Robert felt as though he could not breathe, he was simultaneously aware of everything and nothing all at once. He could hear the sound of his heart beating and yet could not feel it. He could hear Cora breathing but could not see her chest rise and fall .He felt weak, he felt defeated, he was literally at a loss for what to do. If ever there was a rock and a hard place this was it. He found his way to Cora's bed and sat down on it looking into space, not focusing on anything, trying to find something to say.

"Robert?" Cora finally asked softly, standing in front of him with her head tilted to one side.

"But, but … I love you Cora. I …" he could not finish his sentence; he did not know what the finish was. He loved his wife, he finally knew what he should have known all along, and now it was all too late. Now he had to choose – how could he make that choice? Leave and love Cora forever but give up on his duty, abandon his responsibilities, break his fathers heart, incur the wrath if his mother. Or, let Cora leave without him, endure the grief of his broken heart for the rest of his life, miss out on the life of his child, endure scandal and ridicule … endure the wrath of his mother. There was no goo d choice.

Cora stood her ground and straightened to her full height, her back stiff and regal, her neck impossibly elongated and proud; her voice was soft, calm, as if she had not just rocked the entire world on its axis.

"I understand Robert, I am so very happy that you feel that way, and I don't say this to hurt you at all – that is not my intent."

"Then why ask it?" Robert snapped, quickly regretting the force of his words. He wanted to be furious with her for asking such a thing of him. He wanted to yell and shout and demand that she accept his love and be done with the rest of this. He wanted her to understand what it had cost him to offer her his love; he was vulnerable, open, in a territory completely foreign to him. He had never felt this way before, he had never known this was even possible, and now he felt helpless.

Cora looked down at him and set her mouth into a thin smile, she was losing her patience with this. He had professed his love, she was happy to hear the words … finally, believed he meant it, knew what it cost him … but now he sat in a stunned daze not willing to let his new found love move him to any sort of action. It frustrated her beyond words. She had been the one loving in this relationship since the start, she had lived in a loveless marriage unable to stop herself from loving someone who couldn't love her back … and now he finally loved her and he thought just saying the words would do. She wanted to scream at him and yell and make him understand that love is more than the words you say, it's the things you do. Instead she took a deep breath, opened her mouth and spoke evenly.

"I am sure to you it seems an unfair request to make. I am sure you feel frustrated by this. I do understand …"

"Really?! You understand? Cora, how could you understand the position you have put me in. It is unfathomable." Robert interrupted her and stood to his feet, finally gathering his wits about him and finding his voice. He reached out and held her arms, he wanted to touch her, hold her and help her see sense. He loved her, what good could any of this do?

"I am the only person who can understand. Are you seriously doubting that?" Cora could not believe her ears. She had made her ultimatum on somewhat of a whim, she had not been sure what Robert's reaction would be, she did not expect him to act as though he was the only one making a sacrifice. It caused her to grow angry at the thought process he obviously had and she pulled away out of his grasp.

"You are asking me to give up everything!" Robert stared at her with disbelief written on his face. Cora loved him, she did, always had, but right now she wanted to shake him. She could not believe the words coming out of is mouth. Was he that clueless?

"Yes Robert, I am familiar with the concept. I gave up everything for this marriage, and you gave up what exactly? Your bedroom?" Cora was fighting to keep the anger out of her voice but it was not working, she was losing the battle she waged with herself, she was so frustrated and angry she needed some space. She needed to get out. She needed to leave Robert's presence before she said something she regretted, something she couldn't take back.

Clearly taken aback at her words Robert's voice came out hurt, "You act like I kidnapped you or forced you to com here. I never thought …"

Cora interrupted him, "No, you never did, did you?" Cora slowly made her way towards the door, before Robert could speak she lowered her voice and spoke softly, "I need some air, I am going to take a walk … by myself." Almost as an afterthought with her hand on the doorknob Cora added, "I would like your answer when I get back please. I intend to leave for London tomorrow" and then she left the room, closing the door behind her.

Cora walked and walked and walked. Her legs seemed to take her of their own will, she just let them guide her along the path and didn't notice the direction she was going. Her mind was racing, her heart was pounding and tears threatened to fall as every new thought crossed her mind. What if Robert chose Downton over her? Would she really leave as she had threatened? Could they move on from this if she did stay? Now she knew he loved her she wanted them to be together, to love each other as she had dreamed. But the stubborn part of her could not just let him say the words and not move him to action. It made her chest hurt and she thought she could even feel her heartbreak at the possibility of being without him.

Robert sat in Cora's room for over an hour. He expected her to come back soon anyway, despite the fact that he did not want to talk with anyone about what had happened. He needed to sort out his feelings, wade through his thoughts and come to a solution. When she had uttered those words he had felt his heart tear apart. He had no easy way out of this, it was going to painful one way or another, he had to decide which would cause the least amount of pain. He had already decided really, he had known as soon as she said the words – he just hadn't come to terms with how to deal with the loss. It would be acute, he wished there was another way, maybe in time things would change – but for now, there really wasn't a choice. He hoped they could get through this. The longer he waited the more tired he became, and feeling exhausted from the weight of his decision he lay on Cora's bed breathing in her scent from the pillows and fell asleep.

The longer she walked the more she calmed down. She found herself in familiar surroundings and felt a tear begin to fall as she came upon the duck pond. Of course she would end up here, where every memory reminded her of Robert, of the best of Downton. They had visited several more times since their first, and it become their special place. They had made love next to that pond more than once, she let her hand drift to her stomach and sighed at the thought of the baby growing inside her. She was sure that the baby had been conceived there, or at least she thought of it that way in her head. She had planned to tell Robert about the baby at the pond, just the two of them alone. Instead she had thrown the news at him during an argument, she felt an overwhelming sense of guilt over that and she knew she had to apologize to her husband. She was so deep in her own thoughts she did not notice the dark clouds that had grown angrier since she had left the house. She was so busy thinking about what Robert was doing that she didn't realize until it was too late that large drops of rain had begun to fall. Looking up at the sky Cora realized she had gone too far from the house and the rain looked violent and plentiful in no way ready to stop. She had a choice to make, try to wait it out in the barely covered seclusion of the bushed and trees around the pond, or start back towards the house – more than 30 minutes away even if she hurried. Cursing herself for not being more aware Cora decided she had better head back to the house and turned from the pond to run up the embankment in that direction. The ground had already begun to get muddy so close to the pond and as she turned on her heal and stepped up the bank she slipped and fell to the ground with a great thud. Her hand went straight to her stomach as she thought of her baby, their baby, she and Robert's child. She felt no pain, she was sure she was fine, just wet and dirty and in need of getting home. She made to stand and as she tried to put pressure on her left leg she collapsed again, this time feeling sharp pain shooting through her ankle. She clutched at it and tried to stand again, this time crying out as the pain shot through her ankle with greater intensity the more she tried to stand. She fell again to the ground and looked around her in horror. She was alone, she was far from the house, she was already saturated, and now she was also in pain. She would not walk, the house was too far away to even see so yelling would not help. After several panicked minutes trying to figure out what to do Cora tried to stand and hop her way toward the shelter of the trees. The pain was made worse with each step, she cried out in pain as tears raced down her cheeks. She fell down twice more until she finally had to drag herself the final few feet into the somewhat covered shelter of the nearest bushes. She was still getting wet, but it was better than before. With nothing left to do she curled into a ball and cried into her arms.

Robert opened his eyes to the sound of the door opening; his wife's maid stood looking at him in confused silence. Robert sat up, he had slept a long while, looking at the window he saw a storm raged outside and it made him shiver.

"I am terribly sorry My Lord" the maid said, "I came to dress Lady Cora for dinner, but I do not see her" she looked about the room confused.

"The dressing gong has rung?" he asked, she nodded. "Perhaps she is downstairs" Robert offered as he stood and made towards his own room. He stopped as he saw her shake her head.

"No My Lord she is not" Robert stopped in his tracks. Where was she? She had left hours ago. His eyes moved back to the window and the evening darkness that had begun to fall across the storm that raged outside.

"Are you quite sure?" He asked again. When she nodded he felt the pit of his stomach drop and he bolted for the door.

Cora lay in the increasing darkness and cried for her foolishness, for her physical pain, for her tender and bruised heart. She had been wrong to give Robert such an ultimatum, to threaten to take his child from him, to ask him to sacrifice as much as she had. He had never asked her to do that, true she had left everything for their marriage, but there was not an ultimatum – it was just expected really. Not even by Robert so much as by Cora's own parents, by his parents, even by herself. Why would she ask him to go through the dame thing? Wasn't part of why she loved him the wonderful way he was dutiful and kind? He would be a wonderful Lord Grantham when the time came, she could not take that from him. She hoped it was not too late to tell him she had been wrong, horribly wrong.

Robert felt the darkness beginning to envelope him as he rode his horse Triumph across through the storm headed for the pond. He knew she was there, there couldn't be anywhere else. His father had insisted on sending some male servants into other areas to search, and had gone on his own horse in the other direction. Robert appreciated the concern, but he was sure she was at the pond; they had made that place theirs. If he lost her … he couldn't think on that now, but he knew if he did he would command that pond destroyed. His mother had commented on 'that stupid girl' and her being so foolish. Robert had cut her down with a load roar of anger – "Don't you EVER talk about my wife that way again! – Or you will never see us, or your grandchild as long as you live – so help me!" … he had seen the way his angry words had cut at her, but he did not care. He was desperate to find Cora, to make sure she was alright. The preparing of the horses had seemed to take hours, although his father assured him it had only been minutes. Now he rode hard against the rain, straining to see in the faded light and praying with all his might that she was ok. He realized she had to be injured, that was the only explanation that would keep her out in the dark and rain. He hoped it was minor, that she was conscious, alive, ok … and the baby … he couldn't let himself think that way. Thinking of how wet she must be he thanked the young new maid Elsie for her forethought at sending him with a blanket. He rode on, the closer he got he began to call her name against the darkness and the winds. Loudly, madly he called her name over and over again – and prayed she was alright.

Cora could see her ankle had swollen and knew she would need a Dr. She hoped help would find her soon, the sky was so dark now, almost fully night and she was getting so very cold in the wind and rain. She cursed her stupidity again and prayed that Robert would find her. Surely the dressing gong would have rung by now? Surely he would know she had not returned. She clutched her arms around herself and tried to hold on. Softly against the wind she heard the faint sound of something in the distance. She strained against the wind to hear better, eventually she heard it again – definitely a sound … a voice in the darkness … her name. Robert!

"Robert" … her voice squeaked out, she was so cold, so tired, so weak … she mustered her strength and tried again, gathering her might and her voice to yell as loud as she could "ROBERT!"

Robert came to a halt and jumped off the horse. He had heard something, he had heard Cora. She was here. He yelled her name again, frantic, fearful … where was she? He heard his name again and he spun in the opposite direction and ran yelling her name, his voice was hoarse … he did not care. He saw her legs poking out from the underbrush of the bushes, vaguely made out her form laying in the darkness. His heart leapt and sunk all at once. She was here, she was alive … she was hurt. Closing the distance with a great leap he sank down next to her and cried over her as she tried to sit.

"Cora!" he could hardly breathe, she was alive. He had found her.

"Robert" she was completely soaked, her hair stuck to her face in great wet strings, her clothes were dirty and wet through, she was pale, her eyes scared and red. "You found me" she breathed as she reached for his face.

"Of course my love. I'm going to pick you up now darling, I have to get you back home" he said gently as he positioned his arms around her.

"My ankle" she gestured with her hand, he nodded and picked her up carrying her toward the horse. "take me home" Cora said softly, before she passed out in her husbands arms.

It was 4 hours later when Cora sat up in her bed and Robert stepped into the room with a ginger smile.

"You gave me a real scare" he said softly coming to sit next to her bed, taking her hand and kissing the palm of it gently, he held it against his cheek for a moment and breathed in her scent. He lowered her hand, keeping both of his wrapped around it. "I am so glad you are alright Cora, I …"his voice cracked and he couldn't finish the thought.

"Oh Robert" Cora said, her voice was still weak, but she was much better. The Dr had been called, she had been given a warm bath, a thorough examination, her ankle wrapped and propped with pillows, a warm stew bought up to her … she was far from all the way better, but she was safe, warm, and on the mend. Cora felt some pain in her ankle; the Dr had mentioned it was not broken but badly sprained. She would need to rest, he had given her some medicine to help the pain and swelling. He felt confident the baby was well, Cora did not have a fever, she had been lucky.

"I am so sorry" she burst into tears and he held her hand tighter in response. They had not seen each other since he had carried her up the stairs and the Dr had sent him away. His mother had sent for the Dr while they were gone looking for Cora, knowing she would more than likely need him upon her return. Robert had thanked her quietly while he waited to see his wife. His mother had simply nodded, they had crossed a bridge somehow – she knew he was in love with Cora, devoted to her and her first. Robert knew his mother supported them, and cared for Cora. They never actually spoke of it, but they both knew what had happened.

"It's not your fault darling, its ok. I'm just glad you are ok" Robert soothed as Cora cried. She shook her head and spoke through the tears.

"No, not for that. That was awful, but I mean – I'm sorry for what I said to you. I should never have asked you to make that kind of choice. I should never have done that to you" she dabbed at her eyes with her handkerchief and looked at Robert's confused face.

"No Cora, you were right. You have given everything for me and I nothing." Cora interrupted him and spoke quietly but with force.

"That is not your fault Robert, I knew what I was doing when I married you. I wanted to – I should never have .."

Robert help his hand up to stop her, "Cora please. Just listen to me darling. You were right. I have not sacrificed anything, and I will Cora. Not tomorrow, you need to rest, but when you are well again we can leave here. I will not pretend I won't miss it, this is my home, this is my life, but … the thing is … I could survive without Downton, I could never survive without you. I love you Cora, I will do anything to make you happy. Anything. Everything" he pulled her hand back up to his lips and kissed it gently as Cora felt a silent tear roll down her cheek yet again. After a small moment of silence she spoke again, louder than before, the conviction strong and resolute.

"If you want to truly make me happy, then stay. Stay at Downton, stay here at Downton … with me"

Robert looked at her face searching her eyes, he had been shocked plenty today, yet this one surprised him the most. "What? You want me to … what?" he asked – flabbergasted.

"This is your life Robert" Cora explained, "and I love you … all of you, Downton is part of you and so I love it too. Make me happy Robert; make me so very happy by staying here with me … in our home"

Smiling gently at his wife Robert leaned closer and lay a gentle kiss to her lips and rested his forehead against hers before sitting back down.

"I will Cora … I will make you so very happy"

… and he did.