Takes place after Marco (Thatch and Ace) leaves the crew and back on board.
Thatch's POV
I have zero clue what that awesome-less loser was doing.
Should I be involve?
I had to think carefully over that question. Last time I got involve with Ace, not in that way, I was stuck in a one-man boat with him for more than a week.
Only got an orange pair of panties out of it.
Well, that didn't stop me from walking over there and staring over his shoulder. "What the hell are you doing?" In front of him was a pineapple. "Marco?"
"Idiot! This isn't Marco!" Ace uttered, "But...it does look like it doesn't it? Here," he grabbed a tube of lipstick, I always knew he was into that type of stuff, and made a mouth on the pineapple. "Perfect!"
Wait...wasn't that Izou's? HELL! I BROUGHT THAT PINEAPPLE FOR DESSERT! And those markers...those were Jozu's (I have no idea why that giant has them in the first place).
"Maybe ask Pops to replace him with this. No one would know the differences." Except those people who brought the materials to make this imposter.
"Nah, I'm doing something else."
I narrowed my eyes at him. If he wasn't doing that, then I had no fuckin' clue what was going on in his mind. "Then what? Are you going to make out with it? Again?"
"Mama Hen is."
I sighed, "You lost me."
"Are you going Zoro on me?"
Note: we when were...searching for Mama Hen, we met a Mosshead bounty hunter who could enter a room with one entrance and somehow end up on the other side of the ship. "Aren't you?"
After doing a few finishing touches on the pineapple, he lifted it up from the ground. "THIS! Is Marco's new girlfriend!"
Better play along.
"He won't notice the difference from your hot beautiful sister."
SLAP
"HAVEN'T I TOLD YOU WE WERE GORGEOUS! NOT BEAUTIFUL!"
"Have you been talking to that goldfish again?"
"He has a name."
"What? Seaking Jr?"
"Seaking Sr."
I rolled my eyes.
"Just wait. I'm calling this MATE-MARCO-WITH-HIS-OWN-KIND-BEFORE-HE-MATES-WITH-MY-SISTER-PLAN-B! THAT SHOULD SHOW THAT MOTHERFUCKER!"
"You are still afraid of that sisterfucker?"
His face darken as he turned and glared at me. If I didn't know about his Seaking army being a goldfish, I would have ran for it.
Thanks to his ignorance rubbed off on me...I stayed and watched as it unfolded.
Ace took a hold of the Marco-look-alike-girl and started climbing to Marco's nest, the Crow-nest. Ace climbed and laid the pineapple in the window. Even from here I could hear his girl-voice. "Hello fellow."
"I think my ears are melting..." I muttered.
"It happens to the best of us," Izou shook his head and looked on the ground. He gasped, "My lipstick!"
...
Ace's POV
Course, this was going to work. Even Thatch couldn't tell the difference between my amazing artwork on a pineapple to Marco.
My epic plan was...GET MARCO LAID! He already had a nest, so all he needed was someone of his own kind. Meet Pinekin. The girl of his dreams. He should be glad that I'm doing all of this work for him. I went out of my way to create his soul mate, and even added a bow! My finest piece ever.
"Hello fellow~" I voiced the pineapple. It was resting in the window.
I already knew that perverted bastard was inside, nesting or roasting; whatever flame chickens did. Hell, he probably already made a nest in my sister's room.
OH GOD!
FUCKIN' BASTARD! NO WONDER I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU!
"Eh?" came from within the room.
See, I told ya he would fall for it. Thanks to my amazing skills; nothing can even compare to them. "So Pineapple, what about we get together, huh? Forget about that gorgeous girl, she's way out of our league. Plus, you don't want me-Ace on you. He will burn you to hell. Have you heard about his amazing skills? You should be glad that you are still alive, yoi. And, I heard, he planning on selling you to an auction house if you misbehave again,yoi"
He was so into it that it left him speak-less. Hell, I bet by the end of the day, these two would be getting marry. I will be the best man...while...Thatch would be...one of the chairs for Whitebeard.
And my cute adorable little sister would be no where in sight!
This is going perfect!
"Plus, don't you want to get laid? Huh, baby?" After this, I'm going to soak my mouth with seawater...or was it wash my tongue with shampoo?
"Ace!"
I looked down at that awesome-less loser, Thatch. "What?! Can't you seen I'm being amazing?!"
"Marco already climbed out."
"WHAT?!" I stretched my head inside. Marco and his nest was gone! WHAT HAS THE WORLD GONE TO!
And...somehow I ended up falling backwards and landing on top of a crying Izou...and now he's out to kill me.
...
"He moved his nest back into his room."
I stepped into the room, only a hammock in the corner, and placed a certain...artwork on the other side of his head. "Sweet dreams you too!"
I stepped out of the room and placed a 'Do Not Disturb' on his doorknob.
He's going to thank me one of these days.
...
"WHAT THE HELL?!" Marco's screamed throughout the ship.
I smiled. Finally Marco got laid.
"He still got laid with your sister."
"PROVE IT!"
...
Four years later...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
She had A FUCKIN' BABY!
Luckily, he taken after my looks. I would hate if it was another pineapple...I still needed to remove the last one.
END OF BONUS!
Okay...I was reading through my old stories, and I was bored...so I thought...why don't I make another bonus. Sorry if Ace seemed less crazy than last chapters (been a while since I wrote crazy Ace...so forgive me). Thanks for all of the support! This is one of my favorite stories I've written!