Name: Galaxy1001D

Age: Too old to be watching cartoons

Race: Human

Sex: Been a while

Galaxy1001D's Guide to Writing:

A while back someone asked me for advice on writing. Let me share with you what I've learned since contributing to this website. I can sum it up in eight points.

First, start small. Don't write your 30-chapter epic for your first fic. I recommend one-shots or stories with less than ten chapters if you are just starting out. If I could write a full-length novel, I wouldn’t be wasting my time writing fan fiction, I’d be writing something for professional publication.

(I’m writing about cartoons because that’s what I can write. My first stories were one-shots that broke the fourth wall and made fun of fanfiction rather than being an actual story taking place in the Kim Possible or Tenchi Muyo universes. Once I got through the clunky stages, I began writing stories under twenty chapters in length. As I learn as I go, each story gets longer.)

Two, know how it ends. I know it sounds backwards, but it’s easier to write if you know how your story is going to end. That makes foreshadowing a lot easier, you know. Don't break this one... I can tell you from painful experience you don't want to break this one.

Three, write when you’ve got something to say. Remember your creative writing classes and English Literature classes remember things like theme and mood. What is this story about? Is there anything that all of us hacks writing fan fiction forgot to write? Correct that oversight! If there is a cool scene in your head, figure out how the characters got there and where they go after the scene is over.

Four, don’t worry about being original. According to Aristotle, there are only eight plotlines. We all could have stopped writing after William Shakespeare died, but we didn’t. You can teach a new dog an old trick. If I had an original bone in my body, I would be writing an original novel instead of messing around with fan fiction.

Five, write what you know. (The fact that I’m writing fanfiction for cartoons is pretty humiliating.) If you don't know it, then read up on it. Odds are, you will write about what interests you. People naturally get good at what they're interested in.

Six, write it out and write from the heart. You don’t have to pander to the masses until the second rewrite. Get what you want to say out on paper (or pixels) before you forget what you want to say. You can always go back and edit it for television later. A lot of controversial subjects find their way into science fiction because they can be disguised.

Seven, if you’re not making money and not having fun, don’t do it. You don’t owe us anything.

Eight, if you got a clear idea of what you want to say, don’t get sidetracked. Don’t let advice like this or bad reviews distract you. Until we offer to write it for you, you are your own boss. Don’t fill your stories with unnecessary fat. Keep it lean and mean!

Update: A lot of time has passed since I've written my profile. Perhaps I should update it with some other painful lessons I've learned since I've started posting. Mind you, the tips I give below are only applicable if you're interested in having people actually read and review your stories.

First of all, when you post your chapters, be sure to format them so that they're readable. I can't tell you how many times I've skipped a story because all the words were crammed into huge crowded paragraphs or the whole thing was in bold face. Use the preview function on this website people, or it won't matter if you're writing Shakespeare or not.

Second: Don't be afraid to proofread your own work. I usually print my stuff and proofread it with a pencil. You'd be surprised how many times a typo or bad phrase is invisible on the screen but leaps right out to you on the printed page. As a matter of fact, reading and rereading your own material can be a godsend when you get stuck. Many times I've come up with an ending by reading my own unfinished story and asking myself how I think it will end.

Third: Don't bother posting your story until you can come up with a decent name and summary to advertise it. If you can't come up with a one or two sentence summary, why should anyone want to read pages of your stuff?

Fourth: This one was a hard one for me to learn. Any review, even a negative review is better than no review. A review, positive or negative means that your work has affected someone enough that they wrote back. For me, if a story doesn't have one review per thousand words it usually means nobody is interested. And whatever you do, don't respond immediately to a negative review! Think about whether or not you want to respond at all. Take your time; lots of it. People send negative reviews for all sorts of reasons. Sometimes they even have something to do with something you posted.

As a final note, if you got what it takes to be the next J. K. Rowling, by all means stop posting to this website, get on with your book, and make some extra money! If you feel that you need some practice first, or just want to write for fun, share what you got with us. Although some of us out here can be jerks, most of us are aspiring writers like yourself who are only too happy to encourage a fellow author in need.

Well, I hope this helps more than it hurts. Good luck with your stories. They say that everybody has a good book in them or a story to tell. Go out and tell your story.