Summary: A small group of American Fangirls discover that the Doctor is a bit more real than a TV show...and decide that the best way to protect him from humans is to go public with the information. Very public...first they had to convince The General Whovian Public...our story begins after they pulled that off. Unknown to the Tenth Doctor, there is an army of several million adoring fans mobilizing in his corner.


The Doctor Protection League


The Honor Guard

Our Intelligence corps are good...we didn't realize just how well we knew him until we knew he was really out there...and also discovered that Yvonne twat was still running Torchwood 1. The obvious thing to do was to check for Harkness' presence in Cardiff...and we made sure we were just clumsy enough to leave 'tracks' when we found him.

Hey, some of us would like to him to get his hands on us...we're red-blooded Americans, some male, some female, but hey, he's not picky, right? Bite me.


The world is spinnin' too fast,

I'm buying lead Nike shoes.

To keep myself tethered,

To the days I try to lose.

Oh yeah

We set the teenagers to finding ways of cutting Yvonne off at the knees. We figured if we could get the British P.M. pissed off at her that would do it. We also figured that if we made it pretty obvious that Jack was the only competent officer in Torchwood that getting him promoted to the number one slot would fix most of those problems...but like I said, we left a 'trail' so we were pretty sure Tosh at least was watching us. If she wasn't, our trust in her was way over-rated.

We were right...not that the Cardiff crew was stupid or anything, putting Jack in charge of the whole thing was good for them too, so that bunch contented themselves with consolidating their position...and putting iron-clad, Torchwood type thingies in place. I'm pretty sure we confused them a bit, at least at first, since we weren't hiding from Cardiff...just London. We weren't hiding physically either, first, we had the Atlantic Ocean between us and London and second...most of us had music blasting from our speakers while we worked.

We had been buying up nice lots, put up privacy fences and then those of us with nice talents in gardening had been putting in multi-seasonal gardens. In the South, we put in things that bloomed in progression and in the north we made sure there were things like Witch Hazel to provide bright winter color, in every area of the USA, from seaside to desert we put in pretty things fit for that part of the country. There was also always a sign on the gate...TARDIS PARKING ONLY on the outside of the gate and on the inside,

'WELCOME TO AMERICA, DOCTOR! There are 13 numbered pads, just in case you've got more than one of you here at the same time...there are also 13 free standing covered garages and gas pumps...those garages have one car each, in them because these parking areas were pretty isolated...for your privacy.'

We had all sorts of 'welcome' features all over the place...but we also had things in place that meant the various governments would let the poor alien be.


My mama said to slow down,

Stop wearin' out your shoes.

Stop dancing to the music,

Of Gorillaz in a happy mood

Predictably, Old Jack wandered into an American geek-bar when there was about 30 of our younger set setting up to do some line dancing to Gorillaz music...and just as predictably...well. The poor immortal had obviously never been the object of intense interest and a joyful welcome by the more...rabid...version of fans...we older ones tutted at the lack of manners from the older teens and twenty somethings, all the while quietly resolving to arrange some privacy with the man ourselves...once he'd recovered, that is. Because we could see this coming.

"Is that...is it really him?"

"I think so... Looks like him."

"YAY! Let's get some of him!"

He might have taken that bit the wrong way, from the look on his face...but there were way too many teens and early twenties of questionable orientation to count and he went down under the avalanche of horny young things who were dead sure he wouldn't mind if they tackled him, five big breasted girls leading the way.

They were correct.

Of course, as the rest of his team entered the Geek bar, we older ladies opened another door at the top of some stairs and called down. "He's fine...but it could be a while before the younger crowd are willing to give him back...and anyway, the straight male geeks are all up here...I think everyone else is in the pile on Jack."

The somewhat alarmed girls quickly came up the stairs, Owen waded into the main room, staring in disbelief at how happy these people were to see Jack, only to be sideswiped and taken down by his own, somewhat smaller but still substantial wave of fans. Ripping cloth was clearly heard over excited squeals, lewd comments on his anatomy and Owen's startled cursing. Ianto hesitated too long and was also hauled off...and at that point Gwen and Tosh were above and behind scary old Myra Jekins on the steps...who stopped the disappointed looking boys looking at Gwen and Tosh hopefully and sent the whining boys back to Jack.

"Fans. There's different grades of us, actually, but that lot have morals that pretty much match Jack's." She told the two as she closed the door to the steps and started introducing them to her own crew. "We're the Doctor Protection League, by the way." She handed Tosh a page full of top level passwords and smiled as she invited her to pick a computer. "Those are more to keep out random hackers on the internet than anything else. I'll give you the rest of those once you've gone over the reports on what we've done, why we did it and look at the Doctor Protection and Pampering Plan. He does so much for Earth, we decided it's time someone covered his backside and made sure he has some fun. You two get started exploring what we've been doing while we get you some supper. We're gonna spoil you lot rotten."


Oh yeah

Dare to be Fun

Dare to be Fun

Dare to be Fun

Dare to be Fun

Oh yeah

About two weeks later, we finally got Ianto back, five days days after that, Owen limped back to the foot of the stairs and Gwen showed him the living quarters they'd all been offered. It took over a month to get Jack back, more young things kept showing up and complaining they hadn't had a turn. By that time, Tosh had long since been given the full run of the League's systems...and she'd set up some nasty little traps for hackers and we'd left off the passwords. With that Yvonne bitch out of the picture we flat told her that we didn't care who knew what we were doing as long as nobody could shut us down or mess up the website.

Explanations had taken most of a week, even with Tosh pointing out all the systems we had put in place that allowed Old Jack to do pretty much as he liked...while at the same time ramping up the welcomes the Doctor would get if he ever showed up.


"If your people mob him, the way you did me...as amusing as that would be to watch," Jack started, looking quite edible in a short terry cloth bathrobe that ended at mid-thigh, while someone went to get him clothes in his sizes, convenient, that robe, for even now there were always late comers or people trickling in from other offices who ambushed him without warning. He was getting used to being used as a sort of, well, carnival ride...we even caught Owen selling tickets at one point.

"Oh, dear...hold that thought, Jack. Tosh? Did you show Jack the image of his expression we got from the security camera when the kids were taking him down? The expression on his face when he realized no one was hurting him..."

"Oh yes, here. Look at your face, Jack! Now, that's priceless."

"There's worse ways of finding out some folks want a piece of you." Jack chuckled at the look of shock as he was greeted by excited kids, tackled by said kids and...more shock when he realized his clothing was being shredded right off him. "But seriously...he won't take it well."

"Of course not. We have something else in mind. He'll still be mobbed, but by children who also enjoy the show. Ten and unders, plus the littlest ones who are young enough to just like him for himself without judgement. To hug him 'just because' and smile at him and mean it for no reason." One of the older ladies told him. "I think telling him he is loved, wanted and trusted will go farther after the presentation we have planned for him. Should be adorable, too. Excited, happy kids should shatter any defensiveness."

Jack started laughing. "He's in so much trouble...you're using your kids to domesticate him."

"Well, yes, of course. Several hundred thousand of them, all together, actually."

"Yeah. He's toast."

"That's the idea, Jack...we'll look after him properly but to do that we need him to cooperate...though it's best if he doesn't cop to what's actually being done."

"He'll never know what hit him." Jack just shook his head, then threw it back, roared with laughter and finally tipped sideways off his chair, onto the floor as he just lost it.


No one found out how Jack got him to land the TARDIS in the Orlando TARDIS Parking Zone sited inside Disney World until the Doctor actually told the folks waiting for him, but our Florida people were waiting with the welcoming committee. Scores of very young, very small humans whose heads only came up to his hips...well, some of them did.

There were crawling and barely toddling babies in the crowd of youngsters as well, and those were doing what they saw the older children do...and were giving him hugs around his legs and ankles because they couldn't reach any higher, while the bigger kids were grasping his hands to squeeze his fingers or tugging him forward and deeper into the crowd of happy children, as soon as the doors opened and he stepped out. Our poor Doctor had to be very careful where he stepped...

Most of the kids old enough to talk were chanting some variation of 'It's him, it's really him!', 'Th' Doctor's here!' or 'I love you Doctor!' and jumping up and down, squealing in excitement and genuine glee at his presence. The babies babbled at him and joyfully grinned when he babbled back. He was by no means proof against the joy of happy children who made it clear that all they wanted was him to be himself.

He did look a bit shocked at the idea, but the little ones tugging at his fingers to get him down on their level so they could hug his neck and give him kisses convinced him as easily as they overwhelmed him.

One of the younger mothers finally got the kids settled though there were a few who stubbornly refused to turn loose of his legs. He studied one of them, telling the lad he looked rather familiar.

"My grandma rode with you, Doctor."

"Did she? What's her name?"

"Dorothy, but she said to say you called her Ace. Did she used to be a boy, too?"

The Doctor threw back his head and roared with laughter, "No, son, she didn't. She gave herself that name. And yes, she was with me for many years, when I was in my Seventh form. Used to call me Professor, just to annoy me..." He chuckled. "I raised her from the time she was very small. About your size actually."

"I've heard all sorts of stories from her about you...before you were this you."

"Yes, I just bet you have."

"So, if you raised her, that makes you...does that mean I can call you Grampa, Doctor?"

"Well, yes, I suppose it does. By adoption, at least." He looked gobsmacked again. He supposed that by raising her, he was at least her adoptive father...and that did make this little one his grandson by extension.

"That means you got family cuz I've got five older brothers, two younger ones and three sisters."

"Do you, now? That's a lot of grandchildren." He breathed, more than just a little bit shocked.

"I take it Jack didn't warn you?" One of the fathers present asked, grinning.

"No, only that there was a 'situation' that needed my attention here."

"That old rascal! I'd pick a switch for him, but I suspect he'd enjoy it far too much." One old lady said in exasperation. "It took a while for us to realize you were a real person, we didn't know you actually existed. Once we had that proved to us, though...honey, it's long past time to say 'Thank you' and start making damned sure you understand that to us, you're the biggest, most lovable hero in the whole of existence."


He looked up at hundreds of eyes looking back at him in clear affection...and then he promptly blushed.

"We all get it, Doctor. All of us." One woman told him quietly. "It's past time someone started covering your backside when you're planet-side here, at least...so we did something about that. It's also past time you had some fun when you're here, openly...we've taken care of that, too. Anyone wanting your hide has to go through us. We're gonna spoil you rotten. We want you happy."

"And we are several million strong." Another added.

"Granted, some of the younger ones are currently mobbing Jack...you may want to avoid that bunch until they calm down a bit, since, as Owen and Ianto discovered, the ones that can't reach Harkness aren't choosey on their runner-up prizes and you, my darlin' Doctor, would be the grand prize. We thought you'd be more comfortable with us and the kids than with the older teens and twenty-somethings as they'd probably do to you what they did to Jack and his lads..."

"The more excitable crowd at the geek bar had Old Jack and his boys starkers in seconds...and the security cameras recorded it. It's been making the rounds for weeks and we've got a copy for you." One of the fifteen year old girls told him bluntly, handing one to him and grinning at him as he went pink when he looked at the cover art.

"Um...thanks. I think."

"And while we're sure you're absolutely lovely in the bare, we're also sure you don't want your suit shredded." A woman in her forties told him, smiling at him.

The Tenth Doctor flushed a deeper shade of red as he understood what was being said, what had been done and what was being done...for him. "Thank you." His tones were beautiful and his voice quiet. He let us lead him, after a polite pause to find out if he was by himself or not, which he was...and he saw the worried little speaking glances that flicked from woman to woman...to a house that had been built here.

"It's your's. And it's not the only one, either."

"What?"

"We've got a ton of these gardens, TARDIS parking zones, we call them. All of them have a house on them if you ever need one." Someone handed him a small book full of addresses...all over Earth...and he felt moisture in his eyes at what that meant in terms of acceptance.

"We know you're alone, but you don't have to be. You're our's now, here...I have no idea why the U.K. hasn't already taken care of this, but, there now, all settled." One of the women was an immigration official and she handed him a US I.D., "No need for the physic paper to claim a place amongst us, Doctor. Whether you decide you need it or not, you're a citizen of the United States, now. A resident of the planet you have worked so hard, for so long to keep safe...and we really do adore you, you know?"

"Who are you people, anyway?"


"We are The Doctor Protection League of Planet Earth and we consider you absolutely precious."

"High time someone did something to make you understand how very many people love you, sweetheart." An old woman in her eighties told him, patting his left hand as she tottered there, leaning on her cane.

He was overwhelmed. There was more emotion in his dark eyes than he could even begin to express. "I don't know what to say." His voice was rough. "I'm supposed to have a gob, but..."

The old woman merely gave him a hug. "No need to say it, Doctor. You have shown us constantly. You have guarded us for hundreds of years and it wasn't until very recently we discovered you were more than just a story. Once we knew though..."

"The biggest problem you're likely to have is deciding which young people out of the millions of applications that have been sent in, you're going to possibly accept. You won't believe how many kids want to go with you, darling. Most of them have training in some kind of weaponless fighting too...lots of blackbelts in that bunch of eager young'uns, no reason to be alone again, not when there's so many wanting to pamper you." A slightly younger but still gray headed older woman told him. "Now, come along, dear...and let us feed you. There are women here, who between them, have over forty two thousand different recipes that include bananas in the ingredient list."


There's a monkey in the jungle

Watching a vapor trail

Caught up in the conflict

Between his brain and his tail

Oh yeah

The Doctor was stunned. There was no other word for it. Every time some hotshot official tried to bother him, no matter how large or small the town or where on Earth it was, there was a sizable crowd of women who soon showed up and shoved him behind them, several quickly had the person or people cornered, angrily telling them off...usually with a rapidly wagging finger under their nose, while someone else tutted and ushered him into a private home to enjoy a quiet meal and asked how 'his folks' could help while he ate.

Often the people running interference were kids, some of them rather small at that. Grasping his fingers they led him off, while someone's mother scolded the cop or politician or whoever. Of course, when the kids fetched him, he usually ended up in a large playground or in a water-park or some such thing and all they asked of him was that he share their joy of play and he did so. Children didn't judge...and neither did their mothers, in this case.

In the UK, even UNIT discovered that they didn't really want to rile the hoards of grannies that turned out to pull him away from military types. Angry grandmothers in their eighties, waving walkers or canes were something no one should have to face. Winning an argument with people who took your past cover stories and loudly shredded them to the smallest details in public was impossible.

"YOU did nothing, sonny-me-lad! The Doctor did all the work, you lazy, useless thing!" An angry, cane-waving elder shouted at the top of her lungs on more than one occasion. The first time he'd witnessed that, he'd been just inside the TARDIS doors and honestly had a hell of a time trying not to laugh at the cornered UNIT squad.


And if Time's elimination

Then we got nothin' to lose

Please repeat the message

It's the music that we choose

How could he resist this? He had long known, in an 'on the outside looking in' sort of way, of the human capacity for love and welcome...for the first time, in a huge way, he was securely on the inside.

He had seven young people with him right then and they laughed as they followed him when he ran, happy laughter, full and free and filling the air as they followed where he led. Granted, he was getting very good at settling disputes as to whose 'turn' it was to go 'Running with the Doctor'.

When had he forgotten the joy in what he did? Seventh? Before? These kids reminded him...oh yes...whole packs of them appeared wherever he did, shortly after he landed somewhere. Many were girls dropping off care packages and a hug, though a few times they brought live plants for the TARDIS' gardens...he had over a dozen species of banana now, each in sufficient numbers to have sustainable groves in the TARDIS.

He was also pretty sure he had every domestic plant known to gardeners on Earth having ticked the last one off his mental list a week ago, though he knew there were some people trying to develop more just to add to his collection.

And just yesterday a tiny little girl had given him the latest of five puppies a child had gifted him with. A wee little thing, he'd seen the parents and the little bitch wasn't going to get big enough to be anything but a decoration. It was a Yorkie...he didn't dare try to carry it in one of his pockets...who knew where it would end up?

The others were of larger breeds, big enough to help in a running fight, if need be. Dogs, at least the Earth versions, he was discovering, were warm, furry, highly empathic, very protective creatures that were always willing to cuddle.

And they were addictive.


OK bring it on down:

Yeah, we're gonna break right out

Oh yeah

"We didn't tell you about this place because it's never certain when the Door will appear...come on in, Doctor, let us show you one of the wonders I seriously doubt you've seen...bring the TARDIS though, you'll want to be able to return here on your own. Tis a special place, this. Carrettea Valley, there's things here just for you. We don't know how long they've been here, though. We're very fortunate we had a lady that knew how and where to find and open it."

He gazed at the sight before him with tears streaming unheeded down his face, there in stasis, in uncounted rows, were hundreds of very full Looms, along with thousands of Time Lord children of ages when they would have already looked into the Schism. He wasn't alone, not at all.

Not even close, actually, as the each Loom held millions of Gallifreyan lives.

"Carrettea Valley is also known as Earth's World Tree, Doctor. Around the back of this building, on short, brick pedestals, are TARDIS'. As far as the eye can see, they are there in their stasis fields, waiting. To the left, up the hill, is a building that I think is probably a TARDIS garage...parts and tools and things. Bet she'll enjoy you having the parts and tools you need for her, won't she?"

"Oh my, yes...she will." But he was moving down the rows now, flicking a switch here and there to check a reading, then set the sequence needed to bring ten of the children out of stasis. It was a drop in the bloody bucket, yes...but it was a start. His TARDIS told him that the ten TARDIS' bonded to the children had just come online...


Please repeat the message

It's the music that we choose

Oh yeah

He grinned joyfully as he watched the children playing on the grassy slope below the Loom Houses as the women spoke to him, also having their watchful eyes sharp on the newly awakened kids as well as their own. And in the Doctor's mind there were ten young voices dancing where there had been black silence.

"The intention was for you to use the Carrettea Valley in the place of the planet you once had. It's not the same, but it's the best we can do. This Valley only has one door, you can enter from one Earth and exit on another. No need for a rough ride as long as you come here first. Carrettea Valley is unchanging, unless someone adds or removes something. Surely you have noticed that Time doesn't flow in this section? It's not supposed to...if you see it start, you've got problems..."

His head shot up, his eyes narrowed and he looked around, nodding.

"The deeper into the Valley you go, the younger your body becomes...and it doesn't reverse the process when you come back up. Only does it the once, though...no need to worry about becoming an infant with repeat trips to the Lakes."

"This is a place immune from paradox by it's nature. This place touches every Earth in creation, in every universe, all at the same time. Over countless ages, your people have made trips to untold numbers of universes, each bringing something back from every Earth...this valley holds a bit from all of them. In some ways, it's rather like a naturally occurring Zero Room except its safe to live in...permanently. It may very well have been what gave your species the idea for such rooms."

"Yes, don't you see? Oh, Doctor...go and get your Rose, love...just drop in here on the way back, is all. Using this as your gateway, you can reach any universe safely...but we didn't want to disappoint you without the Door handy, so we waited until it appeared. Now that your TARDIS has been here, she can get back in anytime she likes, so scoot, go get your lady...you've more kids to start waking up."

"Yes, and training."

"Oh yes, that of course. And because this place is immune from Paradoxes, all your bodies can here at the same time and you need hide nothing from any of them. Though...do you mind if we ask you to leave Old Jack here? This place needs a permanent guardian other than just you, I mean, and this trumps the other kind of universal guard position he would be stuck with."

"Yeah, he's still stuck with being one, but the type can change, right? We can keep him from being the Face of Boe, if you allow it."

He glanced at Jack and saw two timelines splitting off from this point. He nodded. "Jack, you would be better off here, trust me."

Harkness glanced at the woman who had spoken of the Face of Boe, he knew what that was and shuddered at the thought. As he did so, the Doctor saw the Time Line that led to that fate disappear and knew Jack would be staying.

"I keep finding myself saying this, but...I don't know what to say."

"How are we taking care of you properly if we don't make sure you have what you need most?" One of the twelve year old girls asked him. "You're our Doctor and you are precious to us."

The Doctor was very well aware that this little girl didn't even know the woman who had first told him that.

"Go get Rose, Doctor, there will be time for talk later." One of the young mothers told him in a kindly tone. "The valley is huge and there are so many things we'd love to show you...but we rather think she'd get her feelings hurt, if she doesn't get to see it too, at the same time."

"Yes. A special first time...just think, for once, something so utterly new to you, that you'll have a sense honest wonder on seeing it, is something you can share with her."

"Go on, then, Doctor. We want to meet her."


Oh yeah

Dare to be Fun

Oh yeah

Dare to be Fun

OK bring it on down:

Yeah, we're gonna break right out

Dare to be Fun

Oh yeah

Dare to be Fun

Oh yeah

He went and got her, of course he did...it didn't take long either, she was in her period of solitary mourning at the Bay, her yearly pilgrimage that she took...and she boarded without a backward glance. She'd already outlived her family after all...and she'd never had eyes for anyone but her Doctor anyway, not after the first time. He told her what had been going on, on Earth and she smiled through happy tears. There were a very large number of women and children, with a lesser number of men who had been taking very good care of her Doctor.

When he opened the doors and she caught her first sight of The Carrettea Valley she gasped at the beauty.

"He's back!"

"There she is! Rose is here!"

She held onto his waist tightly as they stepped into the morning sun and heard the swell of sound from the hundreds of welcoming shouts and felt the waves of love from the cottages along the sides of the upper valley where the Loom Houses were.


Oh yeah...


**TBC**


**Carrettea = Car-ar-AH-tee-ah is something I made up. If you're doing a story that includes the World Tree, you are free to either use it or make your own.

***Get the Cool Shoe Shine owned by GORILLAZ