Kiiiiiiitty! OMG! Nice update! And I love how comfortable they are right now to almost talk about their escapades.

PLEASE PLEASE update PLEASE

It's very funny and interesting to read, so please continue, yeah?

Both characters behave very differently from canon. It's fun to find Bart acting like a school girl crushing on Nat. Surprised I was that Nat refused to let Bart go with him, he did say he needed his 'protection', that is contradictory.

And where's Kitty? LOL

Wow! You updated, yay! And I reread like crazy all the chapters and wow isn't the sexual tension building up quite rapidly? Loved the banter in the previous chapter and in this one. Kudos!

hahahaahah
Now I want to see more! A urban Nathaniel? Runes? He being a normal human? Fantastic!

I really love your story. Please update soon!

O well this is a new nat! I love it, please continue!

waiting for the next, good luck

Update update update! I love B/N and B/k stories!

Sweet Ra! FINISH IT! Please? It's so very amazing. Potential is dripping from this. So...i'll be waitin' away, lassie (:

I'm just so glad there's someone who feels Nat should've lived and gotten a second chance! I hate that he died in the book, even though it was an amazing ending.

What?! WHAT! Oh come on, don't leave me in a cliff hanger, I want to know what wil happen! I can't believe that Nat said he was relived! Gaah polkas update soon. SOON! :))

Oh, dear. This may be in need of a beta. The writing is excellent in places, and you've captured Nathaniel well. Bartimaeus, however, not so much. Remember that a) he is an ancient and extremely sarcastic demon, b) not prone to over-the-top feelings, and c) since when is he over Ptolemy? Seems to me that you need to include some kind of transferal of affection. Also, do remember the footnotes while Bartimaeus is narrating. Those are often the best parts of his chapters.
Remember that this woman probably shouldn't know Nathaniel's birth name (unless I've forgotten something that happened in the books, which is possible). Other magicians, commoners, etc. should call him John Mandrake.
There are also issues of grammar. Be careful where you use your apostrophes. For instance: "Nathaniels...well..." "Nathaniels" needs to be "Nathaniel's", because you're shortening "Nathaniel is".
The first letter of the first word in a sentence should be capitalized every time.
Don't mix up 'your' with 'you're', because it really is distracting. I love the ship and I love this story, but please watch your grammar.
With that aside, I'd like to congratulate you on your descriptions. When you're showing Nathaniel from Bartimaeus' point of view, it's absolutely adorable.
Excited to see the next chapter!
Kat

"Oh dear Ra in the sky! Bloody hell no!" - That's gonna become what I say whenever something weird/unexpected happens. Or when I'm just plain bored.

I hope you haven't decided to abandon this fic! I'll wait as long as you want for the next chapter. Here's a cookie to get you motivated! :D