WARNING: MATURE CONTENT.

May 11, 2017: Wow! I haven't written here in a long time!

I have to admit RL has me very busy and my cherished weekends have been absorbed by the disruption at home - this is the story I'm sticking to since only two of you know about the scenario I had to write down in order to concentrate on anything else. But I'm still here! I have drafts to the next chapters of both TTSTTA and APFU it's just... the time to finish!

APFU - I'm not sure why some are resistant to the discussion on Yuuki, considering it is a major thing that divides Zero and Kaname's relationship. Should be tackled, I think... And I recently read somewhere that good fanfiction should be about canon! No one sent me the manual! ;P But if you are patient you'll notice it's like that song... the story is not really about Yuuki...

06/05/2016: Hi there!

Some may have noticed that I've been letting TTSTTA take me over - not to mention the Kaname Mpreg story KP has me thinking about - but only because I have opened a can of worms with APFU and I want to do the boys justice with the next set of chapters - yes, I have performance anxiety *sigh*.

Also, RL has become more hectic again as I am working for myself now. As such I am taking a break to ponder the next set of chapters on both stories and catch up on my day job.

But you know me, I'll show up in a few months with some scenario that pisses off half my readership... but at least I'll show up!

Later.

LP

03/02/2016: Happy New Year!

My, how time flies! I had started to update APFU again and began... TTSTTA (?). I am getting busier however, and RL hit me hard last weekend - my nephews (3 and 11 months) visited for the weekend. It was chaos.

Still the next chapters of both are buzzing around in my head. Soon I will have to write them down to get peace, so don't fear. Thank you to those of you who have always reviewed and to the new reviewers who are kind enough to let me know that you appreciate my efforts! I will try not to let you down... within reason.

KP - Mpreg in APFU? Oh dear...

LP

04/23/2015: Hi there and happy new year! Ahem...

I've decided to take the criticism to heart and take some time to regroup on APFU. I'm not sulking! Just taking break to clear my mind and then to decide on how best to serve the story, the characters and you.

Later.

LP

07/03/2014: July already. It'll be Christmas soon...

I've nothing to say. I've been very neglectful but I really have been swamped. I'm practically a workaholic! But out of necessity, I assure you.

I'll see what I can do with my vacation in October unless I can get a free moment before then. Until then, please know that I see the words of encouragement, appreciate them and want to write all the better for you. It's just... not a good time.

Later.

LP

12/02/2013: OMG!!! I last updated my profile in January!!! That's terrible!

It shows how busy I've been though. With the ongoing recession here my boss cut back on staff... and I've been fighting to keep my head above water ever since. I've no time for my boys!(so sad). I've got plans but...

All the best for the season. And, for what it's worth, I'm still here.

01/13/2013: Happy New Year!

I'm still here but very busy with work. Been pondering and researching several complicated issues with no time for my boys. I do have the next chapter in mind though so... until then.

LP

9/04/2012: It's September already? Goodness! I've had chapter 92 of APFU playing with for three weeks now going through my various mood swings. I will eventually get fed up and post it so I can go on with the story. I hope. Lol.

LP

6/24/2012: Hi! I'm still here. I've been going in to work on the weekends so time to think and/or write has been limited. *sigh* I have begun chapter 90 of APFU and hopefully will conclude it by the end of this week.

The other "fork"? I don't want to say because I am still thinking of using it. Who knows, maybe I will find the time to truly do justice by this character as I really want to. At that point you will see but I won't ruin it as my muse is challenged enough already.

Don't worry about my listening to nay-sayers. As they say in my country I am rather "own-way" (stubborn). I didn't get to 90-odd chapters by being deterred by other stubborn people who, quite frankly, have a much, much greater choice of K/Z, Z/K fanfiction than I had when I first found this site and can easily find what they are looking for elsewhere. Why do people read clearly labelled OC or M/M stories and then complain that there are OC's of M/M in the story? (I know scientists are busy solving world hunger and finding cures for cancer but I would honestly like to know the answer to that one...) I welcome new readers, people who want to challenge themselves and criticism but really now...

That being said, I do recognize the real concern here. I want to assure you that I remember this began with Kaname and Zero. I try to keep them as the focus but their lives will evolve and as one person pointed out the conversations do become similar and repetitive if one is not careful. So what should I do, especially after 90 chapters? There are two options. The other is to add new characters, new situations, new challenges and see how they weather them. Together. Unfortunately, I will lose some people - they did come for the K/Z/K after all - but hopefully, if I work hard enough on the plot, others will be curious enough to keep going until it is time to exercise the other option.

Anyway, for the twenty-odd people still here, see you this weekend! Hopefully...

LP

04/29/2012: *sigh* Still sorting out some plot-lines and character motivations in APFU. Beginning to realize this is quite a fork in the road and the one I would like to choose will take a fair amount of commitment... Anyway, what I'm saying is I'm still here and will try to get my act together and start again soon.

LP

04/02/2012: It's April already!! Goodness!

No updates for the next two weeks. I'm going on a trip with the family! Nowhere exotic but it's a start. I'll do my best to get my muse to concentrate on APFU while we're shopping or climbing, um, I think she said pitons (?) for a quick chapter on my return but don't put the house on it. She's easily distracted by shopping and eye-candy of... a certain kind... *ahem*

LP

03/19/12: No stats and I just posted! (*depression sets in*)

LP

03/05/2012: Used Firefox and it worked! Dunno what happened with google chrome...

LP

03/04/2012: Finished chapter 84 for APFU and FF keeps logging me out when I click on the submit documents link. Soooooooooo frustrating.

Ah well, maybe it's an upgrade.

I'll check on it again later.

LP

03/02/2012: Alas, I am even more busy than before - and more stressed out. But I find once I have inspiration it is much easier - and less time consuming - to knock off a chapter than when you are blocked. The plot comes to you while you are working or in the shower or simply making the trek home from work even in the later hours after a long day. But if you are blocked then nothing comes and you can't spare the time to sit there and bang your head on the keyboard until something comes - which doesn't always help btw. I also fear that you readers are short changed by my obligations as where I could do research or make the scene more detailed or think of a different way to put a mundane cliche or scene etc I don't. However, it gives me such joy to be writing again - hurts me more than it hurts you when I'm blocked as I love to write - I will try not to dwell on that too much and simply hope it gets better.

I can't thank you enough for the reviews. I'm so overwhelmed by the response to the arc that I am constantly updating this profile and my story as you can see, lol. New chapter will be worked on this weekend.

LP

02/21/2012: Hi again.

Yes, the bunnies are hopping (thank goodness). I already have the start of the next chapter (Don's angst over what he is doing. He is finding out that it's not so simple. These people love him too. I think he distrusted Kaori's words as he was a vampire but Zero was different. The way he relates is more what Don is used to...)

I was trying to hint at it in the previous chapter when Kaname learned "the trick". Ken is still there. In chapter (what was it? Dunno) when Claude realised it was Ken inside Zero, Ken said deliberately that if he left then Zero would die as he was the only spirit left to maintain the spell. He faked his leaving so Zero would "come out" - the mist in the air was all show. Claude's the only one that knows this. It's also interesting because Zero has another over-protective pureblood inside of him and doesn't know it (they all just think it's one of Zero's creepy residents that survived not realising this one is a lot more rational, restrained and selfless). Will Ken realise that Peter is his brother? I think he should have. He was probably distracted by the sexual assault on Zero's person. These Kurans, lol.

Yes, Kaori, and possibly Kane, think of Zero - if they considered that sort of thing (they take a lot for granted) as a parent and love him as a parent but one that's much closer to them and knows their tricks and personalities better than anyone. He cares about knowing that sort of thing. The pureblood parents are more superficial. (Kaname cares that they learn well, respect him and his authority (he is the strict parent) and become strong heirs - which is why Kane was a bit of a letdown. Sara cares that they are happy (to that end she spoils them) and are strong, traditional purebloods.) They adore their children in their own way but they aren't the nurturer Zero is. As such he has heavily insinuated himself into their psyche, for better or worst. They're also used to treating him delicately because they grew up knowing and treating him as a relatively fragile, old ex-human so they are used to making allowances for him and considering his feelings and wanting to protect him. His parenting style has left an impact on all of them in varying ways. For instance, Ken wanted to replace his father. Kaori enjoys the sparring but only has to think Zero's truly upset with him to be subdued. Kane thinks Zero is the only one he can trust and truly love because of his inauspicious start in life and how Zero accepted him anyway. He actually has him on a very short leash - a variant on Ken without the sexual possessiveness. If anyone mistreats him in any way he will be yanked in and the threat dispensed with... even if it is his own father. Kaori senses this about Kane but he has lived with that his entire life and accepts it.

Have I left anything out? Oh!

"A" was very kind enough to share her experience of her relationship with her father and I really appreciate her doing that as now I have a better appreciation of that aspect. She apologised the whole time she shared it and I'm considering banning people that speak/read more than one language or tell such relevant experiences of their lives from apologising profusely in my reviews because really... are you serious? I'd give my right arm to speak anything as well as you do or to appreciate a different point view, dammit...!! But I digress...

Thanks A for sharing and please don't try to cheapen something like that by calling it boring. If someone doesn't want to hear that it's their loss, okay?

Everyone else... what can I say. I was well touched by all the reviews, especially the ones that addressed the flamer. I'm not sure why she put herself through eighty-five chapters and hundreds of thousands of words before realising it was too much for her but she made me think seriously about what caused her to forget why she kept reading to chapter eighty-five in the first place. It could be I'm not developing the characters well enough. My muse and I are having a meeting about that as I speak.

But oz, L, de, ir, L332, s t, Ki, Mar, DLP, pd, WUAH, LS01, rb, NiG, A A, (), li, zj, A, Ne, A1 and all the others I can't remember right now thank you very, very much. But you know you are appreciated. Without you there wouldn't be eighty-six chapters of this story.

So now you know.

LP

02/13/2012: Another update? When it rains it pours...

I'm not getting the hostility towards poor Don. He is a victim, one. Two, he is protecting the only mother he knows and loves and empathizes with. And another thing, if someone killed my family I would be lot less subtle about retribution than Julia. And if I found out someone hurt my mother, he/she would be an instant enemy. This with my being a human with far less powerful territorial, protective and predatory instincts than (I imagine) a vampire, that hasn't spent her life on the run from a very real and present danger - said idiot that killed Mom's family. One closes ranks in such a stressful situation, form closer bonds. After all you can only trust one person. And I've never understood those Lifetime movies where the child was happy and yet goes hugging and crying over some stranger just because she gave birth to him/her twenty-five years ago. Sure, show up and claim the kid after the hard part's over. Noble! But then, the kid that doesn't care wouldn't make good TV. Now Don feels his mother is pushing him away to be with these people they'd always despised, even though they obviously love each other, simply because he was born a vampire... I don't know about you but I feel sorry for the kid.

Anyway (stop ranting, LP!), I blame myself as I should make this clearer in the story. I will try harder. Somehow... (shakes muse violently and narrowly avoids the bite).

LP

02/12/2012: Wow! Haven't written here in a while! Haven't even wished you all a happy new year! Sorry. All the best wishes for the year to you and yours.

I also forgot to thank all the lovely people who keep me going with their reviews in the last couple of chapters of APFU. I don't beg for them anymore because I do find it hard to reply AND write with my schedule - and I found it had become a bar to writing the story when I worried about replying which made no sense since I'm sure you'd prefer the story and that's enough work in itself - so I understand if people don't bother. Which make it even more cool when these gorgeous people do! I hate to name names because I always forget someone vital, but even so, you know who you are and everyone else should too who have tried to read this extremely long, rambling, AU, OC story on the strength of the very generous reviews you all have written over the four years of the story - yes four - of its existence. (Is that a record yet? For fanfiction, I mean. I know about Inuyasha, lol.)

Thank you all too for reading thus far. I do hope to keep all of you entertained for yet another year.

LP

10/02/2011: Still working on next installment of APFU. Maybe the coming weekend.

LP

09/04/2011: My mind keeps going in so many directions! I thought I had settled on a plot but then... I get distracted but a late surge. LOL.

I hear you pd (I think you mean Kane). I would love to do something with Kane. But... *sigh*. *Hits head to wall then realises belatedly it doesn't help*.

Thanks for the reviews on the last chapter of APFU! L - if only I could write so I can continue to get your glowing reviews that make me feel like I am curing cancer or something. Ty! A1 and pd - Is it Stockholme's Syndrome? He never knew anyone else to make the transition from and all she's ever done was be his mother. They love each other. Anyway...

DLP, ir, L01, A-s, B a and s t: Thanks!

Alright, enough ranting. Thanks for listening.

LP

08/21/2011: Argh!! Still trying with APFU 75.

LP

07/24/2011: Hello. It's me again. I realise I haven't had anything to do with writing on this site in a looong time - I am currently trying to finish an Mpreg over on AO3 that I won't bother you guys with (some people may feel about Zero having a uterus the same way I feel about Kagome (Inuyasha) having a dick. *Shudders*). I haven't been able to think of anything inspiring to write in APFU. My muse is on strike or something. Also what's disheartening is that I feel like I am repeating myself. The same themes over and over. I feel like nothing new is coming out. I think this is causing stage fright as well. *sigh*

Enough about me.

I also wanted to give Blackened Wing her due credit for the scene in TS36 when Kaname showed Yuuki his claws. I remember reading a scene like that in one of her stories - I don't recall which now - and I remember thinking it was so cute and wishing I had thought of it. So as I was reading TS this weekend - working on a Zero/Kaname/Ichiru one-shot that may not see the light of day *sighs theatrically again* - I remembered where I got that from and couldn't be bothered to find the chapter and repost it with the shout out. So here it is! Thank you for the rip-o... I mean inspiration!

LP

02/21/2011: Hi!

I'm still alive. I have started APFU 73 and will finish it sometime this week so look out for that. I will try to update/finish TS this next weekend - God, RL is murder - then I can go at APFU full tilt, which would be simpler.

Thanks for all the lovely encouraging reviews and readers! You know who you are.

Thanks.

LP

01/01/2011: HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Have finally tucked into TS 36, ignoring the plots bunnies for APFU for the time being. I'm beset by two plot directions anyway in the latter so I need to decide. I know it looks easy but it is hard figuring out the dynamics of such a situation. Before I had all my Mills and Boone romance novels, fanfic and The Fugitive to be inspired by. Here is something new. And when I had started writing IRL I had a job that was pretty much a no-brainer. Now as the challenges increase there is less time to really relax, think and then get... "Hey, that would be GREAT!!!" That brain power is spent figuring out the next step in whatever I am working on or I am so stressed I can't relax. I'm not whining, I'm merely explaining that I'm human and I feel just as disappointed when I can't post something every weekend too.

But I do promise to "finish" all my stories or arcs eventually.

All the best for the year!

LP

12/16/2010: Sorry about the extra alert for chap 75 of APFU. I saw that I hadn't changed the chapter number and I didn't know how else to correct it.

LP

12/12/2010: APFU chapter 71 is in its final tweak stages. After I sleep on it and read it through again I will post if I still like it. Maybe Monday night. Thank you for your patience. I have an idea for TS as well. Maybe this coming weekend?

LP

10/29/2010: No stories this weekend or for a while. The hurricane we just had knocked out my computer. I am distraught to say the least. No way I can sort it out quickly. Ah well, at least my family and me are fine.

Later.

LP

10/24/2010: Hello!

Sorry for the lack of updates. I've been trying to see if I can do a Sci-Fi, AU, Mpreg story over on AO3 so I won't bother my subscribers with my whimsy - when you get an idea in mind the best thing is to write it down - and have been neglecting my other stories. I do plan to update APFU this weekend and TS the following weekend. Thanks for your patience!

J-J - thanks for the lovely review you gave APFU! Are you really only reading K/Z in that context? What about the below authors? I just read a lovely series of fics by NO the other day that totally knocked my socks off. I mean, now I know what kissing is for! Yum... Kei's "mommy" will not be a lame character. She is intelligent, driven, highly skilled, prone to attacks of conscience but still slightly unhinged. She won't be dull. I hope...

LP

09/25/2010: Hi!

Sorry for the lack of updates. I've been very busy with a new job - same profession just different diggs - and haven't been able to get my muse to concentrate. I am also very anxious to do the next few chapters of either story right... I mean the depth of emotion (and story) needed for the Kaname's confrontation with his uncle (TS) and how I want Kei relationship with his "Mommy" to go (APFU). Grr, it's complicated. But I want it to be complicated. My ten or so readers demand it. ;) (Still compares herself to Yen, BW, SGK, LeaNic, C-S etc just to torture herself.)

Also, I've been battling these other plot bunnies this other muse has shown up and hit me over the head with - nature abhors a vacuum. Right now... well... you'll see. It is fairly ambitious for me as I am thinking of actually trying to set this story at the Academy - normally I'm too lazy to do so (too much detail and characters to remember) - but it will be quite AU (sorry canon freaks). I won't give out the plot yet because I wouldn't have much of a readership if I didn't suck unsuspecting people into a story they wouldn't be otherwise reading... but it will have a bit of everything (including - heaven help me - het (*wonders if I remember where to put what*) and still rated "M" as I can't be bothered to censure myself anymore. Sooo... see ya then! Not right now though, I have to rush off to work...

LP

09/14/2010: Sorry about the below. I was having a hissy fit. I'll be back after the break.

09/12/2010: Hi.

I'm sitting here writing TS 34 and sketching out APFU and hating everything I've done and even feel like deleting all my stories because I'm sure they're third rate... which may be true but still I should stop and come back in a week just in case... Thanks for the the encouragement and reviews for all the stories but especially TA! Loved that little gem! Until today...

Okay, I'm going to back away from the computer now before I do something I'll regret. See you next weekend.

LP

08/15/2010: I appreciate all the encouragement in the reviews! However this weekend I am floored with the flu. I had no idea it could be this bad. I spent last three days begging my sister to kill me. I seriously have a new appreciation for euthanasia and I only had a cold!

All this to say that I don't feel sexy or creative this weekend. I can only hope I survive and next weekend I'll make it up to you.

Later!

LP

08/04/2010: You all got quite a treat this long weekend (four days of weekend, Kadooment Day and Emancipation Day in Barbados)! So many chapters! But it is back to work from today. Maybe this weekend I'll update again. So many things swimming around in my head!

Thank you for all the reviews, comments, pm's etc. It is great knowing your hard work is appreciated!

If people want to, they can send me reviews in other languages if you believe you aren't good enough with English to send one - I don't understand reading my stuff and saying that, what with the words I like to throw in in odd places. However, that's what google translate is for! (Well, and translating websites etc. lol). Just don't expect me to reply in said language. But if I do, and the message has two meanings and one of them insults you or your mother or requires you pull strange objects out of your ass... etc, I meant the other meaning, okay?

07/11/2010: Nothing this weekend. Was getting my heart broken by football. But I've decided on a direction for APFU so maybe next weekend...

LP

07/09/2010: Hello everyone! B'day coming up soon and I feel so old. *sigh* Okay, let's not talk about that...

I have not abandoned APFU. I am very grateful for the comments and reviews to the story and the requests that I continue but I find I cannot multi-task very well. I was hoping since one muse is actually awake and working I would concentrate on that story (TS) and leave the other (APFU) for now.

Of course, it doesn't help when you find the storyline you got excited about isn't working... *long stupse*

I'll try to wake up the APFU muse this weekend BUT NO PROMISES, lotm, MD, fuj, i-t-b and hds. She bites...

LP

06/27/2010: Oh the horror! No stats! Well this sucks! I've been robbed of one of the few joys I have...! GRRR!!!

APFU - still working on it.

06/19/2010: Just letting you know I am still here. Time is not on my side. Still trying to update though.

LP

06/06/2010: It's June. I'm getting so old and the hurricanes are coming.

Chapter 30 of TS posted. Hope you like it. I suppose the kidnap arch will be resolved one way of or the other next chapter and then I think the story will "end" before Chapter 40 reaches us - just giving hope to those who think I'll go on forever.

I have a plot for APFU but it's emotionally demanding. Some may already suspect what it is. I want it to ring true so badly I am afraid to write it. Makes sense, I know... But it is fascinating (to me) which is the important thing. I'll try laying it out this week and maybe something may arrive before the weekend.

LP

05/07/2010: Hello!

It's May already! Woah!! I bet I am losing readers for TS in droves...

These days have been hectic me. Between work (very demanding), tiling the house (SO much stress) and generally being unable to focus on the storyline has got me on pause. This weekend will be out for sure - my room is next to be tiled - but I will try to see if I can spend the time figuring out the next chapter. I won't promise anything during the week - most likely I will be having a nervous breakdown from my ridiculous schedule instead - but we'll see.

04/18/2010: Hello all.

I am very stressed out about work and as a consequence I haven't been able to consider the next chapters of my stories. I am essentially blocked. I apologise for this.

04/07/2010: Hi.

This is to say that I am still considering the next chapters of APFU and TS. Your patience is greatly appreciated.

L - You hit the nail on the head. These kids shouldn't accept Kaname. But why do they? Why do you? The answer to that question is crucial and lies in all of us that are still rooting for this strange family. Part of us - the ones who care as I know some people are only about the two canon males getting it on, not that there is anything wrong with that ;P - know that Kaname isn't a "monster" by a whole lot of choice. This is what he was born to be. This is his nature, his morality - I always come back to this - and his survival. He is not exactly like a depraved serial killer - who don't need to kill, not really. If you ask him to stop... he'd not only die, he wouldn't be Kaname. And the point of the tale is the gift of unconditional love. To him as well as to the human family.

But will love keep them together? As you say: he frigging tortures and eats people. We'll see...

03/29/2010: Hi everyone!

I wanted to put a few clarifications up because other people may be curious and because some reviewers may grow old before I reply - I'm sorry.

The arm - I'll clarify the significance of the arm in the next chapter but it doesn't belong to anyone in the story.

Ages - Zero and Ichiru are a twin and are currently sixteen years old - Zero's older by about a minute or so (makes all the difference to a twin apparently) - Yuuki was eight and is now nine years-old and Kaname... Lord knows... about five hundred I think. Yes, years.

The hallway of Ancestors - I don't think Kaname hates his ancestry. He hates that Zero may hate his ancestry and by extension him. He is well aware of the fact he is carrying on a very unlikely relationship with three humans that may find what he and his ancestors got up to very appalling. So he tries to hide it with varying degrees of success (which I will leave for you to judge as to whether or not that is a healthy decision on his part.) And he is right; there is nothing about his ancestors ZERO or his siblings should admire - unless they become serial killers with sadistic tendencies.

Shizuka - I had hoped to imply that Kaname had caught her and her boyfriend soon after they were out of sight and had... imobilised them effectively. To the extent that they would be out all day in the sun until he went back for them, like Ichiru would have been left to do by them.

Vampire - I've decided that Zero, or anyone, will only become a vampire when they are bitten by a pureblood, if it happens. ;)

I want to also say that the story may get a bit more disturbing now we are getting to who Kaname really is. I apologise to those of you that came on board when it was a cute western about three kids and a vampire. But it is necessary to explore this aspect and see if their love - by that I mean Kaname and his new family - can endure against the odds and I don't like to hold back or censor myself (I am too lazy for that).

That's all I can remember off the top of my head. If I get any more questions I'll add on.

Thanks!

LP

03/14/2010: Hello.

Here's the thing: I am suffering a pretty bad case of writer's block. I really wanted to update this weekend but the ideas won't come - or come and I can't relate them to the progress of the story. I am writing this after staring at this blank page for an hour. I have told people before that "complained" about the cliffies that when I get stuck I end a chapter. Well, I am still at a loss. I do intend to finish TS and continue APFU so don't be bothered about that. It will just take a little longer to figure myself out of the corner I have barricaded myself into.

Sorry...

LP

02/21/2010: Sorry for the lack of updates. I've been swamped with work and... well... a bit stuck on both counts. It is also a little weird trying to remember the kinder, gentler Kaname (TS) when I have to think of cold, selfish Kaname (APFU). I wonder if one is contaminating the other. But I am stuck other than that.

I have been getting loads of suggestions and am trying to work with them but please be patient with me. Perhaps if I get a moment next weekend...

LP

02/16/2010: Hello!

K-o - Thanks for your comments and review! I will treat each future comment/review with the respect they deserve whenever they arrive. Thanks! I understand your feelings. I enjoy torturing my readers as much as the characters themselves. Angst!! However, I enjoy plotting that makes you think and feel. There is no right answer. Maybe they all should be hated. Or loved. Or dismissed. Or neither! I only hope that you enjoy the experience!

GG - Though I am flattered you read ALL my stories and left a review at chapter 68 of APFU, please don't feel you have to change me. There are so many authors on who don't have anything wrong with them. Choose one. Thank you for your review!

LP

02/13/2010: Hi!

I have updated APFU. I am hoping to start to write for it more regularly. I want to thank whoever it was that said they wanted to see Zero get his own - can't remember who and I would have to look through the reviews or messages and I am lazy - but that is what got me thinking about the theme for chapter 65. Of course, what happens from now on is still up to my muse who has shot me a nasty look as I keep prodding her with a stick and rolled over to get out of reach. Well... at least she is waking up...

01/31/2010: Say goodbye to January 2010! I can't believe how time flies!

bl - Thank you for the reviews. I realize I do repeat myself as well. My favourite themes always come out because... well... they are my favourite... However, I stand by my characterization of Kaname because I believe absolute power in his environment would engender quite a bit of excess and corruption. He would soon realise no-one can stop him from doing very much and would indulge his whims and pleasures. That's my view anyway. But I also wish to point out that it is all the more sweeter that Kaname can have it all and still wished to stay at the very simple ranch and be selfless for a change. This Kaname is different. His primary concern is his new family and what they think of him.

Harems? You are jumping ahead of me there. Just see where it goes.

I did think of Zero's getting used to the venom... I'm not sure I want such a neat conclusion to the problem - you must know about my addiction to angst by now. Besides, that would mess up other consequences I may want later on... My muse will figure it out. Thank you for the suggestion!

LP

01/20/2010: Whoa!! So many complaints about how meek Zero is getting! (...Alright, two comments.) But if you remember, Kaname was rather submissive himself when he was at the ranch, which is definitely OOC. This is because - in my estimation - he was in their world and despite his need to take everything over, learned to be more accepting, tolerant and his love for them made him a bit of a pushover. I think I am doing the same thing in Zero's case. He is now part of Kaname's world. He is seeing many wondrous things including the existence of more than one vampire and he is tagging along with someone, who only a few years ago, would have been the most dangerous person he could have come across. Kaname was the most successful purveyor of all things vampire hence his title of "Prince" - he still is, save for four or five humans he'd met after a very traumatic experience that probably has driven him insane (I mean, he's attached himself to these children in a way a vampire of his caliber would find very unnatural and ridiculous.) All this to explain that Zero understands what his role is. He understands and loves Kaname as he is and respects that he is in dangerous territory and doesn't want to embarrass him or jeopardize their getting back their family safely by shedding doubt on Kaname's integrity as prince or dying needlessly. Kaname is family and a lover. One (tries to) trusts family and lovers. Anyway, he thinks it is only for a few days then he'll be back on the ranch again. Personally, if I were Zero, I'd play along too if the head shark told me to stay close and don't shake blood in the water. There are so many of those other sharks...

Still, I'll reread with this much appreciated criticism in mind and try to keep Zero IC.

Or maybe (the two of) you are afraid Zero will suddenly become docile and feminine and it will be an Mpreg story with Zero birthing in 3 months and becoming hormonal and baking cookies and saying "Yes, Dear" over the knitting... Oh no! I've talked myself into it! Bad Muse! Bad!

LP

MOVED TO FORUM (TOO LONG)*

08-02-2008: Review replies are up in forum for APFU. Thanks you all again for your patience.

08-02-08: Hi. I wanted to say to ANON ("Tenderness") that Kaname doesn't pay for sex. He is one of few pure-bloods. He is much sought after (like groupies) and is fulfilling a natural drive. I know famous, gorgeous people do pay for sex but they are not one of the last men on this earth. I had to say that. I couldn't bear to not rebut that point. Also men operate differently - so I am told. They can have sex and see it as just an urge and pleasure and then make love and mean it. Kaname has sex with these women, but he makes love to Zero. The difference? He cares about Zero's pleasure and cuddles Zero afterwards... I will make that clearer in the story. Somehow...

I see your point about the imagery and onomatopoeia (words when pronounced sound the same way the sounds are made in real life e.g. "poof!!") - just don't take my suspension points away from me! I am a lazy writer. I rave over everyone else that does the imagery and detailed description and do the opposite myself.

Shout Out:

To all you very supportive people who bother to review. Thanks!

Lenko - Thanks!!

irmina - Thank you.

To nbs: Thanks for reviewing even if I drive you crazy sometimes. I really appreciate your kind words when I most need them. Thanks!

To ZD: I can't believe I haven't put something permanent here just for you until now. To you, who always review and make all the writers feel truly special for making the effort, Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. And thank you for the 200 review on APFU and the first on the new one TK - I was so nervous until you said it was good. Bless you.

To oz: Thank you very much for your continuing support. It is much appreciated!

To aoh: Thank you very much as well. I hope I can keep your interest well into the future.

To BW: I am still blushing. I am very touched by your words in the review. Thank you very much!

Sister swayed by my tears and allows me regular access to her laptop - she lives elsewhere. This one is for her. YAAAYYYYY SIS!!

To SG who immediately puts me at ease when I am so nervous about the reception of a chapter. Thanks!

To MPE who kept me on my "realistic" toes. Thanks! - You want blood from a stone MPE. Zero/Yuuki doesn't quite inspire me the same way - if you get what I'm saying. I am keeping your request in mind though.

Finally got a review for "Reunion". And it was good! Yayyy!! So happy. Thanks SP.

Name:

lightpathetic - but you can call me LP.

Stories:

They are mostly - ok nearly all - VK fanfiction. Those two - Kaname and Zero - have really stolen my imagination. Well, when my imagination wants to be stolen. I am also dying to do something with Berserk - Griffith/Gutts - but a plot escapes me. Maybe, someday. Griffith is too yummy. I love strong, intelligent men.

I love the one story I did from BOTI but it would be simply too much research to continue it. Complete fiction and the future is one thing - anything goes - but history is its own headache... I'll probably have someone listening to the radio in the shower and it will go downhill from there. But I won't say never. I may get the inspiration to continue. Thank you to those of you who read and reviewed.

Story 1 - A Strange Relationship -- Would you believe this was going to stay a one-shot? Finished at chapter 18. Kaname/Zero!

Story 2 - Reunion -- Poor neglected story. At least I thought it was funny...

Story 3 - Strange AU -- Finished at Part V. Hope you all like it. Just superimpose it on what was the final scene in the the original story and there you have your happy ending.

Story 4 - Love Is Enough -- Third in the series. That is if you accept the alternative ending.

Story 5 - Mature Kink -- Finished at MK VII. Whew! I have to say that was the hardest K/Z fanfic yet. Don't forget: suggestions for improvements always welcome.

Story 6 - Sacrifices - I know but I thought it was interesting...

Story 7 - A Place For Us - Envisaged as a very long, dramatic piece offering a glimpse into Zero's life with the Kurans - Hopefully it will remain interesting to you all. If not, tell me please! I will try to think of something fresh meanwhile...

Story 8 - The Kindness -- An answer to a fan's request that intrigued me. I know, I was thinking about it for weeks and that is all I came up with, but it was hard, especially with writing lemon. Anyway I hope it is what you wanted!

Story 9 - Tenderness -- Kaname is very much in love with Zero and it shows.

Story 10 - ASR chapter 15 Revisited -- Terrible title but it says what it means.

Story 11 - Pure Blood -- It's evolving into a romance...

Story 12 - Moonlight -- Because I missed Ken so much, an excerpt from their life together.

Story 13 - Doubt -- An excuse for some threesome smut with Yuuki, Kaname and Zero. Blame Blackened Wing's teasing ending for FHM. Don't do it to yourself if it's not your thing.

Story 14 - The Stranger -- A love story and a story about love, not necessary on that order...

Cool pairings:

Kaname/Zero (Vampire Knight), Anotsu/Rin (Blade of the Immortal), Gutts/Griffith (Berserk)

Confessions (not yet exhaustive):

- I love to write. Currently it is the sum total of my social life.

- Can't get past that fire-ball mummies stage in Lara Croft - Angel of Darkness and feel like a loser.

- Am a terrible procrastinator. No deadlines, no hope.

- I am Lazy, Lazy, Lazy - hence my writing isn't the most detailed. Too much trouble to wax lyrical about the sunset or the floppy, silky, emotionally compelling texture of a characters hair. I do apologise... Just use your imaginations.

-Finished my first multi-chapter. Felt good!

-"A Strange Relationship" was the first story I have ever written outside of secondary school assignments. I am so surprised at the result! Chapter 30 just inspired me so much. I think it was the chapter in which Kaname brought the cursed doll for Zero as a joke and I thought "Gee this boring kid actually has a sense of humour! Maybe considers Zero a friend - at least worth the trouble of teasing. Maybe there is more to him than meets the eye." And that's how it started. If it wasn't for the "cursed doll" present - not the bite because I was expecting that - there wouldn't have been this story. Funny huh.

Vampires 101:

1. There are five levels of vampire in their society: A - pure blood; B - nobles; C - normal vampires; D - ex-human; E - insane ex-human. Ex-humans are looked down upon by all the vampires in classes A-C as they are not true vampires and are made by the pure-bloods, mostly as slaves or accidentally after they were destined to be dinner. Ex-human "slaves" can be used for any purpose by the pure-bloods - for blood or other pleasurable pursuits and gender is according to whatever is the preference of the pure-blood - sexual preference, as well as certain interests, the mood of the pure-blood, boredom etc. It is perfectly normal in their society for pure-bloods to have such "subjugated" ex-human vampires that exist entirely for pleasure/blood. The ex-humans are like pets and are seen as such. The trouble occurs where an A-C class vampire falls for or maintains a "serious" relationship with an ex-human vampire. It is completely frowned upon and discouraged.

For vampires as long as something is pleasurable it will be done - so gender is not an issue. However it will be if an A-B class vampire is in a same sex relationship as the family would normally expect heirs. There would be familial/social pressure to conform to hetero-sexual relationships, maybe having the affair, with an equal, quietly on the side.

2. (My, this is late in coming S.G. Anyway here goes.) I have to admit that I envisioned Kaname as being deliberately obtuse when he talked about getting Zero children. They say love is blind and he wanted to be blind to the fact that just any child won't do. I also meant it to be slightly (? okay very) disturbing given Kaname's determination to get what he wants. So it was conceivable that our main vampire may have kidnapped, adopted, impregnated a slave, bought one, or had a surrogate to get any baby. In other words he would have been relentless and he would have been effective, knowing him as we do ( -- not the royal we S.G. lol), just to please Zero. But hey, don't hate him yet. It was during a "possessive" rant after all. We are all irrational during those...

Inconsolable:

I know H. I love Zero too, but realistically I feel he would lose, a lot, to Kaname's autocratic and powerful nature. At least he is getting (some) explanations for why Kaname chooses to do as he does - this definitely shows his high regard for Zero.

To MPE: I hear you girl! I will try for more Yuuki. But you must appreciate that I envisioned this as a short Shonen-ai piece with Kaname/Zero - the two that really hold my heart (yummy) - and Yuuki is essentially in the way of that! LOL. Anyway, it is true that they are both really in love with her - though Kaname, poor guy, doesn't really know what to think anymore with this blood-bond thing.

OOPPS!! Thanks AP. I reread and realised that the grammar was not cool in many parts of the chapters. I do get so enthused that I miss quite a bit. But some are just the flow of words in my head. So I begin sentences with conjunctions and throw punctuation and suspension points (ellipses) EVERYWHERE (lol) - kids don't try this at home. I will re-up...soon (see procrastination confession above).

8/06/2012: My Human K/Z Mpreg Story (AU) - http:///works/127689?view_full_work=true