I love how you've started this with a quote from Mama Curtis herself through Darry! "he was born into this world upside down, born in the breech position, and hadn't the desire to ever right this stance"- oh my goodness, this is such a mom observation, I love it! It's a great way to connect so many dots with their family dynamic and give us a look at young Soda. I can so see him as a little kiddo waltzing around getting into all kinds of mischief and always marching to the beat of his own drum. And I think you capture how that kind of personality would grow and adapt into an adult, especially as an adult who's survived some pretty gnarly stuff from the war.

I think the way you show your post-war Soda as malleable is absolutely genius, something I never really picked up on. It's so perfect to see what Soda looks like after war through the eyes of his brothers instead of from his own POV, I think. Pony and Darry certainly see things about him that he probably doesn't see in himself, but through no fault of their own, they're missing a lot of what's really going on inside of Soda. And as the audience, the only reason we know that is because of the Trip, I love that subtlety!

"he stays up most of the night and sleeps until afternoon"

"he keeps nothing in"/"the ugliness gets tucked in to be dealt with later"

First off, I love how Darry notices these differences in behavior and notes them as strange, but also recognizes how now his own role in Soda's life is different. Their lives are not one in the same as they used to be, and I appreciate Darry for trying to respect Soda's own method of coping, knowing too that he's not really the big brother inthe same way he was before. Of course, we learn a little later that it's much more than just minor little quirks he's developed, no he's got some real demons and is going to need help in overcoming them... or TRY to overcome them at least.

And again, Darry who sees things as fact, sees Soda as Soda wants to be seen at this point (and that's not a jab to Darry, Soda's doing a good job of hiding it from them). It makes me appreciate Darry's responsiveness in the Trip more when they sort of snap out of this reverie and are forced to see what's really going on.

I love the POV switch, again, you write like you actually are these boys telling it themselves. Darry expresses himself differently than Pony, uses different words, notices different things, deals with all this differently and you convey that all so beautifully. I love too how this piece gives us a little throwback to the times Darry and Pony really needed and relied on each other while Soda was gone, and how their bond has stayed strong even with him back. (Buckle up, boys, you're going to need each other even more here in a bit!)

Your post-war Soda has so much depth to him, and I am so in love with how you show that in so many different ways. How change occurs in the light of such horrific events, but those changes come from a Soda that is still very well rooted in who he was as a kid. I think his trauma distorts how he sees himself a little bit, but he's still so very much Sodapop even in those darker moments (like we were discussing with Burning Man, he puts out the cigarette on bare skin, but ONLY after he's heartbroken that the guy died). This is one of the most beautiful lines I've ever read "I see every piece of Soda, just put back together in a different way, like some intriguing mosaic" Wow, that is so well put, and it gives me chills! It really makes you wonder how much people actually change, or if certain happenings just accentuate part of yourself that were there all along- and I love how you aren't afraid to explore that with Soda, good and not so good, because as we have said before, a lot of these characteristics that make him a great brother/greaser/what have you, are some of the same characteristics that feed negatively into him through things like addiction. He's his own person, he's a good fighter, he's loyal, he's sweet- he still acts off of those parts of him even in the madness of war and in his return. So while war has certainly changed how we see Soda, I just love how you are able to connect him as a kid and an adult to show how he's always still very much who he was before, just pieced together a little differently.

Also, I love your physical descriptions here (no bare feet this time ;) ) but he's got this wild hair and sort of hippie look about him now, which contrast SO much to what you think of when you think of a what a soldier should look like. Magnifico! Soda was obvious a skilled soldier, but it's not his main identity (thank God). "This ain't no look, this is just me right now"- gah, so much said in such a short quote.

Oh, and I can't forget about that extra clue you give us as Soda marks that map full of X's trying to keep track of his best buddy. This selective obsessive behavior is rooted so well in trauma and how it manifests itself. The fact that he scrubs the grout in the bathroom, but doesn't tame his hair? Phew. Genius.

Pony's POV here is what gives me chills though, that undying love for Soda, how he holds his dog tags under his shirt and still struggles with losing Soda even though he's back. Pony is a sensitive sweetheart, and I love him so much for it.

Oh and I just loved this line-"but normal was always just out of our grasp, never meant for us, and I've given up normal" that just about says it all about the kind of life these boys were meant to live, doesn't it?

Anyways... this is such a perfect look into how Pony and Darry see post-war Soda, the first glimpse they have of him, before things start to make that impending downward spiral.

As always, absolutely love it!

You capture those emotions so well. Sometimes everything is fine and back to a new normal, sometimes your head goes to other places and times. Even though he came home and is physically next to you the fear that you felt was so strong and mixed with the never ending relief that he is their and your biggest hope came through makes your emotions go crazy. This was such a touching story!

Holy heck I can't unseen soda as a messianic figure now, epically the way Ponyboy wears his dog tags like a cross. Lord what an amazing story. Really incredible and the center of Soda'smiled strength as a charater I think.

I loved this. This is the first fanfiction that I have read about Soda coming back from war. Just everything about this was perfect and I loved it. I have reviewed so many of your stories I am running out of things to say because I have said everything before!

Once again, I'm captivated by your writing; you never cease to amaze me with your abilities of capturing these moments so beautifully.

I actually read this twice in one sitting, shedding a few tears along the way. It's emotionally heart-breaking, bitter-sweet, and breathtakingly written. I was honestly engrossed and captivated by every detail, every raw emotion expressed and relayed by the characters, especially the way they view Soda after he comes home.

The realism and feelings that you're able to draw from the reader is fascinating. You are truly an inspirational writer and talent when it comes to adding the realistic depth and dramatic elements that keep one wanting more. Thank you for sharing this glorious piece, and for bringing Soda home. :3

these are so A. I am LIVING for how well you tie your pieces up. Please never stop writing, even if it's just for your own eyes and no one else's. you're so talented bro.

Wow. This story was absolutely spectacular. I really like how you described Soda'S long hair and beard as resembling the Jesus painting...that's some great imagery AS WELL as symbolism because ever since he came back from Vietnam, Pony "worships" Soda. Great job!

I can't even. I love this. I freaking love YOU, Happier. :) you're so amazing!
sunny :)

I thought the structure worked well for this, with Darry, and then Pony, reflecting on their relationship with their brother and his return home, and in turn how this sheds light on the dynamic between Darry and. Pony too.

I also liked the realism you included, such as Darry recognising their relationship will have changed in light of Soda's experiences and how he can't just fall back into his 'guardian' role now Soda is home. Also nice to see a realistic portrayal of Pony where his character comes across as right for someone who is now a college student.

Interesting look at the relationships between the three brothers :)

Hmmm...never pictured Soda like this after the war, mostly because I realize Hinton said he died. Other stories of him post war that I've read have him haunted and shattered. I like your portrayal much better. He's changed, but still authentically Soda. I really enjoyed the read; many thanks!

This is really good! I believe you kept them in character, which is awesome, well, since yeah. Whatever, keep writing!

Awesome!

And you've done it once again! What a great story! You just get better and better. I love all your work on this site. I think my favorite part of this story was near the end- Pony wearing Soda's dog tags and feeling thankful. That got me- so beautifully written.
Thanks for giving me something to start my weekend off right!

This is beautiful, I love it!

This is so beautifully written! You somehow and magically manage to capture a perfect moment in time. Both Darry and Ponyboy's assessment of Soda is wonderful, but especially Ponyboy's. The mosaic reference just summed up the changes to perfectly, this line blew me away 'I see every piece of Soda, just put back together in a different way.' And when Soda sings this line to Ponyboy, 'don't let the man get ya, do what he done to me, cause he'll get ya Pony.' How true are those words!
Pony reaching for the dog tags under his own shirt and squeezing them in the palm of his hand, giving thanks, so beautiful! Pony telling Soda he somehow manages to pull off the hobo look and Soda telling him 'this ain't no look. This is just me right now.' How much I could relate to that! So true. It's like Soda's always had a inner wisdom about him, that came across in the novel to me and you've managed to capture it in such amazing clarity here. He's still Soda, despite the changes.
Darry's POV of view was also amazing! I love how you write Darry, especially how he realizes he accepts that they're never going to be normal, and that he's just glad to have all three of them under the same roof whether they're messed up or not. It's that sense of relief in still having each other and the appreciation of that which is what makes this story so heartfelt and full of warmth, and reflection that is both at the same time, painful but also beautiful. The appreciation of life, not matter what shape you are in and all three brothers realizing that.
So good!