This was great! I loved how Ben’s thought process was written

Great story :) I love it!

M1ssUnd3rst4nd1ng (I hope I got that right)

I greatly enjoyed this. It's said the carefully picked detail is worth more to the viewer (or listeners and readers in this case) than the complete itemised inventory and so it proved here.

Ben's reaction to the identity of the food was exactly what you'd expect of him, and his reactions were very human. You remembered how when you put what happens through the filter of another character they don't always get the clearest viewpoint and used it to good effect.

The use of literary terminology in his narrative voice is unusual but he was raised by Belle so it's not unbelievable (if Jay starts using the terms internal and external threats however you will be stretching it a bit). You captured the overall essence of Carlos, Jay and Evie too, despite Ben going to great effort not to talk to them directly.

One slight issue in terms of continuity was that they didn't seem to know what chocolate was when Lonnie pointed it out to them, hence her incredulous comment about chocolate-chip cookies. However, I find myself not caring — I've always believed that continuity can and should be bent slightly in the interests of storytelling and this pulls it off.

Well done.

Thisisfun

Continue this like do another one shot
Maybe longer about ben talking with jay and carlos and finding out they cant sleep because the beds are more soft than they are used to

I love this! ;)