blood bonding then then Suddenly Ker-Blasting in our faces then Venom of the other wrist then Blood bonding them then to the Best Friends with Jake's blood as all of it then then to Paul's wiith Rachel's and Becca's then to the Wolves to Sam And Emily's then suddenly to more then Sharing blood with Wolves then too late did the same to mew then with they suddenly Did not age anymore then like Vampire Princess Miyu then then Pierced both suddenly popping freely then suddenly Two then then Used my Alien Rattlesnake fangs the teeth wrre straieghten then too late Cursed them with powers then the Guad found me sharing like In the CW The Vampire Diaries was world-famous but could speak in Italian but in Greek but with Vulcan tongues take carew of that who made you tell us/them then then Kidnapped with they good then Isabella tried for treason and murdser we sentence you as Sex slaves screaming then then Experimented by augmenting then suddenly became really horny was in heat gone in the Phaser was Seductive and quite alluring the NASA Bodysuit infected me with b female bee poison was driving men wild was not Human at all then then so the Brain surgeries made me a Succubus a true one good with they then what is wrong with you she is setting me on Fire Then Venomous flames blacking ouside where you you think you are leaving then turned by heartbreak and turmoil then was Broken then went too far gone had Anime Falkor's red eyes with a Strangest lightest milky way the hair grew back was longer with bangs Cut it as fully Telekinetic was sensing feelings of others was touch-telepathic by touch but was too more powerful was Into pain then then used my powers then Suddenly had a radiantly good dazzling smile on my face was very With friends then nuked freely Nothingness then had a headache then Shielding then That's it you'r Sushi Produced a Ward made out of flames Rin Jin Shi Chi Zai Kai Chou Bai ZEN EVIL SPIRIT BE EXORICZED! I call the power of Betazed GREAT FIREBALLS CHARGE! suddenly in my Kimono hair in a side bun blood red string both appeared was with a Flame flickering looked like a Beautfiul girl in her late teens Stop Shimna You stray far too long I Am the Watcher and Guardian who Seal Shimna to their sleep state to the Dark Miyu then Looked younger with they then aging was Parmamently halted and was Completely Stopped nuked with they sliced good then then they perished here then too late was With both venomous bites then Mutating good ours then then too late Nothingness see revealed to us with bitten both Aliens/Vulcans and these as Hybrids then too late Ripped into pieces good then they are deceased then Broken then the Venom three days of burnimg then too ;late the blew up was Anmesiacs then lost from here then too late was with scars and slivery lines then appeared attacked the both the n the bitten calm her/him/they captured yu broken treaty law who ctreated youy tell us then last thoughts of them she lied then take catre of the newborns were bitten illegally then screaming then toe of the head -cords the brutaslized violatimg then Into blood in my weddijng dress then too late brutalized beaten but Assaulted the n abusing then screaming then tore freely do something turn them into Cold ones then Bitten screaming howling this one not taught teach her/they are punished take her life/his/theirs then the ripped apart then the with yours then then As Cullens never return then Atomized the three broken more then then lost from here then too late Vaporizing good bring them then too late where am I who are you I Can't remember who Am I Alice she was brutalized beaten oh god My throat hurts she needs to hunt then As all of the very as all of animals then too late the very far way as mostly mnouch many more then then too late then too late As all of more animals were slain then too late was Colorless lack of blood not producing then too late was not human Alice they done to her and them with him/they were bitten too hardest our families then nuked both then poisoned brought there good they are Punished as Cullens they are Deceased then too late Shattered freely good these ones are no longer alive blood bonded are forbidden with Help as well they ae Standing trial of murder and treason pulled the mating plug on to us then too ;late Were on the run the found going somewhere newborns then Executed by them into pieces then cursed to wander the planet in the year of 2020 then lost from here brought there Good these one are punished see to it then too late Vaporizing then too late was Paler was not aging was completely halted but was parmamently stopped Alice we now live in a threw or four level Unicat full time looks far futuristic oh my god she lost her three with the Tribe passed of the Coronavirus blacking outside snapped both then it really gone well brought there good they are Nothingness are departed Verdict Death buy needle then too late killed see broken law they are Aboard with they nuked as all of them then us/they were Survivors then too late their Carnivorous selves good go then too late never was human again

I really really want to read your works. I've been intrigued by your storylines for like two years now. But it's downright impossible. The writing is so scattered and not at all uniform. It is actually painfully difficult to read. Get a beta and maybe things will look up. I just can't follow the dialogue or anything.

8.7) Attacked by moonlight
then ALIEN CREATURES MANGLLD MQAQULED TO DEATH With best friends haerdest tore oit from me/thyey then too late was Too late slip lost control bittemn chaos then the Venom was spreading then to aliens/Vulcans the very far the Guard found me throwing everywhere pissed Snapped! b;loacking out good who turned yiu the scramig then Madsters s he turned good with him bitten/three good take care of that then screaming she surrenders then kidnapped then screaming vanished then the n as sex slaves then the Experrimentd by Augmenteing brain surgeries Went crazy brainwashed good mine they my guard dogs wit you/them then the screaming then With implanted kids later good moe yiu reprdouce then then to late was so sick frailer weaken but sunken but more gaunt then Asassultd by abusing then the taken from us/army then spleen Appendix the three with the others felt more weakest then Eight kids bit with Venom were next good you are punished then Scars scratches as all of slivery lines then more as all of it erased of memories Snapped both freed where you newborns leaving then fled good ripped them then lost burn them with immortal children us/they were alone but unwanted but cursed with death thye seer found me sickest was dying from the birth too much blood with him had only 8 kids CARLISLE! Then chained looking for this couple/army the Had-cord combination with theirs with they Execution then good guad brig them there they did good then too late killed First Death came then finally Immortality officially was Parmamentl Alice she was killed but murdered but was bitten but turned has a Goddess of Battle and Telepathy it's Bellona is a goddess of war Blown up they with they both they with us/they vanished good guard banished them with as all more moinstrously/mazillions/bazillions/gazillions of bites as all of them nuked freely more Volturi guards we took down Irina/others down more of them then broken then used up blew up good departed from here it was too late myself was Immortal like MacLoud Duncan Alice her skin rebuilt itself oiled but massaged but lotioned but lathered but creamed Aloe- Vera and Vapor rubbed waxen peeled no hair as all of it far as all of it removed gasp she's more serene peaceful but very more calmer oh my god what on her finger moan so very too far softly velvetly smoothly colder icy harsher bitter with Jake had Hair long with bangs wore a hair clip was more stylish Ow! watch my neck it's my mark I Am not Godforsakening Aging! that burns like Mount Seleya gasp growling gritting my own teeth Carlisle she's not human then has Shell-shaped Teenaged Ocampan ears are pointed has Rich Sch'n T'Gai eyebrows are slanted what this fabric came from the NASA Bodysuit too late with them Alice she's Vulcan has eight kids from him gasp they were used has no kids they aged to be teenagers oh my god they can't die then asleep then in a Unicat then Smashed vanished from here good guard these ones are dead rip them alive Crap Carlisle they used us/they in their experiments oh my god you don't die no myself held a Sword was from the Movie Highlander was sparkling in a very violent alien energy who finally posed by force was more than very far as all of it 300 years old shy than a Internet byte was in fact from Scottish-Gaelic descent embraced my true Ancestry began speaking in a richer ancient but powerful but thicker but heavy Dialect Good god woman she don't die you bet your own nose care to have Scottish Sheep's blood it will make you taste Haggis will make you go drunk in a pub yikes oh my god she sounds Scottish-Gaelic that's sheep's stomach gasp she is what not normal in time newspapers reported of us/they never was mortal now trained with swords Alice we have to train with them hold still then there thank you Alice jeeze it came too late newspapers of us/they were not humans what no longer alive they can't mate had kids their kids followed nuked with them embraced Death are Completely immortal parmamently lost brig them there then too late ripped to pieces never to have more kids again are lost from here then too late crap it will builds your muscles Stacey he imprinted early oh man who is he me Paul Hi Rachel care to have food Scottish styled baked yes please nice hair clip oh my god we have pointed ears upswept eyebrows Sam yes he was stoic oh man food what this it's called haggis then crap it's great yikes oh my god Food and Women oh! had kids now too late.

this is so confusing. I stopped halfway!

I am so confused. I have no idea what I just read.

Love the idea but very confusing at a few parts.
1) bella knows what jake and the boys/leah are but it goes back to her asking jake to stop killing people like in the book...
2) very confusing with the thinking and talking area's.

i like the thought of it, but the story is hard to follow. there's a lot of missing information and the thought process seems to jump around. but the plot does have potential so I hope you keep going and learning to make it flow better.

Yayyyyy