This... is brilliantly well written!

I love this so much! It is one of my favorite Literati stories ever!

O.O I must have more! please don't end it here!

Absolutely fantastic!

Curious...when Rory says, "I never knew my dad. Not really," why does Jess throw a twig? Wouldn't that indicate that he DID know his dad? Beautiful moment, but that aspect of it confused me.

Great job!

Wow. No words, and yet so much to say! I absolutely loved this. Every part of it. Good I miss Lit ..and I miss well written, realistic lit fics ..and this is what I've been looking for. Thank you so much! And I read someone wrote something about Jess swearing, that you should have omitted it ..I mean BS ..have they met Jess? :)

thanks again, for sorta making my day here!

I love the holding hands part...so cute!

I enjoyed your story. I guess I feel having them kiss here detracts from their real first kiss (which spawned a an intense summer of ‘shippery and a thousand fanfics), but I did feel that their game got interestingly intimate, right about the time they were bonding over absentee fathers. That was a moment I wanted to freeze-frame and explore more. There is a dark, quiet sweetness to these early lit fics, the innocent girl and the knowing boy. The tentative groping. Always nice to revisit. Thanks for writing it.

wow. that there was...wow. really really good. so cute, i absoluely love! i mean it..super good. extrodinary. amazing. i love to pieces, defianetely going on my favorite's !

macy

Brilliant! It's so expressive, complicated, detailed, and it all works. You write so well - not a spelling error to speak of, and everyone is in character. Great job.

Very good!

do you have a sequal to this story i would love to know what happen to the both of them

Good job; could have left out Jess swearing at the end. Overall, good oneshot.

Wow! I just stumbled on this...so good! So well written, and so realistic. Great, believable dialogue. This is not your average fanfic. I really enjoyed reading this!