OhEmGee!!!

i havent been on in forever! i randomly stumbled onto it again a couple of weeks ago and was shocked that i had forgotten it! (mind you i had kept writing just not fanfiction, i've finished a novel that has yet to be published, yay) so i deceided to come back and at least try to finish off the stories that had been left unfinished.

to anyone that was reading my stories, i apologise for not updating in years haha... i suck....

Quotes i like :)

§ Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas.

§ Specify that your drive-through order is to go. It confuses people.

§ My imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems.

§ When they put "unknown" at the end of a quote, it's probably because they don't know how to spell "anonymous"

§ Don't get high on Life; cereal hurts when you put it up your nose.

§ I'm not a vegetarian because i love animals; i'm a vegetarian becaus i hate plants.

§ Never go to bed angry. Stay up and plot your revenge.

§ Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?

§ The tiger can't change his spots. No, wait, he did! Good for him!

§ If swimming is so good for your figure, then explain whales!

§ There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

§ Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

§ Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?!

§ Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.

§ I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree with them.

§ "One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures."

§ Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'?

§ Always remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else.

§ “…” “…” “” “??” “...!” “…?” “Dot dot dot!” “Aggg!” “?”

§ Stupid ninjas! All I do is sneak around their village planning all their deaths and the throw a kunai at me! How rude!

§ “Hey! If I can travel back in time five hundred years and marry a half-blood youkai then why can’t I go to a school for magic?”

§ I was un-cool before un-cool was cool. -A sticker

§ Every time you call Al a robot. God kills a kitten. -FMA icon

§ They say curiousity killed the cat, but it was me. –Unknown

§ Screw you guys, I'm goin' home. -E. Cartman

§ I'm gonna go in my little corner and be emo now... -My friend

§ Dance like no one is watching. –Unknown

§ I loose IQ points when I talk to you... -unknown

§ If you come downstairs and my legs are torn off, then there's a problem. -I read this somewhere, and fell in love with it.

§ "Life is like a bowl of cherries: everyone's a fruit."

§ "The problem with defending the purity of the English language is that English is about as pure as a cribhouse whore. We don't just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary."

§ "Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected our generation, we'd all run around in a dark room munching pills and listening to repetitive music."

§ "Somewhere people are plotting against you and I am probably among them."

§ "A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals and you know it."

§ "Well think about it. If I actually followed the plan, I'd have little chance to half ass things later on. Improvisation is key."

§ "You couldn't get a clue during the clue mating season in a field full of horny clues if you smeared your body with clue musk and did the clue mating dance."

§ "If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy."

§ "On a side note, I think this is the first time anyone has ever used the word misinformation when talking about something we posted here. I find it very exciting to think that I am spreading misinformation. I may move up to half-truths next and then eventually onto wild speculation."

§ "And that is why I haven't been hit by any cast-iron skillets in my 17-years of life. Not because I don't deserve it, but because I don't fuck around with people that hit people with cast-iron skillets."

§ "You know, it would be REALLY funny if someone found irrefutable proof that Jesus was a gay black man."

§ "Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to."

§ "The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese."

§ "Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines."

§ "You! Out Of The Gene Pool - Now!"

§ "Boldly Going Nowhere"

§ "Honk If You've Never Seen An Uzi Fired From A Car Window."

§ "those who think they know everything, annoy those of us that do"

§ "Dying is just natures way of saying 'Hey! Your not alive anymore!'"

§ "Don't criticize my mess unless you'd like to become part of it."

§ 92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your arse off.

§ Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this and put it in your profile.

§ If you hate those obnoxious preppy people PLEASE copy this in your profile.

§ If you have ever been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing maniacally, copy and paste this into your profile.

§ If you have ever choked on your own spit, copy and paste this onto your profile

§ 'It's mind over matter I don't mind cause you don't matter.'

§ 'Just 'cause I'm standin' here doesn't meen I'm listening'

§ 'Curiosity killed the cat, but fullfilment brought it back'

§ ' A wise man once said, ' go ask a woman.' '

§ ' You're a failure at life... just go die...'

§ ' Never knock on Death's door, ring the doorbell and run away... he hates that.'

§ ' When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how in seven hells you did it.'

§ ' I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather...not screaming like the passengers in his car.'

§ ' I am not crazy! U know what! The voices don't like u anymore!'

§ ' Death is life’s way of saying you’ve been fired.'

§ ' Stupid kills, unfortunately not fast enough.'

§ ' They say the truth will set you free. But then why is it that every time I tell the truth I get sent to my room?'

§ ' Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?'

§ ' I got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.'

§ ' Don't think of yourself as an ugly person, just a beautiful monkey.'

§ ' Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.'

§ ' The only thing standing between me and total happiness is reality.'

§ ' I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.'

§ ' Loves a two-way street and I think your car just died.'

§ ' Saying I'm a bad guy is just a good guys opinion.'

§ 'Friends help you move; real friends help you move the body.'

§ '3 kinds of people: Those who can count and those who can't.'

§ 'The sun will come out tomorrow...or else it will be really cold.'

§ 'You know perfectly well what the rules are and you've erased them all and written up new ones.'

§ 'You live life right on the edge - maybe even over it - but with you and your friends you don't fall off.'

§ 'Better to die on your feet than live on your knees.'

§ 'Heaven didn't want me and Hell thinks I'll take over.'

§ 'Everyday I think people can't get any stupider. Everyday I'm proven horribly wrong.'

§ Don't follow in my footsteps...I walk into walls.

§ "You're not drunk until you have to hold onto the grass to keep from falling off the Earth."

§ "Hey, Shippo, your village called, they said they're missing their idiot."

§ "I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of dirt. And guess what's inside it?"

§ "Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver."

§ "I'm not racist...I hate everyone equally."

§ "I can multitask...I can breath, talk, and annoy you at the same time."

§ "You loser."

§ 'When my mother is mad... she doesn't glare daggers, oh no... she glares pitch-forks!'

§ '(T.T) Oh God we've finally lost her...'

§ Yuusuke dodged the leaves expertly, no stranger to deadly flora

§ 'Annoying the world one person at a time...'

§ "What is the point of life if it is just our fate to die."

§ 'I once shot a man just to watch him die...but I got distracted and missed it.'

§ 'If you put your laptop computer on your desk, why dont you put your desktop computer on your lap?'

§ 'When a cannibal goes on a diet do they stick to midgets?'

§ 'There is nothing scarier than your grandma telling you she's wearing a thong'

§ 'This is NARUTO time, meaning you SHUT UP and listen!'

§ 'I'm trying to see things from your point of view but I can't get my head that far up my ass.'

§ 'I have PMS and a handgun, any questions?'

§ 'yesterday someone broke my heart, today i broke thier skull.'

§ "I'm not Crazy. I'm psycotic. There's a difference"

§ "when you're blue, a good friend will ask what's wrong. A true friend will try to dislodge what's chocking you."

§ "When you get thrown in jail, a good friend will come bail you out. A true friend will be in there with you going "Damn, we fed up."

§ "A good friend will help you up when you fall. A true friend will laugh at you and then trip you again."

§ "A good friend will keep you secrets when you ask them too. A true friend will keep their mouths shut without you asking them."

§ "Silence is golden, duct tape is silver."

§ "There's nothing that can't be fixed with: ducttape, chocolate, or by running it over."

§ "My attention span is just short enough to annoy you and ignore you all at the same time."

§ "You know you're crazy when you know the Men in white by name."

§ "COME SPARKLES, WE SHALL DESTROY CANADA"

§ "one by one the penguins slowly steal my sanity..." wristband...

§ " NO! I didnt stab him , I was carving a turkey and , he ran into my knife...10 times..."

§ When life hates you, and you hate life ATTACK THE MIMES!

§ Who ever said nothing was impossible, never tried slamming a revolving door.

§ Mirrors don’t talk, and luckily for you they don’t laugh.

§ Last night I played a blank tape at full blast, the mime next door when nuts.

§ If you have ever felt the undenilable urge to slam your head into something, weather it is another person or not copy this into your profile

§ A friend trys to help you when you get hurt, a true friends sits there laughing their ass off saying, 'Dude, you're an idiot!'

§ If you think Barney is a overgrown, gay, purple, extinct, baby singer, dinosaur and a crack addiect. Copy and past this on your profile

§ If you think that Itachi is the smexiest character in any anime whatsoever, copy this and paste it on to your profile.

§ If you think that all childrens' shows are gay, copy and paste this onto your profile.

§ If you have ever tripped over a bug, put this on your profile.

§ If your parents have ever told you that you weren't normal, and are proud of it copy this to your profile.

§ If you or someone you know has ever run through something (glass door, window, wall, ect) copy this to your profile.

§ If you enjoy glomping people from behind copy this to your profile.

§ If you have ever walked and all of a sudden ended up falling on your ass copy this to your profile.

§ If you have ever walked and all of a sudden ended up falling on your ass more then once copy this to your profile.

§ If you have an army of purple cats with rabies and with flame throwers at your command copy this onto your profile.

§ If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile.

§ If you think that Mickey mouse and his friends seriously went to a bar then copy this onto your profile.

§ SPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! If you are really random put this on your profile.

§ If you have ever laughed maniacally, choked and/or gagged from lack of oxygen, and then fainted dramatically, copy and paste this onto onto your profile

§ If you have ever tried to fly without a plane or any other flying machine/type thing, and SUCCEEDED, copy and paste this into your profile

§ For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself (I find that I am a very easy opponent, I should practice more). Crazy is when you practice thumbwars. So if you're crazy, copy/paste this into your profile.

§ A true friend is someone who will try to answer the "eraser bits" question and have a long conversation about it. A friend is someone who won't say anything when you cry for no reason, but will start sobbing too, just to help you cry. If you have a true friend, copy/paste this into your profile. -Kudos to TrueThinker-

§ If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy/paste this into your profile.

§ There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy/paste this into your profile.

§ If you've ever busted a move/burst into song randomly, copy/paste this into your profile.

§ if you hate Kikyo, copy this into your profile.

§ if you have ever thought of how Inuyasha would look if he fused with Sesshomaru, then sweatdropped and beat your head against something to get the image out, copy this into your profile.

§ if you have ever run into a telephone pole, copy this onto your profile.

§ if you have ever yelled something random in a large crowd of people, copy this onto your profile

Random stuff i stole from other peoples pages :)

1. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first 3 letters of real name plus izzle): Jesizzle

2. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal): Purple Panda (0.0)

3. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, and current street name): Shirley Terry (...that doesnt sound right)

4. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, last 3 letters of mom's maiden name): Gryjegou (HA! it looks like i just typed with my nose or something!)

5. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink): Black apple juice (...i think that would make me ill....)

6. YOUR ARAB NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maidenname, 3rd letter of you dads middle name, 1st letter of a siblings first name, last letter of your moms middle name):Eyioaae (...all vowels...creepy)

7. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mothers middle name): Gough

8. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one your pets): Black Pepper (...LOL)

List twelve of your favorite characters from your fandom, in no particular order

1. L Lawliet (DN)

2. Matt (DN)

3. Miroku (IY)

4. Kakashi (naru)

5. Near (DN)

6. Kotoko (chobits)

7. Mello (DN)

8. Nabiki (ranma)

9. Seshomaru (IY)

10. Jiraya (Naruto)

11. Sango (IY)

12. Chii (chobits)

1. Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?

Kotoko and Sango ... how in the...? i would just to figure out how someone did it?!

2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot?

...I suppose, he is all cooooool under that mask! ;)

3. What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?

Chii got Nabiki pregnant ... Hideki is buying some wiiiierd devices for Chii, He IS a pervert!

4. Can you recall any fics about Nine?

lol yeah, lots of seshy flicks, i should really finish my fluffy pitails story....

5. Would Two and Six make a good couple?

...now that i think about it... MATT WOULD LOVE HERE! aside from her size. omg Matt and Kotoko! ... i think i wanna make a fic for that now!

6. Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?

OMG NEAR GETS RAPED BY EITHER JIRAIYA OR SESSHOMARU! ... something just went wrong here....

7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?

Mello walks in on Matt and Chii having sex... hmmm Mello would probably be extremly confused... possibly ask Matt to make him one...MUHAHAAA!!!

8. Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.

Miroku and...Jiraiya?Jiraiya deceided one day to try out that sexy jutsu that Naruto kept using against him... He thought it was hilarious until a sweet talking monk comes along, and asks Jiraiya to bear his children...

9. Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?

L and Nabiki... hmmm both are smart... *looks up* couldnt find any, although that could be funny!

10. Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.

MelloXChii - Matt's sex toys? Bwahaha no um... hmmmm 'The ones left behind'?

11. Does anyone on your friends list read Three yet?

Coarse they do! :)

12. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?

uuuh probably Sango is a pretty popular character :)

13. Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?

MattXKakashiXNear... ahem... i doubt it.

14. If you wrote a Song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?

hmmm i dont ussually do song fics but for Nabiki...

"The best things in life are free
But you can keep 'em for the birds and bees
Now give me money, (that's what I want) that's what I want."

15. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?

LXKotokoXChii
uuuu warning, L gets... creative with technology! :)

16. When was the last time you read a fic about Five?

Near?ussually he's just a side character in some of the ones i read, but one purely on him... a while

17. "(1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (9) runs off with (4). (1), brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3).

L and Mello are in a happy relationship until Sesshomaru runs off with Kakashi. L, brokenhearted has a hot one night stand with Sango and a breif unhappy affair with Chii, the follows the wise advice of Near and finds true love with Miroku.Mello made L happy? well they could share sweets! Sesshomaru runs of with Kakashi...? i can imagine them screaming "WHITE HAIR FOREVER" for some wierd ass reason. WHY COULDNT CHII MAKE L HAPPY! and Sango you devil you ;) but then L finds your canon relationship to pair off with so i guess its ok...:D

What title would you give this fic?

WHITE HAIR FOREVER!

18. How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?

Mello and Nabiki? surprisingly, that isn't that surprising.... although i have a feeling Mello would eventually shoot her...

19. Eight walks into Ten's room while he/she is changing, what would happen?

Nabiki walks in on Jiraiya changing...
Nabiki would scream and run and jiraiya would make some sexual comment towards her ... which would be damn creepy

20. Three and Four are fighting, but then six comes in and brings Three and Four together as a couple.

Miroku and Kakshi are fighting, but then Kotoko comes in...
Oh Kotoko, always the voice of reason! :)

21. Five and Nine are talking when Seven runs in between yelling "I love (One)!"

Near and Sesshomaru are chatting it up and mello runs in and says he loves L.
Near would fiddle with his hair and ignore him. Sesshomaru might kill him for interupting

22. Ten and Two are in the middle of a battle when seven comes flying through screaming "Super (Seven's name)"

Jiraiya and Matt are in a battle and Mello comes flying in saying "SUPER MELLO!"Matt would assume Mello has been slipped something and tell Mello to calm down and that he will help him in a minute, then Kicks Jiraiya's ass on mario kart (cause in my mind is a video game battle!)

23. Five was sleeping with Eight, but then finds out that Eight was also sleeping with Seven, Nine, and Six.

Near was sleeping with Nabiki, but then finds out that Nabiki is also sleeping with Mello, Sesshomaru and Kotoko...Nabiki you dog you!

24. Ten kills Four, Four's last words?

Jiraiya kills Kakashi

Kakashi: "noooo! i havent finished your latest novel!!!!"

25. Two proposes to Three.

Matt proposes to Miroku?
...0.0MIROKU YOU PERVERT! STOP STEALING MY MEN! MATT IS MIIIIIINE!

26. One, two, three, four, and five are fighting when Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, and Ten comes to watch. What happens?

L, Matt, Miroku, Kakashi, and Near are fighting when Kotoko, Mello, Nabiki, sesshomaru and Jiraiya come to watch...

Matt: You stole my Game you brat! no wonder Mello hates you! *tackles*

L: if you do not show me what is underneath that mask, i will be forced to Kick you...

Miroku: If all of you dont shut up soon i will Wind tunnel all your asses to wherever the hell this thing goes (personally i've always wondered...)

Mello: haha go Matt Go!

Sesshomaru and Jiraiya save Kakashi and Near: "WHITE HAIR FOREVER! AHAHA!!!" *they run off stroking each others hair*

Kotoko*sitting on Nabiki's shoulder: My you are all stupid.

L: AM NOT! ... smart detective... *pouts*

Nabiki: Hey Matt i can get your Game back... for a price ;)

Me: AHAHAHAHAAA!!!! CRACK! and now i have "WHITE HAIR FOREVER!" stuck in my head lol

STORY STATS

Finished

Eyebrows - Finished (one shot)

The Fallen Preistess and a notebook that kills - Finished (yaya!)

Kagome's soul - finished (was going to make a sequel if it was well received, since it wasn't i might not bother)

Like Father, Like Daughter, Like Mother like son - FINISHED! wooo, beware, the last chapter is terrible... i should stop drunken-fic'ing!

Other

N/A

Co-Authoring

All have been Scrapped ... since i can no longer get in touch with my previous co-authors....