nice :)

:D

I am excited to read what happens next. Love it so far!

I'm not sure what the idea for the story is. The story isn't leading me in a direction that would be much different from canon. There is potential for lots of changes, but I don't see them coming about. Your grammar isn't terrible, and the way you describe things are alright. However, what's lacking is your sentence structure. You have a lot of run-on sentences as well as commas and quotations marks in places I don't understand. Feel free to PM me and I can work most of these things out. I also recommend making longer chapters. But if you're doing what I did, and testing to see if people like your idea, that's totally ok.