Towards The Better

Summary: Post 4x17. Pete doesn't need vibes to know that something is wrong, and whatever this is, he's not going to let her go through it alone.

When she walks into the dining room, he's being silly. He's got a banana pointed like a gun at Steve's head, and he's telling him to 'stick em up' and it's earning him an amused eye roll from the younger man, and that's as close to a laugh as Pete needs. The truth is, he loves making any of them laugh and that's why he's joking nearly all of the time. Because they need it, because they're still recovering from losing Leena, and in some ways from losing Jinks a year ago, and from just generally facing danger every single day.

So that's how Myka finds them, Steve eating his lunch at banana-point as Pete steals chips off his plate. The banana swivels in her direction as she enters. "Stick 'em up, Miss," Pete says in a long, drawling accent.

A twitch of a smile that fades too fast, and something in her eyes. He doesn't need vibes to know something is wrong – he knows Myka well enough to do it on his own, to see it in her face. Some stormy emotion behind the locked doors of her mind, peeking out through shuttered windows.

Jinks can't tell, though Pete doesn't blame him. Myka is his partner, and if this were Claudia, he's sure Steve would see it right away. As much as they're all a family, the partnership still holds the strongest weight – something he was reminded of again just a couple days ago, when he tearfully told her of his greatest shame. The one he trusted her to hear.

"How was the physical?" Jinks asks, casual and oblivious.

"Oh, good. It was all good."

Steve's eyes suddenly draw up from his sandwich to catch Myka's gaze, and his mouth opens almost automatically to refute the statement, but he closes it before he lets a single syllable drop. The human lie detector, so often calling out people in every instance, knows better than to call out a lie now. Because he gets it, Pete thinks. Because he sees now that there is something she's hiding, something that she truly wants to hide from them.

He doesn't know if Myka realized what Steve had been about to announce, but she doesn't make any indication that she knows she's been caught. She acts like nothing is wrong, but Pete knows that's all it is: an act. She steals his banana with exaggerated playfulness, peels it and takes a bite before heading to her room with all the casual grace she can manage. Still, every one of her movements looks heavy in Pete's mind.

Steve and Pete sit in silence for a long moment, til Steve's voice breaks in, quiet like a nervous kid. Sometimes it's hard to remember that Steve is a grown man too, and not just the little brother Pete always wanted. "Are you getting a vibe, Pete?" Steve asks anxiously.

Pete doesn't want to lie but he doesn't want to tell the truth, so he says nothing at all. Instead, he gives Jinks a small, reassuring pat on the shoulder before following Myka up the stairs.

He knocks politely on her bedroom door when he reaches it, but impolitely comes in without waiting for permission. Sometimes it's the only way to get through to her when she'd rather hide away. When he enters, she's nestled on the bed, knees tucked in, holding a pillow against her chest.

She's not crying, but he's never seen her look like this before, like she's trying to hold herself together at the seams.

It's times like these that his body feels too big for him; he doesn't know what to do with his hands – they flex at his sides as he stands awkwardly in the doorway. "Mykes?" he questions tentatively. "Whatcha doing?"

She loosens her hold around the pillow, but looks no less weary. "Just...resting. I'm really tired, Pete. I was going to catch a nap."

He nods though he doesn't believe it. Always go with your strengths, they say, and his heart has always known better than his head. He moves towards her and settles on the edge of the bed, just within arms' reach of her. It's the easy intimacy of friendship and partnership, and he wants her to feel that bond, because he knows she'll need it to open up to him.

"What did the doctor say?" he asks, trying to inject a level tone into his voice. If she knows he's already worried, she'll never let him in, and whatever this is, she needs to let him in, so she won't have to do it alone. It's taken a long time of their partnership to break her of that utterly stubborn independence, and he'll be damned if he lets her regress now when she needs support more than ever.

She loosens up a little more, almost smiles. "Vibe?" she asks, and he knows it's a stall tactic if ever there was one. Still, he placates her.

"Didn't need one," he answers sincerely. "Just a partner thing."

It happens faster than he knew was possible: at the word partner, she falls into devastation, sudden tears swimming in her eyes. She bites her lip to try and gain control, and he's there in an instant, an arm wrapped around her, pinning her comfortably in against his side. "Whatever it is, Mykes, we'll get through it. I promise you, we will."

"It's cancer, Pete. Ovarian cancer."

Cancer. The word stalls his heart and he represses a shudder. He is no stranger to cancer. His Uncle Jack died of brain cancer, even before his father died from the fire. His best friend at age 13 developed leukemia, was sick for months in the hospital before quietly slipping away. So many people, so many others he knows of, so many. But not Myka. He can't stand the thought of cancer stealing another of his best friends.

Not Myka.

He doesn't know what to say, because all words of comfort and assurances would likely ring out hollow and empty in comparison to what he now knows she's facing. He can make no promises because he has no answers, but he pulls her closer to him, anyway. "It'll be alright, Mykes."

"Pete, it's not just going away. There'll be treatments and maybe surgery and—I'm scared," she admits so quietly he nearly misses it.

He presses a hand to her chin, makes her look him in the eyes. "That's okay, Myka. I get it, you know? It's okay to be scared. But we're going to fight this, and we're going to win. You're the strongest person I know, and it doesn't matter what it takes. If it's a doctor and chemo, great, if it's an artifact we can use safely, awesome. But I'm going to be here every step of the way, any way you need me. We all will."

Her crying subsides to small sniffles, and he is warm against her, and in that moment she loves him more than he knows, more than he can possibly understand.

"Thank you," she says, leaning in against his shoulder.

"No problem, Mykes. You think I'd let you leave me that easy? Nope. You're stuck with me for better or worse. In sickness and in health, remember?"

A true laugh bubbles up from her chest, a true happiness to break the fear. "We're not married, Pete," she reminds him.

"Psh, marriage? Married people ain't got nothing on us. We're partners." he emphasizes, grinning wide and eyes alight.

She smiles at that, a real smile to match his.

And it doesn't magically make it okay, and she's still more scared than she's ever been, but his words do what she needs them to, and what he most certainly intended. They make her feel brave enough to fight this.

Because she may be in the sickness and the worse side of things now, but she's got her partner beside her, and he'll help her take this one step at a time.

Towards the better.

A/N: As much as I want HG in there too to comfort and console, I just really need Pete to know, especially after he shared his confession with her. The friendship I think is what Myka needs right now, not the complications that come with her relationship with HG.