OMG I honestly wanted to cry this is the best fanfic i have ever read. im a big anime fan. You are absolutely amazing. does that mean you won't write on here again cause that's a shame i only found u here. WOW could you write one about diabolical lovers yui and ayato. If you ever read this. I wanna cry right now this story is the best no kidding. Thank u sooo much. Bye

PS have you ever written one about kichou wa maid sama

Awe! Cant wait until Chihro chew him out for his unwillingness... not that she wouldnt understand.

Well isn't someone throwing a temper tantrum!

At first I wasn't sure if I wanted to read this... but it's turning out so amazing! I'm excited to see where you are going to take it and excited about the length as well. I'm so happy that you are taking your time to set up the story so beautifully!

This story

I just realised that Fujisan is Mount Fuji :3

A little rushed and confusing, but surely a nice story!

This was such a beautiful chapter! I love this story so much so far :D

I loved the imagery of this story and her "easy to follow" writing style. Her character developments were awesome, Kitsune and Akuma really stood out as unique. Swansae did a wonderful job on this story.

However I have to agree with her on the "world building." As she said the role of the dragon king could be played up. As well the war could be expanded on, it was won to easily, without much struggle or action. A slightly stronger military/political tone to the story will give it much more depth, while also pushing it to greater lengths.

I liked how you took material from both drafts (mainly the second, as that seems to be the basis of this one) and made further clarifications and built on existing characters. Overall I think this story was a success and I look forward to seeing where you go in the sequel.

I loved the use of imagery and description in this story. Character interplay was also very well done, believable, and it was amazing watching Fujisan's arc unfold. I was taken by surprise by Kitsune as well and must applaud the part that she plays in this tale. Haku was another example of a well done character, and although he had his moments (as everyone does) I was very impressed with how he eventually overcame his "spiritual disability" and was more fully reborn, and Chihiro's part in it all. Chihiro was also believable, which I was very glad to see. When I was more active in the fanfiction genre a weakened version of Chihiro was a norm that I worked very hard to stay away from in my own writing. Swansae kept her both strong and believable.

I will be reading this for the Trotsdale and ASA/Catfort Libraries in Second Life for the patron there that go to listen to stories and finds. I'd also like to record this and post it on my Youtube channel linking back to this story in the way that Illya Leonov does with the My Little Pony fanfictions that he finds. I will also be reading my way through the sequel.

I say post as you go. (Extra feedback for you that way too!) :)

I would post it as you go and let the reader's decide to read it or wait until it says complete :)

This was a good story.

VOTE! post as you go !