Oh! This is beautiful! With just a little, faint, sweet, sad foreboding at the end. Thank you so much. Keep writing!

That was very sweet. I think you captured Susan's personality perfectly, what with all her planning. And I love how she put together something that she knew Lucy would love.

Lovely! I loved that a Susan-the-gentle story was so gentle, but also the subtlety of the many reminders that this perfect day was the last, would not last, forever, as in "Or maybe the last of something . . . something that will never be made again."
Sad and gentle. I liked the sun being on Susan's face as she was swept by the premonition (oh, but "she couldn't go back"!).
(As for the keep - surely they'd need three to staff it? Two to keep guard and one to go with a message, if danger threatened?)
Thanks for letting us share this birthday gift, and many happy returns of that day to your sister. :)

Such happy day.

This is positively lovely. It's probably the best Pevensie family-moment fanfic I've read in all of my forays into the Narnia archives. Wonderful work!

Oh, how beautiful! A wonderful encounter with four leaders, escaping their minders for the day, and with some wonderful foreshadowing at the end to lend it a lovely conclusion. Very nice, I like it.

I like this cheerful story!

Lovely! :) Absolutely brilliant...to the highest degree! :) Awesome job!

All for Aslan,

Queen Susan the Gentle

A great story. Very good.

It's taken me forever to get around to reading this, but I'm so glad I did. The imagery of this story was just beautiful and the end was haunting and heartbreaking in the best way possible. The Pevensies are so perfectly in character here in everything they do that it's wonderful. I'm so happy such a talented author wrote something for one of our NFFR challenges! Thank you!

Wonderful story, you Pevensie's are real characters, believable and show genuine affection for each other :)

Aw, man...you did it! You totally did a "knowing" fic, as i call them: in which the Kings and Queens somehow just FEEL or KNOW that their reign isn't going to last forever, that there is some secret foreboding haunting them! Awesome! *U*

This was BEAUTIFUL! I suppose I should expect it by now, but your work NEVER fails to blow me away! *U* You were BRILLIANT here!

Man...Lu, Ed, Su, and Pete together, as Kings and Queens of Narnia, just enjoying a day with each other... SO SWEET, especially when you consider how busy and constricted them are when it comes to their positions, like what Susan and Peter were discussing in the pond. I actually had the read the 'sad, adult understanding smile' line twice; it was so disheartening and beautifully profound at the same time! :'(

lol. Nice, Ed, poking at Peter for being a horrid escapee, dunking Lu, and then, wrenching his elbow! XD He's just ASKING for more pain! XD

She is such an awesome sister, planning everything she knew Lucy'd love (she's GOOD-even down to the green riding dress)! It made me sad at the same time, though, when Su told Lucy that she knew her: it made me think of 'Last Battle', when Su DOESN'T express that she knows Lucy anymore, that she's denied EVERYTHING about Narnia, INCLUDING her relationships with her siblings! T.T

Rock on! I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE THIS, as I do all of your work, and I cannot WAIT to see more from you! Say happy birthday to your sister to me! *U* *U*

Ever-so sincerely signed,

Shizuku Tsukishima749 :D ;D :) ;)

Such a sweet story - and then with the words "“Perhaps we might come here more often then,” Susan suggested, but even as she said it, she knew it could never be." - it starts turning bittersweet. First it's just that she knows that using it for an ordinary castle outing won't be the same. "There might even be Ministers."

But then they start talking about the Stag, and when any Golden Age-fic starts talking about the Stag, that's when I catch my breath and know that something will be wrong.

Even Susan has a premonition that Edmund's assurance that 'something must happen', isn't necessarily a good thing. It mars the perfectness of the day for her.

"... there was a sort of hushed ache in her voice as she spoke, echoing her sister’s words of earlier that day, voicing the hope shared by all four under the late summer sun:

'Don’t you wish we could stay here forever?'"

You're making us feel how she nearly catches the double meaning of her own word 'here' - and we know that her wish won't be granted ...

This was such a delight to read! All of Susan's planning paid off and she was rewarded by not only the happiness of the birthday girl but of her brothers as well. Trying to picture Susan scaling the walls of the kitchen gardens was pretty funny, and I am glad that the Kings were able to share in this family-only gathering. It really is a shame that this was probably the last time they had a nice private moment together before the Stag led them back to the Wardrobe. I ached a bit for Susan as that feeling that something Must happen came over her and tarnished the outing slightly.

Also, I think this story makes a lovely birthday gift for your sister. Many happy returns of the day for her, too.

What a wonderful story - much characterization (of Susan and Lucy at least) for a short story and you painted such a colorful picture of their day together!