scene Break/
The mission was simple though quite long. Border duty. Tsunade found the longest mission she could put Naruto and Tenten on. This would give the village some time to get some sleep and relaxation. Little did they know that they'd get no peace at all due to a certain Firecracker.
/Scene Break/
"So we supposed to watch the border?" Naruto asked as they got to their assigned post.
"Yes" Yamato said.
Tenten frowned. She didn't want to do this stupid thing. She wanted explosions. She looked to her lover pleadingly.
"You are not to set any explosions near or on our guard house. We need it to live for the duration of our mission" Yamato said sternly.
Again Tenten pouted. It had been a while since they blew up a house. Oh sure it was some idiot councilman's home. But that place needed to be remodeled anyway.
"Hey Tenten, look what I found" Naruto said grinning.
Hog-tied were four Iwa nin.
"Naruto, where'd you find those?" Yamato asked surprised.
"Just found them" Naruto said innocently like a five-year-old.
Tenten's eyes gleamed with excitement.
"What do you have in mind lover?" she asked.
"The first ever human bottle rockets!" Naruto declared.
Shikamaru and Yamato blinked hearing this as Tenten's eyes got stars in them. The two watched as Naruto and Tenten began making their human bottle rockets. They used high class explosive tags that Naruto had created. When they were done the four Iwa nin were bound up like they were a spider's prey standing up with a cone strapped to their heads. They had small fins for stabilization and underneath their feet were the explosive tags, a lot of them. They were all on their own launching pads.
Tenten and Naruto were in a bunker that they had created. They were wearing goggles, helmets and ear plugs. Sadly Yamato and Shikamaru weren't in there and wondered why the hell they weren't. They had tried to get in, but were locked out. They banged on the door to no avail.
"FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO, ONE!"
The four Iwa nin lifted off like rockets. Their muffled cries echoing through the air mixed in with the roaring of the explosive tags going on in rapid succession propelling them into the air further and further.
Yamato and Shikamaru were blown back from the blasts getting knocked out from the shockwave.
In the bunker Tenten pounced on Naruto tearing off his clothes.
End
A/N: well finally another chap is finished. Hoped you liked it. Thanks for reading and please review.