Hey everyone! This is my first story, so don't hurt me too much.

This disclaimer applies to this WHOLE ENTIRE FREAKING STORY! yay. Rick Riordan owns all the characters and previous Percy-doings. I'm clearly not Rick Riordan. I'm only a girl. :D

No copying my stories, fools. (not that I think you will... this story is going to be pretty aflack)

Hope you enjoy everyone!

P.S. This story is best read with potatoes nearby, for effect.

Percy Jackson and the Potato Farm

Chapter One: Potatoes Change My Life

I woke up feeling great. Yesterday I defeated Kronos.

Well, what do I do with my life now?

My mother called my name then.

"Percy, honey, are you awake? Because I made your favorite breakfast: blue hamburgers, blue pizza, and blue chocolate milk. Oh, and don't forget blue potatoes."

I grinned-a very wide grin, it was, for that matter-and giggled involuntarily. Food in general makes me happy, but blue hamburgers? Blue pizza? Blue chocolate milk? Heaven. And blue POTATOES? Better than Annabeth and her shiny locks of golden sandy blonde hair. Like, seriously, if I had to choose between her and blue potatoes, I'd choose the sapphire spuds.

I traveled down the hallway on a water stream I pulled from my goldfish bowl, just to be overly dramatic when exhibiting my incredible happiness to my mother at breakfast.

I got to the table and froze the water into the shape of a royal throne, which I sat upon.

"Percy, dear, I made this special, just for you. It's to celebrate your heroism that you demonstrated yesterday. You totally obliterated that fiend Kronos. You were like a boss."

"Thanks, mom. You are the best."

We ate and I saved the best for last. Finally, I started to dig into my blue potatoes, until I realized...

"WHAT?!" I screamed in fury.

My mother seemed confused. "What is it, Percy, dear?"

Green fire filled my eyes. "Mother, you have deceived me. These are not real potatoes. These are but potato flakes!"

My mother began to cry. She stuttered, "I'm...I'm s-so sorry, Percy dear, I-I meant to t-tell you before...we...we...we are...we..."

"What is it, mother? We are what?" I asked in urgency.

"We are out of potatoes." She quickly looked down. "There, I said it. And for that, I am sorry."

I was baffled. Confused, distraught, even. Why must bad things happen to good people?

I saved the world. All of it but my one true love, blue potatoes.

Tears began to roll down my cheeks, matching those of my mother.

I nearly decided that it was time for me to begin a new chapter of my life: depression. That is, until a thought occurred to me. It was literally as if a blue neon light bulb had gone off in my head.

I turned to face my mother. She slowly looked up at me with a hopeless expression written on her face.

"I know what I need to do now, mom. I need to become..." I whipped my hair around dramatically, "...a potato farmer."

She gasped, but then slowly smiled. She nodded and I marched off triumphantly out the door, ready to become a hero once again.