~AN: If you don't like f/f relationships, I would hate to waste your time here and advise you to leave. Strong-ish language! (Probable OOC)~
~Disclaimer: If I owned it, you'd know it~
~POV: Katniss~
~Thank you for your consideration~
Summery: She called me what she had never called me before…
She called me brainless, idiot, dumbass.
She called me impossible, hopeless, annoying.
She called me twat, ass, pain in the neck.
She called me weak, sad, a joke.
She called me girl on fire.
She called me mocking jay…
I let her. I watched her laugh, smirk, and roll her eyes at me. I watched her face turn innocent when someone noticed we were screaming at each other. I watched the terror appear in her eyes when we stood by the door, safe from the rain. I watched her stare at her scars and bruises in disgust, and saw the hate for the Capitol in her eyes.
One day, she caught me watching.
"See something you like, brainless?" she spat, her eyes going guarded as she faced me. When I didn't respond, her face fell. "Sorry."
The apology came from no where, and she started to laugh. A painful, twisted laugh. It took me a moment to realize there were tears running down her cheeks, glinting in the light of our shared, cramped room.
"What's so funny?" I asked weakly. Her laughter dried up and it was just her crying. I hugged my arms to my shoulders, looking away. She hated when I saw her cry.
"You," she sniffed. I opened my mouth to argue, but she went on, "You and your ignorant act. Your stupid face, your stupid voice. Your stupid everything. It's like you know nothing."
"Jeez, just lay it on me then," I muttered, rolling my eyes.
"Don't you see, Katniss? I hate you-"
"That isn't exactly news, Johanna." A sick feeling was rising in my stomach and my throat went all squeezy, like I was about to cry.
"You didn't let me finish, fuck face."
"That's a new one." The glare she fixed me with made me freeze. Then she closed her eyes, exhaled loudly and pressed her fingers to her forehead.
"It's so cliché! I hate you, but I love you."
She didn't open her eyes. I couldn't open my mouth. Surprise. Shock. The only emotions expected since everyone likes to catch me completely off guard.
"Johanna, I-" was all I could manage before she cut me off.
"Don't… Katniss, don't."
"I didn't… I didn't know."
"You have a habit of not knowing."
I willed my legs to move, to stand and walked towards her. Before I could touch her, she sat on her bed, wiping the tears off her cheeks, cringing at the dampness. I knelt on the mattress next to her, awkwardly patting her shoulder. Her body stiffened at the touch, but as the pats turned to slowly rubbed circles on her back, she relaxed. She sniffed, rubbed her eye one more time, then went to lean away.
I hugged her before she could get too far away. I felt her arms follow, strong around my shoulders despite their owner shaking next to me.
"Now… I'm not saying I feel the same way," my mouth said before I let myself think, "But I-"
"I already know, Katniss," she cut me off, breath hot against my shoulder. I loosened my grip, leaning back to see her face.
"Now you didn't let me finish, brainless." That earned me a watery smile. I half smiled back before continuing, "But I know I need you in my life."
The hope in her eyes made my heart hammer in my chest. Her lips were parted. That time, I anticipated her next move.
"Can I… kiss you?" she asked, voice shaking more than her body. I nodded quickly.
Her lips felt different compared to Peeta's and Gale's. Softer, fuller. I could taste the heat that still surged throughout her body despite her torture. And I could feel the caution behind her action of affection.
She was afraid she would loose someone else.
When the kiss was over, she kept her forehead pressed against mine, looking down. Her voice was steadier this time,
"Katniss, I-."
"Shhh," I hushed her, wrapping my arms around her in another hug. She sighed against me, returning the embrace again.
"Thank you."
… And one day, she called me what she had never called me before.
She called me hers.