Hi readers, it's been a really long time- almost a year since I wrote a fanfic. Sorry about that. If you haven't read my last two fanfictions you can find them on my page. This fanfic I started yesterday and is based on the first Delirium book where instead of escaping to the wilds Lena is cured after being caught at 37 Brookes. Thank you all for your continued support I am so grateful. Have a read of this and let me know what you think and if it's worthwhile I'll update again soon. Thanks again

1.

Thoughts raced through my frightened mind, one after the other; a never ending train of thoughts. I gripped the edge of the steel table and tried to relax my breathing by counting to one hundred, praying that was enough time to collect focus my thoughts and think clearly again. Only then would I be able to figure a way out of this horrible situation. There's always a way, my mother used to tell me. I strained to get my brain to fixate on that tiny ray of hope. Never again would I have thought my mother's words would calm me and bring me peace.

I struggled to keep my heavy eyelids open, knowing this was the result of whatever the nurses had injected into me before. I knew I had seconds, if not minutes before my eyes would close indefinitely. After that there was no way out, this would be the end. I needed to keep them open. As long as they remained open I would be safe. As soon as they closed the world I knew would slip away from me, more importantly, Alex would slip away from me.

"It hasn't kicked in yet, she's still conscious." One of the women leaned over me and quickly informed the other. "We are running out of time." Her words echoed in my skull and I forced myself to swallow. I moved my hand to my side pinching my skin between my thumb and index finger. Stay awake! my brain hissed at me.

"We can't know for sure how long it will take before she is unconscious and we can proceed. The medication works differently on everyone." The other nurse explained calmly.

"We don't have enough time!" the other one repeated at a louder volume.

"It's going to be okay Margaret. We have guards surrounding the perimeter; there is no one that can stop up from performing the procedure." I could feel my eyes beginning to close. "Margaret look, her heartbeat is slowing down; it shouldn't be much longer now."

Margaret sighed, "We shouldn't have to rush this. If everything had gone to plan-"

"Well it didn't." The other woman snapped. "That stupid boy, Alex, got in the way." I opened my eyes wider, suddenly alert at the sound of his name spoken. Both women ignored the beeping of the monitor as my heart beat sped up once again.

"Did they catch him?" Margaret asked softly, however still loud enough for me to hear. I knew she wanted me to hear.

The other woman paused, glancing quickly at me. "No, not yet." I relaxed then, there was still time. Still time for him to get away, I could find him afterwards. I knew I would be strong enough to fight this. Fight the cure. My mother had several times, so who says I couldn't as well? I could fool them long enough to find Alex and escape before any of them knew what hit them. I could escape.

"I think we should perform the cure now. There isn't much time. I would have rather waited until she was eighteen…" the woman trailed off.

"Okay let's do it now. The benefits outweigh the risks." Margaret picked up a syringe and injected something into my left arm.

Suddenly, I felt as if my body was on fire. I screamed a horrible, ear-piercing scream and thrashed my hands around. I couldn't do this. I couldn't live through this either. I struggled to take a breath, but forced myself to anyway. I had to live through this. And I would live through this. For Alex. I would do this for Alex. Because only after all of this, could both of us ever possibly be free.

Xxxx

My hand trembled as I lifted the rim of the teacup to my dry lips, sipping the liquid slowly, enough to satisfy my Aunt. She sat opposite me at the table, her hands clasped together and her lips pursed, watching me with cautious eyes. I carefully placed the teacup back of the saucer and folded my hands on my lap. My Aunt opened her mouth as if to speak but quickly shut it again, changing her mind. We watched eachother for what felt like hours, but were merely minutes.

Finally she spoke, "What is it you want to do today, Lena?" she ran her right hand through her messy hair, her eyes never shifting from my own.

I dropped my eyes and peered at my lap, twisting the hem of my skirt around my fingers. "What is it I normally do?" I ask softly.

My Aunt didn't speak, not even moving in her chair. "I could give Hana a call for you? Maybe you two could go for a bike ride?"

I nodded, "Alright."

My Aunt nodded in agreement and got up to fetch the phone off the coffee table in the living room. I listened as she punched in the numbers and pressed the phone against her ear. "Mrs Tate? Yes, hi, it's Carol." I turned in my chair slightly to listen better when she lowered her voice. "No, nothing. They say it's just a side effect the procedure had on her brain. They say her memory should come back within a month or so. No, not much. Although sometimes she looks at me like she almost does, but then that blank stare returns to her face."

I sighed; the words Carol spoke were true. I remembered nothing before waking up inside the hospital with Aunt Carol leaning over me. After that I remembered nothing, including people. It took a few days before I accepted that this woman was in fact my Aunt. Sometimes I was still not sure. This time Carol's voice was barely a whisper and I strained to hear. Carefully, I got off the chair and tiptoed over to the far wall, craning my neck to catch what my Aunt was trying to stop me from hearing.

"No they haven't found him. I wish they would. Everyday I'm terrified he'll be lurking somewhere to try and get her back." I pressed myself further against the wall, praying my Aunt would speak the tiniest bit louder. "Yes, of course. I know they will, I just hope they do before she remembers, so at least there is time to redo the cure if necessary. I don't want another repeat of her mother…"

My Aunt explained to me a few days ago that my mother had committed suicide many years ago. Told me she was sick from the disease they had managed to cure me of a week ago. Told me I was safe now, I wouldn't end up like her. My Aunt's words broke into my thoughts, "No, she doesn't remember him I don't think…" Remember who? Who was this person she kept mentioning? "Alright, yes, I'll drop her off soon. Good bye."

I hurried back to my seat, hoping my face didn't give away any sign that I had been eavesdropping on the conversation. My Aunt looked troubled as she resumed her place opposite me at the table. I could see she was clutching the phone in her hand so tight her knuckles had gone white. I also noticed the frown lines forming on her forehead. She took a deep breath before she spoke. "Lena?" I forced my eyes to meet hers. "Lena, do you remember anything before you were given the cure?" her eyes pleaded with mine for the truth.

I shook my head. I wasn't lying either. I wish I could remember; I wish I could understand what she and Mrs Tate were talking about. But everything felt like it was completely wiped from my memory and now everything was blank. Sometimes I could have sworn tiny details from my past emerged before me, when I wasn't trying. But they disappeared as quickly as they had come. Her lips were pressed tightly together, forming a thin straight line below her nose. The way she stared at me carefully revealed to me she didn't believe me for whatever reason. Was I a liar before the cure?

Finally, she nodded and rose from the table, quickly grabbing her purse from where it lay on the kitchen bench. She gave me a once over before running a rough hand through my hair and letting it slip through her fingers and fall back down my back. "Hurry now, we don't want to leave Hana and her mother waiting long do we?"

I shook my head and fixed the collar on my blouse before following my Aunt out the front door to begin the long walk to Hana's house. I can't remember how long the walk was, but my Aunt insisted I used to be quite fit so I relaxed, prepared for the worst. We walked in silence for the whole twenty minutes, my Aunt keeping us both at a brisk pace. Occasionally I caught her looking at me and her eyes quickly looked away guiltily and I wished she would tell me whatever was on her mind. When we finally arrived at the Tate's place, I was overwhelmed by the beauty of the huge place. As my Aunt climbed the stairs to the front door I could only stand there in wonder. I couldn't understand why our house didn't look like that.

My Aunt knocked on the huge wooden double doors while I climbed the stairs hesitantly. The way my Aunt Carol clutched her handbag I could tell she was nervous. She rushed to brush loose strands of hair out of her eyes and straighten the hem of her skirt, mumbling something inaudible to herself. She flitted her eyes to meet mine and then back to the spot on the floor. She looked like she was in a hurry to get this over with.

The door opened then and a woman with cropped blonde hair and light brown eyes stood before us. She only looked at my Aunt for a second but her eyes remained on mine. She stared at me from her place in the doorway and I watched as she looked me up and down, scrutinizing every tiny flaw. She finally smiled, obviously satisfied, but the way her lips curled at the side told me she was happy about something I couldn't understand. Something about my past I couldn't remember.

I looked up and noticed someone standing shyly behind her. She was hidden by her mother's body and all I could pick out from where I stood was a long blonde ponytail and a pair of very long legs. She pushed past her mother then, and stopped when she stood directly in front of me. She must have been half a foot taller than me with her sparkling blue eyes and big pink lips that turned up into a smile when she saw me. "L…Lena?"

I nodded, suddenly unsure of myself. Everyone knew who this Lena was and I still had no idea who I was and it made me uneasy. I had been told countless times that Hana Tate was my best friend. Now as I watched her flick her long shiny ponytail over one shoulder all in one swift, graceful movement; I couldn't understand how I was friends with someone like that. Not only was she beautiful, she had a home three times the size of mine. We were so different yet the way she watched me with excitement in her eyes it made me feel like we were just the same.

She hesitated, but then thought better of it and wrapped her long arms around my ting frame, squeezing my arms. She shook with laughter as she held me there; laughing at something I would never understand. But I laughed back because maybe it was possible to rebuild a life out of nothing. I could start anew. And what was wrong with that? Who could I possibly miss from my old life if I couldn't remember them?

Reviews would be very much appreciated- let me know what you think. I've really missed you all.

~Lel