this is really good. i hope you finish it

I can't stand reading this anymore. Peeta is so OOC and it's awful. You changed Katniss because of her future knowledge, yet have expressed that everything else is canon and all changes originate from her. However Peeta isn't even Peeta, and it's just badly done. Katniss, on the other hand, is even worse. Your portrayal of her is awful. She's not relatable, her personality is not attractive, and connecting with her is impossible. Pretty much everything she does is questionable, and it actually pisses me off that she has no drive whatsoever to use the second chance granted to her in order to make the world a better place. She's weak, cold and bland. After everything she's been through, all she's suffered, a second chance would appeal to her even if it costs her all her energy. She doesn't bother to get close to Peeta at all and only approaches him at the reaping, despite the chance to have several months with him in relative happiness.

The amount of details you got wrong astounds me. For example, when Katniss is in the cabin and gets a good look at her young body for the first time, she says she's twelve. Not a couple of sentences later she says she looks either 13 or 15. THAT MAKES NO SENSE. Is she 12, 13 or 15? Nobody would ever look at themselves and say "Oh, I look either 13 or 15." They might say 13 or 14, or 14 or 15, but never 13 or 15. It sounds so stupid I actually smacked myself in the face.

Next, Haymitch was not 14 when he won the second quarter quell. He was 16. It is explicitly stated that Finnick Odair was the youngest victor ever and that he won his games at 14. How you overlooked this, I cannot begin to guess.

Speaking of victors, did you forget that it's what they're called? You continuously call them tributes, and at one point say victorious tributes. Once a tribute wins the hunger games, they are called a VICTOR, not a tribute.

There would not have been any mine workers heading to work on reaping day. It's a day off, so everybody sleeps in because they only have to be at town square by 2pm for the reaping.

Gale visits Katniss second, after her family. Why you had him visit last makes no sense.

Katniss' suggestion for Peeta's costume to change also makes no sense. They were the center of attention in canon, on everyone's radar. It was a huge success AND THEY WON. Why that would need changing in your mind has no justification in this story other than a transparent attempt to change things up, when this is a redo story that doesn't require a change in small details.

Katniss has spent years in front of cameras, however reluctantly. She has had so much practice, and she knows what's expected of her. You completely railroaded any experience she has with the public and make it seem like she needs Peeta for any social situations. She can't even stand on her own now because of the way you portrayed her. You've made it so that Katniss is the fighter and Peeta the charmer. This was never a thing, and you've made it impossible for them to be independent and strong in their own right now. I deeply dislike that you did that. Katniss was able to get an entire nation to follow her without Peeta's help when he was captured by the capitol in Mockingjay. Her true self is what draws people in and gets them to follow her. That will always remain true, and you stripped her of that like it meant nothing.

You obviously forgot that Katniss had children. The promise of a better future and to bring those children back into the world is completely absent. Katniss has no fire, no drive, no passion. I get that she's depressed, but with all the ways you could have had her react, this is one of the worst. She actually hopes before the reaping that she won't be selected, and that if she is, wants to ensure she isn't a target. What the hell is that about? Katniss feels responsible for so many things that were never her fault. She would never just sit back and sink into the shadows. With everything she knows, she could make a huge difference. She doesn't even spend the year before the 74th games preparing and training to be in them, making her body stronger and getting a game plan ready for the future she wants to build. It's pathetic, and weak. It makes for a poor story and an annoyed reader.

Lastly, the spelling and grammar is so atrocious that this story, for all its faults, is hands down horrendous to read. Every sentence has a major error in it, sometimes several. It's so bad that I want to pull my hair out. With the potential for this story, it is shameful that you did such a bad job at simply spelling things right. Do you not have spellcheck? Because most of your errors would have easily been picked up by it. Easily. It works against you entirely in trying to entice readers to read your work. It sounds like English isn't even your first OR second language. And if English is your first language, then it's downright embarrassing. I won't begin to describe the thousands of mistakes you've made concerning this. Read your story aloud to yourself and you'll know right away. This story could never be seen as great primarily because of that, regardless of opinion concerning your story content.

Anyways, I hope you will take my criticisms into account and not be too offended by my vented frustrations. Thank you.

I deeply dislike your portrayal of District 12 and the way that the peacekeepers behave. If Katniss was sent back to change canon, then this is all wrong. Katniss was very clear in the original works that things were pretty lax in her district, and that peacekeepers didn't give out harsh punishments like whippings because the mayor didn't have a taste for it. Attendance at school was also very lax, and a random kid from the Seam missing for a day or two would most definitely not attract the attention of the authorities. The absolute terror Katniss, Prim and Mrs. Everdeen were displaying, as well as the description of how the neighbours would act is way overdone. Katniss NEVER described District 12 like that, and I'm so incredibly disappointed that you decided to diverge from canon to make things seem worse than it is. I truly feel like you weakened your story by doing this. Especially since it diminishes the harsh contrast of the changes made to the district after Katniss' and Peeta's Victory Tour in Catching Fire. I wish you hadn't embellished the presence of the Capitol's forces in District 12 in your story. Such a disappointment.

So far this story is great, but the lack of a beta makes it very difficult to read. I appreciate the warning, but considering the ridiculous amount of spelling, grammar and syntax errors, I'm really dismayed that you didn't bother to get a beta reader. It would significantly improve your story and attract more readers. And it is a good story, but the mistakes in almost every sentence is very frustrating.

Is she gonna tell Peeta?

This story is too good for the reviews to be so little

I’m so so very happy that you updated! Thank you so much! As always your update warmed my heart. Can’t wait for another surprise update!

Thank you for updating!

Noooooo... it ended. Very good story. I'm really enjoying it. Please continue as I'm dying to see the whole Gale love triangle play out

YES! Too bad you can't change the font sizes. My elation would take up an entire page. I love this story and am so happy to see an update. Thank you for sharing!

This is amazing! I hate that it's 1 and 3/4 of a year since the last update. I need MORE! Oh my god! It almost hurts. I hope you continue. This story is amazing!

Honestly, I don't like that Katniss barely made it in the arena. That makes no sense whatsoever. She has decades of experience on them.

I read this story all in one sitting! I love it. Normally I can’t tolerate stories that have no beta, but your's is so good it actually doesn’t bother me. If English is not your first language then I am a actually really impressed with how well you have written it. Please, please will you consider updating it? This storyline is unique (which is rare) and I really want to follow it further. Katniss has a real shot at changing things, now that she has an adult mind and is not easily manipulated this time. Plus, she has added insight. She might not be able to stop a war, but she might stop Peeta from being hijacked and Prim and Finnick from dying! I anxiously await the next installment!

Interesting

God
I so want to know what happen next.