Title: A Supervillain's Guide to Getting Married.
Pairing/Characters: Loki/Tony. Thor, Steve Rogers, Clint Barton, Nick Fury, Bruce Banner, Natasha Romanoff.
Summary: Written for this prompt on Avengerkink: "Even though there's the frequent battles with the Avengers, and his plans are always being thwarted, Loki likes it on Earth. He doesn't want to leave! But Odin (and Thor) rather want him back in Asgard. Loki decides it would be a good idea to marry a local, and have an excuse for staying put. Maybe he tries meeting some new people, but they don't interest him much. Better to stick with the people he knows (and would never admit to maybe kind of respecting a tiny bit). So Loki decides to marry an Avenger."
Tags: Accidental marriage, FrostIron, Wooing, Courting, Mild Hurt/Comfort.

A Supervillain's Guide to Getting Married.

Chapter 14/14

~0~

~0~

Tony dodged the laser beam that Ultimo aimed at them as he flew over the buildings and then headed out to sea across the bay.

"What's the plan?" Tony asked.

"Just get me within touching distance of it," Loki replied, his voice faint and whipped away by the wind.

"JARVIS, prepare to divert all available power to the thrusters."

"Preparing to divert all power from non essential systems. Power will be increased by 32%."

Tony wheeled round in the sky, placing himself behind the bomb and slightly below. "JARVIS, do it!"

The sudden increase in power shot him forward, carrying them level with the bomb, and he looked back to see Loki reaching out with one hand towards it.

"Closer!" Loki shouted.

Tony shifted his angle of flight, edging them closer to the bomb as he watched Loki's outstretched fingertips finally touch one of the white fins.

There was a flash of light that Tony was forced to close his eyes, and for a second he thought 'shit, that's it I'm dead… except if I'm dead how am I thinking this?' and he opened his eyes.

Space.

They were in space, and not just the outer edges of space where Tony had been before and seen the sky turn to stars, but with the comfort of the ground still visible far below. This was actual space, and as Tony watched Loki release the bomb he turned his head and saw Saturn.

Before Tony could even say 'what the FUCK?' there was another flash of light and when he opened his eyes again he was tumbling through the skies of Earth, and Loki was gone from his back.

"JARVIS, get all propulsion systems back online now, and find Loki," Tony shouted.

"Sir, I have found Loki, he is approximately 35ft directly above us and falling, but I am having difficulty with ice build up around vital systems."

"I thought we beat the icing problems?"

"Sir, if I may, the icing problem in the upper atmosphere is not as severe as deep space. I am working on restoring power now."

"Work faster," Tony said as he saw the ground looming closer. "Work much faster!"

There was a whine as the boot thrusters spluttered, attempting to start, and then finally kicked into life, propelling Tony upwards sluggishly as they struggled to reach full power, and towards Loki who was falling without moving, his cape fluttering in the wind.

Tony grabbed him as they fell past the first floor of a multi-storey parking garage, and then remembered just how heavy the god was. Tony fought against the extra weight, managing to slow their fall considerably, but they still weren't flying.

Tony felt a sickening crunch as they smashed into the roof of a car, crushing it completely, and then rolled over the bonnet and landed on the floor in a heap of limbs.

Tony sat up quickly and raised his faceplate, turning to see Loki lying on his back on the floor, still unconscious.

He got up on his knees and leaned over him, pulling one glove off and tapping him gently on the face, avoiding the ugly cut on his cheekbone that was dripping blood. "Loki. Loki, wake up."

Tony sat back down and dragged Loki onto his knees, cradling him in his arms as best he could, and said, "Don't you dare do this to me! You need to wake up now!"

Loki's lashes fluttered, he opened his eyes, and Tony breathed a sigh of relief. "I thought you were dead."

"Why Tony Stark, I think you might be my hero," Loki replied with a grin.

"You gave me such a fucking a scare there," Tony said.

"You think even a god can run around in space without oxygen?" Loki asked as he climbed to his feet.

"You ever do anything like that again and I'll kill you myself."

Loki let out a snorting laugh, and was about to speak when they heard an explosion in the distance as Ultimo still strode down the avenue, firing his lasers at anything that moved.

"Perhaps we should return to the battle," Loki said as he watched a building collapse in the distance.

"How the hell are we gonna stop this thing if we can't just blow it up?" Tony asked.

"What is Eyjafjallajökull?" Loki asked, and Tony looked at him quizzically. "It is something I heard when I was fighting with Doom to break the spell. He thought of it quite distinctly."

"Any ideas, JARVIS?" Tony asked.

"Eyjafjallajökull is a volcano that erupted in Iceland in 2010, sir," the AI replied.

"Oh yeah, I remember that," Tony said, and then he suddenly said. "Wait, the heat, the power could be geothermal. Do you think there is any chance Doom may have found this robot in the volcano?"

"It is entirely possible," Loki replied as he stared off into the distance. Suddenly he turned round, his cape flaring out, and he said, "I have an idea to defeat the machine."

"What do we need to do?" Tony asked.

~0~

"Stark, where the hell are you?" Fury shouted over the comm. "We need you down here right now. This situation is out of control."

"Nick, we've got an idea to beat this thing. I'm working on it right now," Tony replied.

"What idea?"

"I'm not exactly sure, I'll have to get back to you on that one."

"So what exactly are you doing while we are down here getting our asses kicked?"

"I'm kinda flying round over the city with a Norse god on my back, feeling faintly ridiculous," Tony replied.

"You're what?" Fury exclaimed.

Loki suddenly pointed and shouted, "North. I need to head north towards the park."

"Stark. Manhattan was only in the early stages of evacuation. Everyone has been ordered indoors, but If this thing doesn't go down soon god knows how many lives will be lost."

"We're doing our best, boss. I'll get back to you soon."

"There! We need to land there!" Loki shouted as they reached the north end of Central Park.

Tony landed neatly, raised his faceplate and asked, "What is it?"

Loki hopped off his back, knelt and ran his hands over the grass. "It's a fault line. I can feel it."

"Why were we looking for a fault line?"

"I'm going to open it."

"What?" Tony gasped. "You can't do that. You'll create a goddamn volcano in Central Park."

Loki looked up and tilted his head. "And how else are we going to defeat this foe if it is not by sending him back whence he came? Do you have a plan?"

"You couldn't teleport it into space or something?" Tony asked.

"Something that large?" Loki asked, raising an eyebrow. "You clearly overestimate my power. Do you have any other bright ideas?"

"No," Tony admitted.

"Then run along," Loki said, waving a hand dismissively. "Go find the others and attract the machine to this location and I will be waiting for you."

Tony closed his faceplate and blasted into the sky, wondering how the hell he was going to explain this one. A volcano in Manhattan probably wasn't Fury's idea of a plan, but was there any other way? They couldn't blow the damn thing up, and this volcano thing might just work, or at least would hold the giant metal death robot until they found some other way of disposing of him.

"Guys," Tony said over the comm. "I'm coming to you. We've got an idea."

"It's about damn time," Clint replied.

"What's the plan?" Fury asked.

"Errr… It's probably better if I explain it when we get there," Tony said as he landed down in the street where Thor and Steve were taking shelter behind an overturned car.

"Plan?" Steve asked, as the ground shook beneath their feet with every step the giant robot took.

"We need to lead it towards the park. Loki is there, waiting for us," Tony replied.

"Loki will destroy the beast?" Thor asked.

"Hmm… More neutralise than destroy," Tony replied.

"OK, so this thing is reacting to movement," Steve said, holding his hand to his ear so everyone could hear his commands. "Clint, I need you to come pick me and Natasha up. We can't move fast enough down here on the ground and would just slow this thing down. Set down in the parking lot behind the diner down the street. That should give you some cover."

"No problem," Clint answered.

"I'll meet you there," Natasha confirmed.

"Thor, I want you and Tony to get airborne. Just make a nuisance of yourself, do anything to attract its attention and then head north towards the park."

"Aye. I shall meet you in the park," Thor said as he began to spin Mjolnir, and then took off into the air.

"What about him?" Tony asked, as he looked up and watched Hulk clinging to the shoulder of the robot repeatedly punching it in the neck.

"I think we'll just let him get on with it," Steve replied with a shrug, and then he turned to Tony and asked, "Loki isn't going to let us down is he?"

"Oh ye of little faith," Tony said, and then he blasted off into the air. "JARVIS, patch me through to Loki, and only him."

"Opening a private channel now, sir."

"How's it going, babe?" Tony asked as he carved a path through the sky, wheeling round in arc until he was in the path of the robot.

"Stark," Loki ground out, sounding as if he was straining against something. "What have I told you about calling me names?"

"Sorry, how's it going my king, my lord and master?"

"Not as well as I had hoped, but when you arrive at my location can you please instruct Thor to join me?"

"Will do. We should be with you soon," Tony said, as he darted in front of Ultimo, twisting as he moved through the air to unleash a missile barrage.

"I look forward to it," Loki replied.

They alternated, the Quinjet, Thor, Iron Man and the Hulk, each taking a turn to dart in front of the enormous machine and attract it onwards, leading it down the wide road north.

With Steve calling out directions from the quinjet they finally lead Ultimo onto 5th Avenue, which allowed them to use the tall buildings for cover and gave them a straight shot down towards the park.

Tony could finally see trees and grass in the distance and asked, "Loki, are you ready?"

"Not quite," Loki replied. "I am rather ashamed to admit that I still need Thor's help."

"OK, as soon as we hit the edge of the park I'll get him to you," Tony replied.

Thor ducked out, shooting upwards to avoid a laser beam, as Hulk jumped in, leaping across the street from building to building, but as he took one final leap before rounding the corner Ultimo raised his hand to his head again and unleashed a bolt of red.

The beam caught Hulk in the side, carrying him through the side of a building and out of sight.

"Hulk is down!" Steve's voice came over the radio. "Tony can you handle this with Thor until we check on him?"

Ultimo emerged from the buildings, following Iron Man, and smashed through the wall into Central park, tearing up the trees in his path with his hands. They were on open ground now, and with nothing to hide behind they were fish in a barrel.

"That's a negative Cap. Sorry to leave the party, but Loki needs us up ahead," Tony said as he wheeled through the sky.

"Us?" he vaguely heard Steve ask as he swooped low across the ground and grabbed Thor by the hand and carried him into the air.

"Tony, what are you doing?" Natasha shrieked over the comm.

Tony looked down and saw Thor staring up at him quizzically as he carried him over the treetops. "Sorry buddy, but your little brother has demanded your company."

As they cleared the tree line he saw Loki, stood on a mound of earth in front of an enormous crater.

"Loki, what are you doing?" Thor asked when Tony neatly set him by Loki's side.

"Creating a volcano to trap the machine," he answered, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

"An excellent plan!" Thor exclaimed, as if it was the most natural thing in the world and Tony made a mental note to ask Thor to tell him stories of the shenanigans those two got up too back in the old days and have JARVIS take notes so he could sell it to a Hollywood producer. "You require my assistance?"

"As much as it pains me to say it, I do, yes," Loki replied. "I need you to let me channel Mjolnir's power and entwine her magic with my own."

"Brother, you know that is dangerous," Thor said lowly.

"Dangerous?" Tony asked.

"She has not forgiven him for the time he suggested I dress a bride to get her back after she was stolen. She said it was demeaning," Thor replied.

"It was a long time ago. She should be over it by now," Loki said dismissively. "Come, stand behind me."

Thor moved behind Loki, placing one hand round his waist and then holding out Mjolnir with his left hand.

Loki moved his hand towards the shaft of the hammer and then yelped in pain as a tiny electric spark arced to his already burnt fingers.

"Wretched thing!" Loki snarled. "If it were not for me you would still be in the hands of Thrym!"

"Loki, you should not goad her. You know she does not like it."

"Er, guys," Tony said, as he looked across the park. "Can we hurry this up? Giant killer robot heading this way!"

Loki closed his hand over Thor's, their fingers entwining, and Tony took a step back as this sort of glow appeared around them. He watched as Loki raised his hand, and where his magic was usually invisible or accompanied by flashes of light or colour, this time he could see the waves of energy radiating from his palm like heat haze in the desert.

If he had ever doubted that Loki and Thor really were gods in the past, seeing them like this erased it completely.

The ground in front of them started to shake, the soil itself moving as if bubbling from deep within the Earth's crust. It started to shift upwards, the pile growing as it began to steam.

The strain on their faces was evident as Loki bared his teeth in a grimace and a trickle of sweat ran down his forehead.

There was a sound, like a sonic boom, but it came from below the ground, and suddenly the earth was rent apart, a deep chasm appearing and lava rushed upwards, spilling over the edges.

"Get back!" Tony shrieked as Lava splashed into the air and then began to ooze down the sides of the mound Loki had created.

"What the HELL is that?" Fury's voice came over the comm, as the Quinjet flew over the trees, drawing the robot after it.

Thor moved backwards, dragging Loki with him, out of the path of a lava stream.

"It's a trap," Tony replied.

"What, and you just expect him to walk into it?" Fury asked.

"I believe I can help with that," Loki said, raising his hand, and a shimmering light settled over the lava pool, casting an illusion of solid ground over the hole.

"Nick, this is going to work, we just have to get him into it," Tony said.

"You better be right about this, Stark."

"I have never been more confident," Tony lied, as he took off into the air and headed towards Ultimo.

The giant robot was still making its way across the park, knocking down tall trees with its shuffling feet.

"Tag out," Tony said, as he barrel rolled into the sight of the robot, relieving the Quinjet of duty.

Iron Man weaved through the sky, narrowly avoiding the laser beams that seared the air as Ultimo desperately tried to fulfil his last order.

Tony looked down, checking his path was straight, and then found himself tumbling through the air, unable to stop himself as he ploughed into the ground.

"JARVIS, what the hell just happened?" Tony coughed.

"The left boot jet pack was unfortunately clipped by the laser and is offline, sir."

"Can you reroute power?"

"No, sir. The entire casing is melted and will need to be replaced."

Ultimo stopped advancing, stood at the edge of the concealed lava pit, and turned his head towards the Quinjet which was skimming across the other side of the park, attempting to stay concealed.

"I'm down!" Tony shouted. "Someone needs to get up here before he turns!"

There was a roar as Hulk appeared, crashing through the trees, and Ultimo turned his head towards him.

The robot raised a foot, and Tony held his breath as he extended his leg, took a step and his foot passed through the illusion of solid ground. He teetered tantalisingly, as he might be able to save himself, and then finally tipped forward into the pit of lava.

"Shit, yeah!" Tony shouted.

"Will that hold him?" Fury asked.

"It's a volcano, Nick, I thin-" Tony was interrupted by a roar from the lava pit as steam began to rise and a glowing, superheated metal hand appeared above the rim and then sank back down and the robot tried to claw its way out. "Loki! You need to close that thing!"

Loki was on his feet as Tony scrambled his way back from the edge of the pit as the arm rose and fell again, and suddenly the sky started to turn grey overhead and small splotches started to appear on Tony's visor.

He held out his hand, catching snowflakes that floated from the sky.

Loki was at the edge of the pit, holding the blue box that he shown Tony, and it was pouring wave after wave of ice and snow onto the burning hot lava, and turning it to stone, trapping the robot beneath it.

Loki stood for a moment, holding the box in his blue hands as his shoulders slowly hunched forward.

"Loki," Thor said quietly. "Turn around."

"No."

"Turn around, brother."

Loki suddenly turned, and hissed, "How can you call me that when I look like this?"

Thor smiled gently and held Mjolnir out. "Perhaps we should fill this tear in the ground. It would be dangerous to leave it where children play."

Loki looked from Thor to the hammer and back again, a flow of confusing emotions crossing his face, and then finally he moved his hands, sending the blue box back to wherever it had come from.

He leaned over and entwined his blue fingers with Thor's.

~0~

The brothers were laid on the ground laughing, Loki's head laid on Thor's stomach, when the Quinjet landed and Fury walked out, eyeing the 15ft mound of still steaming dirt and rock that covered the lava pit.

"Why is that still here?" Fury snapped.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Are my skills of matter manipulation not good enough for you?" Loki asked. "Perhaps you would like to finish the job yourself."

Thor laughed loudly, and Loki frowned. "You make a useless pillow, Thor. Especially when you laugh like that."

"Then perhaps you should lay yourself somewhere softer?"

"I should lay my head on your head. That is soft enough."

Thor laughed again and said, "This reminds me of that time on Alfheim."

"The Tavern woman with the unfeasibly large chest," Loki agreed.

"No," Thor said. "I was thinking of the time when you were trapped in the form of a goose and that farmer wanted to use your feathers to stuff his pillow."

"Oh yes!" Loki agreed. "I had forgotten about that."

"When you are quite finished with the reminiscing…" Fury said. "What are we supposed to do with this?"

"I dunno, Nick," Tony said. "Maybe turf it and put a nice flagpole or a statue on top to celebrate our victory."

Loki and Thor finally climbed to their feet as a shirtless Bruce wandered out through the undergrowth.

"How are you doing?" Steve asked. "You took a pretty good hit from that thing."

"I'm fine," Bruce said, and then he looked at Loki. "Which is more than I can say for you. What the hell happened to your hand?"

"It is nothing. It will heal by the morning," Loki replied.

"You are not putting that thing on me while it looks like that," Tony said.

"Oh, so I suppose you don't want sex tonight to celebrate our victory?" Loki asked.

"I never said that," Tony replied, as he pulled Loki towards him. "You can wear a glove."

Loki leaned forward, meeting Tony's mouth with his own, and then pulled away when he heard a very audible "Ewwww," from behind them.

"Agent Barton, I believe a promise was made that in return for my help you would all respect our relationship," Loki said, fixing Clint with a glare.

Clint rolled his eyes, but Natasha said, "Sorry Clint, but he's right, and I kinda agreed on your behalf. It was the only way to get him to help."

Tony wrapped one arm round Loki's waist, and said, "So Pa, can I keep him?"

Fury gritted his teeth and raised his finger. "If you so much as put one foot, one TOE out of line you will go back to being our enemy."

"I'll look forward to it," Loki replied with a grin.

~0~

~0~

Tony spent days down in the wreck of the Helicarrier, helping to rescue people who were trapped in sections sealed by watertight bulkheads, saved by the still functioning life support systems, and then more days bringing up the bodies of those who had not survived.

Even Loki had deigned to assist when Tony had begged him to teleport deep into the bowels of the ship to bring out those who were sealed behind multiple doors.

A week later and the funerals started, with one Avenger attending each of them.

It was a sad time around the tower, but Loki was always there to cheer Tony up with sly smile and a warm bed when he arrived back.

~0~

The mayor appeared on television one night announcing that the small extinct volcano in Central Park was to be named Mount Mjolnir in honour of the Avengers and their victory over Ultimo, which sent Loki into a frenzy of ranting and somehow the sofa ended up on fire in the street below.

He vanished shortly after, then reappeared an hour later with a self satisfied grin on his face, and a few minutes later a rather harassed looking mayor appeared on the TV again and claimed a mistake had been made and the volcano would be known as Loki Mountain.

"I take you had a hand in this?" Tony asked.

Loki shrugged, and said, "Mortals are fickle creatures. It is hardly my fault that your moods are as changeable as the weather."

~0~

It is all over the papers and news that Loki helped the Avengers to defeat Ultimo and suddenly the public loved him.

He was on the covers of magazines and T shirt sellers on street corners were selling clothing bearing his image. He received invitations to appear on TV chat shows and newspapers were clamouring to be the first to get the full story about how a supervillain had turned superhero.

Then one day a magazine printed a story that Loki had joined the Avengers and three hours after it hit the stands all the paintings in the metropolitan art museum came to life and several people were injured when a Van Gogh self portrait got a bit slash happy and cut a few ears off while Loki looked on and laughed.

Suddenly he was public enemy number one again.

Tony didn't mind though 'cause he knew that one day everyone would see Loki just like he did... sitting on the sofa with his legs open, wearing nothing but a robe which had fallen open, while he dipped cold hot dogs into a jar of Marshmallow Fluff and laughed his ass off at the History channel.

Yeah, maybe it was best that they didn't.

~0~

~0~

A week later Loki announced that he had urgent business to attend to and returned later that evening with a golden apple and a black eye.

"Idunn may be an old crone, but she still packs a punch," Loki explained as he handed Tony the apple.

"Is this what I think it is?" Tony asked, turning over the fruit in his hand.

"It is," Loki replied, and then he placed his hand over Tony's. "You should consider this carefully before you eat it. It will significantly lengthen your life and it will have other effects too."

"I'm not gonna get the sudden urge to wear helmets am I?"

Loki let out a soft laugh and then leaned forward and brushed his fingers across Tony's arc reactor. "You won't need this any more. The apples heal all wounds, past and present. The shrapnel will be ejected from your body."

"Wow, that's quite something."

"You will still be left with the scars, but it is still not a decision to be taken lightly. This is part of who you are."

"Lets look at it rationally, maybe I eat the apple. What will change really? I don't need it to power the suit."

"We would have to buy a bedside lamp so I can read at night," Loki added.

Tony laughed and said, "To quote my favourite Norse god, what have I to fear?"

"You have nothing to fear. As long as I am here none shall harm you, and I have no plans to leave," Loki replied.

Tony brought the apple to his mouth and took a bite.

~0~

And that is that! The "little 5000 word prompt fill that would not end" has finally complete.

Thanks to everyone who has stuck with me and thank you so much for all your lovely reviews! It has been very much appreciated :-D

Hopefully my next fic shouldn't take me so long to write, but I said that about this one too :-p