A Very Golden Vacation

(multi-chapter small sequel to The Gold Standard)

Snapegirlkmf

I do not own OUAT or its characters, unfortunately

1

On the Road

Storybrooke, Maine

Present day

Two months after GS ended:

It had been decided that after Regina had begun settling in with the Charmings and everyone else in the family, that they all needed a vacation, to get in some bonding time together and so forth. Baelfire had managed to convince Rumple that they needed to visit Manhattan, because it would provide some culture and fun experiences for everyone, and Bae said he'd promised to go somewhere with Alina and Henry after the curse broke and he'd also promised Henry to go and eat New York pizza. "So a family vacation to Manhattan fits the bill, Papa," he told his father one afternoon a week before the end of June. "What do you say?"

Gold just stared at his son. "I say you are certifiable for a nuthouse, Baelfire. You want your family, my family, and the Charmings with Regina to go to Manhattan on vacation?"

"Yeah. Come on, it'll be fun! Aren't you sick of staying in Storybrooke all the time? Now that the curse is broken, you can go wherever you want here."

"And what if I just want to stay here?" Gold asked testily.

"What are you, agoraphobic or something? It's not like Manhattan's the end of the earth," Bae persuaded.

Gold scowled. "Even though I can travel outside Storybrooke, Bae, I don't feel comfortable doing so. Magic is unpredictable in this world and Storybrooke has lots of ley lines and the arcane web here is stronger than it would be in other places . . . like a city, where millions of people using technology and steel and iron block the flow of magical energy."

"What? You're telling me you're afraid to travel because you might not be able to use your magic? Can't you just . . . make something to store some in and take it with you? Like a . . . uh . . . battery pack? Sort of like portable WiFi?"

"I'm not a computer, Baelfire. I'm a magician."

"Yeah, and you're a really clever archmage," his son pointed out. "I'm sure you can figure out something. If you really wanted to."

Gold sighed. "Is this really so important to you?"

Bae nodded. "I think it would be a really great experience for all of us. And I did promise Henry and Alina."

Gold threw up his hands. "Fine! But if something goes wrong on this bloody vacation, I'm free to tell you I told you so."

"Then you'll do it?"

"Didn't I just say I would?"

"We've got a deal then?"

"Yes." He held out a hand.

Bae took it. "Okay. Now let me tell the rest of the family. Then we can figure out the best time to go and book a flight."

"Heaven help us. Manhattan might never be the same. And I might end up in an institution," Gold predicted. But the deal had been struck and he would never break another one with his son.

Page~*~*~*~*~Break

Finally all the arrangements were made and a first class round trip ticket was booked for the entire family for June 30th, 2013 from Logan International Airport to JFK International Airport. Rumple had also made arrangements to stay at the Plaza Hotel for a week and a half, and they would leave on a Thursday morning to go back to Maine. With Bae and Emma's help, he had gotten packages of tickets to the Museum of Natural History, the Bronx Zoo, the Empire State building, the Statue of Liberty, Broadway's Beauty and the Beast, and Jekyll and Hyde, a kid friendly restaurant. Bae had an entire itinerary planned out, from a day spent in Chinatown and Little Italy, to a carriage ride in Central Park for Rumple and Belle, and some nights at exclusive New York restaurants for the adults, which they could take turns going to.

While all of that was going on, Rumple had been working on making something he could store some magic in, in case he had trouble accessing the arcane web in the city. He wasn't worried about Emma or the two children, his apprentices had come into their powers in this world, and so had no trouble accessing this world's magical web and lines of energy. But he came from a world where the arcane web was much stronger, and he was used to interacting with it on a far different level and frequency. So it made for difficulties when he tried to use magic outside of Storybrooke, which had an awakened magical web and stronger lines of power than other parts of the country.

It was Alina who had come up with the idea of a pair of cufflinks, since Belle had given him a set of diamond ones to celebrate the breaking of the curse over Storybrooke and his new status as Storybrooke's resident sorcerer and member of the new town council. She was also a member, and Charming had been elected the new mayor in Regina's place.

Most of Storybrooke's citizens were ambivalent about the fact that Regina was now a child, without any memory of her former life, and being raised by David and Mary Margaret, as they were sometimes still known, as their daughter. They seemed relieved to never have to worry about the Evil Queen again, though there were a few problems with some of them who wanted to go back to the Enchanted Forest, but the only way they had of getting back there was Jefferson's hat or trying to grow magical beans. Currently, Jeff had gone back to Fairy Tale Land to find Jack Sparrow and Vasilisa, to see if they could help find a cache of beans or a way to grow more so they could give those who wished to a way to go back to their former home.

So Rumple enchanted the diamond cufflinks to store quite a bit of his power, making them able to be used to give him a magical energy boost whenever he tapped them together, though there was a limit to how many times he could use them before draining them dry. So he would be careful to only use them as necessary.

Belle had taken over the job of packing everything for herself, her husband, and Alina. She had also made arrangements with Archie for him to cat-sit Nala while they were gone, bringing the little cat over to his house on the morning that they were due to leave for the airport. Rumple had taught her how to drive finally, and gotten her a cute sky blue mini Cooper, though they would use the Cadillac to go to the airport.

Page~*~*~*~Break

Charmings loft:

"Snow, did you pack my razor?" Charming called, as he went through their carryon bags.

"Yes, it's in the luggage, Bae said you can't fly with it in your carryon because of the new FDA regulations since 9/11," his wife called, as she finished packing her toddler's carryon bag, which contained an extra outfit, shoes, some snacks Regina enjoyed, her Leapster Explorer 2 with extra game cartridges, a coloring book, crayons, and some Disney books, a small container of antibacterial soap, tissues and some gum to chew in case her ears hurt when the plane took off. Regina had a purple carryon with her name and address on the tag and the words Daddy's Little Princess in gold letters on the zippered duffle itself.

"Okay, are we all set?" her husband asked.

"Yes, I think so," Snow said. "I just have to call Rumple and let him know we'll be at his house in about ten minutes. Did you call Marco and remind him that he's in charge along with the rest of the town council until we come home?"

"Did that already, hon," David reassured her.

"Daddy, can I bring Sofia with me?" asked his small daughter, coming up and showing him her ragdoll, which was about seventeen inches tall, with brown string hair and a sewn on face. Sofia was wearing a frilly purple dress and black shoes with laces. Sofia had been a gift to her from her Uncle Rumple, it had been made for her by him, as had the five outfits that came with her, which were made with snaps so Regina could dress and undress the doll herself.

"Yeah, princess," Charming said, smiling at Regina. "And maybe you can show Auntie Belle and Uncle Rumple how you can tie Sofia's shoes now." He had been practicing that with her for two weeks, and the toddler had actually mastered that skill two days ago.

Regina nodded eagerly. She was wearing pink jeans, a white top with pink bows around the collar, light-up purple Reeboks, and a Disney Princess jacket. Snow had combed her dark hair and pulled it back in a ponytail with a sparkly pink ribbon. The three-year-old former Evil Queen had an adorable smirk on her face when she said, "An' I'm gonna drive with Unca Rumple to the airport, right?"

"Yup, since Mommy's car is in the shop getting fixed and you can't fit with us in my truck because there's not enough room for your car seat," David explained to her.

The little girl skipped over to Snow, making her sneakers glow with purple light, and asked, "Mommy, what're you doing?"

"I'm packing your bag for the trip," Snow replied.

Regina knelt to examine the little duffle and pointed to the gold lettering and asked, "What's that say?"

"It says you're Daddy's princess," Snow answered, smiling at her daughter.

Regina giggled and clapped her hands. "Daddy always calls me that."

Snow grinned and asked slyly, "And what does Emma call you?"

"Emma calls me chatterbox."

"And how about Uncle Rumple?"

"Uh . . . Unca Rumple calls me Miss Big Mouth Bossypants," the toddler declared. "Cause I try and tell everybody what to do."

That was certainly true, Snow reflected. Regina, despite the fact that she couldn't recall anything of her former life, still had an outgoing and very opinionated personality. She could be very sweet at times, but she also had a stubborn streak a mile wide and when she got in a mood, could get very loud and insist upon having her own way. Snow and Charming were working with her to correct that fault, though so far they hadn't made a huge impression on her.

Oddly enough, Regina seemed to have less tantrums with Rumple and Belle than she did for anyone save Henry. Charming said it was because Gold knew when to put his foot down and had experience with toddlers. Snow thought it was because even though Regina had no memory of her former life, she still bore a visceral memory of her time as Rumple's apprentice and so she obeyed him . . . mostly. Not that she didn't obey her parents . . . but she also tested her boundaries with them, and Snow had bought many books on parenting a strong-willed child to help her and Charming deal with their daughter. Some of the tactics worked and others didn't. It was a learning process for all of them.

Snow helped David carry all their bags out to his truck and then they all got in to drive the short distance to Gold's Victorian. Regina sat up front with Charming while Snow crouched in the back with the suitcases, a temporary arrangement just till they got to Gold's house. She called Rumple as they were en route to his place and he said they were all packed and waiting for their arrival. Alina was riding with Henry, Bae, and Emma in the Bug, so it would just be himself, Belle, and Regina.

The Charmings pulled up just as Gold was starting up his Cadillac and programming his GPS to get them to the airport. Belle was waiting to greet them as they emerged from the truck, with David carrying Regina and Snow bringing Regina's seat and her bag from the back.

"Hi, sweetie!" Belle said, taking Regina from Charming. "Are you all ready to go on a road trip with me and Uncle Rumple?"

"Yup. An' Mommy says we're goin' on a big plane way up high in the sky," the intrepid toddler said, pointing to the clouds up above.

"That's right," Belle said. She set Regina down and then asked Snow, "Do you need help with anything, Snow?"

"No, I've got this," Snow assured her, just as Charming came and removed the car seat from her grasp and carried it over to the car. "Here's her bag, it has a sippy cup with some juice in it in case she gets thirsty and some Goldfish and her Leapster and—"

"Tranquilizers?" asked Gold, deadpan, as he opened the driver's side of the car and came out. He was dressed in one of his less flashy Armani suits, a subdued silver gray jacket and muted silver and blue tie and his most comfortable pair of black Gucci loafers. His diamond stud cufflinks twinkled upon the cuffs of his navy blue shirt. He had his overcoat thrown in the back of the Cadillac.

"Rumple!" Belle scolded, giving him a reproving poke. She was wearing a soft pink cotton dress with a light brown jacket and her Louis Vuitton half-boots.

Snow raised an eyebrow at him, and rolled her eyes. "Funny, Rumple." She handed Belle the bag.

Regina grinned and raced over to grab Rumple about the knees. "Unca Rumple!"

The pawnbroker knelt cautiously and gave the little imp a hug, saying, "Hey, dearie. You ready to go on a little trip with me?"

Regina shook her head eagerly, making her dark hair bounce up and down. "Yup! Me and Sofia were up all night talkin' 'bout it."

"And so were we," Charming rolled his eyes. "I really have to partition the loft so that she has her own room."

"But Charming, I like sleeping with her," Snow protested.

"Uh, I do too, except . . . when I want some privacy," her husband coughed, shooting her a meaningful Look.

"We can worry about that later," Snow said, flushing just a little. "C'mon, Regina, let's get you in the car." She took her toddler's hand and they walked towards the Cadillac.

"Now you be good for Uncle Rumple and Auntie Belle, okay?" Charming said.

"Kay, Daddy," the little minx assured him, skipping beside Snow.

Charming turned to Gold and Belle. "Rumple, you already know you have my permission to discipline her if she gets out of line." Actually that rule went for any of the adults in the family, since both he and Snow had decided that consistency was a key when raising a toddler, and they didn't want Regina thinking she could get away with acting up with other family members when she was with them and not her parents.

"It'll be fine, David. I've raised two children before this, so I think I can handle her," Rumple reassured him. "I'll meet you at the airport. You know where to go, right?"

"Yeah. Emma programmed my GPS yesterday," David said. "Careful driving and I'll see you there." He waved as he climbed back in his truck.

After Snow had given Regina a kiss goodbye and put her in her car seat, she hopped into the truck and they took off.

Belle waited patiently in the front seat for Rumple to get in the car and put his cane in the back before shutting the door. "Ready, sweetheart?" she asked her husband as they pulled out of the driveway.

"As I'll ever be," he sighed, and took a left onto Storybrooke's Main Street, leading out of town.

Just then the GPS began speaking, giving directions, and Regina frowned from her seat inbetween Rumple and Belle, and said, "Unca Rumple, there's a man talking to you. Where is he?" she half-pushed herself out of her seat, looking around.

"That's just a computer, dearie," Rumple explained. "Now sit back, Regina."

The toddler did so, hugging her doll, and then said to Belle, "Auntie Belle, want to sing a song?"

Belle smiled at her and said, "What shall we sing?"

Page~*~*~*~*~Break

After listening to The Wheels on the Bus, Row Row Your Boat, and I Love You (the theme song from Barney), for the fifteenth time in a row in twenty minutes, Gold wished he brought earplugs. Not that Belle didn't have a lovely singing voice, and even Regina could carry a tune, but singing the same songs over and over was driving him nuts, even more so than the traffic he'd run into on the highway.

Why did I ever agree to this? he wondered as he drove, trying to tune out Regina, who was singing lustily. Suddenly, a black SUV darted into the lane in front of him without warning, causing him to slam on his brakes to avoid hitting it.

"Ah, come on, you stupid—!" Rumple began, aggravated.

"Rumple!" Belle warned. "There's a baby here."

"—idiot," he finished, which wasn't what he'd been going to say at all.

Then Regina spoke up, peering at the SUV in front of them with wide eyes. "Unca Rumple, that's not what you say. You honk the horn and say, learn to drive, you asshole!"

Belle gasped. "Regina Nolan, where did you hear that?"

"Daddy said it when we were driving to the supermarket," the toddler said innocently. "But he said I couldn't tell Mommy."

Rumple had to bite his lip hard to keep from bursting out laughing. Then he said, recalling himself, "That's not something you should be saying, young lady."

"Why? Because Daddy'll get in trouble with Mommy?"

"Yes, and because you will if you keep repeating it," Belle said. "That's not a nice thing to say, so you mind your mouth, miss, unless you want to taste soap."

Regina shook her head. "Nuh-uh, Auntie Belle. I'll 'member."

Rumple shot a side-long glance at his wife. "Maybe I ought to remind David that little pitchers have big ears . . . and bigger mouths."

"Pitchers don't have ears, Unca Rumple," Regina remarked. "They gots handles."

"Never mind, honey. Your uncle was . . . umm . . . being metaphorical," Belle said, her lips quivering.

"What's that?"

"Umm . . . never mind. Why don't I read you a book?" Belle suggested, getting out Lady and the Tramp from Regina's carryon.

By the time the story was done, Belle was dozing in the front seat.

Rumple prayed that Regina would drop off too, but the little girl seemed possessed of an unnatural amount of energy, more than he could recall Alina having at that age.

"Are we there yet, Unca Rumple?"

"Not yet," he groaned at that dreaded question.

"When will we be? I'm bored."

"Why don't you take a nap then, like Auntie Belle?"

She shook her head. "Not tired."

"Look out the window then," he said, changing lanes to get off at the proper exit.

As he did so, he saw Emma's yellow Bug ahead of them, and Bae beeped the horn as they went by.

A tiny fist suddenly jabbed him right in the shoulder, starting him so much he nearly swerved into the guard rail.

"Yellow punch buggy, no punchbacks!" Regina squealed.

"Regina!" Gold snapped. "I'm driving, dammit it all!"

"Oooh, you said a bad word!" the toddler reminded, shaking her finger at him. "I'm telling!"

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that," Rumple sighed. Now she's telling on me? Who's she going to tell? He wondered, rolling his eyes. "But you can't do that while I'm driving, little imp. It's a distraction. I could hit something."

"Like a car or a tree?"

"Yes, now keep your hands to yourself."

"How come? Do you need glasses?"

"No, of course not!" Rumple said exasperatedly. "I can see perfectly well. Who taught you that anyway?"

"Henry did," Regina answered.

"Figures," the sorcerer muttered, thinking he was going to have a long talk with his grandson about teaching his toddler aunt appropriate things to do while riding in a car. He reminded himself they only had fifteen more minutes until they reached Logan International . . . or at least that's what the GPS said.

Surely he could survive that much longer with a hyperactive toddler.

Fifteen minutes later they were stuck in traffic because some idiot had decided to do some construction work just before the road he needed to get on to the airport. They were crawling along and Rumple wanted to scream.

A bored Regina was whining in her seat, so he gave her some Goldfish, hoping to distract her. "Here, eat these and hush. It'll only be a few minutes."

"Why's it taking so long, Unca Rumple? Are we lost?"

"No, we're not lost," her uncle replied, thinking maybe it was a good idea if he took the hint and vanished. "Just be patient, okay?"

Regina, however, didn't do patient for very long. Her limit was about five minutes. Next thing he knew, she was waving Goldfish in his face and saying, "Want some, Unca Rumple? Want some?"

"No!" he snapped. "I mean, no thank you," he amended, realizing he was letting his temper get the better of him.

"You sure are grouchy," the little girl remarked candidly. "Is it 'cause your leg hurts?"

"No. It's because I'm frustrated," he muttered. And I have a nosy toddler to deal with on top of everything. "Now just . . . talk to yourself or something, okay?"

Two minutes went by, then Regina began making buzzing noises and waving her hands in front of Gold's face. "Bzzz! Bzzz! Bzzz! I'm a honey bee, Unca Rumple!" she crowed. "Bzzz! Bzzz!"

"Regina! Quit waving your hands in front of my face," he ordered angrily. "Godsake, I'm driving!"

"But I'm playing," she said, sounding rather cranky.

"I don't care. Now stop pestering me. Why don't you play with Auntie Belle?"

"She's asleep." She began to kick her heels against her car seat. "Unca Rumple, when we gonna get on the plane? I wanna fly."

Rumple ignored her, counting to ten in his head. Right then he wished Regina could fly too—right into orbit so he could get some peace.

"Unca Rumple, I want French fries," Regina whined next.

"Well, you can't have them right now. We're stuck on the road. You'll have to wait."

She pouted, her lower lip sticking out. Clearly she didn't like that answer, because she said, "Waiting sucks! I want some now."

Rumple ground his back teeth together. "That's too bad. Now mind that attitude, young miss, before I count to three."

Regina glared at him. "You're mean!" She kicked her feet, banging them into the dashboard.

"Stop that!" he growled. "Or else you're going to see just how mean I can be."

She crossed her arms over her chest and scowled. Then she blew a raspeberry . . . right in his ear. "You're an old grouch!"

Rumple craned his head around and gave her a Look. "Young lady, you better knock it off right now. I'm sorry we're stuck in traffic, but you're just going to have to deal with it. Why don't you play with your Leapster?"

Regina clamped her hands over her ears and yelled, "Not listening!"

Rumple nearly hit the car in front of him. Thoroughly out of patience now, he snapped, "Regina Nolan, don't make me pull this car over! Or else!"

"Or else what?" she asked impudently.

"Or else a certain naughty little girl is going to end up getting a swat and five minutes in the corner before we even get on the airplane, am I clear?" he warned.

"You can't put me in time out! There's no corner in here!" she pointed out aggravatingly.

"I'll make one just for you, young lady," he snorted. "Don't test me."

"You're mean, mean, mean!" she wailed. "I don't like you no more!"

"Regina. One."

"I'm telling Mommy!"

"Go ahead. Two."

Abruptly realizing he wasn't fooling around, she subsided. "No! No counting!"

"You going to behave?"

"Okay," she muttered, wearing a sulky look that would have done the Wicked Witch of the West proud. But at least she was quiet now.

Until she started sniffling.

Rumple wanted to bang his head against the steering wheel. "What's the matter now?"

"You're . . . mad at me," she sniveled, huge tears forming in her big eyes.

Rumple winced. "Hey, none of that now," he murmured, wondering if he'd been a bit too harsh with her. She was only three, after all. "If you'd start listening, I won't be mad at you, okay?"

"M'sorry!" she bawled.

Oh, great. This was just what he needed. Trapped in a car with a wailing toddler. He wanted to kill Baelfire and his bright ideas.

"Rumple?" Belle murmured sleepily, sitting up. "Why's Regina crying?"

"We're stuck in traffic and she's cranky," he replied.

"He yelled at me!" Regina sobbed.

Belle frowned. "Why?"

"Because she was throwing a fit."

"He's mean, Auntie Belle!"

Belle groaned. Knowing Regina, she'd probably tested Rumple to the max. "Shhh! Regina, stop crying. We're almost there. See all the lights and the people in the funny uniforms?" She pointed to some skycaps waiting outside the terminal.

"Yeah. What're they doing?" Distracted, Regina turned off the waterworks.

"They're taking everybody's luggage," Belle explained. "At least I think so."

"Why?"

"So they can put it on the plane," Belle told her.

Rumple managed to pull up to the terminal a few moments later.

"Are we there yet, Auntie Belle?"

"We are. Thank you God!" muttered Gold, putting the car in park and slowly getting out. He already had a headache and they hadn't even gotten on the plane yet. As he limped around the car to open the door for Belle, he saw Charming and Snow pull up behind him.

"She's all yours," he sighed in relief as he handed Belle out of the car, then went to unbuckle Regina from her car seat.

If the vacation had started out on this note, he shuddered to imagine what the rest of it might be like. He wondered if they sold Valium around here, because he sure as hell needed some, ASAP!

A/N: Okay, who thought poor Rumple was going to lose it here? And who remembers that familiar "don't make me pull this car over?" from their childhood? (raises hand—I do! And so do all my siblings, LOL!) I got inspired by watching the season premiere last night—which was awesome—and decided to give you the first chapter of this story. Hope you all liked! And thanks so much for your kind reviews on GS, dearies!

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