Reviews for A Destiny That Binds
civilianstick chapter 56 . 1/10/2017
Holy gorgonzoly. You up and finished this thing before I put up the second chapter of Wakers of the Wind, and I never even thought to look. Just finished reading everything post-Spirit Temple, and I must admit it's kind of sad to see it finally over, but I enjoyed it all immensely.

Some things I took note of in the final stretch:

You made the right decision by playing up Ganondorf's hamminess rather than trying to develop him as a character. The only time that's ever worked for me is in Wind Waker when the story essentially revolves around him; in such a straightforward good-vs-evil story as OoT, it just seems odd for him to be anything other than a maniacal fireball enthusiast who calls his enemies filthy maggots and worms.

The Tales influence was always obvious. There was a story I used to follow called Z Skit Theater, which I may have found through your favs way back when, and it's always struck me how similar the spirits' interactions are with that of a wacky JRPG. I always enjoyed the sarcasm in the dialogue, but you offset it in the revamp with dramatic moments played almost entirely straight which made it easier to treat the story as more than a vehicle for comedy bits.

The Dark Link subplot was resolved in a cleaner, less hackneyed and more satisfying manner than before - so was the entire ending, without the "ok thanks for saving the entire world now go away and also the fairy is leaving you so enjoy being homeless nobodies forever" angle.

Your descriptions have always been on the brief side, but do they really need to be long-winded when everyone who reads it is going to have the whole setting clear in their mind already? It always got the gist across without lingering too long and detracting from the narrative.

The only real niggle I still have is something that's been around since before the revamp (I think towards the end of the original and for the MM sequel). Originally, all your dialogue lines ended like "[words words words]..." , which is also present in OoT's game dialogue but didn't really fit with the young chipper & hip protagonists. Eventually you stopped doing that, but replaced it with '"[words words words]." Said [character]'.

Whenever dialogue is followed by a verb ('said' or whatever else), it should have been punctuated with a comma (if not a ? or ! or ...), and the verb should have been lower case ("[words words words]," said [character]). I never wanted to point it out before, but I figure I might as well now if we're being retrospective.

I dunno if I've said it before, but I really owe a lot to ADTB. My current baby, Wakers of the Wind, was originally born way back when as a sort of 'what if A Destiny That Binds but set in Wind Waker and where every main character is a Joey, Kaori or Aya' deal, and there's another non-literary Zelda project I've been working on which I've just noticed borrows a whole lot from the concept of the Spirits. It's a free country.

Congratulations on finally slaying the dragon.
ZombieDragon chapter 56 . 10/15/2016
Hi Alli-dunno,

I don't know if you remember me, but I used to be a huge fan of this story when I was in high school. I am also in the same boat as you - I don't even want to even look at my past stories because I know they are cringe-worthy, and I also have zero desire or drive to continue writing anything, let alone fanfiction, haha.

Anyways - I'll try to remember to read the revamped version now that its finished.
Guest chapter 38 . 12/2/2015
it really sucks that the story isn't bumped to the front page and considered "updated" when you revise a chapter because it's clearly depriving you of feedback, since your last review was 3 years ago

just wanted to let you know i still check this fic for revised chapters every few months whenever i remember to, and your technical/narrative writing skills have improved so much even over the space of the past few chapters i can't wait to see what you do with the spirit temple & ganon

youve made the interactions of the spirits with each other and the world around them feel so much more believable & realistic, the rushed "spirits say snappy things for 5 minutes and then game stuff happens" pacing has been completely fixed, and on the whole it reads more like a surreal, self-aware zelda JRPG/shonen anime than a crossover fanfiction, which is a real unique concept i don't think i've seen before

to tell the truth, every time i read a chapter i get the urge to go back to writing my own stuff on here and maybe i'll actually get to that soon, though it's been so long i've got no clue what my account details were

i've been continually reading this story in its different forms for 9 years (just under half my entire life) and i dont think i'll ever get tired of it, so keep at it
Gui chapter 57 . 4/17/2012
You don't need a female OC for each male character. You can make a male OC who could be great friend with Link. Like Crazy a copyrighted OC owned by me. Crazy is insane in a good way and lucky, extremely lucky but the backlash of such luck make him look pityfull. Expecialy when his luck allow him to survive falling head first from the top of the Deku Tree. You don't have to make him one of the Gardians, more like the Goddesses fucked up their teleportation. I would suggest Raven from the Teen Titan to replace Kaori.
civilianstick chapter 57 . 1/4/2012
*flogs with wooden stick*

AAAHHH HIATUS.

Yeah, it kind of sucks that Kaori's just, sort of... hanging there. It's like you said - yesterday I was going through the lost tomes of My Old Laptop, and some of the stuff on there makes me want to gouge my eyes out. Good GOD I was bad at writing in 2006. Then again, I was 9 at the time, so whatever. Either way, take the hiatus if you want. This story got me into crossover-type-fantasy fics with heavy doses of snark and lampshading, and I have the entire thing (pre-revamp) saved on my old laptop so even if you delete it I can still read through it. Basically, do what you want to. I personally would just leave it on hiatus (because I totally haven't abandoned all of my fics for a year or two now), but that's just me. If you want to, go ahead, cancel it and do something else. But if the hypothetical chance arises that you get some uber-awesome solution to how to make Kaori more bearable to write, you could just be all UN HIATUS YAYYY and continue it whenever you see fit.

That's just my little ramblings, though. You should be able to work out what you want to do with the fic. :)
civilianstick chapter 20 . 10/7/2011
And so I return, like a sudden wind on a kindergarten picnic! The drama was better-written, and Link's reactions were a lot more realistic! I'd write a longer/more detailed review, but I have a cold now and I'm all cold-like and stuff and bleeeeh D:

So yeah. Waiting for more noowww~
civilianstick chapter 19 . 10/7/2011
There you go, here's your delayed review. :3 This was good as usual. The typical pre-boss banter is present and correct, and your explanation of the Spirits' purpose and history is elaborated on. DIIIE MIDO FWAHAHAHA. Now, onto chapter 20!
eterniachan chapter 20 . 8/22/2011
It's good to get some of the random out and make it a little more serious. But anyway, nice job.
eterniachan chapter 19 . 8/22/2011
Hooray for long explanation chapters! Anyway, another wonderful revision, dear. :3
eterniachan chapter 18 . 8/22/2011
Hooray for lampshading! :D

But yeah, poor Kaori is useless. Oh well. She's there, so may as well lampshade it like you said. :3
civilianstick chapter 18 . 8/17/2011
Took me longer than usual to read this one, due to being distracted by ridiculously late lunch and other things BUT this review shouldn't be too delayed SOOOOOOOOO on with the reviewinggg

I see you couldn't think of a way to improve Kaori's character. She's the Colette of this fic, and so I guess if you can't make her better, just let her admit she's a fifth wheel with the others. There's one trope which springs to mind when I think about her, though, and that's Yamato Nadeshiko. There might be some tips on the TVTropes article on making her a little more interesting, I don't know.

You're doing good on making the rest of the game more believable though, with Navi coming up with the name 'boss key', and Wallmasters dragging you to a painful death instead of being so evil as to... drop you by the exit of the temple.

Also, I just realised when reading right now, that Link is this fic is like Goku plus severe brain trauma, and it's great. If the writer's block is going, I'll be glad to see the next chapter! :3
Guest chapter 1 . 7/13/2011
I dont know most of these people and i cant see their place in OoT.
civilianstick chapter 17 . 5/21/2011
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This

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OH MY GOD

This chapter is the best you've written so far. Out of anything you've written. ANYTHING.

There was so much description, and the characters are all 3-dimensional, and Mido and Saria aren't just 'bully and naive childhood friend' and aaaaaaaaaaa 3

I don't know why but I am in love with this chapter. Keep it up like this PLEEEEEEEASE. AAAAAAAAGHASDF.
civilianstick chapter 16 . 5/21/2011
AAAAAHHHHHHHHH NEW CHAPTER WHAT

Goddammit, FFN should tell me when you revamp these chapters, asdfasjkdfahsdjf!

Anyway, awesome as always. I agree, Mido deserves a little more... well, not love, but still. You're great at adding third dimensions to characters like that!

One tiiiiiiiiny spelling error, though:

"No how to ruin a moment, don't you oh wonderful guide of ours." Joey responded with a questioning tone.

Know, not no, but that's just a tiny error. Anyway, I'm gonna go ahead and r/r the rest of these new revamps!
eternia chapter 16 . 5/6/2011
Rereading these chapters never ceases to amuse me. :3
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