A really interesting story. A little too "male wish fulfillment" for me but you've got a delightful set of interactions, solid feeling characters and a fun read going. I do hope you'll pick this back up at some point and thank you for your hard work on it so far.

I really enjoy your story, keep it up!

Great story! Please post more soon!

Very poor quality writing, I'd try to give more specific examples but it's pretty much all around bad.

Somehow this manages to be laboured and clunky while still being shallow and flimsy.
The fact that it's also all over the place, in every sense, without achieving the slightest hint of depth is almost impressive.

I especially like when you forget which tense you're using, and the slip into first person POV where you refer to Harry as "me".

It's also fairly interesting that your characters can be OOC from themselves one paragraph to the next.

On a scale from 1 banana-5 Hippos I give this: 0.5 sea cucumber

whatever happened to harry's meeting with narcissa?

awesome love the way this is turning out great work

cool

Next

great work can't wait to see how this fic develops

great start

great work