Disclaimer; I don't own anything
Where do we go from here?
Nathan squeezed the steering wheel hard and clenched his jaw. The rain was still falling hard against the windshield, making it almost impossible to see the road ahead of him. But that was not the main thing worrying him at the moment. His eyes kept darting to the rear view mirror, and every time his eyes hit the reflective glass, he had to swallow hard to keep it together. He couldn't fall apart now. He was the one that needed to be strong and keep it together. He knew that they needed him, even though they didn't expect him to be, he still needed to be the rock right now. For them. For Jamie and Haley.
His head was still swirling with ten thousands thoughts and images. Images that felt so surreal to him, yet they were very real. The frightening feeling when he first saw Jamie standing in the middle of the road, soaking wet with the flashlight in his hand. He couldn't even begin to describe what he was thinking at that very second. The worst possible thoughts kept firing through his mind in a continuous loop. Then, the very vivid image of Brooke's lifeless body on the ground and Julian hovering above her while frantically trying to get her back to life.
A cold shiver ran down his spine before his eyes sought out the rear view mirror once again. His chest ached by the sight of the two of them in the back. Jamie's head was leaned into the crook of Haley's neck with her arms securely around his body while she was whispering soothing words to him, as one of her hands were gently stroking the back of his head.
Nathan tore his eyes away from them to watch the road. He needed to get them both home as fast as he could before they ended up catching a cold or worse. Hell, even he could end up catch something if he didn't get out of these clothes soon enough.
He moved his eyes to the mirror again, when he pulled up to a stop sign. He felt a sting in his chest, when he met Haley's eyes through the mirror. Even in the dark, he could see that her eyes were shining with tears which she fought hard to keep at bay. He reached his hand out behind him while he held her gaze in the mirror, and when he felt her soft hand clasp in his, he squeezed it softly and gave her a small smile. She closed her eyes for a second and squeezed his hand back.
"We're almost there." Nathan whispered hoarsely before he let go of her hand and continued driving.
Nathan put the car in park and turned the engine off, as the garage door closed automatically behind them. He took a deep breath and dragged his hand through his wet locks before he climbed out of the car. He slowly opened up the door to the backseat and held out his hand.
"Come on, let's go inside and get you out of these wet clothes." He spoke low and watched as Jamie lifted his head off of Haley's shoulder before he carefully slid his way over to him and jumped out.
Nathan put a comforting hand on his back as he moved to the side so that Haley could get out as well. His little body was shivering as he felt him lean into his side. Nathan held him securely against his body while he extended his other hand to Haley so he could help her out of the car. Once she was out, he closed the door before he started walking towards the door, with Jamie tightly tucked into his side and Haley holding onto the hem of his jacket. Neither of them said a word as they walked inside. The extent of what they had witnessed tonight consumed all three of them, and instead of talking they simply held onto each other and let the closeness of being together start the initial healing. He knew they needed to talk about what had happened. And he knew that they needed to get Jamie to talk to them eventually, but he figured it was best to get him warm and dry before anything else. Besides, the shock of what he had been through and witnessed earlier probably hadn't worn off just yet, and he didn't want to push him in case he wasn't ready to talk. He wasn't even ready to talk about it yet. It was still so fresh and the frightening feeling was still simmering underneath his skin, so he could only imagine what Jamie must feel like.
"Let's get you out of these clothes, okay? Do you want to hit shower or do you want to take a bath?" Nathan asked Jamie as he lead them towards the stairs.
He stopped at the bottom of the stairs and turned slightly around when Jamie reluctantly let go of him.
"I don't know, I just want to get out of these cold clothes." Jamie said looking down, his body still shivering. He stayed still for a few seconds, before he slowly started to walk up the stairs.
Nathan followed him with his eyes for a second before he turned around to face Haley. She was standing right behind him hugging herself tightly, her lower lip tucked between her teeth. She met his gaze after a moment. He could see the pain swirling deep in her eyes behind a shining set of tears that hadn't stopped forming ever since they found them on the bridge. His chest ached even more knowing how scared she had been. How worried she still was.
He reached out and removed the hat she was still wearing, before he placed his hand on the small of her back. "You need to get out of these clothes too. I don't want you to get sick." He kissed the top of her head and brushed away a wet strand of hair that was stuck at her forehead.
"What if he…" She started in a shaking voice but Nathan cut her off, shaking his head.
"Don't do this to yourself, Hales." He looked at her with sad eyes and brushed his knuckles over her cheek. "He's here with us now, and he's going to be fine. We're going to make sure of that." He held her gaze and saw a fresh set of tears form in her eyes.
Haley closed her eyes for a second and felt Nathan wipe her cheek as the tears escaped the corner of her eyes. "I just don't know what I would've done if…" She stopped herself from completing the sentence, and took a shaking breath before she fluttered her eyes open.
"Come here." Nathan whispered and pulled her into his body. "He's still here. I'm here. And we're not going anywhere, okay?" He spoke softly into her hair. He felt her nod her head against his chest as she wrapped her arms around his torso, hugging him tightly.
They stood like that for another minute, just holding each other, before Nathan pulled back when he felt Haley shivering again.
"Now, come on. There's a hot bath waiting for you upstairs."
Haley released her arms from around him and wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand as she nodded her head.
Haley was standing in the bathroom watching the water slowly fill the bath tub. Her mind was reeling with all kinds of unpleasant thoughts. She knew Jamie was safe now, but the haunting images of her little boy standing in the middle of the road alone in the pouring rain was something that was hard to forget. The instant fright she had felt when she first saw him standing there was still making her feel uneasy. And she would never forget what he'd said once they were out of the car and by his side.
"I think Aunt Brooke is dead."
She remembered freezing right in that instant. It was like her entire body stopped working. A feeling of total paralysis. In that moment, the time and everything else around her stopped and there was nothing they could do other than simply stand there and watch Julian as he desperately tried to get her back to life. She could still hear his crying screams that cut right through her bones and into her very core. She had never felt so helpless and empty before as she did in that moment.
Having to witness your best friend basically being dead and then suddenly, in a miraculously way, come back to life was something that was going to sit with her for a long time.
She closed her eyes and shuddered, trying to will those horrifying images out of her mind. She had to focus on the good things now. Both Jamie and Brooke were okay. They were both safe now. But still, she couldn't help with all the 'what if's' that constantly kept floating around in the back of her mind. It made her lightheaded and restless.
"Hales?" She jumped slightly and clutched her hand above her beating heart before she turned around and gazed into Nathan's worried eyes.
Nathan let out a quiet sigh and walked towards her. He knew exactly what she was thinking and how she was torturing herself with the possibility of other outcomes after what happened tonight, and he was positive that none of them were of the good kind.
When he had closed the distance between them, he started to peel her jacket off of her shoulders, before he continued getting rid of the rest of her clothes. He kept undressing her in silence until she was down to her underwear. He could feel her eyes at him, and when he looked up and met her gaze she took a hold of the fabric of his sweater and pulled herself into his body.
"How's he doing?" She asked as she rested her head on his chest, feeling her anxiety start to subside when she felt his arms wrap around her.
"I think he's still pretty shocked about what happened. He didn't feel like talking much right now, so I just made sure he got out of his wet clothes and into the bath tub."
Haley tilted her head back and looked up at Nathan, her hands slipping through his arms and around his back. "He's going to be okay though, right?" She asked, worry tainting her voice.
Nathan nodded his head and cupped her cheek. "He's going to be fine, I know he is." He said with a reassuring smile while stroking his thumb across her cheekbone. "Now get your pregnant butt into that tub, before I throw you in myself." He quickly added and pecked her lips.
Haley couldn't help but laugh as she untangled her arms from around him and reached around to unclasp her bra. She halted for a second when she noticed Nathan was watching her. "What?"
Nathan looked intently at her and cupped her cheek. "I'm just incredibly happy that we're all okay after everything that happened tonight." He held her gaze and watched as she closed her eyes briefly before meeting his gaze again. "And I can't help the fact that I love watching my beautiful wife." He smiled at her and saw her cheeks starting to blush slightly.
He leaned down and kissed her cheek softly before he straightened up and quickly pulled his sweatshirt over his head and tossed it at the floor next to the pile of Haley's clothes.
"Just take all the time you need in here, baby. He didn't say it out loud, but I don't think Jamie wanted to be alone for too long at the time, so I'm gonna take a quick shower so I'll be ready for when he's done." He said as he walked towards the shower.
Haley felt her heart swell by the thoughtful man they were lucky enough to have in their lives. She smiled to herself as she removed the last set of clothing on her body and then stepped into the warm water. As she sunk into the water she sighed in delight and tried to free her mind of everything, as she felt the warm water quickly starting to do wonders to her cold body.
Haley walked into the bedroom feeling slightly better after getting her temperature back up again. The worst of the storm had finally passed, but she could hear that it was still raining lightly outside. She was about to walk out into the hallway, when she noticed Jamie laying in the middle of their bed.
"Hi, sweetie, where's your Dad?" She asked and walked around to her side of the bed and climbed in and slid her legs under the covers.
Jamie sat up and rubbed his eyes tiredly. "He's downstairs to get us some hot chocolate. He said it was okay that I could sleep in here tonight." He said and turned his head to look at his mother, silently asking for her permission as well.
Haley smiled softly at him and rubbed her hand over his head. "Of course you're sleeping in here tonight, baby. I would've brought you in here myself no matter what your Dad would've said." She said and placed a kiss at the top of his head.
"How are you doing? Did the bath make you feel a little better?" She asked and brushed her knuckles against his cheek.
"Yeah, at least I'm not cold anymore." He said and looked down as he started to fiddle with the fabric of the cover that was draped over his legs.
"Do you want to talk about what happened at the bridge tonight?" She asked carefully and watched him as he kept staring at his hands. She could see that he was struggling with himself and felt a tiny sting in her chest. All she wanted was to take his pain away and make him forget, but she knew that it was impossible to undo the things he'd been through and witnessed tonight. His young and innocent soul was already scarred, so she could only hope that he was willing to talk to them about it to lighten some of the darkness that had set around his heart.
When he didn't say anything for another minute, she scooted herself closer to him and placed a comforting hand on his arm. "It's okay if you're still scared, Jamie. I'm still scared." She spoke low and waited for him to say something when he looked up at her after her confession.
"You are?" He asked for conformation.
"Yes I am." She nodded her head at him. "Jamie, it's absolutely normal to feel scared after going through something like you did tonight. Not only were you in danger yourself, but you also witnessed someone you know and love almost die, and that's not something that goes away just like that. It takes time to heal, but that's why I think it's important to talk to someone about it instead of bottling it up inside of you." She looked intently at him and made sure he was listening to her. "It's okay if you don't feel like talking to me or your Dad, you can talk to anyone you'd like - your Aunt Quinn, Clay, Julian or maybe Aunt Brooke." She continued to talk, while she silently prayed that he would open up to them, but she still wanted him to know that he had other options in case he felt like he couldn't talk to them about it.
"Hey." She looked up and smiled softly when she saw Nathan walk into the room carrying a tray with three large mugs. He sat down at the edge of the bed and held the tray out for Jamie and Haley. "Careful, it's hot." He said as they both reached out to grab a mug.
"I even put marshmallows in it." Nathan said as he sat back and relaxed himself. "But only in your cup, Jamie, the pregnant lady shouldn't have too much sugar." He added and smiled playfully over at Haley that were mock gasping at him while Jamie started laughing.
"He's right, Mom. It's not good for the baby to have too much sugar." Jamie said and took another sip of his mug.
Nathan continued to smirk at Haley who was still narrowing her eyes at him with a playful glint.
"You are absolutely right, Jamie." She broke the staring contest she had with Nathan and looked down at Jamie before she continued. "And luckily for your Dad, marshmallows are not on the list of my cravings, so he's safe for now." She said in a teasing manner, yet with an underlying serious tone as she moved her eyes back at Nathan who fought hard to keep his laughter in.
Jamie moved his gaze between his parents and rolled his eyes. "You guys are weird."
"Let's just say that you should never cross your mother when she's pregnant, it could turn ugly." Nathan laughed and earned himself a tiny swat in the shoulder from Haley, who couldn't help but smile at the two of them.
Eventually the witty banter died down and the threesome continued drinking their hot chocolate in silence.
Jamie was the first to finish his drink, and placed it behind him before he scooted himself down in the bed between his parents. Haley let out a silent sigh as she watched him before she moved her eyes over at Nathan. She wanted to talk about what had happened, but she didn't quite know how to start the conversation back up again.
Nathan placed his mug behind him and nodded softly at Haley, knowing very well what she was asking of him. "How do you feel, buddy?" Nathan spoke low and looked down at Jamie.
"I thought I was going to die…" He started out after a moment of silence, his voice was barley over a whisper. "It was cold and I was stuck in that stupid seatbelt, and then when Julian showed up we thought that it was going to be okay."
Haley closed her eyes and felt her chest tighten as Jamie started talking. She quickly placed the mug behind the headboard at the small table, before she scooted down next to Jamie, placing a comforting hand at his chest.
"Then suddenly, there was a loud crash and we fell off the bridge and into the river. I didn't know what to do, water kept flowing into the car and Aunt Brooke got her leg stuck so she couldn't help me. But then Julian came and told us that we weren't sinking so we were safe and he was going to get us out."
Nathan clenched his hands into a fist by the thought of that jackass who hit them with his car and just took off. He swore silently to himself that he was going to find that bastard who did this, and he was going to pay the price for leaving his son and one of his best friends in the river just like that.
"What happened after that?" Haley asked quietly, her hand stroking his chest softly.
"I don't know, but more water suddenly started to fill the car, and Julian said that it was the levee that broke and that we didn't have much time."
Haley felt her eyes start to water and blinked quickly to hold the tears back.
"I was still stuck, and then Aunt Brooke told Julian to help me first. So he helped me out of the water before he went back in to help Aunt Brooke. I was really scared because I couldn't see them, and they were under the water for a long time…"
Haley swallowed the lump that formed in the back of her throat and gazed up at Nathan. His painful expression mirrored her own as they both listened to their son re-living the incidence from earlier.
Nathan placed his hand above Haley's hand laying on Jamie's chest and gave it a comforting squeeze as he breathed in deeply. He hated that Jamie had to experience something like this, and he hated how this affected Haley. He wished that he could take it all away. That he could erase this night and the painful memories from it that was going to stay with all of them for a long time. He hated how helpless he felt about all of it.
"I didn't know what to do, I was all alone and I kept screaming their names, but I don't think they could hear me since they were under the water." He paused for a second before he continued. "I felt relieved when I saw them coming up after a while, but when Julian carried Aunt Brooke out of the water and told me to wait at the end of the bridge I knew that something was wrong." Jamie turned quiet and blinked once.
Haley noticed the layer of tears that had formed in his eyes, and felt a single tear roll down her own cheek as her heart constricted by seeing her baby boy so broken.
"She didn't move. She was just laying there, and Julian kept screaming and yelling for her to wake up while he was doing CPR. And that's when you came…" He finished and closed his eyes.
"Oh, baby." Haley's voice broke as she leaned her forehead against Jamie's head, holding him close before she placed a soft kiss at the side of his head, gently rubbing his cheek.
"I'm sorry, Mom." He whispered and looked at Haley with tearful eyes.
"Hey, this is not your fault, Jamie. Don't ever think that, okay? You have nothing to be sorry about. You are the bravest little man I know." Haley said and pulled him into her body.
"But I should've listened to you when you said that you wanted me to ride home with you guys." He mumbled into her chest as she still held him tightly into her body.
Nathan placed his hand on Jamie's back and rubbed it up and down in a soothing manner. "Jamie, no one could've predicted that this was going to happen, so don't think about that now. I don't want you to dwell and think about what you could've done differently. Yes, maybe then this wouldn't have happened to you, but unfortunately we can't go back and change the time, so the important thing to focus on now is that you are safe and you are still here with us, okay?"
"Okay." He nodded as Haley let go of him so he could roll onto his back again.
Haley carefully wiped away the tears from his cheeks, before she wiped away her own tears. Her heart was still aching for her little boy. He was still frightened by what had happened, and she couldn't blame him. No one should ever have to go through something like this. She only hoped that he would heal from this sooner rather than later.
"Is Aunt Brooke really going to be okay?" Jamie asked after a moment.
"She's going to be fine. I got a text from Julian when I was downstairs earlier. They released her from the hospital, so she's home now. We're all going to be fine." Nathan said and brushed his hand over his blonde locks. He moved his gaze from Jamie over at Haley and nodded softly at her.
"Why don't you try to get some sleep, huh?" He added when he heard Jamie yawn, before he too scooted down next to him and kissed the top of his head. "I love you, son. We'll be right here."
"Okay. I love you, too." Jamie said and buried himself deeper into the mattress and closed his eyes.
It didn't take long before his body succumbed to sleep, and Haley was thankful for that. He needed all the rest that he could get. Unfortunately for her, sleep wouldn't come as easily. Her mind was reeling with everything Jamie had told them, and what they had witnessed themselves. She knew she shouldn't torture herself with all of this, cause like Nathan had said, they couldn't go back and change the time. But as a mother she would always worry, no matter what.
She slowly opened her eyes when she felt Nathan take a hold of her hand that she had draped across Jamie's torso. She met his calm, blue eyes and instantly felt a little lighter.
"I can't thank you enough for being so amazing tonight, Nathan." She whispered and intertwined their fingers. "Your strength is what's holding me together. I don't know what I'd do without you."
Nathan smiled softly at her. "You're so much stronger than you think you are, Hales. I was probably just as scared as you were tonight, if not even more, but no matter what, I will always be here for you. All three of you. You're my world and that is never going to change." He lifted their hands and placed a soft kiss at the top of her knuckles.
Haley's chest warmed by his endless love and consideration. He never ceased to amaze her, and she didn't think that it was possible to love someone so much that it hurt even after so many years together. But she did. She loved him unconditionally and she knew that she would always feel this way. He was her everything.
"I love you, Nathan Scott." She said as she looked intently into his eyes. "He's going to get through this, right? I mean, where do we even go from here?" She asked as once again, worry started to crawl under her skin.
"I'm positive that he's going to be more than fine. He's a tough kid." He reassured and nuzzled her hand against his cheek before leaving another kiss at her soft skin. "You try to get some sleep too, okay baby? Then we'll take it one step at the time when we wake up tomorrow."
Haley smiled softly at him and nodded before she snuggled herself as close as she she could get into Jamie. Nathan rolled over to his back and laid Haley's hand on his chest before covering it with his own. His fingers kept stroking soothingly over the skin of her arm as he laid there thinking about what tomorrow would bring. The only thing he knew was that it was going to take time, but at least they were all still here, safe and sound, and they would get through this the way they always did. By simply being there for each other. That was their strength. Always and forever.
AN; It's been forever since I last posted something, so it was about time, I know. And this was yet another thing Mark chose to skip during the show, so thanks to my own personal "idea-feeder" (you know who you are), I at least tried to give the night after the bridge some justice. But it was a challenge to write this, so I hope it came out somewhat okay. And please forgive me for any mistakes/typos. It's getting late over here.
Thanks for reading, and feel free to leave a few words.