What if?

Chapter 1

Stuck in a rut and a fatal wish

-Flashback-

"Miroku!" she giggled as he carried her into their new hut, "I can walk you know!"

The happy groom grinned at her, "walk? MY woman does not walk! I will carry you everywhere!" he declared happily and spun her as he carried her like a princess.

Sango let out another giggle, "don't be ridiculous! I'm dizzy now so put me down now, come on" she blushed madly.

This did not go unnoticed by her husband who kissed one warm and rosy cheek, "you have my word, Sango…I will take care of you forever."

Sango smiled contently and rested her head on his shoulder, "I hope that's a promise you intend to keep…my good monk."

-End of flashback-

It had been five years since they destroyed Naraku. Five years as a married couple, they had twin daughters, Misa and Miwa who were over four years old and a son, Kimori, aged two. Their friend Kagome had returned to them two years ago the day after the birth of their son and was now carrying a child that would certainly call them Aunt Sango and Uncle Miroku.

Everything was supposedly perfect now, yet every morning he woke to the same demands from his wife;

"Miroku! Did you fix that leak? You said you would…can you do it properly this time? If you do it right the first time then you won't have to keep fixing it!"

And

"Miroku! Kimori needs to feeding, get up and feed him already!"

And

"Miroku! I really need your help here! Miroku! Wake up you lazy lecher!"

Today was no different; her shrill voice roused him from his sleep to see her standing before him. Her hair was everywhere and had pieces of food stuck in it, her clothes covered in stains…everything she owned always got dirty and no matter how many times she washed them the stains never came out. The bags under her eyes were deep and dark, the look in them was furious. His wife looked a mess!

Now most mornings he would smile at her despite her glare, he would rise to his feet and give a bright and cheerful response, "Yes my dear Sango" he would say "your wonderful husband is at your service!"

But these past couple of months had really taken their toll. He and Inuyasha had been travelling for weeks at a time, exorcizing demons, purging evil spirits from pure bodies. Was it so much to ask that when he returned that he came home to a wife all prettied up and smiling? That his children behave and allowed him to sleep in? Apparently so, because yet again here he was being woken up by a nagging wife who looked crazed and annoyed.

"Miroku! Are going to sleep in all morning? You said you'd get up early and chop some wood for us for later! It's starting to get cold in here at night now, please get up!" she pleaded as she scraped her fingers through her matted hair.

I used to love running my fingers through her hair, when it soft like silk…this year…she's really let herself go these past few months.

Next thing he knew, his kids came bounding past their mother, all of them screaming and jumping. Kimori was still walking clumsily and fell down; there was a slight pause before there was a huge intake of breath and then he released a loud cry.

Miroku just sat there as the twins pulled at each arm of his, both of them demanding his attention. Sango held the crying two year old, trying to calm him.

"Daddy, can you take us to the stream?" Miwa asked.

"No, no! Daddy, take us to the forest!" Misa argued, next thing they were bickering using just one word each.

"Forest!"

"Stream!"

Forest, stream, forest, stream…Kimori won't stop crying! Sango won't stop nagging! Why can't everyone Just….Just… "BE QUIET!" he yelled, his voice echoed all around the small hut, causing his family to stop and stare at him for a moment.

They were stunned that the usually pleasant and placid man of the house raised his voice so loud at them.

He felt their eyes all on him and he grew more irritated, especially by the look Sango was giving him. She had this way of making him feel guilty, but what did he do wrong? All he wanted was some peace and quiet!

"I'm going out for a bit, I'll be back when I've cooled off…" he informed them and walked away out of the hut.

He could hear the children suddenly erupt with so many questions and Sango trying to make up all kinds of excuses for him.

Ooooooo

There was nowhere else for him to go; he just strolled towards Kagome and Inuyasha's hut. Along the way he was greeted by his old friend, Shippo.

"Hey Miroku, why do you look so annoyed, is everything okay at home?" he asked me, his voice was so bright and cheery; it was like nails on a chalkboard this morning.

"I'm fine Shippo" the monk assured shortly.

The little fox demon frowned at him, completely unconvinced, "if you say so" he replied "you mind if I come with you to Kagome and Inuyasha's house?"

I shrugged "very well" he sighed, he hopped onto his friend's shoulder and the two continued walking.

As they continued on they walked past Keade 's home, a twelve year old Rin was sweeping outside the hut. "Good morning master Miroku, good morning Shippo!" she greeted waving eagerly.

Though Shippo greeted her with the same enthusiasm, even the innocent smile of that little thirteen year old girl wasn't enough to brighten Miroku's morning.

Eventually they came to their friends' home. Kagome was sorting through her little garden of herbs. She was four months pregnant and just starting to show. She saw the monk and fox demon and a smile swept across her face.

"Miroku! Shippo! So nice to see you, come in I'll make some tea" she welcome, "Where is Sango and the kids?"

Miroku winced with irritation, why is it every time Sango and I are apart they ask where she and our children are? I'm allowed to be by myself! "At home!" he answered.

Kagome was taken aback by his sharp tone, this isn't like Miroku at all, I wonder what's going on with him and Sango? She thought to herself.

Inuyasha came in carrying firewood on his shoulder, "Hey Kagome!" he called, "I chopped the wood for ya!"

Kagome smiled, "Thanks Inuyasha, now have some well-earned tea with us! You're home much later than usual, it usually doesn't take you long at all, but at least you're here now."

The mention of the chopped wood made Miroku cringe, that's what Sango was asking him to do this morning. Give it a few years my friend; you'll probably be where I'm at now.

When Inuyasha saw Miroku he frowned, "Hey bozo! What'dya think you're doing? You better get yourself home, Sango looked upset."

The monk's breath hitched and averted his gaze; he wanted to ask if she was crying, he wanted to run to her immediately. But he had come all this way and doing that would prove that he had done something wrong and he refused to admit fault, all he wanted was a peaceful morning.

Kagome of course leapt on that "what do you mean? When did you see her and why is she upset?"

Shippo glared at the monk "did Miroku flirt with another girl?" he accused.

"I did not!" He responded in his own defence, "and I'll have you know I haven't so much as looked at another woman since Sango and I married!"

Kagome ignored him prodded at Inuyasha who went on to explain, "I went out to get some firewood, I found Sango out there too. She looked really upset, she got Rin to watch the kids while she did something Miroku promised to do for her. She then just kept muttering how she needs to get this done, otherwise the kids would be cold all night. Anyway, I got her to sit down while I finished chopping wood for the both of us and then helped her carry it home, that's why I'm late."

The image of Sango chopping the wood played on her husband's mind; she already looked so tired this morning. He also pictured the look on his children's faces when he did not come back to take them to the stream or forest. He always loved taking them out and having fun…just not today.

Kagome glared at him "Why did you just get up and leave her? You're not acting like yourself today, what's going on?"

Miroku sighed, he was just having a bad day, wasn't he allowed to have those? Why did he always have to the cheerful and light-hearted one? After all he'd been through, hadn't he earned a day of moodiness?

Inuyasha bonked him on the head "go home monk! Your wife is waiting"

Miroku gritted his teeth, "I'll go home when I'm ready Inuyasha!" and with that he stormed out of the hut. He ignored his instinct to head home to his wife; he would not admit defeat this time.

Every day is the same now, when I'm not out catching demons with Inuyasha. There was a time I woke up not knowing what the day would bring or where I'd be travelling to. Now every day was the same…demanding children, nagging wife and boring chores. I love my family, more than anything…but I'm tired of being stuck in a rut.

Ooooo

It was late afternoon now, Sango had fed and washed her children and laid them down for a quick nap. She was exhausted and even though she wanted to take a nap herself, the hut was in need of a good clean. The former demon slayer hadn't even really eaten herself yet, all she was able to get was a few mouthfuls of rice at lunch because the children decided it was perfectly okay to start a food fight.

With a sigh she got on with the house work, Rin offered to stay and help her out when Sango got back from chopping firewood, but she wanted to the young girl to have fun being a child while she still could and politely declined and insisted she go explore some more.

As she cleaned and dusted, she accidentally knocked something. With her lightening reflexes she caught the object with ease, only to discover it was Hiraikotsu. Seeing the weapon she once wielded with such pride and strength.

"One day, when the girls are old enough….I will teach them how to use this weapon, I will teach them everything my father taught me….and Hiraikotsu will again see battle" she said to herself and hugged the giant boomerang close to her. All those memories came flooding back, this thing was so precious to her, it was like a part of her. However she remembered the day she sacrificed it to save her beloved monk. She'd do it all again, because even though he behaved like an idiot this morning…she loved him. Loved him, loved him, loved him…heart and soul.

He's an idiot…but he's my idiot.

Sango finished cleaning up and then moved on to sewing and re-patching some of her old clothes, "what I wouldn't give for a new yukata or kimono…a nice evening one…for special occasions." She said aloud.

At which point her husband returned, he didn't look any happier still and this bugged her. I gave him the whole day to cool off! I didn't even do anything! I should have slapped him this morning!

"You missed lunch" she informed him icily and continued with what she was doing. "I could have really used your help; the kids were so energetic today. Where have you been?"

He sighed and sat down by the table "could I get some tea please?" he asked.

That was it! She was in such a rage, "make it yourself!" she shouted and threw the clothes she was sewing at him. "I don't care if you're in a bad mood! I'm not your servant I'm your wife! Have you forgotten just who you married, Monk? Why have you been like this? For four months you've been a complete misery, Miroku what's going on with you?"

He didn't even look at her, truth was he couldn't because deep down he realised how unfair he was being but he too stubborn.

"Every day is the same…my life has become so ordinary! I feel stuck…trapped." He answered truthfully.

Sango's eyes turned wide, "is that what life with me is to you? Ordinary? You feel stuck with me? I've trapped you, is that it?" she spoke over a huge lump in her throat that felt like the size of a plum.

Miroku closed his eyes, "You're twisting my words now, and you're taking it the wrong way"

"How else am I meant to take it Miroku?" the tears fell freely now, they fell like diamonds…precious gems he once promised would only be formed from the joy he brought her. "If that's how you feel…then just leave, I can cope just fine on my own!"

She regretted the word immediately and would have given anything to swallow them down again, but she couldn't they were up in the air.

Miroku's stomach tightened, he winced at her words but luckily she had her back to him and she didn't see this. I don't want to leave, Sango, I promised to take care of you forever. I'm trying my best. He wouldn't respond and sometimes it hurts more when silence greets such a sweeping statement.

"You forgot" he heard her whimper, he couldn't see her face even still. "You forgot your promise! You think I like looking like this? Tired because I'm always down late and up early, thin because I hardly have time to eat, weak because I hardly train? I was a demon slayer….a demon slayer! Strong and resilient…sometimes Miroku….I wish that I never fell in love with you"

They both near gasped at this; Sango didn't mean it…not a single syllable of it. She was just hurt because of his behaviour, she wanted him to be his usual smiley self.

Before she could turn and apologise and swear she didn't mean it, her husband was out the door, so angry with her and in an even worse mood than before.

She stood frozen for a moment then released her frustration with a short scream, "all I wanted was some firewood! All I wanted was for him to say something sweet and romantic!"

To calm herself she went to check on her sleeping angels. They were half her and half Miroku and even though a lot of people had told them they resemble their mother the most, Sango herself saw the more subtle resemblances of their father. He was in Kimori's smile, the twinkle of Miwa's eye and the sigh Misa made when she finished a good laugh.

Sleep sounds really good now, and she curled up on the bed with them, just a little nap with them. He loves us….he does, he'll be back and when he does,everything will be okay.

Oooooo

Does she really wish that? He wondered, does she really wish she never fell in love with me? It hurt that she said that to him, she was the woman he loved more than anything, she was the mother of his children, the children he'd wanted for so long. He was upon a hill top looking upon the setting sun, contemplating.

"Maybe it would have been better if she never fell for me" he said to himself, "maybe it would have been better for her…for both of us! Maybe we should have just stayed close friends!" he then stood to his feet.

The clouds began to circle and threated the release a dark and cold rain upon him, the sky grumbled. "I wish Sango had never fallen for me!" he declared to the heavens as the rain fell.

ooooo

His voice echoed over the village and reached the ears of his wife who woke to it. Something told her she needed to get to him, quickly! A foreboding presence was felt all around her, something supernatural had come.

"Sango, did Miroku come back?" asked the fox demon as he was being carried in by Kagome.

Sango just rushed past them, almost knocking them down, "Please watch the children!" she asked as she ran.

"Sango wait!" Kagome yelled after her, "There's a storm brewing out there! It could be dangerous!"

The former demon slayer ignored them, her husband needed her. Miroku, what have you done?

Ooooo

What have I done? He asked himself as the thunder clashed where his feet were. He fell back and then as the smoke cleared and the rain fell, he was cast in the shadow of a tall and broad man.

"Who are you?" the monk demanded and got to his feet, he pointed his staff at him. The man was tall and broad, his hair and eyes dark…his jaw strong and nose straight. He had facial hair that was thick on his well-aged face. What was more interesting was that he wore similar attire to Sango in her demon slaying years.

The man knelt over him, "I am Shouji….I am the clan leader of the demon tribe…and the father of Sango and Kohaku." Behind him the thunder clashed as then too stood to his feet, not at all intimidated by his son-in-law.

Miroku recognised him now; he looked like Kohaku in years to come. But why had he journeyed here from the underworld?

"It is good to meet you" Miroku confessed, but still he was stern, "but still, what is your business in this world?"

Shouji frowned and pushed the staff away, "I'm here to grant your wish….I have been sent by the gods to make it so my daughter never loved you. Something I am more than happy to do…you're not good enough for her!"

Miroku began to panic, "What? No! I didn't mean it…please don't I want to stay with Sango! Please!"

But it was too late, he had made his mistake and Sango's father was not a forgiving man, not when it came to his daughter.

A red hurricane like thing hovered above; it came to take him to a world where he and Sango did not get their happy ever after.

"Miroku!" he heard Sango cry, he looked over his shoulder to see she was running to him.

"Sango!" he called back and ran towards her.

I have to get to her, I have to get to her and not let go! Sango! Their arms outstretched towards each other. But just as their fingertips brushed, Sango was swept away by the red hurricane.

"Miroku!" she screamed, "what's happening?"

"Sango! I'll save you!" he yelled up as he leapt into the air to save his woman. He managed to get her hand to which he held on for dear life, but a second hurricane came and took hold of him too and the coupled was wrenched apart.

They screamed for each other till their lungs were sore….all went black and the scene ended there.

Ooooo

His head felt as though it was full rocks, hard and heavy rocks as sharp as knife. He groaned as he sat up and rubbed his head.

"Sango" he called by instinct, she would always rub his head when it ached, but then he recalled what had happened and scurried to his feet, "Sango!" he called again with more alarm. He looked all around him. He was on the hill top where he was before, the sky and all was clear.

Did I just fall asleep and have an awful nightmare? I hope so…really, really hope so! He sprinted towards the village. He wanted to hold them simultaneously, his wife and his children…he needed them in his arms that very moment!

Just as he entered the village he was greeted by a hoard of women. "Monk Miroku!" they all cheered in happiness to see him, all grabbing at him.

He jumped over them to avoid them and they all looked so sad at this, "good monk" one of them whimpered, "have we done something to displease you? All we want is to bear your children!"

They all crowded him and some were so beautiful…but then in all their faces he saw hints of Sango, one had the same nose, another had similar eyes and another had the same hair colour. The ones who looked nothing at all like her, he compared them. Sango's eyes are much more sparkly, Sango would never wear so much perfume, and Sango's lips are much pinker!

Sango was all that was on her mind, he heard children laughing and three other names sprung in his head. Misa, Miwa…Kimori! He pushed past them all, they were grabbing at him. There was time he'd have loved this attention, but now he was a father and husband above all else and his lecherous instincts were easily overcome by the instincts of a family man.

"Hey hold up monk! What are you up to?" came the gruff voice of his best friend, the half demon. Miroku was so glad to see him.

"Inuyasha it's you!" he almost cheered.

Inuyasha frowned sceptically, "not your usual reaction when I pry you from women, what's wrong are they finally more than you can handle?"

Miroku blinked at him then pulled away from his grip, "what do you mean? I don't do this anymore, I'm a husband and father!"

Inuyasha rolled his eyes, "Are you kidding me? Don't tell that you suckered some poor girl into marrying you and actually bearing your child!"

The monk's head spun, "Yes I did and you know her! It's Sango!"

Inuyasha's eyes turned wide and he stared at Miroku as though he had completely lost his mind. "Sango? Have you hit your head or something? Sango wouldn't marry a pervert like you, where is all this coming from? Since when did you like Sango?"

Miroku was about to answer but then came the voice of his other dear friend, Kagome. "He's always loved her Inuyasha, you can be so dense, I can't believe you haven't noticed." She spoke, she was holing both hands on her rising stomach, she was still four months with child so not everything has changed.

Miroku could have kissed her fiercely on the cheek for this; he grabbed her by the shoulders, "Kagome! Tell him, tell him that Sango and I are married, tell him that while you were gone we had three kids together, twin girls and a little boy! Tell him, Kagome, tell him!" he pleaded so desperately.

But even looked at him in puzzlement now, "Miroku…I've known that you've loved her for so long now, but you never told her. For five years, you've just gone from woman to woman."

I won't believe this! "No! That can't be true! Where is she, where is Sango? She'll tell you!"

They actually appeared quite worried for their friend, Shippo popped too now, "Miroku, are you okay?" he asked.

"Shippo! Where's Sango?" the monk demanded.

Shippo hid behind Inuyasha, "Sango? She doesn't live, we visited her last week…she promised to visit soon though."

Miroku grabbed to his hair in frustration, "What do you mean she doesn't live here? We have a hut together, the twins and Kimori were born there you all come over all the time!"

Again all they did was stare at him, "Miroku" Kagome stepped forward using softest tone her voice could conjure, "you're starting to scare me,"

Inuyasha folded his arms, "we can't go back now, like Shippo said we just visited and given her position now, we can't just go over when we please no matter how much we want to or however much she would like us to."

Her position? What position? What's become of Sango?

"Oh no" Kagome groaned, "The poor boy can have such bad timing."

Miroku looked up to see who she met, his heart leapt with joy when he saw his brother-in-law come flying down on Kirara, Sango's former companion who she graciously gave to Kohaku.

"Brother!" Mirkou hollered as he jumped at the sixteen year old boy and held him in a brotherly manner.

"Huh? Monk Miroku, why do you call me brother? Have you been drinking?" he asked.

Miroku held him at arm's length, "I call you brother because I am by marriage…where is Sango?"

Kohaku blinked, "Um…Kirara and I just came back from visiting her and her husband, she seems well….sorry how are you my brother by marriage?"

The monk was getting so agitated now, "No, I'm her husband Kohaku! I am!"

Kohaku backed away, "sorry, but I don't know what you're saying, but you're not her husband. She lives with her lord Husband in a castle, she's kind of like princess now I guess, she married really well and he's a nice guy too."

Miroku's expression turned dark, "Who is he?" he growled, "who is this husband?"

Kagome laid her hand on his shoulder, "You know him, we all consider him a friend…its Kuranosuke….Kuranosuke Takeda, Lord of the Takeda clan. Sango promised to return and marry him after we defeated Naraku, it was a beautiful story actually, he never gave up waiting for her. I told you that you should have told her how you feel, you didn't listen Miroku and you can't go back now, Sango just didn't fall for you, it's time to move on."

He pulled away and started running, he still remembered the way…he'd run all the way there and see for himself. It can't be true! This couldn't have really happened, I didn't truly wish for this!

I was on the outskirts when a voice stopped me, "going to her won't change anything you know."

I skidded to a stop, it was her father, hasn't done enough? "I don't care!" Miroku argued, "I will find Sango and put all this right! She'll believe me; I know there is some part of her that has always loved me! Otherwise why would I still love her?"

Shouji shook his head, "No, you wished that she had never fallen for you and she hasn't, otherwise everything else has remained exactly the same as before. Just because Sango never fell in love with you, doesn't mean you didn't fall for her, you didn't wish for that. Did you really think the only reason you fell in love with Sango was because she fell for you?"

Miroku shook his head, "no, I know the many reason why I fell in love with Sango. She's brave, beautiful, devoted, loyal, compassionate, understanding, loving and true! Those are only a few, I could easily think of a thousand more! Please, sir….I swear to you I love your daughter….give me a chance to prove that to you and then change it all back to how it was!"

Shouji held his chin as he thought for a moment, "very well, prove you're worthy of my only daughter and the underworld will grant you with another wish….what you do with that wish is up to you, but you may be surprised with what you want in the end."

Miroku was determined, "there is only one thing I want! My family back…I want them all back and I will have them again! I swear to you, I will hear Misa's laugh, smell Miwa's hair, hear Kimori's laugh and feel Sango's embrace once again! Don't forget Shouji…like you, I am a father and husband and we both know the lengths men of our kind will go for our family!"

Shouji could not hide that he was momentarily impressed by the Monk's speech but would need more convincing than that.

"Very well" agreed the dead man, "I will take you there…the rest is up to you."

ooooo

With that he took Miroku and the two vanished into the thin air. They appeared in the blink of an eye outside the Takeda castle.

"Now…no one else can hear or see me" Shouji informed, "so when I appear to you in public, try not to look insane."

Miroku nodded and walked up to the guards, "Please allow me entrance I need to speak with the lady Sango."

The guards sneered at him, "We can't let you in unless you have been invited by a member of the Takeda clan." One of them refused.

Miroku sighed, "Apparently I am a very good friend of theirs…the lady Sango especially."

The guards would not budge, "you're not getting in monk, so turn and leave…"

He was again about to protest when he was cut off by the sweetest voice of all.

"It's alright, he's with me" she said.

It was as though time had slowed as he turned to see Sango behind him. She was carrying flowers and was accompanied by many female attendants, also carrying flowers. Sango was dressed beautifully, make-up on her face and her hair placed up in a nice style. She looked completely different from the tired run down wife he had seen this morning, she was glowing with pride and excellence.

"My lady" the guards greeted urgently and bowed.

Sango giggled and stepped closer to the monk and sweetly handed him one of the flowers. "It's good to see you, Miroku, come inside…you must have something urgent to discuss if you came back after only a week since your last visit, especially without Inuyasha and the others."

He wanted so desperately to reach out and touch her face, but he couldn't.

Sango…I'll make this all right again Sango…I promise, we'll have our family again!

Thanks for reading, Chapter two will be along shortly.