author's note: for becky.

i don't own anything.

"Do I intimidate you?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"I said," Lily threw herself down on the shiny black settee, and flung her legs over her boyfriend's knees, "do I intimidate you?"

Scorpius put his hand on her knee, and the fire crackled and burned behind him. A pair of second years scurried past, whispering eagerly together. Lily ignored them. "James said I'm intimidating. Do I intimidate you?" she asked again.

He screwed his nose up, like he was thinking hard. "No," he said eventually, "no, you don't intimidate me."

"Why not?"

"It's pretty hard to be intimidated by someone when you know they sing in their sleep."

"Shut up!" she laughed, and ran a hand through her long red hair (she'd inherited her mother's height and her grandmother's hair, and her grandfather's habits) "I do not sing in my sleep!"

"Right, yeah," he replied sarcastically, "you totally don't sing Weird Sisters songs in your sleep. Nope, you've never done that. Ever."

"I do not!" she pulled her legs off his, and he pouted.

"Next time you wake me up at half three in the morning singing Dance Like A Hippogriff, I'll remind you of this moment."

"If it bothers you that much, I won't sleep in your bed at all."

Scorpius smirked, and shuffled over the sofa towards her. "Oh, but you'd miss me."

"Don't flatter yourself, punk."

"You would," he rested his chin on her knees, and she looked away pointedly, but a smirk graced her features, so he knew she wasn't really mad at him, "you would miss me like the moon misses the sun."

"Calm down, Oscar, I'm pulling your leg."

He grinned, and leant forward to press a kiss to her smirking lips. "Who's Oscar?" he asked. She laughed.

"My older, more experienced lover."

"I thought that was me?"

"Not anymore, bucko," she replied lazily, and sunk back on the sofa, head resting on the arm, "now hush, I hear whispering."

"You know that your scheming is a huge turn on for me, don't you?"

"I said hush, Malfoy."

He laughed again, and sat back so their legs were overlapping, and their heads lay in exactly the same position on either end of the leather sofa. There was indeed whispering from a corner of the room. The two second years that had walked past earlier were muttering eagerly to each other.

"Yes, yes," one of them was saying, "yes, if we give it to the owl tomorrow, then he won't get it until Thursday, and then no one will be able to trace it to us!"

"But don't you want people to know it was us?"

"Why would we want the teachers to know we sent it, dummy?"

"No, but everyone else! Don't you want everyone else to know that we were the ones who sent the grossest kid in Slytherin a Howler? We'll be hailed as heroes!"

Lily's eyes, previously closed, snapped open. She tensed up, and Scorpius stretched his hand over to hers, but she snatched it up (he should've known; she wasn't a hand holding kind of girl) and leapt to her feet. The Weasley fire was kicking in. If there was one thing Lily Luna Potter couldn't stand, it was Slytherins versus fellow Slytherins.

"Are they talking about what I think they're talking about?"

"Sounds like it." Scorpius looked sideways at her. She had her hand in her hair, and her red lips were pursed, like she was deciding what her next move was.

"Slytherins don't pull stunts like that on other Slytherins, Merlin. Didn't they get the owl?"

"They're second years, babe, I-"

"Don't babe me!" she snapped, "Back me up here, Malfoy!"

He looked at the second years. They were young, naïve. Their chins were silk smooth, and their hair slightly greasy.

And they wanted to hurt a fellow snake. That went against the rules; Slytherins were cunning, yes, and ambitious, but they never hurt their own. Where you'll make real friends, the hat had said.

"Shall we have a word?"

"Shall we hex them into next Tuesday?"

"Lily…"

"Save it for the sack, Oscar, let's kick some arse."

She smiled widely, and he knew from experience that that was her game face. He'd seen it a million times before (he'd fallen in love with it).

Tossing back her long red hair, she took his arm as a gesture of solidarity, and they, the ice king and queen, strode towards the oblivious second years.

"Hi," Lily chirped, "we don't know you but I'll bet you know us. I'm Lily Potter, and this is-"

"Scorpius Malfoy," her boyfriend said smoothly, sticking out a hand (the second years glanced at one another with both fear and disguise on their pale faces), "Head Boy. Captain of the Quidditch Team. You're second years, right?"

They nodded, and Lily noticed their little hands were shaking. She crouched before them.

"We're neither scary nor intimidating, we promise," she said in a low voice, "but we swear to every Muggle deity, Merlin, Circe and Agrippa that if you go through with your little plan, we will destroy you. You can't pull stunts like that in Slytherin house. Ever."

"This is where you'll make real friends," Scorpius added, voice steady and calm, "never forget that."

"And if we hear you've been picking on anyone," Lily climbed to her feet, and joined arms with Scorpius again, "you'll know about it. Right, Scorpius?"

He nodded. "Thanks for your time kids."

Lily smiled her game face smile again, and the two second years scrambled away, muttering between themselves.

"They won't be going through with that prank, will they?"

"Doubt it."

She looked up at him, and her game face gave way to a real, brilliant smile, that made his heart swoop and butterflies flutter in his stomach.

"D'you wanna make out?"

"Fine by me."