The Thrilling Conclusion

(Wow, frankly I'm surprised this thing still gets noticed. Guess I owe you all a final part so here goes. Hope that it lives up to the other three.)

Rei made his way out of the shattered mech, still with the taste of Nagisa in his mouth and his blood on his chest. He gazed up at the towering unholy abomination that now blocked out the horizon, and an inhuman rage filled him. The rage of loss. A rage so white hot and pure that it transcended his human form.

Harulhu let out an unearthly cackle over the body of his opponent. He was motherfucking invincible! Not even goddamn Pacific Rim mechs could beat him! Soon he would flood the world so he and his beloved water could be together forever. He looked down and saw that one of the fucking ants had gotten out of his tin can. How pathetic, he would stamp out the last worthless insect. He raised his foot above the demolished mech and slammed down with several tons of force, crushing it with a satisfying crunch. But suddenly he felt an unexpected resistance, as if something was pushing back against his weight. This could not be! He was Harulhu! An all powerful creature of the sea! Nothing was stronger then him! Was it just him or was the ground getting closer?

Amid the broken shards of metal and wires of the mech stood Rei, but something was different about him. He radiated with palpable energy, his hair had become a bright blond and beneath his ripped shirt you could make out a distinct 8 or 10 pack abs. Rei had become super saiyan! As Harulhu slammed his massive foot into the ground, Rei raised his powerful arms and with great effort flipped the colossal monster on it's face. The horror got up from the ground, still shocked that a mere mortal had the strength to flip him so easily. Rei put his hands together and released a ball of energy shouting "HADOUKEN!"

"That is not Dragon Ball Z you choad, that is Street Fighter!" cried Harulhu before he was struck by the ball of energy and sent flying back on his ass several hundred feet.

"Whatever I didn't watch Dragon Ball Z when I was a kid," said Rei. "I'm still going to kick your ass!"

"Bring it on you posser bitch!" said Harulhu.

"Come at me bro!" Rei flew at the the creature, his fists outstretched and ready to kill the beast. But this time Haruhlu was ready for him. He raised his hand and batted away the saiyen, sending Rei crashing through a building. But before Harulhu could react, Rei came speeding through the rubble and punched him in the face.

As Haruhlu flew through the air, he had an uncharacteristic moment of self awareness and personal realization. Rei was just like him, an avatar of rage brought about by the violent loss of life of a loved one. The more he thought about it, the more he became convinced that this parallel was by design to teach him that if he was not careful he could unintentionally inflict the same kind of pain to others as had been inflicted to himself, and that he should become more aware of how his actions as to not cause unintentional harm. But as his massive body hit the ground he realized fuck that, this is just a fight between a Lovecraftian horror and a super saiyen. No greater meaning or overarching theme, just two badasses duking it out in the ruins of a small Japanese town.

As Rei made his way to the body of the fallen titan, Harulhu got up and said "Wait, stop! We need not fight! Look I'm sorry about what I did to Nagisa! Just a few hours ago I was in the same position as you. I had to watch as Rin gunned down the one thing I cared most about in this world. In that moment I was filled with such anger and hatred that I became the monster you see before you. I cannot take back the lives that I took today, but together we can ensure that no more lives are needlessly thrown away. What do you say, truce?"

Rei considered the beast for a moment, and then whispered something inaudible.

"I'm sorry I did not hear what you said," asked Harulhu.

"I said," replied Rei, "SUPRISE COCKFAG!" And with one mighty uppercut took Harulhu's head clean off.

Rei fell to his knees, his tears mixing with the blood spewing from the monsters carcass. He had done it. He had avenged Nagisa and killed the eldritch abomination, but he realized there was nothing that he could do to bring him back. Or was there?

"I am getting rid of what stands between our love," said Rin, choking back a tear as he pointed his gun at the ocean.

"Rin, don't do this!" cried Haru.

"You must understand Haru, we must do things for love, you will understand someday Haru, and when you do we can finally be together!" said Rin as he leveled the gun at the ocean. Then suddenly Rei appeared.

"Put the gun down Rin," said Rei calmly.

"REI!?" cried Rin and Haru in unison. "How did you get here?" asked Haru. "And why are you blond now?" asked Rin.

"It is a long story," replied Rie. "Suffice it to say that some weird shit goes down, Haru kills everyone, I become a super siyen and kill Haru, then I go back in time to prevent this stupid shit from going down by flying around the world so fast that time goes backwards like Goku in Dragon Ball Z."

"You're thinking of Superman, not Goku," said Haru.

"Whatever same thing!" replied Rei exasperated. "I did not watch that show when I was a kid."

"So what happens now?" asked Rin.

"Well first off, I'm going to take that gun away from you Rin," said Rei as he snached the pistol away from Rin and chucked it into the ocean. "Then I going to have hot super saiyen sex with Nagisa, and guys can do whatever the fuck you want. I don't really care." And with that Rei zoomed off into the horizon.