Wow, you rewrite this from a different perspective and it is good. I like this scene in the manga because it makes Ed start thinking about Winry, but this version works too. Thanks for posting!

ooh nice, i'm guessing he completely forgot it at the end? makes sense. Very nicely written, I loved Trisha's response to Ed's apology, I think it is exactly what she would say.

fuck me okay i minus well be doing this today

I have nothing to say, except that you had me crying. Felt like I was watching the show.