AN: So... the final chapter/epilogue thingy. Yes. I think the ending kind of sucks, but I really couldn't come up with anything better... sorry for that.

Musicgal, you just secured your 'aww'-record once again :P.

I was just playing chess with my Dad. We haven't played it in forever, and he has played it much longer than me, but I totally beat him the first game (he thought he won at first, he was totally happy, and then I pointed out to him that he had used my bishop to wipe down my king, which isn't really allowed :P). He won the second one, but still.

And I don't even know why I'm telling you this. I'm rambling, aren't I? It's my birthday tomorrow. I have three more hours left of being a teenager. Then I'll be two decades old. One-fifth century. Twenty years. Sweet Oz, I might as well move to a nursing home right away.

Anyway, thank you all so much for staying with me and reading this, reviewing, adding it to your favourites or following it. It's all so much appreciated, I love you guys! (You should know by now that I never mean that in a creepy way.)

Chapter 32. The Rest Of My Life

'Let me go!' the man yelled. 'Let me go, you witches!'

Elphaba rolled her eyes. 'Did he just call us witches?' she asked Glinda sarcastically. 'How original.'

'You filthy whores!'

Within a clock-tick, Elphaba was on top of him, her knife pressed against his throat.

'Don't,' she hissed, 'ever call me a whore. Or my best friend, for that matter. Especially not when you're the one paying women to share your bed when you have a wife at home.'

'I'm not cheating!' he yelled. 'I'm really not! Why are you even doing this to me? What are you?'

'What we are…' Glinda tapped her cheek thoughtfully. 'We're witches,' she said. 'Best friends. Former Resistance members. I am your Queen. What we are right now… I guess you could call us… private detectives. Or… spies. Some kind of secret agents… I don't know, really – we don't really have a name, but I can tell you this much: your wife sent us because she feared you were cheating on her and she wanted to know if that was true.'

'Which, clearly, it was,' Elphaba added rather unnecessarily, and the man glared at her.

She moved off him, casually polishing her knife with the fabric of her tunic. Secretly, she was enjoying this way too much.

When Fiyero had told her he had the perfect job for her, he hadn't been joking. Corrin had seen to the foundation of a secret agency in the Emerald City that housed, among others, detectives and spies. The idea was that people who wanted, for example, to find a lost family member, or people who – like the woman that had given Elphaba and Glinda their current assignment – wanted to find out if their husband really was cheating on them, could hire these spies and detectives to work for them. Usually, their job meant tracking people down, occasionally punishing them a little – like their current employer had requested – and sometimes snooping around. They had been shadowing this particular man for two weeks before finally confronting him, and the evidence against him was overwhelming, really. There was no doubt in Elphaba's mind that once she and Glinda reported back to his wife, she would not much longer be his wife.

Well, that would be for the best, she decided as she looked down at the man, who was still on the floor.

Elphaba and Glinda had both immediately accepted once Corrin offered them the job, especially since it was rather similar to the one they had had at the Resistance – minus the men seduction and the danger, that is, which they were both quite happy about, and so were their fiancé and husband, respectively.

Glinda and Corrin had gotten married a few months ago, and it had been a grand feast throughout all of Oz. The people had quickly warmed up to the former Wicked Witches and now, about six months after Morrible and the Wizard had been defeated, they were barely even wary of Glinda and Elphaba anymore – though Elphaba still got the occasional strange look because of her skin colour.

'Your wife,' Glinda told her victim, placing her foot on top of his stomach and burying her stiletto heel in his skin, causing him to cry out, 'asked us to punish you.'

'She was afraid we would find out what we did, and she told us that if it was true and you really were cheating on her, she wanted you to sign this,' Elphaba informed him, dangling a piece of paper above his nose. 'It states that you agree to divorce her…'

'Sure, I'll sign it!' he cried.

'…and you'll leave everything you own to her.'

His eyes nearly bulged out of his head. 'What? No! Never! I'd be homeless!'

'I'm sure your wife is nice enough to send you away with some clothes and a little money,' Glinda told him. 'Not enough to pay for another prostitute, though.'

Elphaba looked down at him. 'So, will you sign it?'

'No!'

Glinda dug her heel in deeper. 'Sign it.'

He pressed his lips together and shook his head wildly.

The blonde girl sighed, stepping away from him and looking at her friend expectantly. 'Elphie?'

Elphaba chanted softly under her breath and a bright green beam of light shot from her hand, capturing the man inside and lifting him off the ground. He screamed and yelped and cried out in fear, but both girls were actually enjoying themselves.

'You deserve this,' Glinda told him sternly. 'Women are not to be messed with, buddy.'

Elphaba sent him up higher. 'Sign the paper.'

'No!' he cried.

Glinda took off her shoe and hurled it in his direction. It hit him square in the side, making him cringe. 'Sign it!' she screeched.

Elphaba chuckled and shook her head. 'Getting a bit caught up, Glin?'

Glinda flushed. 'No,' she said defensively. 'I just don't want you to be late for your wedding!'

Elphaba's eyes widened. 'Oh Oz, the wedding!'

'You forgot about your own wedding?!' Glinda shrieked, and the dark-haired witch cringed slightly. 'I didn't… forget, per se…' she spluttered weakly. 'It's more like… um…'

'Elphaba Thropp, you forgot your own wedding!'

Elphaba sighed, then gave in. 'Yeah, I did,' she admitted. 'But come on, Glin – I know it's supposed to be the best day of my life, but honestly, I couldn't care less about the beautiful dress or the cake or the party or what the bridesmaids are wearing. I wish we'd just eloped when we got the chance,' she complained, and Glinda narrowed her eyes at her friend dangerously. 'Elphie, this is serious. You can't have a wedding without bridesmaids and cake and a beautiful dress and a party, and decorations and music and dancing and food and champagne and-'

'Glinda,' Elphaba interrupted her drily. 'Relax. It's just a wedding.'

The blonde looked ready to faint. 'Just a wedding?!'

Elphaba shrugged, truly not caring all that much. 'I don't need all that, Glin,' she told her friend. 'As long as Fiyero is there, my wedding is perfect. I still kind of regret that I allowed you to plan the whole thing,' she muttered under her breath.

Glinda was ready to retort, but a third voice cut her off. 'Hello? Get me down?'

Both witches looked up to find their victim still hanging in the air, trapped in Elphaba's magic beam of light. Glinda giggled.

'That depends,' Elphaba said drily. 'Are you ready to sign the paper?'

Glinda took off her other shoe and hurled that one in his direction as well. 'Just sign the Oz-damned paper!' she screeched at him. 'If we're late for Elphie's wedding, I'm going to cut off your manly parts!'

Elphaba snorted a laugh. The man still looked reluctant.

'I could continue doing this all day, buddy,' the green girl told him. 'My wedding guests will wait. I made your wife a promise and I'm going to stick to it.'

Finally, after one more threatening glance from Glinda, he relented. Elphaba lowered him onto the floor and Glinda pounced on him.

'Elphie, you get to your wedding!' the blonde urged her friend, straddling the man and pushing the contract into his face. 'I'll be there soon, but you need to get ready!'

Elphaba rolled her eyes, but obliged. She jumped onto her broom and flew off.

Fiyero was pacing up and down. 'Where is she?' he demanded.

'They'll be here soon,' Corrin said consolingly, but the prince didn't seem convinced.

Just then, however, there was a crashing sound coming from a room nearby. The men exchanged a glance and then hurried out of the big hall in the Palace where they had been waiting.

Before they could get very far, a green-and-black whirlwind rushed past them, carrying a broom. 'Sorry I'm late!'

'Fae?' Fiyero called, and she turned around and came back to peck his cheek. 'Hi, Yero. Just give me a clock-tick.'

Before she could leave again, he caught her hand. 'What was all the noise?' he asked, taking in her dishevelled appearance, and she made a face. 'I, um… Bad landing,' she admitted. 'I was in a hurry.'

Fiyero scowled at her and she cut him off before he could even say anything. 'Yes, Fiyero, I know. The bone in my leg is still fragile, I should be careful, I know. I am careful. It's fine.' She kissed him again and made to dash off.

'I'll see you outside!' Fiyero called after her, and she stopped again, frowning. 'Outside?'

He grinned at her. 'You'll see.'

She thought about that as she ran to the room where she was supposed to get dressed. Glinda had planned everything, insisting on keeping it a secret from Elphaba; but she had constantly told her friend about the huge party she had organised, with hundreds of people and many pink decorations, and she had already started dreading it.

When she saw the dress Glinda had picked for her, she only grew more confused. It was nowhere near the extravagant, shimmery gown she had imagined her friend to pick. Instead, it was a soft ivory colour, with multiple spaghetti straps that crossed on the back, a fitting bodice, and a skirt that gently flowed from her hips down to the floor. It was a beautiful, yet simple dress, without the beads or lace or sequins she had expected it to have. There was a veil that trailed a few meters behind her. All in all, she had to admit when she looked into the mirror and saw her reflection, it was just… perfect.

Glinda came storming in, wearing a pale orange bridesmaids dress. She squealed when she saw her friend. 'Oh my Oz, Elphie, you look amazing! What do you think?'

The dark-haired witch studied her mirror image again before nodding slowly. She smiled at Glinda. 'You know what? I think you're right.'

Glinda squealed again and hugged the green girl.

'One question though,' said Elphaba as she pulled away. 'Where is the big feast with the enormous poofy dress and the shiny decorations?'

The blonde's eyes sparkled. 'Surprise!'

Elphaba tilted her head to the side a little in confusion.

'I could never do that to you, Elphie,' Glinda said. 'I know you, and I knew that you wouldn't like your wedding to be a huge affair. So, I kept it simple and intimate. Just you, me, Fiyero, Corrin, and the vicar – plus Fiyero's parents, of course. It's going to be a small ceremony in the gardens of the Emerald Palace – the private part of the gardens, obviously, not the public part where we would be disturbed by hundreds of Ozians wanting to see you getting married – and… Elphie, are you crying?'

Elphaba wrapped her arms around her friend in a hug. 'Thank you, Glin,' she said sincerely, quickly blinking away the tears. 'Thank you for doing that for me. I know how hard it must have been for you to not insert pink into the wedding, or cakes, or, well, everything, really, that you mentioned before,' she teased, and Glinda giggled. Then she sobered again. 'So… thank you. I love you.'

Glinda hugged her tightly. 'Love you too, Elphie. Now, here's your bouquet, okay? Let's go!'

'What?' Elphaba asked in genuine amazement. 'You're not going to do my hair or make-up?'

'Do you want me to do your hair and make-up?' Glinda asked pointedly, and Elphaba chuckled. 'Not really.'

'Then there's your answer.' The blonde pulled her with her. 'And your hair is already nice, Elphie. You learned well from me.'

'Yes, well, when you have to seduce men for your job, you have to learn to dress up a little,' the green girl grumbled. 'I didn't really have a choice, did I?'

Glinda giggled. 'And look how well that turned out – your hair looks nice enough and you're even wearing some mascara, which is great. You look perfect, Elphie, really. Fiyero is going to faint!'

'Oz, I hope not,' Elphaba muttered under her breath as Glinda dragged her through the hallways of the Palace.

'Okay, wait here,' Glinda told her when they stepped outside. 'Follow twenty clock-ticks behind me, okay?'

Elphaba nodded and her friend hugged her again. 'Oh my Oz, I'm so excited!'

Glinda started walking down the aisle. Elphaba obediently waited a few moments before rounding the corner.

She caught a faint glimpse of Glinda and Corrin standing on either side of the vicar, being the maid of honour and best man; and of Fiyero's parents, whom she had first met a few weeks before and who were standing a little bit to the side.

But then she saw Fiyero, and the rest of the world faded away.

Her eyes found his and stayed there as she slowly walked down the aisle, towards him. He looked incredibly handsome in his tuxedo, and she couldn't help the tears that sprang to her eyes when she saw the look in his eyes. She knew then that what she had told Glinda was true – as long as Fiyero was there, her wedding was perfect. Whether she got married in a back alley of the City or amidst hundreds of people and tsunamis of pink… or like this.

Fiyero held out his hand to her and she took it. She felt his fingers shaking a little, but his grasp was firm and he squeezed her hand reassuringly.

Most of the vicar's words were a blur, right up until the point where they got to say 'I do'. Just for a heartbeat, visions flashed through her head - of Fiyero being unable to say it, running off and leaving her to stand at the altar like this – but then he said 'I do', and those were the most amazing words she had ever heard him say.

'I now pronounce you husband and wife…' the vicar began, but before he could finish, Elphaba surprised everyone present – including herself – by quite literally jumping onto Fiyero, knocking him over. They ended up on the floor in a heap of white fabric and black hair, her long veil almost trapping them underneath it, but neither of them cared. She kissed him, and he pulled her closer and kissed her back.

'…you may kiss the bride,' the vicar finished lamely, and Glinda giggled even despite the tears streaming down her face. 'You guys are so cute!'

Elphaba looked down at her husband. She kissed him again, then rested her forehead against his and looked into his beautiful sapphire blue eyes. 'I love you, Yero.'

He smiled and kissed her again in reply. 'I love you too, Fae,' he whispered.

She studied the look in his eyes, that soft, loving look he saved just for her, and she felt like her heart might burst with joy.

Whatever happened after today, she knew it wasn't all going to be perfect. There would be tears, there would be fights, there would be anger and sadness and grief; but she now knew that they could handle all that. Because she loved him and he loved her, and together, they could take on the entire world.

Today was the start of the rest of her life, and there was nowhere in the world she'd rather be than right here in the arms of her husband.