I thought the world needed another Gremma AU to fix all the sad fangirl feels out there. So I figured I'd start one.

Disclaimer: I still don't own OUAT or any of the songs I reference. I'm still pretty upset about it, but what are ya gonna do?

"Nobody said it was easy; no one ever said it would be this hard. Oh, take me back to the start." - Coldplay

"What if you could turn back the hands of time?" Peter Pan's voice echoed in her ears and all around the cave's walls. "Bring back a life that'd been lost too soon. Would you do it?"

He wasn't speaking to Emma; he was speaking to Henry. And as she watched the scene play out before her, she knew her son - her eyes moved to Regina's, then Neal's - their son, was standing tall in front of Neverland's darkest trickster, jutting out his chin even as he held his beating heart in the palm of his hand.

"Would I do it?" Henry paused, like he was thinking. "Well yeah, I would. See, even though my family's back together-" (And as he said this, Emma swore his eyes had flickered to the spot where she was standing) "-there's still someone missing."

Her own heart thundered in her ears as the thought occurred to her that a piece of Henry's heart, a piece of his life, could be empty somehow. How could there be someone else he needed? How could she live with herself as his mother, as one of his mothers, knowing that she could never fill that space?

"Someone missing? Who could possibly be missing from his life when he's got us?" Regina asked in a low murmur, mirroring her thoughts. "All of us."

"Shhh, let the kid talk a minute," Neal whispered, bringing a finger up to his lips to shush her.

Emma was momentarily impressed when Regina didn't say another word, but threw her hands up and cast a spell that amplified Pan's words instead.

She wanted to believe that the kid looked genuinely concerned when he tilted his head to the side and asked, "Someone missing? And who could that be, Henry?"

"My family and I…" He paused, and it sounded like he was swallowing hard so his voice wouldn't break on his words. "We uh….we don't talk about him that much anymore."

Pan nodded his head and let his arms fall to his sides. "I know what it's like to lose someone. I too, have lost. But I could bring him back for you."

"I want him back more than anything else," Henry asked as he dropped his gaze to the heart of the truest believer - his heart - laying in his hand. "But I can't ask you to do that for me."

She could see the lines of Pan's eyebrows cast deep shadows over his eyes when he said, "I could help you, Henry. Don't you want that?"

"I do." Henry said, nodding.

"All you have to do is place your heart into their body. With it, they can live the life they didn't get to finish. But if you give up your heart for this person, you will become forever in their debt. Can you live with that price?"

"I can." His voice became too hard, too grave for an eleven-year old, when he told Peter, "But there's someone I need to ask about it first."

And then he turned away from Pan, deep-blue eyes meeting hers in an instant when he said, "Mom? It's okay, I know you're there."

"Henry-" Emma's voice got caught in her throat and the bracelet she wore on her wrist, the bracelet she'd never taken off since the night the ambulance didn't get there fast enough, felt like it sunk a little deeper into her skin. "Henry, I don't know what you're asking me."

"Mom…I want to bring him back," Henry murmured as a single tear, gleaming silver in the shadows, rolled down his cheek and into the sand beneath his feet. "I want to bring Graham back. But I need to know if you're okay with that."

In that second, her heart beat so hard in the hollow of her ribcage that she could've sworn it was going to fly out of her chest and swell up like a live, thrashing thing on the ground.

"Emma," Neal's voice, rough as the gravel driveway they'd never had, echoed in the shell of her ear. "Baby, you know you don't have to do this if you don't want to. But if you do…." His breath was just a whisper on the wind, but in that breath she thought she could hear the sound of his heart breaking on the words he was about to say.

"If you do, I won't stop you. I'll still be here for you. I swear, I'm always here for you."

She swallowed hard at the sincerity in his voice - she'd needed to hear it since the day he'd left her hanging at the parking garage. Needed to hear it since the first night she'd spent in jail, writing his name on the wall with the dirt on her fingertips. And after all these years, she'd gotten it. He was finally being honest with her.

And it was time she was honest with him.

"When I said that all I cared about was getting our son back, I left something, or more accurately, someone out. I didn't want to open up an old wound again. So I thought..." She let out a sigh that made her sound so much older, so much more world-weary, than she really was. "I thought I could pretend I didn't still love him, because it would be easier for me to live a lie than bring up all the pain I went through over losing him."

She swore she could see Regina's face light up with recognition and her eyes glisten with tears as Emma held up her left arm for Neal to see - the bracelets that covered it were all important to her, but there was one that stood out the most. One that wasn't really a bracelet at all. She pointed to it in the shadows of the cave and put on a tight-lipped smile so her voice wouldn't break as she spoke.

"But I still wear this shoelace-" She swallowed hard. "Graham's shoelace, every day, and I can't keep pretending that doesn't mean anything. I can't pretend that I don't have any feelings for him," She laughed at the way the tears ghosted down the bridge of her nose, struggled to speak for a minute as the weight of the confession washed over her. "Because I love him, too. And I probably always will."

And just like he had two days ago, Neal flashed her a smile that swept some of the shattered pieces of her heart back together again. It was raw and painful and it left an ache in her chest. That single smile told her everything she needed to know - that he did love her, that he'd always love her.

But it also told her the things he didn't say when he moved forward to kiss her on the forehead, then down the bridge of her nose. He held her there for a minute, lips still pressed against her skin. His hands were warm on her back and they felt good, comforting, as the heat of them sank through her tank top and lingered on her spine.

"Thank you, Emma," Neal murmured into her ear before he finally stepped away and waved her forward to let the others know what her choice was.

"Mom? Have you decided?" Henry's voice was quiet, like if he spoke too loud it'd shatter the spell, the hope, that seemed to have fallen over the cave.

"Yes, Henry," Emma said with a sure smile gracing her features. "I want you to bring Graham back."

She couldn't help but shiver from the crown of her head down to the tips of her toes when she heard Gold mutter, "true love wins again" under his breath.

chapter one end