I watched an expose on those "Christian boarding schools" that KIDNAP KIDS AND TAKE THEM OUT OF THE UNITED STATES for things as varied as BEING A RAPE VICTIM to TROUBLE MAKING FOR THEIR PARENTS to BEING GAY! It was called Jesus Land and this particular one was ALL THE WAY IN SOUTH AMERICA!THERE'S ALSO A BOOK WITH THE SAME NAME,IF YOU WANT TO READ IT FOR YOURSELF!Now,I am a Christian,but this was TORTURE,making them run up steep hills and back down over 29 times or more UNTIL THEY PUKED OR PASSED OUT FROM THE HEAT OF THE SOUTH AMERICAN CONTINENT!My faith in Jesus is VERY STRONG,BUT ALSO VERY PERSONAL TO EXPERIENCE!PEOPLE ON THE OTHER HAND,I COULD DO WITHOUT,my Great Aunt on my Mama's side(my Grandma's Sister)is a perfect example of what I call a"Super Christian",the try to act better than everyone else,but they have more skeletons in their closets than the people they are judging for doing all kinds of bad things!Their thinking about being gay was that the person HAD TRUST ISSUES WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX AND JUST NEEDED TO WORK IT OUT TO BE NORMAL AND HAPPY!THEY SHOWED AFTERWARDS,A SUPPORT GROUP THAT MET FOR VICTIMS OF "INSTITUTIONAL ABUSE"! I felt very lucky because in the 11th grade of High School,I ALMOST WAS PUT INTO 1 IN WEST VIRGINIA!MY TIME THERE WOULD HAVE TAKEN ME AWAY FROM MY FRIENDS AND NOT LET ME GRADUATE WITH THEM,EITHER!THANKFULLY,THE STATE RAN OUT OF MONEY TO FUND IT AND I DIDN'T HAVE TO GO THERE!MY AUNT HAD MY GRANNY GUILT TRIP ME INTO PROMISING HER THAT I WOULD GO,SO SHE COULD KNOW I WAS ABLE TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF BEFORE SHE DIED!SHE LIVED FOR 7 MORE YEARS AFTER THIS HAPPENED,BUT I WAS CONVINCED THAT IF I DIDN'T RESPECT HER WISHES TO DO THIS SHE WOULD DIE AND IT WOULD BE MY FAULT FOR NOT HONORING HER REQUEST!GUILT IS A CRAZY THING! IN MY HUMBLE OPINION,THE CATHOLICS HAVE IT DOWN TO A SCIENCE!Anyway,what I really mean is this is a good story to read!Keep up the good work writing!

I absolutely loved reading this!

Too cute!11

Fucking awesome! So funny and hot!

I've re-read this so many times, love it

Ridiculously funny. LMFAO

Wow! J'ai adoré! Original!

Google Translate. French.

Montréal , Québec

Loved it.

:)

Emmett was a hoot. Especially all his crazy stunts. And I loved the little jokes, and Bella's crazy character.

Bible school can be fun it seems, as long as you are amen-ing to Edward Cullen!

OMG! You are a freaking genius! Bella was a damn trip and a half. And of course Emmett ...love him! That stunt with the fire ants...hilarious! I love even more after finding out he was playing them both.

I can't believe Edward was a bad boy after all that. I almost thought he was going to reform Bella after her sexual assault of him on the football field.

Holy shit. This was ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC! It was hot and hilarious and I loved every freakin second of it! Genius the way the Emmett part played out too. I loved that. :)

Thanks for sharing this with us, love. It's definitely one of my new favorite one shots!

A-fucking-MEN! Lol. Great story! Your little ditty was rec'd on Robattack ob Friday. Glad I came...he he!

AMEN! That was fucking awesome! I want this Edward! I love him both ways, good and bad! I wanna be sent away to a Catholic school and find Edward after reading this!

Loved! So fun.

LOVED THIS! Edward .. omg! LOOL amazing story!