um, yeah. Having gotten over my stage of angsty 'shoot-me-i'm-old'... well... angst, I have changed my name. Yes, I liked the name 'falmalinnar' quite a lot, but I was rereading the Waste Land, and I decided that I wanted to change my name to 'hyacinth-girl', but it was sadly taken, which is reallly odd since when i ran the word 'hyacinth' through search for author's pen-names, there WAS no hyacinth-girl, or derivative thereof. So in complete and utter desperation i decided that it was time to experiment with numbers replacing letters. Normally I disapprove of such utter blasphemy (think a breathless, girly voice, even though I have to be the most masculine out of my friends) but HELLO! I AM DESPERATE. I really, REALLY wanted that name, so here we have it: hyacinth-9irl. Just pretend that's a g, ok? I will try at random intervals to nick that name, though. see y'all around. IT IS NOW OFFICIAL.

I AM DECREPIT. SHOOT ME BEFORE I DELIQUESCE IN MY SESQUEPIDALIAN ULTRACREPIDARIAN MISERY.

on the bright side, I received a LOTR visual companion, and an oscar the grouch tshirt from my best friend, with words that are highly emblematic of my personality: emblazoned across the left side is the word SCRAM. yup. That's me all over. Grumpy green thing that lives in a dustbin.

Yeah. Hi. I'm 16. I am a fanatical obsessive psycho. I live in Australia- none of your business where, so don't ask- and my current obsessions are:

-cherry-flavored chupa chups. (I swear they exist)
-mangoes.
-eating in general
-LOTR - however, I will never write a LOTR fanfic- Tolkien and Jackson did so good on those you can't expand. plus, there are too many people writing them already
- Princess Bride - again, who could write a fanfic when you have Goldman coming up with quotes like 'Life is pain, highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.' and Fezzik's immortal book quote 'I don't know why everyone thinks I'm so stupid. Just because i drool when i get excited-" and Vizzini's response: "The reason why everyone thinks you're so stupid is you ARE so stupid. The drooling has nothing to do with it." I actually watched neko no ongaeshi in english just so I could hear him... and yell 'WESTLEY!" every time. Which drove my sister mad, because in the movie he's playing a cat called Baron Humbert von Gikkingen. Yes, I know the name is disgusting. Or maybe that's just the lolita-esque connotations implied by the name 'Humbert', but 'Westley' is a pretty cool name. Plus, Cary Elwes has a really nice voice. Kind of 'light romantic comedy lead' voice. Expressive, and not overly deep.
-HORNBLOWER. I love Hornblower muchly. But I prefer the tv series to the books- mostly because Horatio in the books always struck me as an rigid prat who was COMPLETELY up themselves. Plus, I hate adulterers... and I love the way Horatio in the TV series is so noble and chivalrous and completely gorgeous... unlike that eejit in the books who simply happens to share the same name, especially when Movie Horatio spends the night in a chair next to Mariette. Although Archie is damn cute too.

-the hatred of: Harry Potter. Non-canon. Slash that portrays the characters as absolute... well... you know. Promiscuous... nymphomaniacs... I mean, hasn't it occurred to anyone that there is generally very little evidence to that effect? Oh, especially with Edrington slashes. Sure, the guy is supercilious, and actually very nice at heart, if unable to express that... but HELLO. THAT DOES NOT MEAN HE SLEEPS WITH ANYTHING THAT MOVES. I mean, if you check out some of the Hornblower fanfic, at least 75 of the stuff where Edrington is a main character has him... getting carnal... with either:
1) Archie. By far the most popular.
2) Horatio.
3) Pellew
4) Styles. ( I still don't get that)
5) Kitty Cobham
And so on, et al.

- HOMOPHOBES. Some people do fall in love with the other gender. DEAL WITH IT. GROW UP. READ STEPHEN FRY. and if you still can't cope, SOD THE HELL OFF.

-Grammar. People with typos irritate me beyond belief- I mean, with spellcheck on computers these days THERE IS NO EXCUSE for typos- and even if it's in quotation marks doesn't mean it doesn't need punctuation. And ANACHRONISMS. They most likely do not use the word 'OK' in Middle-Earth. (They certainly didn't use it in the Regency period. )

-Mary Sues/Marty Sams - Ok- NOBODY coincidentally happens to be a) Scintillatingly GORGEOUS. b) A witch who saves Gandalf from the Balrog with her extreme power. c) A beautiful singer who plays sixty trillion instruments. d) A steel-hearted warrior with a dark, shadowy, mysterious past. e) Completely charming and coincidentally causing the main characters to fall head over heels in love with them. OK? Get OVER it.

I LOVE:
- MONTY PYTHON- WOOT! dead parrot sketch all the way. Life of Brian too... those guys ROCKED. I mean, who else could have come up with the Stoning sketch? Or 'Correct Usage of the Word F'?

-BLACKADDER- blackadder forever, man. blackadder forever. British humor ROCKS as far as I'm concerned, although I found that Blackadder got better and better with each series... in my opinion Blackadder Goes Forth is the best.

-Literature. Good literature. You know, Hemingway, F. Scott Fitzgerald, I'm partial to some of the Dickens... especially Great Expectations... The Rose and the Ring, by Thackeray- that was pretty funny too. Oh, and Hinton's the Outsiders is one of my favorites... and Capote's Breakfast at Tiffany's was so good... Hepburn was the perfect Holly Golightly, doyenne of gold-diggers... although I preferred the book ending. I loved To Kill A Mockingbird- that is a classic, no holds barred. Others include: They Shoot Horses, Don't They, Aldous Huxley, Tom Stoppard, CS. Forester, and Schama's Citizens.

-Orson Scott Card. He rules, except that I don't agree with some of his stances on political issues. IE. HOMOSEXUALITY. Him and Aldous Huxley (Brave New World- How GOOD was it?) are like the pillars of my little sci-fi haven. Ender's Game is one of my top ten books. I love the Ender and the Ender's Shadow series.

ME AND MY GIRL- Best damn musical EVER. God, Stephen Fry. Bring it the hell back- and I mean the Robert Lindsay/Emma Thompson version. I wanna see Pellew tap-dance- I've already heard him sing- Or at least bring out a movie, for goodness' sake!

Oh, by the way- flames make me LAUGH. Gushing reviews bore me.