The bonding of the girls over their periods were beautiful.

Kakashi’s an ass though.

GIRL POWER

I really liked your story
I admit that there were times when I didn't have a good time: Sakura's attitude often made me crazy.
The interaction between Ami and Sasuke is too beautiful, one of my favorite things.
The Narusaku end was not to my liking, but it was fine.
I definitely love how Sasuke really shows that he loves Ami and his children
By the way, you haven't thought about a parallel story where Itachi, Fugaku and Mikoto see the new Uchiha-Konno family, it would be too good to read. I hope you consider it
Your story is very good, keep it up.

Bollocks

fuck... i just finished this and I don't even know what to do with my life anymore. Thank you so much for writing this, i loved it

...kohaku as in Kohaku from spirited away?

i like that you changed "coolest guybc he killed ur parentsmessed up ur life dude) but lol..."alright"...imagine dying and thats the best someone has to say about you. can't think of a better word though

So I found a photo on my screenshot on 2016 XD
I come back here and it’s wow,completed
I can’t wait to reread this! *excited*

Okay! This is really, really long! I’m sorry, I tend to do these things but this is my analysis of your story, I’ve also put some tips for your writing. I might have been a little harsh and I’m sorry but I don’t mean ill, people need critism to get better.

In Naruto, technology is very liminted. There are barely any cameras let alone theatres. Also, 'Finding Nemo'? Could you not have thought of a different movie they could’ve watched if you were doing this, and by different movie, I mean your own! A girl whom wanted to find out the mystery of her parents, in doing so she kidnaps a ninja for answers. It could be anything! Also, the horse thing was silly. Genin could definitely out run a horse if they wanted too, it’s a world on which a jounin could run faster than a cheetah.

Second, do you forget Sasuke and Ami were twelve when you decided to romanticise them! I mean, playful banter leading up to crushes and stuff but dating was a bit of a stretch. Sasuke, rarely, swears too. He kind of falls into the Tsundere trope when it comes to romance but way more quieter.

Sakura may suck and I don’t like her in my personal opinion but she isn’t that bitchy. She gets better, still agressive and a little bitchy but not at all like the way you wrote her. Sasuke was written poorly too, he is quiet and is a jerk but there are things you pretty much missed. He wouldn’t have opened up that easily. It’s a key fact, even after the Land of Waves arc (in which he significantly improved) he was still a bit cold to Naruto or teasing. He doesn’t let down his kind and sweet side often and if he does it’s after something important, like him almost losing Ami or Ami getting hurt because of him! He also doesn’t take failure lightly and would be harsh on himself. He DOESN'T act flustered or at least tries not to because he’s an idiot who doesn’t know how to voice emotions! He’s Sasuke Uchiha for damns sake! He’s blunt and straight to the point and if not, quiet and kinda a dork!
Example: 'Ami stirred awake, familiarising her surroundings. She realised whilst she had been asleep her blanket had slipped off of her slightly. She cracked an eye open to see the upright body of the Uchiha. She cracked open her other eye and looked up to the Uchiha who was staring down at her. His cheeks were a faint pink she could barely make out and he looked... Flustered? She furrowed her brows, he wasn’t looking at her, instead, slightly below. She felt overwhelmed with embarrassment. The Uchiha however, still wasn’t moving.

“Sasuke?” She said with a blush.

He blinked before turning to the girl. “A-Ami... I-...” He struggled for words, feeling more embarrassed before he quickly turned away from her, averting his eyes to the floor. “I'll let you get ready..”'

See what I mean? He might stammer but he doesn’t elaborate and quite honestly tries to avoid embarrassing conversations, like when he asked Naruto what Sakura told him (in the anime) for the tree climbing training! He got embarrassed asking for help because he’s too prideful!

Aside from that, it doesn’t really make that much sense, like when she found out she liked him, it just didn’t flow. Most things don’t really flow too, you made everything seem too convenient or out of the blue, it didn’t make sense. Sasuke's actions seemed forced as well.

Grammar wise, you did well but make sure you double check your work for spelling mistakes. Aside from that be more descriptive! Don’t just write 'Sasuke's ears were ringing, but he didn’t mind a whole lot', no! Don’t do that! Sasuke doesn’t like loud noise but Naruto is his best friend! 'Sasuke's ears were ringing as he flinched slightly from the Uzumaki's loudness but instead sighed before a slight smirk graced his lips. He wouldn’t change his best friend for the world.' Now isn’t that sweet, not the best, but it’s a start!

The main thing I’ve been trying to voice is analyse the characters you want to write about and be them! Live what they’re living, feel what they are feeling! Understand them as a character, understand their age and understand their story and personality. Some characters may be as soft as sponge and others may have solid rock walls but a good heart. Also, understand the world you are writing about! Not just technology wise, mind you. What they are living! The seriousness of their circumstances. The fact that this world is life or death.

Out of all of the 12 months of the year

out of all of the 365 FUCKING DAYS you pick the 23rd oF APRIL-

WE SHARE THE SAME BIRTHDAY

It annoys me that sauske is considered a brother to naruto when he was in the team for such A short time and all they ever did was fight. Brothers fight I know, but they also care. Sauske and naruto never had that kind of bond.

"I don't want to wait I want to save garra now!" FUCK off idiot let the REAL ninja work... lol sorry he annoys me

Ffs now he's trying to give THEM orders?! Hes not even Chunin! Ahh someone please knock his head against a rock until the rock cries!

Tell me naruto gets suspended for not following orders and endangering his team and the Kyubii?! I never liked him and it's why I never watched much of the show either. He's stupid and ALWAYS acts before he thinks.

It never made sense to me that they sent NARUTO on this mission. He's basically a pacifist (not itachi pacifist but annoying judgemental pacifist) who holds the nine tailes on a mission with high probability of facing an organization that wants to CAPTURE said nine tailes. It's like dangling a steak in front of a hungry bear! It's a NINJA village full of anbu, jonin, and shit. They couldn't find a few people besides him?

He wants to be Hokage and has problems with death? What a fucking idiot! What I did he think being a ninja entailed? What does he think he's been training for? He asks for Jutsu and what? He think it's cool light tricks? They attacked her! They went at her with intent to kill! She defended herself from the threat.
You captured naruto perfectly. He always annoyed me with his oblivion to evil. You can't befriend everyone. He's an idiot and I hope she doesn't take him seriously. Threatening her with her sister made me mad.