So this is the first chapter of a ten-shot, I guess. Poor Conner…

Sorry if characters are a little OOC. I wanted this to be funny!

Give me ideas on other ways to scar Conner? ;D

"So where is he again?" Wally asked, a smirk on his face. He tilted the mirror and winked at his best friend in the back.

Dick cackled and said, "A hotel not far from here."

"I'm still confused…" Conner said slowly, blue eyes turning from his shotgun spot to him in the back.

"Well Supes, apparently, Flash managed to drag Bats to go clubbing and they both got crazy drunk. And he called me an hour ago from a hotel to say…" at this point, Dick was laughing so hard he made retarded seal sounds. Wally smacked the back of his head, but the Boy Wonder was still giggling.

"To say…?" Conner pressed on.

"To say he woke up, naked, in a bed with Flash!"

"Does that mean…" Conner's eyebrows furrowed with the effort to grasp the concept.

"Yup. Bats and Flash had some sexy-time!" Dick laughed wickedly.

"I'm still scarred…" Wally muttered, pressing his foot to the pedal and increasing the speed to 90 miles per hour. He drove the sports car like a maniac, almost swerving into the opposite lane and hitting a mini-van. He laughed and hit a blue button, and the car shuddered violently.

"AH!" Conner yelled, looking down and trying to strap on his seatbelt, but it was too late.

He was flung into the back, on top of Dick, who was cackling wildly. The top of the car retracted, and the seat which Conner had just been sitting on was ejected upwards and was quickly torn away by the wind.

"Off my bird!" Wally called from the front seat. Conner attempted to get off Dick, but the jerky motions of the car made it very difficult.

The car suddenly swerved to the left, and the super teen went flying into a window, crackling the glass. The speedster grinned in approval and slammed his foot on the pedal. Conner could feel his breakfast start to rise in his stomach. The tires squealed as they sped around a corner, Dick yelling, "Faster, KF! Faster!"

"No! Slow down!" Conner yelped, finally sitting properly in his seat. The Boy Wonder smirked at him, waving around a batarang,

"Put that away before—"

BOOM!

"Dammit Rob!" Wally snapped, turning sharply and coming to a screeching halt.

Conner ripped off the door in the hurry to get out and flung it to the side, jumping out and immediately emptying his stomach to the side. Dick nimbly got out, smiling sweetly at Wally, who also climbed out easily.

"What's the matter, Supes?" Wally grinned wickedly, green eyes glinting.

Conner just groaned and wiped his mouth, making a mental note to never ride with the two again. Half the car was on fire, and two doors had been severed completely from the main body. The super teen just stared at it, then turned to a cackling Dick and a smug Wally.

"Well Supes? Let's go!" the speedster scooped up Dick and began to run along the road. Conner super-jumped after them, his head still spinning from the crazy ride he had been forced through.

When they finally got in front of the hotel, Dick had resumed his cackling again. It was a pretty swanky place, and when they entered, their attention was immediately drawn to the huge glass chandelier hanging from the center of the high ceiling.

"Hello, what room is Bruce Wayne checked in?" Dick asked at the front desk, tapping his fingers on the counter and smiling innocently at the girl, who blinked a few times at the confident ebony before flipping through a book of signatures.

"Uh…Room 435," she told him, and he winked at her, already striding in the direction of the elevator. Wally followed him, a wide grin on his face as he wrapped an arm around his best friend, chuckling.

"You coming, Supes?" Dick smirked, and Conner decided he wasn't going to get into an elevator with the crazy pair. Instead, he shook his head and headed towards the stairs.

He took them 3 at a time, wanting to reach the top before the two, and jumped onto the platform just as the elevator doors slid open. He gave a silent sigh of relief as he observed that they hadn't managed to jam all the buttons. Dick walked out, Wally holding his cape aloft, a wide grin on his face.

"Can we just go…" Conner muttered, trying to remember what room it was.

"Yup! This way, to BatFlash!" Dick giggled like a manic and led the way, taking lengthy strides like he was strutting down the catwalk. Wally, smirking, looked over at Conner's priceless expression and laughed loudly. The super teen flushed red and glared at the speedster, who covered his mouth with a hand and tried to look serious.

The trio finally stopped in front of a door that looked like beer bottles and batarangs had been thrown at it. Dick sweatdropped, mumbling something about speedsters and overreacting before pulling out a knife and breaking the lock with one deft slash.

"And here I thought you were good with computers," Wally mused, messing up the ebony's hair. He swatted at the ginger, a smirk forming on his face as he slowly opened the door.

"Don't come in!" a rough voice hissed, and suddenly someone was pushing hard on the opposite side of the door. Dick's smirk turned gleefully evil as he answered innocently, "Aw, Bats! Open up!"

There was a fraction of a second pause before the door cracked open. Bruce Wayne stuck his head out, eyes fierce when he noticed Conner and Wally. He opened his mouth, and was probably going to banish the two to the underworld or something if it wasn't for Flash.

"Mm…hey Brucey, you coming back into bed for a seventh round?" Flash called hoarsely from the room, and Conner's face flamed bright red. Batman's face also colored, but he answered tightly, "No, honey. Maybe later."

Wally had to smirk at that, and Batman gave him a famous Bat-glare. The ginger gulped and turned pale, hiding behind the still red super teen.

"Uh, so, Bats? What's the problem here?" Dick finally asked, looking puzzled, his mouth pulled into a pout.

"I need to get out of here undetected….but every time I try and get out of the room…stand back." The Dark Knight grimaced and instructed.

Conner Dick, and Wally all backed up a few feet, and Batman suddenly shoved the door open and ran out—Wally noted the lightning boxers and red shirt he was wearing with a groan—heading towards the elevator. But like a speeding bullet, a flash of black caught him and threw him over one shoulder. For a second, the 3 young heroes could see a sleepily annoyed Barry Allen carrying the feared Batman—who was blushing darkly—over one shoulder, before they disappeared into the hotel room again.

"You see?" came the muffled yell of Batman.

"Oh no…no way! Barry! Stop!" he groaned and went silent. Conner's eyes were wide in horror; he took a few steps back as Dick cracked up. Wally slung an arm around his best friend and grinned as well.

"Since they're making BatFlash babies…I think we can at least have a BirdFlash make out session?" Wally looked at Dick with a puppy pout.

Dick grabbed the speedster by the front of his shirt and smashed their lips together. Suddenly, hey heard a loud shriek, and broke apart to see a very scared Conner running for the stairs at full speed. Wally and Dick looked at each other and cracked up, before kissing again.

And that was the first installment! How was it?

Please review!

~samx