Awww...I liked that.

Nice little story, I'm always a sucker for young Don/young Charlie stories.

That was an amazing oneshot! I love it. Very well written and sweet

-chris

Aww, mini-Charlie is so cute! N i love Don!

Nice story.

so cute

So sweet and fluffy! I love it, which is kind of strange since I'm not generally into sugary sweet and fluffy fics.

Say it with me now... Aw...

Very sweet little story. I love it.

Thanks for sharing,

Emily

Very nice story, I love reading stories about Don and Charlie when they were younger. Hope to read more from you soon :)

What a sweet, sweet story! I loved it! One of my instant favorites!

I enjoyed this look into Don and Charlie's childhood, and how protective Don was of Charlie. Thanks for posting this!

I liked your story; it was an interesting look into the possible relationship between the brothers when they were younger.

Your description of Don not wanting to wake up and thinking that he could move out to the garage was completely indicative of the thought process of your typical 17/18 year old.

The reason I wrote 17/18 is because in your summary you say that Don is 18 but the character identifies himself as 17 in the story.

There were two places where I had to go back and read the dialogue a couple of times because I was unsure who was actually speaking.

Example one:

“You didn’t do it,” he objected softly. He smiled grimly. here you use the pronoun ‘he’ twice referring to each brother but it is unclear who does the speaking and who does the smiling.

“No,” he agreed. “But that doesn’t make it better, huh?” Charlie shook his head, but momentarily drew back, eyeing his brother curiously. Here there were 2 things that stumped me. I honestly thought that two people were speaking because the word “No,” seemed like a reply to the above line ‘You didn’t do it,’ and the use of the pronoun ‘he’ in ‘he agreed’ had me wondering now who said the “No,”. It sounded like the next bit of dialogue - “But that doesn’t make it better, huh” was said by the other brother because the second line starts with a capitol ‘B’ in the word ‘But’.

After going back and reading it again I realized that Don was speaking and the ‘he agreed’, was a pause in his sentence.

Example two:

“You know, you’re thirteen now,” he commented dryly. Charlie smiled sleepily.

Very sweet story. Good conversation between the brothers. :-) I liked it.