Hi! My name is Grace! I've got a wife and three kids and I work in a button factory...

Totally kidding. I'm an unmarried childless chick who works in the food service industry, because no one is hiring teachers at the moment. Through this line of work I have developed a very thick skin and an amazing, (literally) award-winning, plastic smile.

I enjoy lots of random music, reading, and doing Sudoku. I can usually be found on the couch with the dog watching "Deadliest Catch," "Boardwalk Empire," "Big Love" (yes, I watch the lying polygamist show), and "Glee" along with anything on E! that catches my eye. If I'm not there, I'm in the computer chair writing, standing by my faithful coffee pot, or cleaning the kitchen, because it's always a mess. I love a good glass of wine, and I adore spending time with my best girlfriend indoors, bitching about our boyfriends, and getting absolutely nothing done. I tend to project this into my stories.

I sometimes take a long time to update my fics because my life is random, and other people write such wonderful things. I don't know how I came up with my pen name beyond a clever play on words, and I always have music playing. If I'm writing, that music makes its way in. I'm a musician. I can't help being inspired. Seriously, listen to the 4th movement of "Beethoven's 9th" all the way through (including the bouncy part) and try to sit entirely still. If you can, get your pulse checked.

"Life and Death with the Original Succubus," my Post BD Mike/Tanya fic is FINISHED! But if you like it, put it on alert, because I feel like they're going to dance into my imagination again and wind up in a Word document that I will feel the urge to share with you, my always delightful and small, but faithful, band of readers.

I continue to trek on through first experience after first experience in my series of one shots, "Firsts." It tells the story of Jacob and Renesmee in a series of one shots. And yes, I do take requests into consideration.

Amazon is where I buy most of my books. I like books. I buy 'em used, new, whatever. I like it when library books have that library book smell and you feel like a little kid playing on the jungle gym at school when life was carefree and the biggest worry was getting your homework done.

I digress. What was I talking about?...

Welcome to my mind. It's a scary place. Enjoy its vomit. Leave reviews.

UNRELATED SIDE NOTE: Please do not hate me for my lack of updates. In August, I was hired to teach part time after school had started. I've been spending the past few months working to get myself up to speed so I can actually start my career (four years post college graduation). I only mention this because I don't want anyone to think I died, or (worse) no longer care. I'm alive. Still in the hell we call Illinois with my bleeding heart. Still working far too much for far too little, but finally using my degree. Expect some updates over the holiday break, because I need it as much as you do...